Confession: I'm Struggling With My Post-Baby Body

You write about this in such a sane-- and compassionate!-- way. Your child is lucky to have such a mother who models self-care and the knowledge that you are a whole person. And the bonus is your clients are being mentored by a person with a healthy attitude, not a robot.

Thank you so much for letting us in on your journey! Report

I gained weight when I was pregnant and my son is now 4 1/2 months old. I am having a very hard time dealing with my "new" body. I had a c-section and believe me, those "6 weeks to recover" is a lie. I am still recovering. My stomach is still tender and I am still wearing stretchy pants because my pants with buttons irritate my stomach. And with a little one around in constant need, that has become my exercise routine. If I knew this was how it was going to be I would have lost my weight before I got pregnant. lol.

Anyway, my son is healthy and I am doing ok. So I have to thankful for that. I know the weight will come off so I just have to keep going! Report

OK, I got my weight back to what it was before pragnancy - I lost even thouse pounds that I had too much before pregnancy.
But still: what does my belly look like? Where are those muscles of steel gone? Report

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Post baby boy is so much struggling for a woman at the middle age.Great problem for them.
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know how hard it is to cope with it because i have seen my sister go through a tough period for a long amount of time.post-natal body is something that must not be subjected to too much pressure.but women can do light exercises and pick up pace slowly,i think.its doable for sure,that is getting back the old fitness.but it takes patience for sure,a lot of it .

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Don't give up, everything would be fine.

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ust pat yourself on the back for working on it now, it has been 21 years for me and I'm finally getting the message it is ok to take some time for my fitness. Looking back, after my child reached four we should have just made it a habit to take a 10 minute walk before dinner got started -- on yea I remember the list of school supplies, running to lessons, time is always a challege. Don't fool yourself, the models have personal trainers, chefs, drugs, nannies, and plastic surgeons.
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Thank you so much for sharing this post. The celebrity moms out there must be genetically blessed in ways that the rest of us just aren't. Regardless, the images can be damaging and comparison is a one way street to endless negative thoughts.
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i know how hard it is to cope with it because i have seen my sister go through a tough period for a long amount of time.post-natal body is something that must not be subjected to too much pressure.but women can do light exercises and pick up pace slowly,i think.its doable for sure,that is getting back the old fitness.but it takes patience for sure,a lot of it
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In my opinion, the most important thing is how you feel. If you feel that you need to loose some weight, start excercising regularly. I know it´s difficult with small baby, but you should find a time and soon you will feel much better. Ornela from http://www.best-webhost-review.com Report

I'm in the same boat, but my daughter is a year old now and the weight just isn't coming off like I expected! Report

I breastfed my children. I also didn't lose the last of the "baby pudge" until my youngest was about 7 - and I mean YEARS, not months. Live healthy, and give time a chance. Report

Thanks for sharing. Right now, I'm not struggling with losing the baby weight (I'm actually down below when I got pg with my second and only 3 lb. off from when getting pg with the first).

That being said, I don't look all that great right now. I've been obese my entire adult life and overweight since about the age of 8. I am still nearly 70 lb. over where I want to be.

After the second baby (who is now 10 months old), my belly is horrible. It just hangs there. It's much worse than before and I am amazed since my weight is the same and down nearly 40lb. from my highest pregnancy weight.

I guess I need to get started on toning. I've not done much exercise in years as I am so busy just working and taking care of my family. I'm trying to lose weight mostly by modifying my diet.
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Thank you for sharing whit us. Report

My youngest will turn 2 in 2 months and I am still 23 lbs from my pre-baby, pre-grad school weight. I can't say I'm fine with that but I realize it does take time. Especially when the real focus is on kids and your sanity. Getting the body back is not the #1 item on the to do list. That said, I am making a real effort now and seeing that if I can fit in exercise I do have more energy. Report

yay! a post baby body club! after having my daughter, I had five years to tone my body the way I liked it. I was finally wearing low rise jeans and shorts. Then I got pregnant. Forget the low rise jeans and shorts. It would turn my waistline into a muffin top. My stomach looked like another butt. I swear! Although I had lost all of the pregnancy weight, the belly just lagged behind. Then I got pregnant again. Now it's much worse. I may have lost all of the pregnancy weight but the belly is just horrid to look at in the mirror. It looks like another butt with a very bad liposuction job. I still dream of my toned body wearing low rise jeans and shorts.

I ABHOR sit ups and crunches even though fitness experts swear by it. Forget it! All those infomercials trying to entice us to buy their products was getting to me. The last time I ever bought anything was The Firm Fanny Lifter. I still have it and it has been rarely used. I can only take it one day at a time and eat sensibly. Report

My daughter will be 2 next month, and I am STILL unhappy with my post-baby body! I lost the pregnancy weight, but my stomach still looks like a melted candle. I'm resolving to have loose skin for the rest of my life. (Unless I get a tummy tuck, which is a possibility in the far future.) I used to be really hard on myself, but then I gave my body a little credit. My body grew, nutured, and sheltered a BABY! My body did that, and that is/was an amazing thing! My body deserved credit for what it did rather than criticism for how it looked. Sometimes, it's all about perspective. :) Report

Don't feel too bad. Your already doing a good job! I love to run too, but I found when I was pregnant, I didn't want to do much of anything except sleep! I gained between 30-40 pounds with my daughter. Got 5 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight and breastfed...when I stopped feeding is when I gained the weight back! Because I wasn't eating right or exercising....So good job for you for breastfeeding your newborn and still finding time to exercise! You'll get to where you want to be, it's just gonna take time! Good luck! Report

First off congrats to you for choosing to breast feed! I did with all three of mine until each was a year old. And that was the reason my weight returned to normal so quickly. I also ran and did weight training to tone. On the other hand I did gain a lot of weight with each pregnancy, so it took me at least 6 months to get the "baby fat" off. I wouldn't take much stock in how those celebrity moms did their quick weight loss after pregnancy. After all, since they make a lot of money from their appearance I'm sure they had access to nannies and personal trainers the whole time to make the experience so much easier than the rest of us . Just give yourself time to do it in a healthy manner! Report

I'm still working on losing mypost baby weight, my son is 3 months old and I gained a crap load of weight with him, I'm learning to accept that after having 3 kids I will never have the body I did before kids and C-sections but I can get healthy and love my body again, and the main thing I have to keep telling myself is that It took me 9 months to put the weight on and it will take time for it to come off. Report

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I gained so much weight while I was pregnant - probably around 65lbs (only one baby...). I already had about 30 lbs to lose. Right after I had him, I did lose around 20 or 30 lbs, but I'm still 40 lbs more than when I first got pregnant. My baby is 4 months old now, and I'm just finally starting to get back to eating right. I moved the weekend I had my baby, defended my master's thesis a couple weeks after that, and haven't stopped being busy since. I don't even WANT to compare myself to *celebrity moms* because just looking at regular people makes me feel terrible. I'm still wearing maternity clothes - I probably couldn't even get my size 14 pre-pregnancy jeans over my knees - and I'm sick of them. I have such a long road ahead of me, I don't even want to begin sometimes.

I was doing really well the past week and half, and then last night my husband caught a mistake I had made - I thought I was eating 1 serving of popcorn, but it was actually 3 servings. So, as it turns out, I've only stayed within my calorie range 2 times since I've started tracking. I thought it was a little too easy...

I love my baby though - I would gain a million pounds to have him. He makes me so happy. Report

My first pregnancy was twins, and I gained 56 pounds. I only breastfed for 4 months, and I wsn't very dedicated for the last half of that time (formula seems to be an easy way out). It took YEARS to get back to "normal" especially in the tummy area. Now I am almost 3 weeks postpartum with a single birth. I have diastasis recti (my abs are separated, but not as bad as with the twins). I am breastfeeding with a little supplementation (for baby's jaundice). I gained 35 pounds this time, and though I look flabby I have already lost most of my weight. I think each pregnancy is different...I really expected to keep half of my baby weight on for years again. I feel lucky, but I know that I will "plateau" soon, and when I finally stop breastfeeding I think my weight will rebound. Really, in the end though, all that matters is that sweet little baby - and a good BMI. Report

I am sruggling with the same problem..I have 2 kids. When i had my daughter in 07 i bounced right back...I was a size 2.. Then i had my son on Jan. 28 09..I blew up..And to make matters worst everyone keep sayin you are so fat. Look at how wide your back is..LIKE PEOPLE I HAVE 2 KIDS...its very upsettin to hear it all day from different people...it really hurt but hey i guess its a blessing because if they didn taunt me i would not have found this website... Report

I gained 50 lbs during my pregnancy. Not to include the additional 20 that I was 'working' off before I found out. So all in all, I had 70 to lease. I've lost the 50 lbs..took me about 4 months to do so. I had my daughter in January and like someone else stated, I wasn't too interested in watching my intake and working out. The stress alone of being a new mom, breastfeeding, starting a new job, oh and lets not forget that I relocated to a new state when she was 2 months. So I'm finally getting it together. I been working out consistently for the past 5 weeks. It does get a bit discouraging at times, but I think beginning weight loss is like a new job...I feel that I have to go through a 90 day probationary period...to shock my body and my mind and let them both know that I can do this. I feel like once I make it to that time frame and continue on, that I will start seeing more results and be even more excited to work out.

I don't think my stomach or boobs will ever be the same, but I just want to be more fit and healthy overall and want my eating habits and exercise to rub off on my daughter. I don't want to deprive her becuase I don't have the energy. Thanks for posting this. I really enjoyed reading the article and the comments. Report

I'm still struggling with losing the baby weight and my son is 13 months old! I gained a whopping 40 pounds when I was pregnant. Honestly, when he was first born getting fit, losing the weight, and being active were the furthest things from my mind. Well, I thought about it but didn't dwell because I thought that it was more important at that time for me to spend that time with my son, everything else could wait. But I did have a major problem with giving up the "eating for two" mentality. I wish I knew then what I know now, if that were the case I would have done a lot of things differently when I was pregnant.

As far as the question about the media making it seem easy to get back in to your pre-baby size, I think they do. They have set an unhealthy bar that "normal" women find it impossible to reach...unless you have the money for a personal trainer and dietician and would rather spend all your free time in a gym than with your new baby, which seems kind of ridiculous to me. Don't get me wrong, I do think that being healthy and fit is important, but to me it seems that these woman that are constantly in the public eye are pressured to look a specific way by a specific time. I find it kind of sad, like they can't truly enjoy being new mothers. Report

I am struggling to lose weight after giving birth almost 6 months ago. After my first son was born in 2007 it took me about a year to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight; however, that was 20 pounds heavier than when I met my husband 3 years prior. So, I gained the same amount of weight during my second pregnancy, 34 pounds. However, I lost more right away getting back to 150 within weeks then gained three pounds over the course of the next few months as I was not exercising and still eating like I was. I started back at the gym and really wasn't seeing results that I wanted...you know we want fast results even though it took us 9 months to gain the weight, we want to lose it in 2 months! Anyway, it wasn't until a friend told me about this site and I started tracking my food that I had the eye-opening, mind blowing realization that even though I was "eating less" in an effort to lose weight, I was still eating around 1800 calories and nearly 90 grams of fat per day. Now I am still not losing as quickly as I'd like but I have lost 2 pounds and I am eating right around 1300 calories and 40 grams of fat per day! I am also back at the gym 4-5 days a week. I can't wait to see me in January when my son turns 1. Report

i really struggled after having my children. i lose weight while pregnant: i get so sick. But then i put on weight after. i exercise more and more intensely, eat less and healthier (because i can cook again), and just did more. That how my mom's family is. Its really hard when your genetic makeup works against you. We just can't give up. Some people don't have to fight that. We should never beat ourselves up because our bodies work differently than others. Report

Yes I struggle with my weight and I never did get back to my usual size.
Yes celeberities makes it seem easy, I don't believe they are really telling us the real story on how they got back into shape.

If I had a one on one training coach and all the medication the use I to would be back in shape.

JUST SAYING. Report

It's all about perspective.

I didn't gain as much weight as I or the doctors wanted me to. I quit gaining weight around the 6 month mark with both of my pregnancies. I also ended up delivering my daughter at 35 weeks and my son at 32.

Watching my baby struggle in the NICU for two months I would have given anything to be fat and pregnant worrying about how I was going to lose the weight. Now that my babies are home and (mostly) healthy I do worry about getting my pre-baby body back but on the other hand - why should any of us want that.

Our bodies performed miracles of strength and endurance growing and bringing a new life into the world. There are long term changes (some permanent) that come with that committment. Some things will go back to the way they were (hopefully my hair line) and some won't (stretch marks). Shouldn't all of it be a badge of honor? Shouldn't we be proud of what we have done whether we can run a sub 6 mile or bench press 50+ pounds after the baby? Isn't it more important to be healthy and balanced role models for our children? Report

You will not believe how fast they grow up and your life becomes more "normal" again. I only have one, so I don't have the experience of juggling two of them, but I can say that when my daughter was a baby and toddler, I never felt like I'd have my life back again. Now that she's in school full-time, I can't believe how much more time I have back in my life. I've worked full time since she was 12 weeks old, so it's not like I'm trying to figure out how to fill my days now that she's in school! But, the evenings and weekends are so much more "mine" again since she's interested in what she wantst to do. We do a lot together as a family, but now she can help me a lot more than she could when she was really little. It's so much fun! Enjoy the baby times, because like everyone says, they go so fast! Report

I'm struggling with the weight now and i hate to see those celebrities that lose the weight to quickly it just seems so unhealthy to put your body through that Report

Being "skinny" is not all it is cracked up to be. I always have had a high metabolism and been thin, but I was never healthy. Women come in all shapes and all sizes. Pregnancy weight gain is no different. My first son, who is 10, I went from 105 to 163. With little to no effort , I did lose that weight within 6 months. However, I was only 18 and didn't have my 2nd until I was 25. BIG difference. Went from 132 to 194 and ended up pre-eclamptic. After almost 2 1/2 years I finally made it down to 138.(I hate exercise) I was pregnant with #3 and, you guessed it, again I gained from 138 to 227 by the time I had her. (I feel I have to make a note here. She was 10 lbs. 4 oz) I ended up preeclamptic again. Well, my blood pressure did not go down this time and I ended up on blood pressure medicine. Now, 9 months later, I am down to 160 and determined to get into a bikini this summer. I know with a healthy diet and moderate exercise, I will achieve this goal. Your body will tell you what is too much. Don't overdo it right now, just enjoy your children for a moment. Report

Yes, I struggled to lose weight after my babies. Like you I gained a healthy amount of weight and actually lost it while breastfeeding my babies. My problem began when my youngest (who ate and ate and ate) weaned and I no longer needed the calories for him and my appetite didn't go down. I carried that extra 15 pounds until I started with Sparkpeople 9 months ago. (My baby is 21). I will always have that "baby" tummy pooch. Your tiredness could also be taking care of your little one and the sleep interruptions that come. Remember....when baby sleeps, mommy sleeps! It will help. Report

Amazingly, I did not really have any trouble dropping the weight or getting in shape after my daughter was born. I gained 30 lbs during pregnancy. By the time I was home out of the hospital, I was only 15 lbs heavier than my normal weight. Breastfeeding and walking almost every day, up and down big hills, with my daughter in her stroller melted the weight off in no time and by the time I went to Hawaii 8 months later I was seriously in one of the best shapes of my life. I really credit it all to breast feeding. It burns 500 calories a day, and I did it for 8 months. I didn't get a lot of sleep, and I was back working full time after 3 months. Report

I have a seven week old son, I had problems with my cervix so i was on modified rest the whole pregnancy almost. I worked in a hospital where I was always on my feet, I walked between 6-8 fast miles a day at work until they took me off work after I was six weeks pregnant. I have four kids so with each one I have kept a little baby weight each time, putting me at about 176 before I got pregnant with my last one and had chronic hypertention. I gained 70 pounds which was pretty easy considering for eight months I was on modified rest, was not allowed to exercise, and the last month and a half I was on strict bed rest.

Now that I have had my son it is very depressing all this extra weight on my body, I had a c section for the first time with this baby, so I just got my ok last week to go ahead and start slowly exercising again. I have lost 46 pounds so far, and I have a lot more to go. I get upset about the fact that none of my own clothes fit me, and I currently have no jeans that fit me except my maternity jeans which makes me want to cry:( I am brestfeeding my son as I did with all my babies and I know that is supposed to help some, but I need way more help than that!

I bought a walk at home leslie sansone dvd to start exercising again, I also have an eliptical, and exericise ball and resistance bands that I use for strength training, but getting my stomach muscles back after a c section is not that much fun:) I just hope I am able to lose the weight, I want to feel ok looking in the mirror again. I don't want to look like a super model, I never did, I just want to fit into jeans, and feel comfortable with my body again. Report

I gained 40 pounds of pregnancy weight, and I had gained 5 pounds in the 2 months prior to getting pregnant, due to bad eating habits. Doctors kept telling me I was gaining too quickly during the pregnancy but I knew I wasn't doing anything super-unhealthy, and I was in the gym, working hard, through month 7 of the pregnancy. The first thing I want to say to everyone, especially Serendipity22, is that everyone gains a different amount of weight and it's totally normal. Your body knows how much it needs to create all that baby-making machinery and give you a healthy, beautiful child, and you WILL be able to lose the weight afterwards. You cannot stay skinny at the expense of your baby's health. So don't worry about it!

I went back to taking slow walks 4 days after having my baby, and then was back in the gym with very easy workouts at about 2 weeks out. It took several months to get back to anything approaching the endurance and intensity of pre-pregnancy workouts, but keeping at it steadily, breastfeeding, and eating healthy foods was effective. I was down to within 1 or 2 pounds of my pre-pregnancy weight, but not nearly to pre-pregnancy fitness level or size, by 4 months after having the baby.

Then I returned to my full-time job, and the weight loss stalled. I felt that I had no time or energy to work out, when I wanted to spend all my non-work hours with my new baby! I was not "fit" despite what the scale said and was 2 dress sizes larger than I had been at that weight before. I still had that extra 5 pounds from the pre-pregnancy weight gain, too. I spent 5 months stalled at that level, not working out consistently, then realized that I had actually gained back 1-2 pounds. I didn't want to let weight gain become a downward spiral, so when my sister told me about sparkpeople I joined up and started tracking my calories and workouts.

I had to start waking up at 5:30 in the morning to get the workout in before everyone woke up and before going to my job, but knowing I had to check the boxes on the fitness tracker, and admit to myself all the days I missed the workouts, was great motivation. Also, I realized that I had been overeating when I saw the calories and fat grams recorded every day. Waking up that early is great because you don't miss any time with the baby, who's still asleep. :)

With the help of consistent workouts and increasing intensity of the workouts, I've now lost the "extra" five pounds from pre-pregnancy, and am 4 pounds away from my weight of a few years ago, when I was at my lifetime peak fitness level. So here's the point: having a baby and a full-time job makes it hard to manage your time, but it is possible and you don't need a personal trainer or hours of working out every day - you just need to be patient, consistent and diligent, and don't make excuses not to work out (like I did for 5 months). Don't waste your time going half-heartedly through workouts - once you're recovered from actually having the baby, whenever that is for you (depending on the level of trauma you experienced during the birth), go to the gym regularly and work intensely at your cardio when you do go.

Good luck, ladies! Report

My daughter will be turning two this sunday and I am still having a hard time loosing the pounds. I have lost the inches but the pounds are still on the heavy side. Before i had my daughter i was 143 pounds and i am currently 154. I love working out but my husband thinks that i make it my life so these two weeks i have not worked out at all to please him but now i find my self munchng on sweets and junk food. My favorite thing is running but with work, school, and my baby im just too tired sometimes. I wish i had the money to hire a trainer. My husband doesnt help either, when he tells me he loves me the way i am. I need to work on my eating habits, i know this is were i struggle the most plus i want to feel good about my self. Therefore i need to prioratice my health and fit it into my schedule. Report

I really appreciate this thread... as I too have struggled with post baby body changes. You may laugh, but my last son will be 17 in April. Two C-Sections left me with a visible, vertical gap in my abdominal muscles that all my attempts to close only brought me a navel hernia and a trip to the surgeon. The lack of abdominal strength has created multiple problems for me - lower back problems, bladder incontinence and most of the time I still look like I'm 7 months pregnant - which the incoming gray hair makes gives lie to. I'm really tired of this, but almost two decades of trying and 'expert' advice has gotten me no where. If anyone else has gone through this and successfully regained their muscle tone, let me know how. But if it was through ab crunches, I really can't afford another trip to the surgeon. Report

Hear hear! I am so tired of being inundated with pictures of celebrity moms who are a size 00! I wish I had a 7 figure income, a full time staff of nannies/personal chefs/trainers, and a great plastic surgeon at my beck and call. I felt so pressured after my daughter was born a year ago to be just like them that it drove me into fits of tears on an almost daily basis until my husband pointed out several things:
1) it must be nice to devote 3 hours a day to working out and not worry about who was going to take care of the kid or pay the bills
2) airbrushing was God's gift to Hollywood
3) what kind of life must it be like to have everyone always scrutinizing your every move, outfit, and everything that comes within a foot of mouth. Privacy anyone?
He also told me he was amazed at how much I could accomplish around the house in so little time...and still look smokin' hot! He's seen me at 115 pounds and on up to 178 and he still thinks I'm sexy everyday. [sigh] Knew I married him for a good reason :o)

I want to see more articles like this one that focus on REAL hot mamas--you know who I'm talking about: the ladies who get their butts up at 6 am (or earlier) every day to take care of their families, go to work, cook dinner, pay the bills, get everybody ready for bed, clean the house, go to bed late at night, and still find time to do something for themselves, be it exercise, a hobby, or a bubble bath. We may not be size 00's or even size 4's or 6's, but we wear our 'badges of honor' proudly as we watch our children grow into beautiful and successful people. We need to focus on reality and not the 2% that the media pushes on us.

I personally am grateful that I can focus on my daughter without other people trying to pry into my life with a camera or criticize my every move. Fame has it's own price tag. Imagine how those celebrity moms are feeling...can you imagine what their kids must be feeling!? No thanks! I'm content to be a size 8/10 and have a life where I call the shots; not the media.

One year after my baby girl made her arrival, I'm still losing baby weight. I'm not where I want to be, but at least I can do it in a HEALTHY way and on my own terms. And I'm going to focus on what makes me happy; not what I think will make everyone else happy. Report

I'm pretty sure most of these celeb mom's have nannies and housekeepers and such. If they did all the running and late-nights and stuff that real mom's do they would shed a few pounds without really trying. I blew up like a balloon the first 2 times I was pregnant 125 lbs to over 200 and lived with, you'll never be skinny again. There's weight on both sides of the family and you seem to have inherited it. After the baby was born the weight just fell off, all on it's own, lucky me, and I had a better figure than before, more hip, and with the third I hardly put any on at all. But I went water=skiing for the very first time, just weeks after my first son was born, rode horseback all thru the other 2 pregnancies and just kept right on going after they were born.
Some people just have a tendency to shed weight and others don't. I also think it's a mind frame. I was confident that the weight would disappear and it did. That's why I'm having so much trouble dealing with this sudden weight increase I'm experiencing now, (it's downright scary) and am doing something extra to get rid of it before it gets to be a huge problem.
It's working.......slowly.....but it's working....so don't get depressed with that extra at baby time.....confidence and a little committment (mental and physical) will deal with it. Report

It took me eleven years to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. My dearest son turns eleven on Tuesday, and I am blessed. One of my former neighbors set herself a goal of losing the baby weight in three months; her metabolism and bone structure are different than mine. I am just happy to weigh what I do today. I still have some more weight to lose to reach my SparkPeople goal I set back on July 10, 2008, but I believe that staying the course and not beating myself up on "bad" days is the best policy. A lot of celebrities are no different than spoiled children whose mommies do everything for them at the age of adulthood: someone cooks their meals, someone kicks their butts out of bed each morning to exercise, and someone else takes care of their responsibility-the baby. There are some celebrities who do it themselves, and they have my respect. Take care. Report

How interesting. I just blogged about this very thing today. The feelings are real. And our babies come first. So, after learning about my emotional eating of sweets and replacing it with fruit, and adding in that exercise after I got the healthy food choices down pat (or at least with some consistancy) - I began to see the results and knew that I had achieved it with my health and family in mind. Celebrities and media will always make things look easier - we live in the real world where we understand that image is more that skin-deep and good habits are formed over time. Another thing is that we don't have the resources (babysitting, personal trainers, nurtritionalists, etc.) that many celebrities can affort or have at thier disposal. Report

I feel very strongly about the images that are being supported here. "weeks to get back" "higher standard" you had a baby, sounds like your second. I remember one thing someone told me that seemed foreign "baby the mother" thinking that you are doing anything that is less then best when your plate is so full is wrong. Maybe Heidi is concerned with the fact that her profession has an extremely short shelf life. (I don't think she needs to be wearing mini skirts at her age even if she has the body for it). We all want it all, it just is a case of not all at the same time. Report

I gained about 25 to 30 pounds with my pregnancy. Which is within normal weight gain for be pregnant.

For those who are struggling with this topic who are TTC I would say go to the sister site babyfit.com to have a healthy pregnancy. And I will stress this my weight gain for pregnancy was for me and could not be normal for you. The thing with pregnancy is that your body will change termendously and will tell you what you need. Go with the flow, but remember you are not eating for two.

Those that have had the baby, been there and done that. What I struggle with today is fitting in the time to exercise on top of it all. I try to eat healthy and drink water and have my vitamins. But things will just not snap back into shape where they were. Due to enlarging and then shrinking back. The skin stretched out of shape and that does not go away. That is my biggest challenge. Report

Thanks for writing this!

My husband and I have been married for nearly 1.5 years now and we are considering TTC soon. I've been losing weight for about a year now and I'm still not to my personal goal.

I'm not even pregnant yet and I struggle with the thought of gaining weight for my baby. Then after I notice that I'm feeling that, I feel a tremendous amount of guilt for thinking so selfishly.

I hate that I'm already struggling with this issue and I haven't even conceived yet. Does anyone have any suggestions to help me through this?
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So start brain washing yourself for your children's teen years - when you watch them eat the whole refrigerator and have flat line skin between two hip bone, but your baby bump flab is still hanging with you. Just pat yourself on the back for working on it now, it has been 21 years for me and I'm finally getting the message it is ok to take some time for my fitness. Looking back, after my child reached four we should have just made it a habit to take a 10 minute walk before dinner got started -- on yea I remember the list of school supplies, running to lessons, time is always a challege. Don't fool yourself, the models have personal trainers, chefs, drugs, nannies, and plastic surgeons (I'm guessing that is why Jolie took all the doctors with her to Africa when she had her babe?!?). Report

Every woman is different and our bodies react differently. That being said, I think depending on how fit one is before and during a pregnancy makes a huge difference in how quickly baby weight will come off. Report

OK, I am happy to hear I am not alone and not so crazy. It has actually been 20 months since my daughter was born. I knew that having her at 42 (my first) and being overweight to start with would not be helpful, but my frustration is so high now. I actually only gained 16 lbs. while pregnant and did this without obsessing and giving my body what it needed. Funny, but my whole perspective about food changed because I was focused on growing a healthy baby. After birth I was really ahead of the game, about 10 lbs smaller than before pregnancy. THEN came the depression of adjusting to life with a new baby and staying home for four months with her. I gained back whatever I had lost. I am pretty much at my pre-pregancy weight, but I struggle daily with the changes in my body. Now on top of wanting to lose weight, I struggle with the new shape/flab of my belly and the increased fat I find on my arms, etc. Before, even though I was overweight, I was more fit.

Then I try to take a step back and give myself a break. I am 44 now, work full-time and have a great husband and a great kid. I know in my heart of hearts I will someday be thin again, but I am struggling, like many of you, to come to terms with the fact that I may never have the same body as before the baby, thick or thin.

But is that so bad? Logically, no. Emotionally, yes. Report