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A1DENSMOM SparkPoints: (12,835)
Fitness Minutes: (8,671)
Posts: 82
7/8/12 1:20 P

Again, thank you all!! emoticon

It seems to be getting easier every day. Like I said before, our relationship was bad for a long time. I am feeling better about this every day, as I know that I do not want to be with him, but yes- there still is grieving- for a family broken up, for the 3rd child that I wanted and now won't have, and for losing my best friend.

Today I did 30 minutes cardio and started my morning with oatmeal and strawberries (healthy!). I will be eating better starting today!

You all really don't understand how important your support is to me. Taking the few minutes out of your day to read my post and to respond has made me feel better! emoticon

Thank you,
Niki

ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (139,552)
Fitness Minutes: (209,125)
Posts: 20,651
7/8/12 6:50 A

A1DENSMOM,

I'm sorry to hear that your relationship broke up. I completely understand how you're feeling. On Friday, I was laid off. I worked for that company for 16 years. So, I'm mourning the loss of my job much the same way you're mourning the loss of your relationship. Believe me, it stinks.

But, we need to stay positive. This is a turning point for the both of us. Our outlook now will determine what happens next. If we can stay positive, everything really will turn out okay. You'll need to be productive and proactive. Don't let this relationship hang around your neck like an albatross. It's going to take a few days to adjust to the new situation. So, don't beat yourself up if you don't seem to have motivation. just do the best you can. if the only healthy thing you were to do for yourself today was to drink 8 glasses of water, that's still a step in the right direction.

You can't let this get you down. These things happen to us all. Don't look to the past, look to the future. Do the things you need to do now that will help you be a healthier person later. Take a regular walk. get some exercise, the exercise really does help. I'll be doing that later today.

Just think of this week as a bump on life's highway. It's behind you. gotta keep driving.

emoticon

MAMA_CD Posts: 1,497
7/7/12 6:47 P

emoticon its a tough time, try finding supportive people around you, and here on Sparkpeople. You have so much to deal with now, you don't want to make it worse with dealing with poor health on top of it. Spend some time thinking about what you want to do with your new life now as a single with a healthy body. Watch out for emotional eating. It'll get better, be patient with yourself and make some good choices for yourself, you deserve it.

KYRSTINRO Posts: 945
7/7/12 3:12 A

Back in 2009 I had issues wt my ex-husband. We had an ugly fight on Aug 15, then they kept coming. In mid Nov 2009 we had another awful fight and he said he's gonna look for a place. i didn't believe it or that he would. he did check out a place right on my b-day...but stuck around for Christmas. Dec 27 2009 he was gone, out the door. For me it was a horrible New Year's and up until mid January i hardly ate anything dropping 7 lbs .

Needless to say, at some point i started to get back to somewhat normal. But I didn't gain all the weight back all of a sudden. plus we tried to "get back together".

anyway, we did split up for good. but i did manage to gain from 115 lbs at my lowest after not eating for weeks to 143 lbs in Jan 2011. Which was a lot but not very far for my healthy weight anyway. I gained a bit more but lost it meantime

all i can say is you'll need time to heal and adjust and get back to normal. i'd suggest a gym. i loved to go to the gym - until i had an injury...that is.

and try to stay active, no matter what. you can walk, hike, etc.

the eating part....well, i love to cook but there were times when i settled for crap (fast food). try to visit the farmer's market and cook easy stuff which is yummy.


Edited by: KYRSTINRO at: 7/7/2012 (03:14)
A1DENSMOM SparkPoints: (12,835)
Fitness Minutes: (8,671)
Posts: 82
7/6/12 11:35 P

Thank you both. I think this is the most honest I have been about how I feel so far. I am forcing myself to walk on my treadmill every day, but the eating is not good. I am trying to be better, as of today, but I didn't keep within my limits. I just find it hard to get back on track and feel good about it.

Thank you for the encouragement and for understanding.

BETHS60 Posts: 547
7/6/12 11:22 P

Even if you know it is best in the long term, it is still a loss. It's grief, and it will take time. Be kind to yourself. Reach out to your friends and family. Your body is probably going to want to deal with stress by packing on calories, so prepare with other methods.

Tea helps me when I am under stress, and it is low in calories.

I am sorry you are going through this.

BUBRA007 SparkPoints: (14,384)
Fitness Minutes: (7,426)
Posts: 754
7/6/12 10:40 P

You are in shock, you need to be especially kind to yourself during this transition out of a relationship. Just try to log your food, read articles here, post on the message boards, blog your feelings...keep busy in other words. Set a goal for maybe starting back with an exercise program in 3 days, or a week. Maybe start taking walks in the morning...these are always so cleansing to me mentally. Remember that food is not the answer. I am an emotional eater too, so I know how hard this is for you.

Hugs to you

A1DENSMOM SparkPoints: (12,835)
Fitness Minutes: (8,671)
Posts: 82
7/6/12 10:20 P

I think it has been since February that I have been actively tracking my calories and doing cardio (daily) and the 28-day bootcamp videos daily.

I have lost about 14 lbs. (my goal is 20 lbs.). The problem is, I have lost my drive. My boyfriend of 10 years (the Father of my two children) left me on July 1st. He moved out. Although our relationship has been bad for a long time now and this break up is a relief, I am still heart broken, This all happened so fast. June 16th he told me he was going to look for a place and now he is gone.

Anyway, after he moved out I couldn't eat and I dropped about 3 lbs in just a few days. Now, for the past 2 days I have been eating a lot. I have no self-control. I have no want to eat healthy, which I was doing for months.

I haven't been consistent with my workouts, but I do force myself to do some cardio every day. I have to force myself though. Ugh.

I just need to get back on track and it is hard. Any suggestions?

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