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GABBY2876 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (608)
Posts: 77
5/22/11 12:15 A

I will just apologize for undetailed people like me. I am the bonehead that never notices the changes. I am sure that as long as you hold your head high you will be just fine.

SUPERSYLPH Posts: 1,272
5/20/11 11:32 P

I'm sorry. I'm sure he'll notice soon.

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NHTHMS Posts: 87
5/20/11 8:44 P

What was your reason for losing weight?... to get others to notice of for yourself?.... Sure it's nice when others notice ..but if that's the only reason you're doing it.. it will surely be short lived... you need to do it for you.. gain some self confidence and I'm sure others will notice.

ORANGEMUSE SparkPoints: (3,472)
Fitness Minutes: (1,025)
Posts: 261
5/17/11 9:46 A

Losing weight is a very touchy subject. Sometimes when people aren't sure, they usually have the tact not to comment. Try saying things to your friends like, "I'm feeling so great and have so much more energy now!!!" That opens the door for comments and it doesn't sound like bragging.

HELPEET Posts: 21
5/17/11 9:20 A

I'm guilty of not noticing too. A friend of mine recently lost 60 lbs in a 5 month time span and I think it took 30 or more before I noticed. Unfortunately, I feel she took it too far and no longer looks healthy on the other end of the spectrum. I do feel that a positive comment never goes astray even if it is not directly related to the weight loss (eg the new lipstick, lol).

To some of you who have commented about losing your baby weight and not having anyone say anything: I wonder if it is because people expect you to lose the baby weight? Or is it because there is already so much pressure to lose after pregnancy and they don't want you to think you aren't doing enough? I have been through that and got one comment through my sister-in-law that my brother had noticed my baby fat loss but he wouldn't tell me directly. Hopefully that won't be the case after this baby is born!

Either way, you ladies are doing great! Keep it up!

VERA_MOM Posts: 2,604
2/2/11 8:31 A

I don't make comments about losing weight unless I know for sure that someone has been trying to. I might say something like, "Wow, you look amazing!" or "You've really seemed to be happier lately" (because IME, people who are taking better care of themselves ... the mood follows) "I love that top, is it new? It looks great on you!" Weight loss is such a touchy subject ... those types of comments will open the door for a good conversation and leaves the ball in the other person's court and whether they want to say something about it or not.

The important thing is that YOU are happy with your loss! Thankfully for me my dh is super supportive (sounds like yours is, too!) and he's great about making sure I know he thinks I'm beautiful (whether I'm overweight or not) - sure, it would feel great if other people think you look great, too, but you have to be content with what you're doing regardless of what other people think. Otherwise you risk backsliding down the road.

You're doing great! Try and focus on that.

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Edited by: VERA_MOM at: 2/2/2011 (08:32)
GOOSIEMOON SparkPoints: (171,880)
Fitness Minutes: (90,628)
Posts: 6,044
2/1/11 11:22 P

Somtimes people aren't sure, so they don't comment. You're doing this for you, and so that's what really matters. Keep going!

JULIESDREAM Posts: 752
1/27/11 8:13 P

I lost 70 lbs and no one said a thing. I was so discouraged because I could see the results in my clothes and my face. I think people were a little scared to say anything. I don't know if they just wanted to wait until I lost more to be sure but honestly it is never offensive if someone asks you if you've lost weight. Don't give up they have probably already noticed but perhaps are hesitant to say anything.

KIPPERKATE Posts: 56
1/27/11 2:46 P

Just keep going. Your husband and you are the only ones that matter =)

IZZYS_MOM Posts: 100
1/27/11 8:42 A

I never comment on other's weight because I hate when people notice my rollercoaster weight gains and losses. Maybe others feel the same as me. If I really wanted to reach out I'd simply say, "You look great!" Don't take it personal, people probably notice but don't want to mention it.

MOE122 SparkPoints: (6,258)
Fitness Minutes: (3,535)
Posts: 273
1/26/11 3:35 P

the same thing is happening to me i went to a party sat. with my hole family and not one person said anything i thought almost 25 pounds was a big but that day i did not think so
i had to remember that my heath noticed
and that's what i should care about!!!!
keep up the good work!!!

ICANTODAY Posts: 975
1/21/11 1:58 P

Congratulations on your weight loss and being healthier!

I have to say, if you're this bummed out about other people not noticing, you may need to take a look at, and possible rearrange, your priorities. You are doing this for you, right? Because if you're doing it for everyone else, it's not going to stick.

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CIENCIASMOM Posts: 88
1/19/11 11:49 P

I'm sorry your not getting alot of comments, I'm sure it will pick up the more weight you lose. Some people wont comment for fear of offending. Others just don't realize that their lack of comments can be just as offending.

My hubby's comment resulted in me not speaking to him for two days. I commented to him that I had finally hit my pre-pregnancy weight from our youngest and his response was "I noticed. Hey, you know, the last time you lost weight you got pregnant right away, maybe it'll happen again!" Now, I'd love to have one more child but for that to be his response to my weight loss kind of hurt.

Anyways, congrats on your weightloss and keep going!

GEOCACHEAZ Posts: 745
1/17/11 10:56 A

Yes- its a bummer...people will notice when you gain 13 pounds but it doesn't work the other way around. Sometimes its the way we dress...I for one tend to wear shirts that cover my belly. I was looking at pictures on the computer and because of the baggy shirts- I still looked big. Flaunt you success!

HEALTHYNEWPAIGE Posts: 550
1/16/11 3:57 P

People who see you on a daily basis might not notice change as much as people who haven't seen you in a while. Even though it's nice to have the people around us giving us encouraging comments, I find support here on SP, when I look in the mirror, and when I look at my scale. Good job on your weight loss and keep up the good work! emoticon

Edited by: HEALTHYNEWPAIGE at: 1/16/2011 (15:58)
IFFUR77 Posts: 519
1/16/11 1:31 P

don't let others decide how you should feel about all your great accomplishments
j~

LBRYSON26 Posts: 1,167
1/15/11 9:19 P

Most important you notice! emoticon

TRACYMEAD Posts: 29
1/12/11 10:58 A

I came searching for a post on this topic, because I am having some similar issues as have been posted. My husband and friends have been a great support, as have many people on my team at work. However, there are a few people that do seem to fall into that jealous boat and they have been bringing me down, so thank you all for reminding me to focus on my goals and not be bothered by those that try to sabotage us for becoming healthier!

RONNYGIRL39 SparkPoints: (12,964)
Fitness Minutes: (13,219)
Posts: 246
1/1/11 10:12 A

No one said anything until I lost about 30lbs.. Keep going you will get noticed sooner or later. It will give you a little boost when someone finally does notice.. Hang in there..

PRESHA811 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (2,801)
Posts: 573
12/31/10 10:13 A

Maybe you hide your weight really well. That's not such a bad thing! I'm sort of the same way - people are surprised when I tell them how much I weigh because they think I must weigh much less than that. Maybe a few more pounds in everyone will notice!

MOMTO3CUTEBOYS Posts: 603
12/31/10 12:19 A

Don't let it get you down, just keep on going! :) Sometimes people don't say anything due to jealousy. I'm guilty, my cousin lost 115 pounds and I never said anything to her until recently. Now that I've started my own weight loss jounery and she's now one of my big supporters. People will notice, just give it time. I'm heavier and I think it will take a little longer for people to actually notice a difference in me. Hang in there!!!

SHAREBEAR1963 Posts: 1,778
12/20/10 9:48 A

I think people do notice, but often don't say anything. I'm not sure why, but I think sometimes, people don't understand that recognition is the best form of encouragement.

Just remember, you are doing it for you!!!!

BLUEHERON2C Posts: 2,403
12/19/10 7:05 P

Try losing 116 pounds over the last year and your family says nothing. Hubby is only support and he's so wonderful!! I've moved past the family thing, after all I'm doing this for my health not for anyone else.

ESTERRL Posts: 86
12/18/10 7:36 P

emoticon KISSFAN1 35 lbs. emoticon emoticon I've lost 27 lbs. but, as, I shared earlier most of my friends only noticed when I gained weight. Now, friends or family who haven't seen me in awhile say that I look good. I do my best to stay healthy! I've maintained my weight over the years with SP. emoticon It's nice to get compliments, but, you know that you did your part & that is what matters the most with all your support groups too. emoticon emoticon emoticon

Edited by: ESTERRL at: 12/18/2010 (19:38)
KISSFAN1 Posts: 6,256
12/18/10 2:22 P

I've lost 35 pounds and there are still friends who haven't seen me in a while who haven't commented or seemed to notice.

I am only 5' 4" tall so I think it would show faster on me than a taller person. I think sometimes they have to be blind not to notice, LOL.

Cashiers for some reason seem to notice it more than anyone and will point it out before friends do. It's crazy and maddening sometimes! I'm not wearing baggy clothes around my friends either and only two friends have commented and noticed, the rest don't say anything. I even had one friend act like I was lying when another friend commented (I had lost 25 pounds at that point) on my weight loss and I told her how much I had lost.

Talk about a slap in the face to be told by one friend that I looked great and another who was right there and heard act like I was lying and looking at my body like it was untrue even though at the time my bathing suit that I ALWAYS wore was baggy as could be.

ESTERRL Posts: 86
12/4/10 8:06 P

emoticon emoticon It is very frustrating when people do not notice when you have lost weight. I'm 5'2" so, people have made comments when I gain weight most of my life. So, you know that you are doing a wonderful healthy lifestyle change even if others don't say anything. WAY TO GO! emoticon emoticon emoticon

Edited by: ESTERRL at: 12/4/2010 (20:06)
AMELIAEARNHARDT Posts: 59
11/18/10 11:27 P

When I had my third son, I weighed like 210 I think. I know I was over 200. I gained lots of weight with all my babies. After he was born I joined sparkpeople and the weight started melting off. I went from 210 to 142 and not one single person every said a word about it. Yeah, it was frustrating. I was always wondering how they could NOT notice! It is weird because two years before that I lost 15 pounds when my husband deployed and I had three people comment on my weight loss. *shrugs*

LINDAJL3 SparkPoints: (20,886)
Fitness Minutes: (24,071)
Posts: 463
11/18/10 9:51 P

Just a little update from my last post, four people in the last two days have noticed! It's so nice to see all my hard work finally paying off, it took 24.5 pounds but at least it's starting to show. I think it probably helped that I finally went out and bought a few things that actually fit me properly.
So go out and treat yourselves to a good fitting new outfit and people will soon start to see the great changes taking place!

LINDAJL3 SparkPoints: (20,886)
Fitness Minutes: (24,071)
Posts: 463
11/18/10 9:50 P

Just a little update from my last post, four people in the last two days have noticed! It's so nice to see all my hard work finally paying off, it took 24.5 pounds but at least it's starting to show. I think it probably helped that I finally went out and bought a few things that actually fit me properly.
So go out and treat yourselves to a good fitting new outfit and people will soon start to see the great changes taking place!

WOLFYJGIRL SparkPoints: (1,657)
Fitness Minutes: (355)
Posts: 91
11/15/10 9:24 A

I agree with the others. People that have not seen you in a while will notice. I know its tough and the encouragement is needed, but thats why you have us! :)

STACI_HEREFORME Posts: 450
11/12/10 11:22 A

I don't expect comments from people I see on a regular basis. They see the change gradually so they don't notice. Co-workers will comment on how well I'm doing, and how they should be doing the same. But not so much on weight loss.

For people I have not seen in a while though, I like to get comments. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. I figure some just don't notice those details, and maybe others don't want to say anything because they're conscious of changes they need to make - but are putting off.

TERWANTSTOLOSE SparkPoints: (17,302)
Fitness Minutes: (14,727)
Posts: 260
11/11/10 11:59 A

I've lost 13 lbs as well. I wore a new outfit last week and my hubby noticed how I've lost. I saw my mother later that day and I asked her if she could tell and she said no .. it broke my heart .. she's always after me to lose weight and now when I am I got no enouragement .. very frustrating .. I think I'll have to lost 50 lbs before my mom notices .. ugh!

ALECIA0823 Posts: 446
11/8/10 7:41 P

I agree with all, it's frustrating. I'm looking forward to holidays. My in-laws always notice if I've lost weight, although my own family doesn't always notices. Crazy!

MCA7828 SparkPoints: (2,364)
Fitness Minutes: (4,456)
Posts: 25
11/8/10 12:52 P

It is frustrating when no one notices but I have to chuckle at the thought sometimes because maybe they don't notice the weight loss but they notice SOMETHING'S different about you.
About a week ago a friend told me "I'm trying to figure out what's different about you. Oh I know! It's your makeup!" I just laughed and said "Yup! Must be that new lipstick." emoticon


LISSIE88 Posts: 635
11/8/10 11:53 A

It is frustrating. Sometimes wearing the clothes that once hid tummies, butts, thighs, etc. still hide the new figure. That could be why no one seems to notice. See if maybe a new outfit that shows off your new figure will draw attention to the weigh loss.

HONEYFLOWER43 Posts: 1,420
11/8/10 8:37 A

believe me people will start noticing! emoticon

ELLEN0407 Posts: 2,037
11/8/10 7:51 A

the same way ppl don't really notice if you gained about 10lbs they don't really notice when you lose it. i think when it gets to about 20 ppl will notice although i have a friend who never comments on such things because she thinks it implies that she thought you needed to lose weight. (oh course she is thin) all that really matters is your spouse and you. if you are both happy, case closed

LINDAJL3 SparkPoints: (20,886)
Fitness Minutes: (24,071)
Posts: 463
11/7/10 2:44 P

I can totally relate! I've lost 20 lbs since the first of Sept. We were at a party for my great-neice and I hadn't seen any one on that side of the family till the middle of Oct (about -15 lbs then) and not one person noticed. I was so disappointed, I was so sure someone would have noticed since I was so much bigger the last time they saw me. A couple people have noticed lately but I find everyone is commenting on how long my hair is getting, not that I'm losing weight. My DH says he thinks they just notice something different with my appearance and can't quite put their finger on what it is. DH notices everyday so at least I have that!
Maybe at 30 pounds it will be more noticeable...

RONEAL09 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (2,325)
Posts: 19
11/5/10 12:38 P

Hi everyone! I'm new here. :)

I think sometimes people don't want to say anything because they may feel awkward. I do agree how frustrating it is though. After I had my son, I lost 60 pounds and anytime I see my husband's family, or even my own mom, they go straight for the baby and never say anything. I even try to work it in the conversation sometimes (fishing for a compliment) and it'll go over their heads.

I think the important thing is that you are happy with your progress and feel good about yourself. :)

On the other side of this, yesterday I ran into some friends that I haven't seen since I was pregnant 5 months ago and one of them said, "Renee, you look... helathy..." Really? Am I the only one who finds that a bit insulting. I mean, it's not like I was anorexic and then was at a healthy weight. I was real big and I lost a bit of weight but I'm still a big girl... Hehe. She was smiling so I couldn't be mad. I don't think she meant it that way. I just thought it was funny.

RUNANDRUN SparkPoints: (27,373)
Fitness Minutes: (16,669)
Posts: 1,978
11/1/10 11:59 P

It's a bummer, isn't it? Keep up the good work, though!

SHUPER5 Posts: 618
11/1/10 9:07 P

Same here!No one has said anything.Yes it is very frustrating but DO NOT GIVE UP!!! emoticon emoticon

LALA0123 Posts: 601
11/1/10 12:17 P

soon people will notice it took 18 pounds before i started getting compliments!

BUDIES31771 SparkPoints: (52,912)
Fitness Minutes: (47,005)
Posts: 1,487
11/1/10 10:07 A

It will happen, all of a sudden people will start to notice the change you have made, and in one day you will get 2 to 3 complements, where a week earlier you didn't get any. Just keep up the good work, all that matters is how you feel!

HAWTLIKEME SparkPoints: (21,191)
Fitness Minutes: (21,482)
Posts: 888
10/30/10 11:28 A

I agreed that people who see you regularly won't see the transition until it becomes more dramatic and sometimes not even then. The gradual nature of weight loss with Spark People is the healthiest way to do it, but people have lots of time to get used to each little change without even noticing them.

Just wait until you see some people who haven't seen you for a while. THAT's when you'll have some fun. I'm running into people now who say they almost didn't recognize me. I LOVE the double takes and staring. You'll see, it will come. Enjoy the new attention from your DH.

BECOMINGDEB Posts: 4,274
10/28/10 7:23 P

I agree with the PP that just because people don't say anything doesn't mean they don't notice. Then again, sometimes when people see you every day and see that slow progression of weight loss, it sometimes takes a while to register that it is different. I know someone I went to church with weekly lost about 50 pounds total before I really realized that she was losing weight. I'm kind of slow, lol. It's just that one day I took a good look at her and thought, "Wow, she is skinnier than the last time I noticed!" But I don't know exactly when I even said anything to her.

_UMAMI_ Posts: 6,769
10/27/10 12:01 A

I'm tall, and it takes me losing 20 pounds or more for anyone to even comment. (Yeah, see how it's easy to gain?!)

I'd suggest taking your measurements. When no one else notices, it can be a thrill to see the tape measure move.

People WILL notice. Don't give up, just keep setting up carrots to move you forward.

TREASURINGLIFE Posts: 2,101
10/20/10 1:13 P

You're doing great, so be proud of that! And keep in mind that people may not be commenting because they don't want to say something that is potentially offensive. You know? Like "Oh wow - have you lost weight?" and you end up saying "No - why? - do you think I need to?" It happens. And it makes a lot of people just keep quiet until they hear you make a comment about losing weight...then they feel it's safer to let you know they've noticed. :)

Keep up the great work!

LAINGMOM Posts: 423
10/20/10 1:10 P

The only people who comment are those who know I am trying. Very discouraging! Especially cause I think at 17 pounds less it is starting to show. I am down a clothing size.


ASHLEYMAY3 SparkPoints: (2,630)
Fitness Minutes: (3,440)
Posts: 37
10/20/10 12:32 P

I have that problem too! Kind of makes you feel like you aren't doing as well as you think you are!!

FIVEXBLESSED SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (574)
Posts: 9
10/20/10 8:55 A

I find it very frustrating that I have lost a total of 13 lbs and NO ONE has even commented. Naturally my husband does, because he is always hugging me and can feel the difference. I keep waiting for that...wow have you lost weight? Maybe when I hit the 20 mark someone will notice. Anyone else have this problem?

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