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My son isn't talking



 
 
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KAMILLAVIRAG1
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5/30/12 7:27 A

Till age 3 you'll be advised to just wait and see. On top of that (minus the worry) if you can (have time, afford it etc) take him to a neurologist, maybe a a speech therapist too, they can give you tips but also they would notice if something is slightly different.

Speech therapy is fun, even if is not needed, quite useful. Physical therapy is even more fun and useful - to make more neurological connections in the brain. Also, when started early it's really effective or with a kid that in the long run turns out didn't need it would still be hours of fun together.

I was trying to do these on my own because GP and nurses/family told me not to worry for years. (everyone said the same thing, oh, he'll come around, my son did the same, and look, now he doesn't shut up etc). True enough, in order to achieve anything with the speech games he had to mature to a stage that other kids reach earlier in their lives. But now that he's wiling, it's really cool to see him develop - though I see how much he still needs to learn. Finally I managed to persuade the official body too (at the age of 4,5), so he gets professional threapy once a week while I continue working (playing) with him at home.

I too waited because there are so many stories of kids coming round and I didn't know otherwise. But when he was 3 and still had a limited vocab, I started to look for ways to improve that. He is so clever and intelligent, I felt sorry that he can't communicate his ideas with the world. At first he didn't want to cooperate (for various reasons, psychological, physical, neurological) but by age 4 he was willing and happy. Only, he's missed 2.5 years of practice and even though he's developing sometimes at a greater pace, he is still very noticeably behind.

If I could start again, or if I had another child, I'd take him to a general neurological checkup and do the fun activies regardless. It can't do any harm.

Edited by: KAMILLAVIRAG1 at: 5/30/2012 (07:27)


FENWAYGIRL18
Posts: 5,830
5/27/12 12:36 P

Don't worry about it , kids progress on their own schedule not the doctors not your friends kids or your neighbors, he's listening he's saying the little things don't sweat it. believe there will come a day when you say omg will u please be quiet for 5 minutes and let mommy's brain have a rest hahahahaha
My son didn't say much either at first now he's 15 yrs old and we can't ever get a word in edgewise hahahaha



OLEARYD26
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5/21/12 11:34 P

My son is 31mths and still not saying very many words. He is very intelligent in all other areas but he just doesn't say much. We have heard him say thank you, he says OH MAN! and you hear some other words but the words don't flow consistantly. Anyone else's child doing anything similiar?



TJANDJESS
Posts: 649
5/21/12 11:03 P

Since he's starting to attempt making sounds he's on the right track for his age. Some kids talk early and others wait a long time to speak even though they understand everything



JADOMB
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5/17/12 3:15 P

Neither of my kids had any problems in their development but did come around at different times. On the other hand, some of our friend's kids were lagging and sadly kept comparing them to ours. This concerned me since sometimes they would do it in front of their kids. We would keep telling them not to worry since all the books I was reading gave a pretty wide range to many childhood developments. So kids just do better or start younger than others, but once they start getting past the 2 and 3 year age they all were talking up a storm and running all over the place.

I'm sure there are many reasons for these variations, but for the most part it's just not their time yet. But that should not stop anyone from working very hard with their child to help them do better. There are many books out there that one can pick up to help parents with their children in all aspects. I have stacks of them and it helped me to understand all their stages of development and things I could to help them along. Keep the faith.



SKINNYANGEL25
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5/17/12 10:07 A

aww dont worry! my daughter didnt talk for a while either, she didnt say mommy for a while either, and I was a bit sad as well. But now she will be three in july, and boyyyyy she will NOT stop talkiing!! So dont give up hope! emoticon



ELOWDER5
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5/16/12 11:28 A

I would not worry about it. My son had a speech delay and did not start fully talking until he was three. My son would say a word and I would get really excited and then he would not say the dang word again. My son talks just fine now. He's 14 and sometimes I wish he would talk a little less! LOL!! Your son will come around. Just keep a watchful eye on it. I was able to get my son into speech therapy at around the age of three and it was completely paid for by the school district. If he does not start to get better call your school district office to see what they offer for speech therapy.



SARAIAB
Posts: 61
5/16/12 8:30 A

I agree... at his age you shouldn't fret. I had one boy that talked up a storm by 18 months, but the next one didn't come along til he was 2 1/2 almost 3. The second one I was concerned about at around 2 so I took him to a speech pathalogist (it was free through our school district - just went right to the school).

First she evaluated him and we learned that he had a highly function little noggin' and he just wasn't coming out of his shell. He was still on target for his age speech wise (he said about 10 words pretty regularly). But she gave us some tips to encourage his speech. We would make words seem more attainable to him, and once he tried them, we'd re-say them the correct way. ie:

for "Balloon" we would say "Boon" and when he mastered that or repeated we'd say "Yeah good job BALLOON". And then continue to pronounce correctly in sentence. The key here is that you give them a "shortcut" and after they repeat it, you continue saying the word correctly.

After doing this it gave him some confidence and he just took off.



WITCHSTORMLILY
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5/7/12 5:38 P

Just relax. :) 18 months is far too early to start worrying. If you start telling people you're worried, you're going to get other people telling you they heard this and that, or a parent of an autistic child telling you to rush him/her to get tested. My first child (who's 9 now) was talking in sentences shortly after 1 year.. my second, said next to nothing until he was just over 2. He's coming up on three years now, and I can't get him to stop talking. I took him to see two pediatricians and had a consultation with a speech therapist. Turns out he's fine - didn't bother talking because he didn't have to. I take care of a high functioning autistic boy, and I think because of that (and the fact that his mother was always comparing the two, and telling me straight out that my boy was autistic), I was seeing red flags where there weren't any.



MSWFHSPARK
Posts: 34
5/7/12 11:33 A

I think it is too soon to worry...encourage him to ask for things and just keep talking to him....sounds like he is ok and being relaxed around him will help.



SUZIEQUE77
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3/31/12 8:35 A

I happened to see this topic because there is so much in the news lately about Autism. While I know this is very real for some children, I feel that some professionals are biased and too quick to label children with something. I think the real reason there is more autism diagnosis in recent years is because kids with the same characteristics would have been considered "normal" in years past.

I think we need to be more accepting of "differences" in children. Some are more active, some are late talkers, etc.

Of course there is a fine line, and as parents we don't want to not get help for our child if he/she needs it, and it is available.

I would definitely not have a child evaluated at 13 or 18 months if he or she speaks a little and acts normal in every other way.

My oldest daughter only said "Mamma" when she was a year old. We had a play date with her same age cousin and his mother said he was saying all kinds of words. I couldn't understand anything he said, but I still remember that day and "wondered" about my child.

Well her kid turned out normal and average but mine turned out very gifted, brilliant, valedictorian of her class, and now has a Ph.D. and works at MIT.

My other children seemed to follow similar talking patterns...a word or two at one year old.

Now I have grand children and my grandson is 3.5 years old and actually does have a speech issue and is getting speech therapy and it is helping a lot! Some people preach that you must get help early, but I don't really think everyone should push the panic button at under two years old. I think some that test kids are biased and predispositioned to diagnose something and that is where the issue lies. I think that the parents intuition is often as good as the evaluator's opinion. With that said, as a parent or grandparent, if it is not your first child so you have something to compare to, and something really seems wrong, then yes, get an evaluation.

My grandson has come a long way in just a few months and is communicating well, but mostly only those close to him will understand him because his pronounciation is not great at this point, for a lot of words. What bugs me now is that he is absolutely getting what he needs: speech therapy (plus we all work with him and encourage him) but we still hear outsiders constantly suggesting he needs further evaluation for autism.

Why? He is a very loving little boy, loves playing with other kids, has a great imagination and there are no other issues other than the delayed speech. Yet I have a strong sense that some "evaluators" would look hard to find other signs of autism and would put him on the autism spectrum.



MISSHEATHER77
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3/30/12 9:22 A

My husband didn't talk until age 4. Now he talks non-stop. Do not compare your child with other kids. You and he/she will be happier.



DOWNEASTSUNRISE
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3/27/12 11:28 A

just keep an eye on it... soon I bet he'll be talking up a storm!



MARYA81
Posts: 192
3/23/12 10:27 P

every child takes their time and talks when they're ready. My daughter is 3 years and still doesnt speak in complete sentences. I had her checked by the speech pathologist and was told since we speak 2 languages at home, it will take time to pick up everything. Dont worry just yet! He will talk when he's ready :)



ICASSABLANCA
Posts: 15
3/22/12 10:31 P

I'm also a speech therapist, like someone else who answered below and she is absolutely right.
Do wait until the child is 2 years old, maybe a little older. I work with children aged 0-5 in a clinic, and unless it is feeding difficulties or something more specific (like special needs children e.g. Downs), we don't tend to work with children until they are over 2 years old, maybe 2 and a half - on delayed language.

Keep up the language stimulation and exposure!



WILDFLOWER521
Posts: 784
3/22/12 4:14 P

I know you've heard this before, but, don't worry.
When your child is ready, he'll start talking and you wont be able to get him to stop.

I have three kids. Ages 11, 4, and 22 months.

My two boys started early on talking but my daughter (22 months) is still trying to get the hang of it. I can coaxe her into saying some words like cat, dog, ball. But her 3 favorite words are hi, bye and more. She will say mama and dada if she feels like it.

I have to try to make sure my 2 older kids don't talk for her and to let her figure it out herself.
Believe it or not, she has chosen to hum words instead of speak them. I think she just likes the tickle that it makes in her throat and on her lips.

It sounds like your son is off to a good start. Just make sure you don't pressure him too much because then he'll just get frustrated. Whenever he points to things tell him what the object is and if possible, let him hold it while you tell him what it is. Repition is key.

He'll catch on when he's ready.
Keep up the good work. You're doing great.



TARATHEVEGAN
Posts: 30
3/14/12 11:00 A

I'm an early childhood educator and have also worked with children with autism and I don't think you should worry at this point. Children oftentimes don't start speaking until right around 2 years. Your child is trying to communicate verbally with you. Assuming he also tries to communicate with you in other ways (hugs, looks at you, plays with you, etc) you have absolutely nothing to worry about. He sounds developmentally typical. :-)



1CRAZYDOG
Posts: 37,304
3/13/12 2:23 P

Boys do tend to talk later, too. Good luck!!



JENNY_BILLOT
Posts: 1,634
3/13/12 1:42 P

So he just turned 18 months and "says " a lot more. Plus he signs a lot and knows a lot of what I say. He understands when I ask him questions and "communicates" where I can understand him. At his 18 month checkup his pediatrician was concerned he wasn't talking more and suggested speech therapy but I have no intentions of taking him. I think he's fine. :)



1CRAZYDOG
Posts: 37,304
11/27/11 11:29 A

Hope that by now the speech issue has been addressed for you! Reading this obviously well after it was posted.

Just want to say that with my DS (adopted from Korea @ 6-1/2 mths), speech was an issue. He didn't walk till he was 13 mths. -- that was alright. But I did have him evaluated. He did end up getting speech therapy and it really did help him.

Now when I look back on it, for HIM that was probably an early sign of his ADHD. Speech delays can happen with that. And definitely a product of his hearing Korean for the first 6-1/2 mths. of his life.

Wishing you success!





TAUNIAD
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11/26/11 1:24 P

It is very normal, Some babies are more physical and some are more verbal. They get there eventually. Enjoy this time, because pretty soon you will have non stop questions thrown at you. emoticon



PEGSTOLZ
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11/20/11 2:32 A

He sounds perfectly normal to me! I had 3 kids and now have 1 grandson who is 11 mos. Girls do usually talk a little sooner and it is sometimes easier to understand them. I know that I could not understand my own son at that age, either, but one of my aunts visited, and she was able to understand more words right away, like juice or items he wanted. Have you tried reading to him and just pointing at the pictures, naming items, maybe talking about those in relation to what you did that day, or describing them? He may not say anything, but he will most likely take it all in!!! Then, one day, he'll point or touch those same pictures and say the words too. He might like short rhymes, also with the pictures.
I was a music therapist, and worked often with young children, both "normal" and with special needs. I found that books, repetitive songs with plenty of sound effects, animal sounds, nonsense syllables, nursery rhyme songs, simple motions, etc. were so much fun for all kinds of kids! Be sure you don't always just use a recording, but sing to and with him while he's in your lap and facing you, in the car, etc. If you don't know the songs, listen to some with him and then gradually pick up one or two. Most kids that age LOVE just a few animals in "Old MacDonald Had a Farm", (usually they like the cow, sheep, dog, duck, and snake!) the Itsy Bitsy Spider, the Wheels on the bus, etc. just be sure not to do too many verses at once. Let him fill in the blanks on that - he won't sing the entire thing but will "moo" along with you, do some of the spider climbing, windshield wipers etc. until later on, much later! Then he will eventually sing more of the song.
Another "trick" I used to have to get very young or special needs children to make sounds and words, was to use all kinds of props and a variety of textured objects. Be careful that he does not put anything dangerous in his mouth, but as long as you are vigilant while using these, you can try puppets, soft toys, toys that make pleasant sounds, a slide whistle, harmonica, xylophone toy, drum, shakers, hula hoops, balls, bubbles, age-appropriate art supplies, pots and pans, interesting objects you might find outside like feathers, seaweed, shells, etc. - remember not to worry but to talk about those things, name them, explore them and play! Soon he will be talking A LOT! Have fun!



TRUCKERWIFE2
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11/19/11 8:18 P

As a parent with a child with Asperger's ( a mild form of autism) I agree with the speech therapist. I live in Idaho and in many states the Health Department has testing for early child development. My son is 26 and was very delayed. They really start looking at speech issues around 18 months and 2 years. Keep an eye on him. I took classes when he was 4 to encourage speech growth. The one my son loved was my describing what he was doing and what I was doing. "you are picking up the blue block." Talk and read to him. As he gets older if things don't progress as well as they should; get him checked out. Let your gut be your guide. I went through several professionals who told me he would snap out of it. It took many years of speech therapy and hard work to snap out of it.
Remember. It is early now. Watch and be patient. If he doesn't improve in the next year or 2 get him help. My son talks well now and you can't tell he has had severe speech issues.



FITKIZ
Posts: 748
11/16/11 12:01 P

As a mother of three, I found that my two oldest responded well when I named everything they pointed at. After a while it became a game, then we added a mimic component. My 3 year old still mixes her "K" and "T" sounds on occasion and that sort of thing, but her vocabulary and sentence structure are gaining on the curve for 'normal. Understanding came first for my kids, then the actual saying. If you're really concerned, ask your pediatrician. ALWAYS ask your pediatrician your concerns, your doctor should be available through e-mail or by phone for this sort of question. Doctors, in general, are generally in the profession because they care and want to help. Most will tell you that they'd rather deal with dozens of 'silly worries' every day than miss something relevant because you were afraid to ask.



CCAR414
Posts: 66
10/24/11 10:07 P

I am a speech-language pathologist- your child seems to be typical right now with expressive language according to developmental norms, does your child understand more than he can produce? If so, that's normal, our receptive language develops sooner than the expressive language, so if you name an object, he will be able to point to it or go get it before he will be able to verbally name it. If you find he can't follow very basic commands then that might be an issue. Also, some sounds are harder to acquire than others, like "b" "d" "m" are going to be produced sooner than "s" "r" and "j"- based on the child's anatomical features- you will see a lot of phonological processes like you describe for "ki" for "kitty", that's weak syllable deletion and it's normal in really young talkers! These phonological processes go away over time, but will remain in children with disorders. By two years, the child should have about 50 words, and simple sentences, if you don't see that by two, I would see a speech therapist. Boys are at a slight disadvantage for language development, but if you feel like he is not making progress, then it doesn't hurt to have him screened/eval'd. If you really want to give him a leg up on development, I would name/describe everything you are doing, use adult language structures (end the baby-talk), spend lots of time communicating to your child- even during bath time or driving the child to daycare, use every opportunity to speak with your child and immerse him in language, it works! One other tip is that some parents will enable their child to point to objects and just give it to them without requiring them to use words, try to encourage the child to use words as he gets older. You can google devlopmental norms for speech and language, sound development norms, and phonological processes to understand a little better about typical vs. atypical development. HTH!

Edited by: CCAR414 at: 10/24/2011 (22:16)


MRSDG2008
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10/16/11 4:21 P

If he seems frustrated by an inability to communicate, then perhaps bring it up with your ped if you are still concerned. With that being said, 13 months is not really a cause to be concerned. My daughter is 13 months today, and just had her 12 month appointment last week. She seems to be at the same point (with her language) developmentally as your son, and the ped didn't seem the least bit concerned. She asked if my daughter is babbling (she is) and told me that she is right on point and to continue encouraging language. I hope this helps a bit with your concerns, but as another poster said, if you have concerns, there is no harm in voicing them to your ped,



ANDILH
Posts: 1,040
10/16/11 12:26 P

13 months isn't an age where a child will have a full vocabulary. If he's trying to speak, then that's a good sign. Encourage different sounds, even babbling is a precursor to real speech. Most children start picking up vocabulary about 2 years old. I have a class of 2.5-3.5 year olds and only a few have really great vocabularies. Just keep talking to him, without using baby talk. He probably does understand most of what you say. If you think he's more desperate to communicate try teaching him baby sign. I've had kids as young as 7 months be able to successfully communicate their needs via sign language.
Sometimes kids just don't have anything to say. I have a 30 month old in my class right now who never says anything, but when you sit down with him he's got an age appropriate vocabulary. He simply doesn't want to talk in a large group. His dad is the same way (he rarely actually talks to us). Kids all develop in their own way, and yes some need help, but speech takes time.



NAVYWIFE1107
Posts: 279
10/11/11 10:30 A

Voice your concern to the doctor. My son is almost 4 and kinda talking now. He has been talking more this year. While each child has different progresses- any concerns should be brought up.



SINCITY914
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10/9/11 7:15 P

My 3yr old daughter is currently in speech therapy now. I got tired of hear other people telling me not to worry about it. If your this concerned set up an appointment with your childs pediatrician and if you dont like what they have to say get a second opinon.
Good luck :)



_UMAMI_
Posts: 6,732
10/8/11 11:09 P

My oldest wasn't a big talker, but he was reading chapter books by age 5 and could read handwriting upside down by then as well! Now he's in a "gifted" middle school.

I think he wasn't talking b/c he could communicate w/out saying a lot, or was just busy observiing. He didn't really start talking more until age 2, a bit after his brother was born.

If you are really concerned, see your pediatrician, but each child is different, and boys (I think), in particular, can develop more slowly as far as vocabulary goes.

My "late talker" tested at college level for all reading skills last year in 5th grade. *shrug*
DON'T SWEAT IT!


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ZORBS13
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10/4/11 5:43 A

My son is 18 months and says 2-3 words that are real words, and maybe 2-3 more that are his language that I understand.

Generally, doctors don't worry until a child is WELL past the milestone and in combination with other missed milestones.



SPARKY070476
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10/3/11 8:41 P

My youngest is 27 months and only says a few words. We're a bilingual household (Spanish and English). My older kids were a bit slower to form words too. Your child is only 13 months, so don't be worried. If he seems frustrated about not being able to articulate what he wants, try sign language. It's really easy to pick up the basics.





KMAMA23
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10/3/11 12:48 A

don't worry too much about it. every kid develops at their own pace. as my mom always told me "you've never seen a kid graduate from highschool still drinking a bottle, wearing diapers and using a pacifier". Your child will get there...don't sweat it.



LUANN_IN_PA
Posts: 15,544
10/2/11 6:44 P

You should be asking advice from your pediatrician.



SWEETDARLA
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10/2/11 1:36 P

Don't sweat it. My middle child, who's now 10 and can talk your ear off, didn't start doing any talking besides ba, ma, and da until he was nearly 4 yrs old. And even after that it was slowing going with the talking until he was a little past 5. Then he made up for lost time. :)

I had the same fears as you, but my pediatrician said it was common for some boys to be late talkers and it'd probably be no big deal. One thing that I think did help to get my son to talk more was storytelling. I'd tell him a monster story (his choice, not mine lol) and then he'd "tell" me one back. Not much talking on his part but I think it was good practice for him anyway and got him motivated to try harder to talk.



JENNY_BILLOT
Posts: 1,634
10/2/11 12:48 P

My son will be 13months tomorrow and I know I shouldn't be worried about him talking but he hardly says a thing. He says mama and dada and he TRIES to say other words but shouldn't he be saying a few more words by now? He'll say "BI" for bite and "Ki" for kitty or makes the "c" sound when we say c words like car but he doesn't really SAY them. When should I start to worry?
He's great at other mobile things like walking, running, grabbing, pinching, pulling up, climbing, walking backwards etc...he's more of a DO-er than a talker.
Advice? Reassurance?



 
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