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No Vegan Support from Friends or Family..



 
 
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AUTUMSUN
SparkPoints: (5,154)
Fitness Minutes: (1,767)
Posts: 153
5/28/12 1:01 P

This is just the pick-me-up I needed today!
I have joined some online vegan groups so I can find some like minded friends so I can get the encouragement and advice I need. Thanks for the support.



SALSGIVERL
SparkPoints: (2,275)
Fitness Minutes: (710)
Posts: 141
5/24/12 9:02 A

I recently became vegan myself after watching Fork Over Knives, Food Inc and Food Matters. I've had some family tell me "I've heard you stopped eating!" I tell them NO, I just took out the meat in my diet so I can live a long healthy life!" It's hard because people think they can't live without meat! But they don't ask the more important question, "Can your kids, spouse or friends live without you?" I've lost 16 pounds and I have endless energy. I have a lot of mom neighbors who have kids around the same age as my children and they talk about not having energy and being tired all the time. The lifestyle change to Vegan speaks for itself. Food is medicine. Don't be discouraged, but use it as a tool to educate others. It's an opportunity to advocate for what's important to you. When people make a comment about it I start telling them the statistics and facts about the link between red meat and cancer. I also look at it as a way to be the change I want to see. After being on the vegan lifestyle for a month, one of my sunday school mom's told me she was inspired by my eating healthier and promised to include a meatless meal once a week. Stick to your guns girl. I'm behind you all the way!!!



MCOGIRL
Posts: 91
5/24/12 8:06 A

How rude of your friends. I don't think you've done anything wrong - doesn't sound at all like you are trying to make them be vegans - just want them to accept that you are. First off - good for you! It is down right scary to see how these big factory farms are not only torturing animals - but giving people meat that is filled with growth chemicals and bacteria. I know you don't want to do online support - but if you don't know anyone else who is vegan - maybe that is at least better than nothing. Do you have any co-ops near you? There is a website that lists all co-ops in the country - I will see if I can find it. My co-op has tons of vegan options - and tends to be frequented by more people who are health conscience like vegans. As far as your "friends" - not sure why they would make fun of you for not eating meat. I think people don't want to understand other peoples viewpoints and think theirs is always the right one. I think all you can do is not talk about it with them. Eat the way you want and allow them to eat what they want. And if they still decide to not respect your decision - then stop hanging around them. Not like you are telling them they have to be vegan..... Good luck.



JADOMB
SparkPoints: (93,673)
Fitness Minutes: (25,022)
Posts: 1,627
5/22/12 2:06 A

Yes, I did read your OP and even your second attempt. In your second attempt, you cleared up some of your original comments and added more. So I think even you notice that your OP had some implications that part of this was your fault. As we write and read these posts it is not always that clear and all we can do it reply to what we get from the post. You may totally be the coolest person in the world with your new found lifestyle, but it didn't come across as that in your OP.

That being said, I still say that it isn't a requirement for folks to accept what they don't agree with. It's nice if they can tolerate it and even nicer if they don't get rude. But you also have to tolerate their beliefs. As far as support, again, how can you expect support for something they don't agree with?

I have a niece that is full on vegan and it has caused some friction between her and my brother and sister. In their case, I have seen how my niece has been a bit pushy with her "needs" and my brother and sister have tried to accommodate her. It sounds petty for folks to have such a disagreement over food, but it happens.

So without being a fly on the wall, I can't really tell what is happening in your household. Growing thick skin is something many folks need to do more of these days. Don't sweat it, if you want to be a vegan, be one, don't look for support, look for good recipes. ;-)



AUTUMSUN
SparkPoints: (5,154)
Fitness Minutes: (1,767)
Posts: 153
5/22/12 12:19 A

Did you even read my post???
If you did, then you'd understand that my family is making fun of me for eatting this way, telling me its stupid --- when I make my own food and just sit down and eat.
And my friends know that I I'll go eat anywhere they want as long as they'll serve salad. I'm not trying to force it on them at all. When I showed that video to my friend its because she asked me too show it to her. The whole reason it came up is because when they come over they ask me whats knew and thats what I said.
I never forced it on anyone, I just want them to stop making fun of me and stop telling me I need to eat meat. I want them to leave me be about it just like I am with them. When I help them by thowing out their meat for them to cook later, does it sound like I'm forcing my beliefs on them? They can do what they want as long as they just let me be.
I just dont know how to tell them their comments all the time upset me. I dont want to sound rude to them, but I also want to get my point across that I'm serious.



JADOMB
SparkPoints: (93,673)
Fitness Minutes: (25,022)
Posts: 1,627
5/21/12 9:51 P

I don't know, but it kinda sounds like you are pushing your new eating habits onto your friends. That may be one of the reasons they are not supporting you. Even when one is just dieting or whatever, one of the quickest ways to turn friends off is to push it onto them.

As far as folks that just don't "support" you even if you are NOT pushing it onto them, why should they? Most of us non-vegans don't agree with the nutritional benefits of total vegans. So it would be wrong to support something one does not believe is healthy or good. I am tolerant and accepting of my friends and family that are full on vegans, but I'm not "supportive". I still love them and care for them, but I don't necessarily agree with their eating lifestyle. Especially when they have young kids and it is forced onto them.

Don't take me wrong, I eat many vegan foods and my meat intake is minimal, I just don't think we humans were meant to be total vegetarians. Bottom line, if you need support to be a vegan, then you need to reach out to other vegans.



AUTUMSUN
SparkPoints: (5,154)
Fitness Minutes: (1,767)
Posts: 153
5/21/12 3:17 P

I recently decided to go vegan for ethical and medical reasons.. But there's only one person who sorta supports me and thats my mom. She hasnt dogged me like the rest of my family when they found out, but she really hasnt shown much interest either.
I dont know anyone thats vegan or vegetarian, so its really making my struggle a little harder. Other then SparkTeams I dont have anyone to go to for advice. And its just not the same when its online.. I want that one on one support. But I dont know how to find it.
Since most of my friends have gotten married and moved away with kids now, I really online have 2 friends.. One is a besty that I usually spend a day with once or twice a week. She got completely upset when I told her about the vegan thing, and she hasnt really talked to me since. I've tried txting her but the only thing she has talked back to me was when she posted on my FB "I lost my eating out friend to veganism" when I posted a vegan recipe online...Thats been 2 1/2 weeks now.
The other friend is a couple of years younger then me, and the last time I talked to her I showed her the Earthlings video that fully "converted" me to veganism and she decided she was going to be lacto-ovo-vegetarian. But we hardly see each other because our schedules are opposite, and she doesnt have regular access to the internet. And she hardly has minutes on her phone so we only talk once every couple of weeks.
I just wanna find that support system ya know. I know to know that someone believes in me, that I can stick to my choices, and support me in my decision. But I'm not finding it, and I dunno what to do about it. I've talked to co-workers and customers (I'm a cashier) to maybe find other vegans but none so far. If anyone has ANY advice I'm open to them all so please post here or my inbox. Thanks for your time.



 
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