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KMINEHAN77 Posts: 20
7/22/12 8:13 P

I'm sorry that you are feeling so sad. I've been stuck in a rut recently too. My weight loss has stalled and it's left me feeling very negative about myself. The other day a friend said to me, " if you spoke to me the way you talk to yourself, we wouldn't be friends anymore." and she is right! I have found it helpful, when I feel like ripping myself to pieces, to think about someone I care about, someone I love (my mother, or my daughter) and then imagine myself saying those mean things to her. It stops me everytime. I was surprised by how quickly it changed my mindset. You deserve to treat yourself as well as you would treat someone you adore. You deserve to adore yourself. I hope it gets better for you, and kudos for asking for help!

KERIANNA77 Posts: 54
7/22/12 7:25 P

Hi Two Crows- I too have struggled with the negative self-talk. I've learned how to turn the mean things I say to myself around into positive things. Anytime you catch yourself thinking the negative thoughts, follow them up directly with a positive. What do you like about yourself? Whether it's your friendly personality, your shiny hair, your pretty smile, your great sense of humor... think of these things often. Make a list! You are so worthwhile and are doing something great by putting energy into your desire for a healthy life-style. Three cheers for you!!!

LILM39 SparkPoints: (372)
Fitness Minutes: (428)
Posts: 6
7/22/12 6:23 P

TwoCrows - you seem like an amazing young lady! And kudos to you for working on your health and fitness at a young age! You are NOT any of the adjectives you described and when the time comes (when you are not looking), you will meet the right person. Keep up the good work!

To help with the negative talk, I would suggest celebrating your victories and taking everything one day at a time. You have to break this cycle of lattes and too much mac and cheese. Once you have a couple of days under your belt, you will regain your momentum. Something that helps me is trying something new or out of my comfort zone whenever possible. I feel more confident when I try new things. Also, talk to your friends and family more - whether its a phone call, email, or nice greeting card.

ANTI_M SparkPoints: (4,713)
Fitness Minutes: (964)
Posts: 195
7/22/12 6:22 P

Being negative is working for you, because you reward it with food. So you have to make being positive work for you instead. Try writing down three positive things on a small card. When you start the self-talk, stop, read the card aloud and look in a mirror and smile. It will feel phony as heck at first, but give it a shot. When you smile, it honestly can lift your mood. The smile will be your reward.

Start the day with a compliment you give yourself!

As for the comfort food, have you tried tasty things you enjoy which are better choices? Can you at least reduce how often to your portion sizes? If you can, even now and then, that's a good step.

That's not medical advice or anything, just something which worked for a friend.


TWOCROWS SparkPoints: (1,198)
Fitness Minutes: (2,172)
Posts: 67
7/22/12 6:08 P

I am writing this as a cry for help. This past month or so I have been lavishing myself with horrible negative self talk, more than usual.

"I am small, ugly, stupid, weak..."
"I am lazy and fearful."
"No one will ever want to marry me. I will forever be single because I have nothing to offer."
"I am no fun to be around and have no friends"

The list goes on. Ever since junior high I have been dealing with this, and I can say that in many ways being depressed is a comfort to me. I have stopped working out consistently and have been smuggling cookies and eating large helpings of Velveeta mac & cheese. 4 dollar lattes have been finding their way into my life on a daily basis, because it gives me "comfort".

I don't know what I'm asking for... but I feel very sad. I want to have a pep in my step and feel strong, healthy, and happy.

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