8/8/15 - Dirty Girl Mud Run 5K fun!
Summer 2003 - A before pic of me (190 lbs) and my husband (240 lbs)
June 2014 - An after pic of me (133) & hubby (155) - on Maintenance together for at least 3 years.
I have 42 pics in my gallery
It's all about the journey...and keeping it real.
My journey began on Feb 7, 2008 and to date I have lost a solid 55 pounds using SP. I'm not an athlete. I'm not a work-out-aholic. I'm a typical mom who used to never exercise and would sit on the couch and watch tv at night when the kids finally went to bed, snack whenever on whatever, and sweating was evil to me....well, that has all changed.
I increased my water, started moving my body slowly and steadily, increased those fruits and veggies, increased the good whole grains, ...
My journey began on Feb 7, 2008 and to date I have lost a solid 55 pounds using SP. I'm not an athlete. I'm not a work-out-aholic. I'm a typical mom who used to never exercise and would sit on the couch and watch tv at night when the kids finally went to bed, snack whenever on whatever, and sweating was evil to me....well, that has all changed.
I increased my water, started moving my body slowly and steadily, increased those fruits and veggies, increased the good whole grains, and used the SP diet and articles as my guideline to educate myself into a healthier lifestyle. I still have workout issues - I'd rather not sweat, but I have seen the benefits and would rather move my body and feel good than be what I was...heavy, depressed and unhappy with my body and self for getting that way. Sweating feels good now - it tells me I am an efficient fat burning machine!!
My message to anyone out there who reads this is simple - if you put your mind to do this and get in that "zone" of I CAN DO THIS - guess what, you can. Use each accomplishment, however small, as that boost to get to that next level. A pound is a pound which will lead to more if you focus. Ten minutes walking on a treadmill will lead to a half hour and some running if you build up to it slow and steady. Have faith in yourself. Love yourself. Take time for yourself. You are a work in progress, and this is a marathon, not a race. You will get to that place you want to be if you just try your best and never give up. YOU CAN DO THIS!
So below is all that I have entered since the beginning of my journey...I don't think I will ever erase it because it's all true and one little bit may help someone out.
I'm a 35 year old mom of 3 wonderful sons, and I work too...I have a great husband - he's my second self and soulmate.
After being pregnant or nursing for the last 5 years, it's time to take care of myself. I've never been thin in my entire life, and I don't even expect to be now. I just want to get a healthier lifestyle and be a good example to my kids. If a new body comes with that lifestyle - so be it!
I've found that almost everyday of my life, I think about my weight and body image, and I don't like what I see ...so enough is enough.
I have to thank my sister Margie and her friend Lisa - you brought me to SP and I thank you with all my heart.
So on Feb 7, 2008, I cut off my long curly hair and vowed to begin anew. No more hiding behind the past, the hair and the excuses.
On this day, I weigh 187. Sizes: top - 1X/tight XL, bottom - 16/18
OK... Pretty steady with losing, and I know everybody goes attheir own pace. Things I've learned and do:
1 - Track everything - and I mean everything!!
2 - I drink my water. I'm thirsty all the time now because my body is so used to it.
3 - I TRY to stick to my exercise program. To be honest, I don't track housework or playing with the kids all that much because it is so subjective. Any extra calories burned is just that...a mystery bonus!
4 - I read labels now.
5 - I cook now.
6 - I try to be positive and forgive myself when I stumble.
Those were the big changes that I've done to get to this point. So far, so good. Slow and steady winds the race.
- God has a path for all of us, all we have to do is live... and have faith that we chose the right one.
- This too shall pass.
- Everyday is a new day, with no mistakes in it.
- It all will work itself out in the end.
- Never give up.
I wrote this on a Sparkfriend's page in regard to diet pills, cleanses, and crash diets...she told me to put it on a business card! - "Consider the magic pill being a big dose of education on exercise and nutrition"
Just borrowed this from Valeriemaha's page because I loved it so much:
Live in rooms full of light
Avoid heavy food
Be moderate in the drinking of wine
Take massage, baths, exercise, and gymnastics
Fight insomnia with gentle rocking or the sound of running water
Change surroundings and take long journeys
Strictly avoid frightening ideas
Indulge in cheerful conversation and amusements
Listen to music.
-- Aulus Cornelius Celsus (ca 25BC - ca50BC), Physician
"I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something that I can do."
This is just to show you how my journey is going - ups and downs included as an extra bonus feature!
Update: 2/28/08 - 177 - WOW!
I don't have any time line goals, but a secret one was to be 10 pounds lighter before my official 35th birthday...and I did it! I'm entering March a very happy girl! More energy, feeling stronger, looking better overall. For my birthday, my sister wants to buy me pants that make my ass look good. Isn't she sweet!?!
Update: 3/13/08 - 173
I can see my jawline!! And two people today noticed that I looked thinner! Bless their eyes. The both asked what I was doing and I just told them - watching what I eat, counting calories and exercising. "Any particular program?" they both (separately) ask me, and the next thing I know, I'm gushing about Sparkpeople.com!! They both took the email address on pieces of paper...2 more new members for SP. Too bad I didn't give them my Spark name - I could have gotten points!
Update: 3/27/08 - 170
Tough couple weeks because of the holidays (St. Pat's & Easter) but I'm holding my own. I'm almost halfway down to my goal weight. My fear now is that I'm going to plateau. My middle sister's advice - don't weigh myself for 2 weeks, so when I go on, I'll be surprised....I don't know if I'm going to do that one yet.
Update: 4/3/08 - 168 Sizes: top - XL, bottom - 14
Broke the halfway barrier! I have not worked out in one whole week because of a bad upper respiratory/head cold. I kept my calories in the low 1200 range when I could to counter the calories not being burned during a workout. Well, it worked! My metabolism has changed enough to sustain a week of not exercising. I actually miss exercising and I can't wait to get back to my routine!
Update: 4/10/08 -165
My cold came back. I still have not worked out to any great extent or long duration. A few slow half miles here and there and 2 days of light strength training this week. I was even in the higher calorie range most of the week. So for anyone who is having a problem getting their workouts in because of whatever reason - have faith. Keep in those calorie ranges and you will see progress. Use the Sparkdiet as a guideline and make good choices. It will work. My husband weighed 230 when I started this journey. He is now 205 with no set workout routine to speak of. So you see - it can be done. Get in the zone!
Update: 4/17/08 - 165 - Plateau??
So my lazy days of being ill and not moving are at an end. So is the movement on the ticker...but I am not discouraged. It's been a tough week trying to get back into the exercise routine, and some awkward food choices here and there did not help as well. I'm determined to pump up the exercise opportunities and make healthy food choices. We'll be camping next week - not an ideal food situation, but we'll see what we can do. I'm in Stage 3 now, so I should be logging food once a week to see if the choices I make are good ones. It will be a good test. I am very determined to prove to myself that I can do this with the knowledge I have attained. The one great thing about camping...you walk everywhere!
Update: 04/25/08 - 165
Camping was great! Eating the right foods was not! At least I did not gain, right? Anyway, we brought snack pack chips for portion control, and there was not too much in between meal snacking going on. Limited veggies and fruits, and not much water drunk as well. Don't even ask about the S'mores! So now it's time to get some help and set some goals for the month of May! Hubby has been enlisted as my cheerleader, and the gas prices are making me think that I'll be walking to work in the mornings if the weather permits.
Update: 05/01/08 - 163 No longer obese!
Broke thru the plateau!! I'm no longer considered obese according to the BMI index! Mini-goal accomplished!
I have to send a shout out to the 30-something ladies for the kick in the pants on this one. You're 10 day challenge put me on the train out of Funkietown! Choo choo! P&P ladies - the walks have been a great push - I bought that pedometer b/c of you guysand push it every day. My LI Challenge Buddy - you are next! Time to kick butt and take some names!
Update: 05/08/08 - 160
Holy cow! So here's the deal, as you can see above, I hit a plateau, and to break it, I joined a challenge and rethought my approach to exercise. Don't get me wrong, that stall DID have me bummed out, and before SP, I would have given up completely, but to give up was just not an option - I had come way too far. So the lesson learned is this - never give up, never get too down, look at what you HAVE accomplished before and can do again, and then DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! You alone have that power!
Update: 05/15/08 - 160 Sizes: top - XL, bottom - 12
I took it a little easy this week...just a little tired from the previous challenge. Hey, it happens! Cardio is a little less than I'd like (not much sweating going on there), but the strength has been kicking butt...I've increased reps to 4 of each exercise and I've done them all. Food wise - I'm having a hard time getting to my calorie range for some reason! I haven't planned my snacks well and those keep me in range. So here's what I'm working on this week - calorie range & sweating during cardio. No pounds lost this week, but muscle weighs more than fat, so I'm OK with that. PS - HAD to buy new jeans, 14s falling off! YAY!! Into the back of the closet you go!
Update: 05/22/08 - 158
Happy Birthday to my brother Sean! I miss you big brother!!
Deb - I hope you are feeling better! Congrats on the new job!
Margie - I'm sending you all my brainpower to help you on your test! Good luck!
I'm speechless as to the weight loss this week. I was not myself because of illness last Fri and it threw my whole week off in the exercise dept. I am happy to report that I did do strength last night after all and things are AOK and back to "normal" - whatever that is! LOL!
Update: 05/29/08 - 157
I was sure this week was a goner...when I got home from camping the scale read 160. No water drunk and lots of carbs over the weekend...so I put my nose to the grindstone and was uber good, plus my gut was feeling the effects of s'mores ;) so I had to cut down on fats like crazy. Well the water weight came off and so did a pound. Lesson learned - chocolate is something for once in a while, and only a little...darned biled duct!
Update: 06/05/08 - 156.5
I'm not putting it in as 156 yet...I think I'm in denial about being in size 12s and in the 150s...like a dream is going on and I'll wake up and POOF! I'm really 185 still. Besides being a head case - I feel pretty good...cals in range, water drunk, exercise back in line thanks to the 10 day challenge. I'm actually sore for the first time in a long time. My size 16/18 clothes are in a bag ready to go to good will.
Update: 06/12/08 - 155
My brain is still stuck on "the heaviness" of me...I'm 165 in my head now. At least it's not 185 like last week! LOL I keep giving myself pep talks, which is so important to do because it keeps you focused...try it, you might like it. Anyway, the NYC area heat wave has passed. It reached 100.5 on my house thermometer. I was doing my 10 day personal challenge when the heat wave hit, so my good roll of exercising was cut in half. Oh well, back to picking up those pieces again, for like the 100th time! And ooooo - five pounds til goal - WOW! (It's sabotage time people!) That's just my subconscoius talking - ignore it. Not this time, baby! Shut up, weak inner fat chick! I'm not listening to you anymore!!!! BTW - I'm very happy right now, and content with everything I've done. Anything else after this is gravy.
Update: 06/19/08 - 155
No change in weight this week, as far as I know - LoL! And that is OK. My fruit/veggie intake is higher than before and I started taking a multi-vitamin when I started tracking my vitamin intake - very lackluster to say the least. I've been on the TM every other day again, another good thing. So there definitely are positives in my world right now. It will pay off eventually. Now to work on that strength training (maybe I'll just stick that in after cardio and take every other day off) - the time when I could be doing it has been occupied with making teacher gifts and cleaning the house for a big 4 year old family birthday party! It will get prioritized sooner than later.
Update: 06/26/08 - 153
Another holy cow to add to the wonderment of losing weight!
Last Thursday was the last time I exercised on the TM, then the world became crazy and I had to be Mom in full swing...hey, it happens. My diet has been pretty steady, which is key, except for Friday when I just had to eat...my body was screaming for food for whatever reason. So I listened and felt much better - mentally & physically. I was very active too, which is probably why I lost without conventional exercise...but now I am feeling it...a little tired...so I know what to do - back to the grind! LoL Not really, just jokin'. Today is the last day of Camping prep because we leave tomorrow for one week - so if I'm quiet, well - I'm not here!!! Mini-goal for camping week - wake up early and walk the park wearing my pedometer...maybe I'll hit goal! Wish me luck!
Update: 07/03/08 - 8pm weigh in just for fun & not logged - 155! :)
Back from camping a day early, and probably a good thing. Our journey took us thru the Hamptons of eastern Long Island's south fork. The traffic on the 4th would have been murder (it is 1 lane both ways most times), so my inkling was to leave a little earlier - gut feeling, really...it worked out great. Food wise - lots of meat and bread carbs, no real veggies and water drunk either...and chips...high salt intake. So I'm not really surprised at 2 pounds! I'm back on the saddle again. Tomorrow is a hydration day. The 2 pounds should fly right off and then I'm right back where I started when I left. Oh, and before I forget - no s'mores whatsoever! Some donuts, but no s'mores. LoL!!! Oh, Oh, Oh - had to buy shorts for bathingsuit - it's too big on the bottom now and getting loose around the back. Tee hee hee!!!
Update: 07/10/08 - 153 Sizes: top - L, bottom - 10
Back to where I was! But the body is changing significantly. On 5/16 and 160, I had to buy size 12s and a new bra at VS...my gal there measured me as a 40C. Well, the bra ripped in the center and had to be returned, same girl measuring and I'm officially a 38C. 2 inches off the back. It has only been more noticable the last 2 weeks and I can get into the large tops in my closet this week. XL tops are noticably too big. I have one week to 9th anniversary goal - 150 and a loose wedding dress. I'm exercising every other day and in calorie ranges, we'll see!
Update: 07/17/08 - 151
My 9th Anniversary on 7/16 - Mini-goal accomplished - wedding dress is loose! The top fell off my shoulders! DONE!
My plateau was broken this week by doing my exercise routine religously in the morning - first time ever for AM workouts, and it works out great for the summer. I was so active between that and yard work, that my cals were increased too by a signifcant amount. So that being said, I probably was not eating enough and my body didn't want to give up any poundage for the last month. LoL Never a dull moment - I learn something new everyday!
I'm one away from goal and uber excited! When that happens, watch out! this page is going to be totally revamped!
Update: 07/18/08 - 150 - GOAL GOAL GOAL!!!!!!!
I can't believe it! Just for S&G I went on the scale and the ANGEL'S SANG!!!!!!! A holy light filled my bathroom and washed over my shoulders and gave me a sense of peace!!! LOL At last!!!
We are going camping in - oh, an hour - but I had to come and post this - it is TOO BIG!!!
Update: 07/23/08 - 150 Maintenance
So here is a new adventure! Never a dull moment, that is for sure. Now I get to see how maintenance goes. I believe that the body has an equilibrium if you eat healthy and are active...let's see where I land. If I lose more weight that is just fine.
Update: 07/31/08 - 150
Maintenance is going ok! It's weird to eat more, to tell the truth. The past week was very hard - emotional, not exercising consistently....but hey, that is life, right? To wrap my head around this phase is difficult. You'd think it would be easy! Not necessarily...it's another type of training that is going on. Mentally easing up on not counting calories and "living" while still trying to be active and not cheating myself out of that workout time because I've hit goal and I'm "done." Very interesting. On my personal tracker, I have put in 136 as my ultimate goal by 2/7/09. It lowered my cals to 1300-1650. Previous maintenance cals were 1500-1950. If I stay in those ranges, I'll be fine and not too guilt ridden - LOL - it's hard to break a good habit for another good habit. I'm learning still and need my SP safety net! Baby steps...
Update: 08/03/08 - Ms. Done for Done Team
WOW is all I can say! WOW. I opened up SP and saw my SPmail at 8:30pm and the note saying I was Ms. Done. It is now almost 11pm and I've been bombarded with visits and I am so honored that you are here - I truly am! I don't know what to say! I'm touched, truly and honestly touched. Thank you. I'll be paying the visits right back - I'm good like that...it might take me a while, but I will!
Update: 08/07/08 - 150
Socializing killed me!! On 08/02 I was 152 and trying not to beat myself up. I jump back in the saddle & took control, which worked because I'm back done to 150. Before I started SP, I was ignoring my weight & body, like it didn't exist. Now I feel like I'm obsessing a little and comparing myself to others (my sisters, really) and not feeling like I accomplished anything. I know! How stupid is that! Just must be the week that I'm in....LoL THIS TOO SHALL PASS!!
Side note::: I'm in the process of page bopping...it's going to take a while...
Update: 08/14/08 - 150
Yeah, 150 still, but if I keep going the way I'm going, it will be 155 again soon. No joke. Bad 2 weeks are over. I feel like I'm me again, which is a good thing. Whatever happened is over and done with. The upside of this week? I have a new fridge fully stocked with healthy food again! YAY!! Life in fridge limbo was bad. I don't recommend it. I almost didn't update this week...wanted to forget about it entirely, but why break a good streak! LOL
PS - just found out it was a FULL MOON week. It explains SOOO much it isn't even funny. Thanks Mother Nature - the joke is on me! On top of it all, say hello to my little friend - LMAO!!
Update: 08/21/08 - 149 Shirt size: 12/14 or M/L, Pants: 10P
Fluctuations are fun in maintenance land! I don't even know if I should put that number down...it probably won't stay & will be gone tomorrow, but for now, I am 149! Teeheehee...last time I was that, I was wearing a uniform in high school.
So here is the deal - exercise - a bit lackluster, but I'm not surprised about that - moderation with everything includes that too. Food - much better than last week's pms/moon week. Water - right on. Tracking...trying, but after a while, you get a routine of things you eat and know what they are calorie/fat/carb/protein wise and almost don't need to...I'm still tracking for others to view what I eat....feel free to take a peek on my food log. Pre-planning events was big the last 2 weeks too...it helped me stay on track even though the pms/moon thing was in full swing.
UPDATE ON Updating!!! 09/06/08 - 150 and holding steady
I just erased a bunch of updates...they were all the same...everything going AOK at 150. It's kind of silly to keep making my page longer & longer, so I'm only going to do it if something really extraordinary happens...like I lose 5 more pounds - LOL!!! But really, maintenance is a lot of tweaking and trial & error, and an emotional and mental journey just like losing the weight. So I'll be blogging a little more instead.
Update: 09/18/08 - 146
I said I'd update if I lost 5 more pounds...so it's 4, but who's counting. My new clothes fit even better, but the old clothes (shirts) really are starting to be WAY to big, even to muddle through. Fitting in with my sisters and SILs is a little strange and I am trying to wrap my head around this new body. Saw high school pictures - I'm thinner now than I was back then. Very weird. My brain reads 164 instead of 146....eventually my brain will catch up. Old ways are also trying to creep back in, but I have learned and lost too much to give in to those things. Never again. Going camping for the next 4 weekends...should be interesting.
Update: 10/02/08 - 146 and holding
A week of great and then a week of not so great! Ah, the rollercoaster of life! LOL I was on a roll with my TM and then life happened. Kids home & DH home = my routine off. Thank goodness I have me time today. It is so important to have that me time. That is life in a nutshell. One week of not tracking food is now into 2 weeks...so far so good. I signed up to be my son's denmother for cub scouts - a new challenge! YAY!! No way would I have done that 8 months ago.
Update: 10/16/08 - 146 (it's a bloody miracle)
No joke. Miracle....well, maybe not all divine intervention, it was me that took the bull by the balls and fixed things. That's how it should be. Me. So the last 2 weeks were god-awful...off track, stress eating, blog-bitching, no exercise - got up to 150...(insert hysterical giggle here). I got back from camping and jumped back in the saddle (again). Water water water...the miracle cure for bloating and puffiness, and started tracking & walking again. It worked like a charm (again). Notice all the "agains"....I do this to point out that all is not lost when you fall off the wagon. All you have to do is jump back in. I listened to my own past advice on this one because it's a "been there, done that" too.
Update: 10/30/08 - 146 and holding steady
Where the heck did those last 2 weeks go????? Super busy - whirlwind stuff - calender packed - never been like this before - just the beginning I'm sure. The great thing is that I finally feel like me in my own skin. When I'm in public (which has been considerable lately), I don't think about how I look anymore - I'm just me. What a feeling. I wish I could bottle that one up and sell it. I'd be a billionaire. Holidays are coming up...another challenge...bring it!
Update: 11/13/08 - 149.5
Trying not to beat myself up...one good week, then one bad week. I just blogged about the pattern I see. This was a bad bad bad week for food...I know exactly where things went wrong. Now it's time to wake up and smell the coffee and get back on track before my body rebels and I get physically sick from the extra fats (grease) and sugars - I happens to me that way, I'm unlucky with fats. Hey, I should consider it a blessing, right?
Update: 11/20/08 - 147.5
High salt intake = fluid retention. Exercise is still on the back burner...but all for good reason...I have used my lunch hour workouts to get some great Xmas deals at Toys R Us - total money saved to date - $180...total money (cash) put out - $210. 2 out of the 3 kids half way done. Now that is progress!
Update: 12/01/08 - Post thanksgiving - 147 - I'll take it!
That's what the scale said mid-day today...Xmas gifting is almost done...lots of homemade goodies going out for the teachers this year - sugared walnuts and chocolate covered pretzel rods made by yours truly. Game plan for Dec is to move it slow & steady again, watch the foods during the week and then let things be "normal" on the weekends...DH makes it hard to be good around him, that handsome & loving SOB. I blame the football, not him. My "weekly normal" is way NOT NORMAL for regular people...I have to accept that. Regular fat intake makes me sick - literally. I'm feeling better today already after doing some yoga and crunches...thank god.
Update - 12/4/08 - 146
Finally things are back to normal - my normal that is! LOL
Update - 12/26/08 - ????? tight size 8s ?????
Don't even ask!!! read the blog...it says it all! LMAO
Scared to weigh this morning...waiting a few days after water detox...I'll check back later...God help us all! LMAO!
Update - 01/05/09 - 150.5 Happy New Year!!!
Okey dokey - believe it or not - that is a gain of 4.5 pounds over the holiday season...no exercise at all and eating tons of crap. So glad I had the 4 pound cushion on my goal! But it does make me realize that I have to get back on track or that scale is going to keep going up...it actually got up to 151.5 last week, but I couldn't update it because I went away. The good thing is that I got right back onto the TM and threw out all the cookies in the house and put away the holiday beverages right after Christmas, so all was not completely lost. I knew and felt like I was slipping off the wagon. So here I am again, back to the updates. Now here is the god-honest truth about tracking in Maintenanceville #1 - it's hard to start again once you stop, #2 - I know the calorie counts of my usual stuff, so I don't tend to track that stuff anymore, #3 - tracking 1 or 2 days like SP says really is an eyeopener when you need it, so just do it and get that reality check. Wow - long update, but it was overdue, and heck, it's a new year! Make it a good one!
Update: 1/12/09 - 148
Nothing like a week of good habits to kick a few pounds to the curb! Back in goal range and sooo happy not to see 150 on the scale. Promise kept to myself of fighting the 150s - DONE!
UPDATE: 2/7/09 - 147.7 Happy Anniversary to me!!!
On this day a year ago, I started my new life journey. So glad I did, so glad I lost, so glad I maintain. The thought of not being here is unthinkable...so so glad I found Sparkpeople to help me out!
UPDATE: 3/6/09 0 - 148
Holy Moley!! This page was hit HARD on my birthday! LOL Wow guys - I'm touched and impressed! I completely forgot about the birthday list on the Done team! That being said....I'm caked out! Maxed out on snow and cold! I want spring here, like, yesterday. We had a blizzard on my birthday, which was fun - shoveling and playing in the snow. Now the snow is melting and I'm concocting a spring game plan because the winter one was uber-sucky and fell apart with every cold I got. Oh well...we truck on! as usual!
Update: 4/3/09 - -147.5
I am maintaining weight just fine....it's the fitness part that I still absolutely HATE and love to avoid at all costs. When I get to busy, OUT IT GOES without hesitation...but the side effects are not so hot...mushy middle, floppy arms, no energy. Is is worth that? I don't think so. Just ran on the TM...10 whole minutes of jogging without a blink...first time ever milestone. So the cardio is still good, the muscle tone is not. Always something to work on...always.
Update: 4/10/09 - who cares - probably 147
I'm just here reporting that I have had a successful workout week, owing many thanks to my kids! They have been absolute angels while I attempted the treadmill every other day this week! They can sit at the table and color or play playdough for a 30 to 50 minutes straight without asking for ANYTHING! God bless their little hearts!!!! And I'm a happier mom because of the exercise! :)
Update: 04/20/09 - 153 I know, I know....WTF happened!
This is Easter & stress eating. I am not immune to the evil that lurks in my mind...but at least I am being honest with you all, which is half the battle. Reassessing everything today, so bear with me...setting new goals, changing things up, getting rid of dead weight. Spring cleaning, so to speak.
Update: 5/01/09 - 146.1 Back to normal at last!!
As you may see above...things were off track in the last update. I got back to tracking - big time and for me, things bounced back. It felt good to know that all I had learned before was still there and all of the tools here at SP work when you use them correctly. Yesterday was the very first day, in a very looong time (before holidays) that I felt more myself. Ahhhh - I can breathe again!
Update: 05/08/09 - 144.4 Holy crap!
I truly & honestly was not trying to lose weight! I swear to God! I have just been eating waaaaay better than I have in a long time and tracking my food. Last month was so horrible and I felt so horrible that I have completely stayed away from all the bad stuff & I started really listening to my body - I stop before I am too full, unlike last month's mental nightmare. Yes, I did bring down the cal range to get rid of the 153 weight and I have been exercising a little more consistently - nothing fab, but moving my butt nonetheless. There is no secret weapon here either. Pushing ups off the kitchen cabinets when I'm bored, crunches on the ball when the kids leave me alone, some resistance band reps in between American Idol commercials...my treadmill 2 times a week. I read somewhere that if you just did pushups and siteups everyday, you could lose 7 pounds in a few months....maybe it's true. :)
Update: 5/17/09 - 146 SP Motivator of the day
Just found out (4:30pm) that I was the SP Motivator of the day! LoL Whohoo!!! I've been so busy that I didn't get here until now!
For all who read this today...thanks for coming by! SP keeps me in check and keeps me going in the right direction. Basically, I'm a lifer now!!
Update: 6/26/09 - 147 - - - Normal fluctation
boy this month and a half has been NUTS!!! Sparking has taken a backseat again (sorry everyone - it happens). I miss it sooooo much, but there is only so many hours in the day! anyway, summer is here and if this rain EVER goes away, maybe we can actually get outside again and be ACTIVE! In the meantime hang in there everyone!! Make good choices - I'm going to try and do the same :)
Update: 7/11/09 - 150 (was 153 on Monday, so I'm happy)
Back from vacation and it's weightgain! LOL - no worries! Up and down we go....this week is big - my 1 year maintenance anniversary is at hand, along with my 10 year wedding anniversary - practically on the same day! Part of my goal was to maintain 150 and never go above again for the rest of my life. I'm happy to say HOORAY! to myself, because I have done that...I can say that even before the anniversary because it is true. Can I be more "FIT" - yes, but part of maintenance is accepting what is at hand within your life at that moment in time...I'm a mom to young kids...when I'm done with diapers, my chiseled body will emerge........eventually - LOL!!
Update: Goal Anniversary week - 1 year at goal and maintaining
What a year. I'm happy to say I'm maintaining my goal range of 146-150 and whenever I get over 150 (and I have, several times) - I turn right back to Sparking and take control again. My one year anniversary also coincides with my 10 year wedding anniversary! How fitting! To go away with hubby even for just 2 nights is a treat and to go on this week makes it all the more special. Yay!!
Update: 7/27/09 -150
Working out in humidity has never been fun, but that is part of why I'm doing it. I HAVE TO get back to exercising more consistently. I cannot maintain without it at all. Tried, (trust me, I tried) to maintain without it b/c of being so busy, but alas it is not possible. So back in the saddle I go! We live and we learn everyday. My mini-goal is to get back to 146...anything after that is gravy.
Update: 8/4/09 - 150
I think I see a waistline! Could that be??Another mini-goal...keep finding that waist! I missed the weights over the weekend. Never thought I'd say that one! LOL Well, camping is over& I didn't over-do-it with eating poorly or drinking too much and so now it's back to work!
UPdate: 8/22/09 -147 Slow Steady
Using the weights and stuff is changing! Very happy! :)
Update: 8/27/09 - 145 - Whoa!
Surprise, Surprise!! Didn't expect that one! LOL well, actually, I kinda did...things are back to normal for me - tracking is the key. And with the new nightly crunches and pushups in front of the TV, things have been slow and steady, which is what I want. Averaging everything out - 6 pounds put on took 6 weeks to get rid of! The wedding this weekend should be good - considering that Hurricane Danny is going to hit Montauk Point! At least we will all look fabulous!!
Update: 8/31/09 - Wedding was great!
Posted pics and uploaded a very interesting before pic from 2002 from my sister's 1st wedding. It's amazing how much changes in 7 years. Just goes to show you that life continues on, even in the darkest of days, and that love conquers all - even sent from the heavens above.
Update: 9/3/09 - Solid 144 (Size 10s are big)
Last time I even touched the number (144.4) was back in May of this year. I was soooo jazzed, and it didn't last too long after that b/c I got cocky. Not this time. I'm staying. I want to stay. I need to stay. For me. I am 5 foot 2 inches...SHORT. I think I want to try and make 136 (healthy BMI weight). I'm going to keep living the way I am and see what happens. I want more strength and flexiblity. I want the "wants" to become "needs."
~~ I had a bile duct attack 2 days ago - a product of eating food I am not used to (lobster, shrimp, ribs, alcohol). It stinks to have to live with that...it just makes me cut out the bad crap even more.
Update: 9/19/09 - 142 A mini-goal accomplished - size 8 pant/shirt M - weird for me....never been either - EVER in my life. Single digit pant? I am? Holy SUGAR!
I do occassionally set minigoals, one was to be 142 by my friend Fred's wedding. Didn't exactly hit it 2 weeks ago, but I got there in the month of Sept, so I'm happy with that. I don't post mini-goals here - I keep them in my head while I'm working on them - it's just what I do. Goes to show you that, eventually, if you are consistent, things do change.
Update: 10/04/09 - 142 holding steady
We went camping and I drank a lot one day...and had chips...a lot one day...sodium in general was up up up...even this week. Overall I went up and am now back down, which is normal for a party weekend. Now to get back into my workouts...a hard thing for me this week with the weather change and full moon coming on...I feel like hibernating!! LOL No fear though...all is well, 'tis part of the journey. :)
Update: 10/18/09...hesitant to put on the tracker...140...
Having a cold last week brought working out to a standstill...the ticker is lower because I wasn't in the mood to eat and ate really well and mostly soup! Anyway, I just won't put myself thru anything when my body needs rest...thus no fitness tracked. So in the meantime, I get a mushy middle - now worries, a week of solid workout will snap everything back into shape.
Update: 10/29/09 - 139.5 on my scale! Holy CRAP!
So I guess the tracker can be updated now. In this past week and a half, I have started to run on the treadmill. I even blogged about how I came about it. Stress drove me to it! LOL I did a mile and felt so proud...then I pushed another quarter mile....then another. I like it. I even bought running shoes, so you KNOW I'm serious. I think a Spring goal will be a 5K....at the very least on my treadmill. Look...I'm evolving! :) I am one point away from my uber-ultimate healthy BMI goal. I am going for it. All in due time.
Update: 11/17/09 - Not telling you!! Teeheehee, but it's GREAT!
What a tease I am! LOL But I will say that last week was VERY stinky and I had the flu...I blogged a bunch complaining about it too, so that is that. I did go on the scale yesteday and it said 138.2...today was a completely different story, and that is all I will say, for now. Teeheehee!! :)
Update: 11/18/09 - 137.7 !!!!! NO KIDDING!!
That is officially 50 pounds! and I am taking it! Whenever I when in lower, I always wait that extra day to report it....but I am making it official today! Wooooohoooo!!!!
Update: 12/10/09 - 137.5 - holding my own
Thanksgiving was a killer...yes, I saw 140 again and I wigged out...almost felt like I jumped to 150. Right back to tracking I went & drinking my water...worked like a charm...again. So now I know my new maintenance range is 136-140. Going to tackle this maintenance just like I did the 150 one. Eat moderately, track every other day or so, and try to exercise regularly. I won't say I don't have the time either...my office is uberslow, so I can get it in if I want to. No excuses not to anymore. Someday I might not have the opportunity...ie. if I go back to school. Went back to the old treadmill today again...3 miles and it felt great! an easy climb, a little run, my tunes to keep me up and going...so glad I went on. So glad. :o)
UPDATE: 12/11/09 - 136.6 - Healthy BMI weight & Uber-ultimate goal ACCOMPLISHED!!
I just updated the updates last night..amazing what really goes on ON your actual weigh-in day. I updated last night b/c I hadn't in a while...this morning was a pleasant surprise. I still stand by my Maintenance Range of 136-140, but it is nice to hit that uber-ultimate goal...I kinda knew I would hit it... eventually. What a nice Christmas present! This will keep me going healthy thru the holidays, that is for sure!
UPDATE: 12/29/09 - 138.5...not that hideous, all things considered
So the holiday of cookie binging (a bad year) and drinking has officially been halted (until New Year's Eve) and the report back is 138.5...last weigh in prior to that was 138...right smack in the middle of my maintenance range. Glad I went lower and hit that 136...it's a goal to get back to to stay on track, but I have been told by some close friends NOT to lose any more weight. I take those comments seriously. In fact, prior to their comment, I had decided that I really like this range & want to stay here for a very very very long time. I now have to concentrate on fitness. That is the new goal for 2010....fitness...moderate, maintainable fitness, with no guilt attached if it gets skipped here or there.
Update: 01/22/10 - 137 - oh my!! It's been a while!
So things are back to normal here....back to my maintenance weight that I am working on now. I'm happy to report that fitness is picking up too...not as consistent as I'd like, but hey, some is better than none. I did my pedometer a lot this past month....boy, I don't stop! I think that is part of my maintenance...not stopping movement. I basically stand a lot and walk a lot during the day and that burns a lot more calories than sitting....thank goodness! LOL
Update: 02/01/2010 - 137 Started classes
I can finally say that my online coarses are in full swing now that I have a new laptop (which didn't kill the budget completely & which is totally just for me & school) and now that I can access the program lectures online. Took long enough. ANYWAY...I am taking prerequisites in my dream to become a Registered Dietician one day. Spark brought me to this new career path...never in a million years would I have thought the 'enemy' (food) would be my savior! NOW - to keep balance between, work, family, school, and Spark....lol - yes, Spark. What? I have to keep sane somehow!!
Update: 02/28/10 - 138 - post vacation/mid-stress weight
Not too bad, all things considered. With classes starting (stress) & blizzards & driving there/back to FLA & eating weird in FLA & not drinking my gallons of water a week & well, a full moon & TOM, I'm not too crazed. Trust me - upon arrival home a week ago, I was 140 easy, but you have to take those fluctuations with a grain of salt...no pun intended. Back to the water, back to the eating better, back to the studies, back to fitting in healthy parts of the day for myself - even if it's pushups & situps at this point...I'll do them to maintain right here.
Update: 03/23/10 - 136.5
HOLY COW - almost a month since I updated this part. Same old same old with school work...except for the virus that hit me & 2 of the 3 kids for 3 days...all better now. I did go up to 140, but fluctuations happen, and then the virus hit...well, now I'm back down again - lol! Still trying to find balance with exercise. It's hard to balance everything with these 2 classes, I will not lie. I'm working on doing 15 minutes of strength a night - my mini-goal so to speak. We'll see....
Update: 03/30/10 - 136
For the last week, my brain is going thru some sort of number dyslexia on the scale..136 is 163..137 is 173..it's so annoying!! I have to keep jumping off and on to double check...very weird. Maybe it's my brain still trying to wrap it's head around thinness...another very foreign concept for me no matter how long I've been maintaining. Or maybe it's the FULL MOON! I need clothes very badly...everything is now too big or stained, or overshrunk & old & stained. And even tho I'm thinner, I still don't like to shop for myself. I'm a mess!! ROFL I need the show "What Not To Wear" to come visit me!! LOL
Update: 4/15/10 - 137.7....Yup, a bit outta control
Everyone falls of the wagon....I fell off hard, rolled a bit, ate some cookies, rolled some more...then ate some brownies since God-knows-when...and then screeched to a halt with all the grace of an ostritch tripping over it's legs & tumbling head first. Darn those instigating Keebler Elves!! Darn me for keeping them in the house! Anywho...see it does happen...and then we get our heads screwed back on straight and we shake our feathers out and keep on moving forward. Sure, my panties were in a twist and uncomfortable, but hey, eventually, things calmed down and they got untwisted with a little effort...once again. Such is life...moving on....
Update: 05/28/10 - 135
It's been over a month since the last update. Goes to show you that time sure flies by in the blink of an eye. Lifestyle check....Took control back in the eating deptartment..tracking works like a charm - I highly recommend it!! I even saw 134.9 on the scale this week and flipped out - NEVER have I seen that number. Anyway, recently, I decided to make my new maintenance range 130-135. Why? well, I am only 5 foot 2...short; it will keep me in check eating wise, especially since I am a stress eater...and lets face it, I am more sedentary than ever before. LoL So right now, I am at the top of my maintenance range...works for me. In the meantime, my pushups and situps will suffice as my exercise. Good news - I am almost done with the first set of courses!!
Update: 06/28/10 - 137 - my body likes it here I guess! LOL
Yup, 137. The above statement has been hampered by socializing and my body must really like 137....it's been here for a WHILE now! ROFL. So just consider it a plateau that needs some serious busting. No worries - part of my maintenance is NOT wigging out about things and accepting things where they are at that point in my life. This is a hard thing to do...a learned thing...a tiring thing. BUT it will be done.
Update: 7/16/10 - 11th wedding annivesary...134.5
...and 2 days away from when I originally hit my goal weight of 150 two years ago! Crazy to even write that!!! On my 10th wedding anniversary, I weighed 153 and got back from a minibreak with the hubby and recommitted to get back to my 150. Couldn't imagine that I would go lower and hit 137 5 months later. But it goes to show you that long and slow, with periods of plateau/maintenance in between are not bad at all. I think each break resets your metabolism clock actually. It's the process of keeping it off in between that matters and what you do to restart the process again. I swear by tracking nutrition - and fitness, but mainly nutrition. Hey, I'm proof...why would I lie? Going to see if I can maintain a few pounds lower. I am exercising with my hubby now - in search of some muscletone! LOL We shall see......
Update: 8/08/10 - 137...My body's sweet spot
OK ...vacation, sangria....fun in general...FUN LIFE in general is what I am talking about. Hubby and I are in maintenance mode and my body LIKES 137...my logs on here are proof. Sure, I went down and thought I could stay there, but I like living my summer maintenance life right now. I talk about "maintenance" as what I can LIVE WITH for the rest of my life without killing myself tracking but eating right and being active but not exercising like a fiend. Is 137 it??? Maybe. Have I had a roller coaster of emotions about this subject recently? yup, you bet. Am I going to drive myself nuts about a great number like 137? nope. Is there room for improvement? always and forever, amen.
Update: 8/24/10 - 134.5
My mother-in-law has been in the hospital for over a week at this point, and my husband has been by her side while I stay at home holding down the fort...and that is AOK with me. In the past, my tendency to deal with stress and emotion was to eat...that has changed dramatically. NOW I tend to cook uber healthy and track what I eat because that is the ONLY part of this whole cicumstance that I can control. The benefits of this: my kids are eating better, I am eating better, I am making SURE I get in calorie range instead of under- or over-eating. To also deal with this stress, I have turned to my treadmill...and it is a savior. The benefits: me time & a more relaxed mom. The results: a few pounds lost...but in a healthy way. Cyclically (even without this family stuff going on), August is my bounce back to exercise month...right on schedule!! LoL
Update: 8/31/01 - 133.1
Mother in law is back at home and will fully recuperate. Husband is back and home and begins work tomorrow. I have been in "go get 'em" mode for the last 2 weeks...now that school is starting, we shall see how the exercise routine goes. I have never seen that number on my scale in my life...the healthy choices and exercise are the reason for the boost in metabolism after maintaining for so long. We shall see where this new journey takes me...I want more muscle definition and stronger bones...that is the mission on this leg of the journey......
Update: 9/22/10 - 133
A month of up and down...lots of parties, lots of watching and balancing. School is now in session for me & the whole family! We are running around doing soccer and scouts, and in general, so far so good. :)
Update: 9/25/10 -a day to note: size 4
Today I found my litle sister's DKNY skirt in a closet...it is a size 4, and since the size 6 pants I have been wearing seem a bit big, I decided to try the skirt on....and the darned thing FIT! perfectly too!! I can't tell you the last time, in my life, I had ever worn that size as an adult...never is the answer, and the answer of 4T as a kid does not count here! LoL So back in the closet I put it back...smiling the whole time...it's not mine you know...but maybe if I ask her, I can borrow it! :)
Update: 11/02/10 - 132 and holding steady
Holy cow, I have SO been off the radar for the month of October!! Life has been crazy busy here, between family, sports, scouts, school (everyone's) and fall festivities in general! Still holding steady in the weight dept...not so much in the exercise dept once again! Hey, at least I am consistently cyclical with my exercise!! LOL I am missing my Sparktime...and will soon be back in action...I promise! This place can't get rid of me THAT easily! :)
Update: 11/22/10 - I have no idea, 133 last I checked yesterday ;^)
Ahhh, Turkey Day is upon us!!! Ready, set, WATCH! Yeah, I will enjoy, embibe, and do the old plate push when I am full, no matter how much I have left on my plate. And until that day, I will be watching and eating properly to feel good and ready to tackle all of those temptations! Yes, even after a year of maintaining it is still the same old battle we all face...the neverending struggle. It does get easier the longer you do it...if that is any consolation...it does get easier. Enjoy your Thankgiving....I know what I am thankful for....Spark is on that list!!!
Update: 12/13/10 - 134.9 this morning - yeah I know
That isn't even from Thanksgiving!! Let's just say that a week ago, I was 131.5 (didn't post that one)and then baking began, and sampling, and home cooking my favorites, and no freggies in the house because I was too busy. Yes, even a chick on maintenance can have a really bad week. Add a Chanukkah party at my friends house, and WHALLAH! some pounds snuck back on without looking! Well, I know exactly what to do...track, pay attention, move...and then all will be right with feeling fine once again. It's amazing how horrible I felt after eating the other night. "Polite" eating is the worst when you go over someone's house and feel obligated to eat everything. I should have known better. Lesson learned....again.
Update 12/20/10 - back to normal - 132
back on the bandwagon...enough said
Update: 1/02/2011 - 134
back on the wagon ....for real.......
Update: 1/07/2011 - 132
Tracking food, drinking water, moving the body...amazing what cutting back on the cr@p and being on track does for the mind, body & spirit. Part of maintenance is learning when to put on the breaks and get back in control. Will admit that this was the worst season for me in a while...but looking back at entries, I've been there and done that before. It's just nice to know that it still works though. It's cyclical and should be noted as such.
Update: 02/04/11 - 130.9 - never saw that before
My hubby & I are working out together now...not at the same time, but he gets his hour and I get mine - and what is great is that there is no "Mom guilt" at all for the first time since I started this journey. THAT is a nice change. I have consistently worked out the last week and a half - every other day at least 30 minutes on the treadmill & some strength thrown here & there. I have also been tracking EVERY SINGLE THING - and SparkFitness has "screamed" in red at me 3 times to increase my calories in order to remain healthy. I listened. Why? Besides being hungry too...I wanted to prove a point that if you track and listen to Spark - it works and just makes sense. The result: another pound down & I'm not hungry anymore.
Update: 02/07/11 - 131 lbs - 3rd Sparkiversary
Great day....great run..great mood..the sun is shining...life is good :)
Update: 02/10/11 - 129 - huh??? What?
last week was my TOM and I just ate healthy as I could, tracked & exercised like "usual"...but I have to note this number now, because it has been there for 2 full days. Really? I've never even considered the 120s...EVER. Should I? is the question at hand. I have to ponder over this one...the other question is: Is it maintainable for my lifestyle? I guess it is time to reflect.
Update: 02/15/11 - 131 - that is better
So I have decided not to push that whole 120s thing. WHY? Well, I firmly believe in maintainable weight for one's lifestyle....call it equilibrium...call it set point. Whatever you call it, I think I like it right here. My sister's wedding is less than 3 months away...to play around right now is probably silly b/c dresses will be arriving any day. My concentration will be to keep up my fitness streak!! That will be just fine...a little more toned never hurt anyone!
Update: 3/2/11 - 129.2 - my birthday weight
Might as well log it in on this auspicious day right? It has been an interesting day - to recap: at work I felt brainless and ditzy for some reason, (ie.: my 2nd kid went to school without his backpack without me noticing until I got home from work), for snack I had some new dried fruit, at lunch I answered emails, after lunch I developed wicked gas pains that lasted way into my birthday sushi dinner - thru angelfood cake with berries - thru dropping my 2nd son off to cubscouts alone because I couldn't be in public....the evil culprit that caused the memorable hideous birthday gas was: the dried fruit. Note to self: skip dried fruit henceforth. Happy Birthday to me!! At least I can laugh about it! Woohoo!! Is this TMI???
Update: 03/10/11 - 128.2 on the scale...WHAT?
I guess I am dabbling with the 120s. Trend noticed: whenever I get off of normal living maintenance (non-tracking) and track AND exercise regularly, I drop weight. That is how I had gotten to each maintenance plateau I maintained for so long. To maintain, basically I should not exercise, but guess what? I have gotten into a bit of a routine now with that, and I am not going to stop. So I guess I have to figure this new part out. Everyone should have such a problem right? Maybe I'll just blame my husband b/c it's his fault he started exercising regularly & now I don't have Mom-guilt! LoL Nah...we're better for getting our exercise in. ;^)
Update: 03/29/11 - 129/130 - my "normal" which is just fine.
Took last week off of SP because of life's nuttiness. Whew, that last week was SO busy it wasn't even funny. Back to normal now....which now included kids sports and standing on a field. Joy, oh Joy. Part of it kills me to just stand there and do NOTHING. Might have to be the freak on the sidelines getting is lunges while the kids play their games.
Update: 04/12/11 - 129 still :)
Not much to say except I've been UBER moody this last half month. Lots of little things ticking me off...all the time (not good - actively working through them) and the weather is really affecting me. I want sun, and warmth and clear blue skies. Not a lot to ask for Mother Nature...we all need a break. Please? Some mercy!?
Update: 4/28/11 - 128 - Size 4 jean Just plain weird to me
Yup, I said it. Weird. Almost a grand total of 60 pounds lost. Might be for really real because goodness know back in the upper 180s I was NOT on the scale at all...except for the day I joined SP and every week after that...but even so, this 120 world is weird to me. Not even in high school. Come to think of it...not even in Jr. High. I think I skipped this range completely. Anyway...lots of things going on: My youngest sister's wedding is next week!!!! Planning on posting some pics after that one for sure...stay tuned!!
Update: 5/14/11 - 132 - yup...that is what the scale said today
My little sister's wedding was last week!!!! and family was in town for 5 of the 7 days....add a birthday and some wine drinking (a lot) and there we have it. Still in my "maintenance range" but still, on the higher side. So back to tracking I go to get my eating back under control. First things first is the wine..my new favorite thing for some reason! Not needed, but use it as a treat. Anyway, my sister's wedding was terrific! Everyone looked great! I will post a blog soon, as promised...just cannot find that before picture I wanted to post!! So very frustrating!!
Update: 5/22/11 - 128.5
Tracking working in all its glory! and the exercise slump has been lifted! Me and my darned cyclical exercising! I'm enjoying the runner's high when I can..feeling the need to have another honestly! I'm working on cutting back on the minutes per mile. Who knows...maybe a 5K WILL be in my future....
Update: 6/23/11 - 129.7
Rough month, believe it or not!! That scale was up...then down, up then down. Why? Socializing with alcohol. Alcohol = bloat & empty calories (I really have to remember that this summer - I love my wine now) AND I am back into an exercise slump, SO it is back to tracking to get my head back in the game. It never seems to end, does it? Well, time to inspire myself into an exercise high for this month coming up, that is all! At least I am consistently inconsistent! LOL
Update: 7/12/11 - 130.5
Up and down in maintenanceland! Typical. Well, last week I got to exercising again and then, after 2 days, I couldn't breathe deeply because of mucous infiltration! Darned air conditioning! thanks a lot! Me and my youngest are afflicted with a pseudo-chest cold. It's still lingering 1 week later. So very tired of it. I think the lack of sleep leading up to last week did not help my immune system at all. The remedy: go to bed earlier & rest up. Eesh...totally kills my motivation. Meh, it will come back again.....
Update: 7/22/11 - 131.5
Camping this week was stressful. The brakes on the truck went en route, a lightening cell scared the bajezuz out of us, the gnats were annoying, the kids who glommed onto us were annoying like the gnats after a while...it was hot...then when we left, the tailights on the trailer were on the fritz. Oh, and it's hot. BUT THE GOOD NEWS IS: I finally feel better after 2 months of a chestcold thingy!!!! I can breathe despite the humidity!! So that is a good thing. Got back onto the treadmill today, and it felt great for the first time in a long time...today is a new day/beginning. Took long enough to get here! LOL
UpdateL 8/2/11 - 130
So I have been working on working out in the morning...and have written it on the desk calendar instead of relying on Spark to remind me - for some reason, I like things on paper that I wrote down - call me archaic, but hey, it is working! So far, I have done all but one that I have written down! for me - that is progress!! However today, I am feeling slumpy, which is bad...going to have my coffee and do this thing right!!!!
Update: 135.3 - yup - you read that right
How I am feeling about this: well, some disappointment for sure, but no complete collapse into self-hatred...yet. Listen, life sometimes gets in the way....in the last month, I have been on an emotional roller coaster, with NO goal to speak of, a vacation that added to the stress, and every single week an occassion happening...add not tracking, not caring and stress eating to that and what do you have? the pefect storm for 5 solid pounds to come back on. I felt it in my clothes too...so now, before I creep waaaay out of my maintenance range, today is a new day to start healthy eating and exercisng...once again...
Update: 9/11/11 - 133.4
Attended our town's memorial service...words cannot express.
Update: 9/23/11 - 131.5
Walking with Leslie Sansone has kicked me into high gear and so far my experiment has led me into walking outside as well! Pretty neat.
Update: 11/01/11 - I have no idea - last I check it was 132.5
So Halloween is done...walking stopped. The month of October was icky over all...Leslie & I spend a lovely 2 weeks together, had a spotty 3 & 4th week of walking , and then, as per typical me - exercising took a break. BUT it is time to get moving again. On the upside of things, I have been running (yes you read that right - RUNNING) outside even at least 2 times a week, even in my lagging exercise phase...which means I really didn't lag, did I? Huh, I am just realizing this now! Hahaha! Oops. Forgive me, sinus meds make me 'off'. Yeah, sinus cold crept up on me too. Lovely stuff. Powering through it though with rest. I have never slept so much! Now on to Novemeber!!! My 20th HS reunion is in 25 days - let's see how we do this month!
Update: 11/9/11 - 131.9
(those tenths of a point are very important!) LoL
Wasn't that far off from my previous predicted weigh-in update. Noting TOM and full moon clashing this week. Going to lay low in life because if I don't...knowing me, I will get into some sort of kafuffle! So quiet, peaceful non-confrontational Annie it is....bascially carry on like I have no stress in life!! LoL As if!
Wishing my sister a very Happy Birthday today too!!! Love you and thank you for sending me the link to Sparkpeople - you saved my life!!
Update: 11/21/11 - 130.3
Made it through the weekend! Still abstaining from wine until Thanksgiving (1 glass allowed) & on my reunion on Friday, when all bets are off! It's party time!! Woohoo! No alcohol has been tough, I will admit, but impossible to forego - the empty calories NOT comsumed got me back down in my maintenance range and feeling fine once again. I signed up for my first 5K Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving Day morning...going to go into it semi -'cold turkey' with very little training. Hubby will be with me and we will finish it together - looking forward to that. :)
Update: 12/1/11 - 131.3 Starting the 5% Winter challenge
This should be interesting. Goals: make some new friends, inspire a few, help a few, learn some new stuff from others, work on the ol' cyclical exercising issue I have (LoL), keep trying to get more fruits & veggies in the kids mouths than not, only have wine on Dec 10th/11th weekend and Christmas Eve/Day. ...oh and New Years, of course!
Update: 1/1/2012 - 133.7 Happy New Year!!!
So I'm kicking the new year off a little bit up but still in maintenance range! So that is a good thing...we shall see what that scale says in a few days though - because there is that body lag that plays catch-up when one consumes food. No worries...going back to tracking and paying attention, that's all. Another day on maintenance! So this year, I have one goal ahead of me - June 2 is a 5K at our local airport....planning on doing that and getting a bunch of people who have never run to join me! Yes, it will be a challenge, but why not?!?!? Maybe it will inspire people to do something they never tried before, just like me and that Turkey Trot last November! Make it a great year everyone!!! Peace!
Update: 1/8/12 - 131.5
It just takes a bit of nutrition awareness to get things back to normal for me. But even in saying that and losing 2 pounds of "yuk" weight...I am honestly feeling yucky still. I had some girlfriends over for drinks on Fri night and my gut has not been the same. Time to really watch my nutrition because I know these warning signs all too well. January has been crazy mild too - time to take advantage of this lovely weather outside!
Update: 1/21/12 - 132.3
Annie got her groove back! Her exercise groove, that is! :)SOOO happy to have it back too...FINALLY! Yup, the life of a cyclical exerciser! (LoL) Got a really great hour long treadmill/hill workout yesterday and ran a bit too..new tunes help SO much!
Update: 1/28/12 - 131
Last weigh-in of the 5% Winter Challenge with the Starfish. Go Starfish! Right back where I was 8 weeks ago. It was fun getting to know a new group of people on here! I highly recommend doing a challenge on Spark - it gets one focused!
Update: 2/7/2012 - 135 on the scale - not surprised ;)
After the whole superbowl weekend where the Giants won (oh yeah baby!) I am totally not surprised...it's a lot of salt consumed AND it's a full moon tonight to boot! Time to do what I know - drink my water, eat light and fresh and move forward! Happy 4th Sparkiversary to me!!! Almost forgot about that!
Update: 2/23/2012 - 132.6
Right in range...kinda busy the last 2 weeks, sorry about becoming M.I.A.!!!
Update: 3/2/2012 - 39th birthday 132.8
Yup....39 today. Eating well, feeling good. Got a bike from my family!!! Can't wait to try it out! Woohoo!
Update: 3/22/2012 - will update tomorrow on weigh in morning....reminds me, OK? LoL ;)
Update: 04/12/2012 - 132.1
Not bad for post-period & post-travelling. Got a mini-run in the other day...felt so good to move! Off to go camping today with friends for 2 nights. Another non-Sparking chunk. Hoping all my Sparkfriends are well!
Update: 4/21/2012 - I have no idea
Well, after weekend after weekend...week after stressful week...it look like we have a stead-ish schedule until the rest of the year. Sure, there are things every single weekend that are pretty big, but the Communion is done, and that was a milestone in many may ways here. Time to start tracking and get back to "normal" - whatever that is considering that we are busy every.single.day.of.the.week. A plan is in action...now it's time to execute!
Update: 5/2/2012 - 133.3
Well - the plan to eat BEFORE all of the afternoon activities start is going AOK. Everyone is happy and the meal planning is helping a lot. Carving out that time to exercise is hard...I get why "soccer moms" complain so much now. I am determined to find a loophole though - sometime, somewhere, on a field, I will walk a half an hour while my kids do their thing! I will figure it out...oh yes, I will.
Update: 5/15/2012 - 132.3
Getting more active now...trying at least. I'm always 'active' but I don't neccessarily log all of my actions. Mowing the lawn is a new one and I actually like it! Shhh...don't tell my husband that! LoL Anyway....same old same old here in Maintenance!
Update: 6/8/2012 - 131.7
In between now and my last update - we had 2 camping trips...and 2 full weeks of full-on mega-stress because of one of them, motly because I was the wagon-master for the entire weekend. Somehow..I maintained, but not without issues. I consumes a LOT of nitrates & salt. So much so that my legs felt very strange - combine that with drinking less than I normally do, because of the situations, and it makes complete sense that my body would react in some way. It's sloooowly becoming better now with better and fresher eating. Thank God. Another lesson learned!
Update: 7/4/2012- 136.2 (post camping weigh-in)
EEEK!!!! (that's the sound of me when I fall off the wagon, ignore my tracking and then weigh-in...hoping for the best, but expecting the worst) Soooo, I got the worst today (which is me being out of my maintenance range)..and on a holiday to boot!! LoL No worries, time to start nutrition tracking is all...and moving my body as well again in different ways, because evidently, mowing the lawn is just not going to cut it. ;)
Update: 7/13/2012 - 133.3
This is what tracking my nutrition does for me...and exercising too (not crazy stuff either - just treadmill and simple strength training). So now is when I have to keep doing what I'm doing to make it stick once again. I'm sure as heck feeling better overall too. :)
Update: 8/10/2012 - 133.8
Basically...I am up a pound in my maintenance range of 130-135...I was hovering around 132 forever, but I guess life and all that goes on, a pound was put on and doesn't want to budge! Which can bring one to the question: Are you upset? the answer is this simple: no. Why would I be upset? So what if it's not 132, especially since I was doing more active things and it's most likely a muscle weight gain. One measly pound is not something to obsess over. You can't....or else you will lose your mind. (Watch, now that I wrote this, I will be 131 tomorrow - LMAO!) Maintenance ranges are there for a reason - as long as you try to keep within that range..as long as your clothes are still looking good on you...well, my friends, life is good.
Update: 9/11/2012 - 134
If you only knew what was going on this last month....up and down and up and up and It hit 137 at one point. Stress and lack of sleep have been the cuprit there....eating really has not been that hideous. But now I am moving cords of firewood and tracking food once again....I swear by tracking nutrition..it really does make a HUGE difference in my behavior towards things in general. My goal right now is to get back to 132...not a huge goal at all, but at least it gives me more wiggle room in the maintenance range than 134!
Update: 10/24/2012 - 133.1 - trust me it was higher
Rough rough eating month. I blogged about stress - changes - etc.etc. And I got up to 135..and that is on the high side and my self-esteem went into the toilet and I could actually FEEL and RECOGNIZE old "oh well, why not" behaviors setting in. BUT I stopped them after a few days of feeling things out (things take time - another motto I have adopted) and I got back in control this week. Seems that I needed another thing for myself to look forward to. Thanks to a phone call from my SIL, we are doing a 5K Turkey Trot this year - totally her idea...and for that, I am most grateful. She gave me the oomph I needed to get rocking again. So the food is under control and the road work is starting...when I can fit it in.
Update: 11/29/2012 - 132
Well...really today it was 131.9, but who's counting tenth. I drink some coffee and that tenth is gone! LoL So it's been a month since the last update here. Wow. LOTS of changes going on...and the number on the scale has gone up and down, up and down. I think the highest was 135 a few weeks back. No worries - tracking nutrition keeps me in line. I pseudo-ran a 5K on Thanksgiving with my SIL and had a few good laughs since we did it "cold turkey" - and after that - I got a bad cold! Yay! family sharing germs as well as turkey! Sweet! But it's all good. Life is busy now, and that is on par with the holiday season.
Update: 12/21/2012 - have no idea 132? pants are big :)
but I am sure happy to see I received a Popular Blog Post and that the Mayans were wrong!!! ;^) Thanks Spark Friends!!! Thanks Mayans!!
Update: 12/23/12 - 133 - not too shabby! considering this time of year! LoL
Update: 01/04/2013 - HAPPY NEW YEAR - 133.3
OK ok...135.5 was what I had on 01/01/2013, but I don't really like to count that because of all the holiday bloat. So all in all, not to shabby for a holiday season!! Woohoo!! Rockin' the maintenance like a champ! Woohoo! LOL
Update: 01/10/2013 - 132.5
Tracking nutrition - yup, works like a charm! :)
Update: 02/01/2013 - 131.1
The last 2 weeks were ROUGH and now this week, is much better... pre-moon syndrome, full moon, PMS and stress last week were TERRIBLE.. so now I am glad that things are feeling more normal here. Tracking my nutrition keeps me focused and calmer than when I am not... something to remember.
Update: 02/07/2013 - 131.1 Happy 5th Sparkiversary to me!
Between this weigh-in and the previous one, I was up two pounds, down two pounds, up and then down...I was wondering where I would be today! LOL Fluctuations are a part of life..that is all. Remember that..I sure do!! Yesterday I signed up for a 5K at the end of March. It's at my high school and I went to my alumni friends to see if anyone wants to join me! Why not?! If I get a few people - the more the merrier! and it's a mini reunion of sorts! Wow....5 years... can't believe it... Thanks Spark Guy Chris for starting this website... it's a life saver!
Update: 2/26/2013 - 130.8
Up and down in maintenance range I go. Super duper stressful lately... cannot even say I am in a happy mood for the last few weeks, but venting a little helps a lot - thanks Sparkfriends, for being there and listening. Turning 40 in a few days..and I don't even care, that is how stressful life has been. Oh well...moving forward....
Update: 03/12/2013 - I have no idea
We went away, ate a lot, celebrated with another weekend of parties, next week is St Pat's day...and then, my 5K... Holy moley I am so behind in my "schedule" to train etc, etc!!! Anyway, letting this whole weighin thing some down to this - today at midday I was 135 and not surprised in the least... mid day, after workout, full of lunch and water... it's par for the course really. On the positive side, I ran 2 miles in 27 minutes - that is without doing ANYTHING AT ALL for months, so I am happy (very happy actually) that I am not such a schlub after all! LOL Bring on the 5K!!!
Update: 04/02/2013 - 137.5 AHHHHH!!! (LoL)
Haven't seen that number in AGES!! Totally out of my Maintenance Range and I know why: March was a party month...yup, a big fat party month! But now that is over and done with, along with all of the damage! LOL Time to buckle down once again. Such is life! The good thing is is that I trained for a 5K and can now run 2 miles straight, so with the nice weather, that is going to be a mini-goal for every nice day off of work... that and drinking my 8 glasses and tracking nutrition. Speaking of work, things are changing on that front in a few months, I have to set some goals there too. Baby steps...baby steps...all in due time!
Update: 04/18/2013 - 132.5
I track my nutrition...and whallah...like magic. Back in range.
Why aren't you tracking again? It's too hard? That. is. bull$hit. Just do it already.
Update: 05/22/2013 - 135
Over a months since I updated this?? EEK!! Ok, as you can see I am up in my maintenance range. Working on getting back to the midrange that makes me happy. Life is a bit crazy, so I am going to keep tracking so I don't lose focus on the positive...and for me tracking is positive while no control at all is negative. Does that make sense? Anyway, that's the plan...
Update: 06/07/2013 - 133.4
Back in range because I am tracking nutrition and being very active - mowing the lawn, gardening, cleaning the pool. I actually saw 137.5 on Monday and was determined not to flip out...so I kept on with my nutrition tracking and water drinking and the bloat came off in a few days. That's all it was too....bloat. Chips + alcohol = bloat. Simple as that. That is what a party filled weekend and the TOM will do to a body. Be reasonable and rational when things happen....flipouts don't help you at all.
Update: 08/28/2013 - 133 and holding steady
It's been crazy here with the whole "life transition" into full time part-time working mom. There is the potential here to work 6 days a week and nights. Kinda scary when you also want to be healthy! I haven't found my balance yet in that department...I can see why people have such a hard time though... You never know until you walk in their shoes! Counting blessing that I lost my weight when I did now - the environment was my own and condusive to my obsessiveness with it then...and I am thankful for that. That being said..gonna snuggle on the couch with my coffee with my other blessing before I go to work!
Update: 09/19/2013 - 132
Holding steady at 132. Working part time feels like full time between the new crazy hours and kids going back to school. My side business adds an extra days pay to each week which is a nice thing when a day falls apart at work and your hours get cut back...and that is all part of the business I am in. Eating is OK - not perfect, but OK. Exercise is nil. I really want to get in shape for the Turkey Trot...but I haven't figured it out yet! So much goes on in between working & not working that is it truly hard to fit in. I get how some people get so frustrated and obsessive about their exercise. I'll figure it out! I will! LOL
Update: 10/01/13 - 131.5 Holding my own
Work schedule becoming more routine. School schedule becoming more routine. Hubby is the savior for all of the late night's I work...some are on schedule, some are randomly thrown in. I live for the weekends I don't have to work. Sunday truly is a day of rest in this house - football, family, fun. Exercise still is abysmal, but having hope that I can figure a treadmillnwalk in now that the basement is back in functioning order...what I mean by that is this year was: refurbish burner, sludge cleanup from sewer overflow & this month - A NEW WASHING MACHINE! YAY! Merry Christmas to me! LOL But really, it's time to reclaim my dungeon....when is the only matter at hand...
Update: 10/15/13 - 131
Took the plunge and enrolled in a Health Coach Training program. Figuring it will get me closer to where I want to be in life...and to refocus on my passion instead of feeling suffocated with indecision. It's going to take a year...might as well start now!!
Update: 11/25/13 - 131
School is going well - trying new things, but sticking to what works for me...which is basically the point: when you find something that works, well, stick with it! LOL I can use a pressure cooker now and I want my own for Christmas :) It's really a handy, healthy tool - nothing to be scared about if you use it according to the directions! :) And my family is cool about trying new things. I am super busy, but it's all for the future good. I can honestly say things are AOK...and I am happy with where like is right now...but I also see change in the future, and that makes me happy too!
Update: 01/15/2014 - first update of the year!! 131.5
New Year...NEW JOB!... Maintenance status quo! Relearning an old trade is challenging and fun, learning how to eat for 9 to 5 is new and challengins...and not so fun. But my support system is great and a good breakfast is half the battle! Health Coaching coarse is good and I am learning a lot - I pressure cook now (love it!) and I have a nutribullet (I would rather chew my food though - so it will be only used on occassion)
Update: 3/22/14 - holy moley - 132
I really slacked on updating this part of my page. On average, this is my status quo: 132 and holding steady, depending on the day. I did dip into the 120s in Feb, but really, I don't want to be there. I like it where I am here in between 130-135. 132 makes me happy when I see it on the scale. This is where I belong.
Update: 6/22/14 - 134
Ummm..3 months since last update on here? How embarrassing! Busy busy busy is what is going on. Will totally admit that I am struggling a bit too...mentally... things are changing and I have to think about things and reassess once again!! That is the part that is always always constant: reassess...even if it is week, by week. Listening to how my body feels is important and I should listen to it more often.
Update: 7/18/14 - 135
Somehow, I gained 3 to 4 pounds and this time...they feel like sticking around! LOL Can't say it isn't a challenge to get these suckers off this time around...I do miss seeing my usual 132 on the scale, and I hate my "back fat" part for some reason now... I feel that it's prominent like a zit on my nose that won't go away! :P Anyway...I am trying, and eating more veggies, especially at work now. Summer helps with eating healthy. There have been a ton of party weekends and eating out to celebrate...it's time to reign that all in!
Update: 7/27/14 - 137 - hello old number...hello tight pants
Oh yeah...reigning it in has been an up-hill battle... what can I say, we have hit a rough patch here in maintenanceland... and not only me, my hubby as well. Wondering if it's the honeymoon effect now that I have a steady job and we are not as stressed about money, or if we are coping with the life change and the after effects are hitting now...like jet lag. We are acutely aware of it, and are slowly working on it in our own way before things get out of control. I will have to say this too: we are getting older! This can be the x-factor that is new to us! LoL Always re-assessing - it's what we have to do! But I am very determined to get back in my range again, because I felt better there than any other time...things just take patience and time!
Update: 9/6/14 - 136.7
I started a challenge which I put a start weight of 138..prior to that I saw 140 that flipped me out. Truly. I have entered the realm of trying to lose the same 5 pounds over and over again!! When and why that came about, I have no idea why, but it definitely is a mindset that needs to be addressed/broken because I feel like the "old me" ---- the new me is not hip to that jive! LoL
Update: 10/6/14 - 137 still
....not budging, not trying hard enough...and that's ok for now.
Update: 12/30/14 - 138
Ugh...not happy...not surprised either. Time to get real again...take control and make 2015 a healthier year!
Update: First real one of 2015 - 1/17/15 - 135.3
I got up to 141 after all was said and done with holidays and vacations - so on 1/5/15 that was logged on to my home calendar...and hubby and I got back to eating basics again: pre-planning meals, food prep, being more conscious of snacking, and for me....back to exercise WITH NO PRESSURE as long as I get something in when I am thinking of it on that day. So far...things have been working. Sundays are prep days, and will remain so if I have anything to do about it!!! LoL Anyway - I am back to being more active here on Spark...because it works and because I miss people!!
Update: 01/23/15 - 132.7 Back in Mx range!
On the right path....have been doing a 2 mile run every other day along with tracking my food... it works! LoL Nothing fancy, just nutrition and movement! Happy to say things are good...feeling better than I have in a long time. I like the endorphin hangover I get the next day....keeps me calm. I like that. Going to use it more! Remembering that little bit helps!
Update: Holy cow...it's been that long?!?! 5/27/15 - 138.8
And waaaay out of mx range. See blogs for crazy life stuff that happened. But now...I'm back and focusing on the good...not the bad or the ugly. :)
Update: 6/7/15 - still at 138
In the past 2 weeks - eating way better, in range, tons (and I mean tons) of fruits and veggies...and yet...not one bit of movement on the scale. I have to accept the fact that in our 40s things change metabolically...I might be in one of those phases of life! As discouraging it can be, I'm not going to get down on myself. Feeling better matters - it's a NSV! And hubby and I are in this together...and that makes all the difference in many many ways. Dirty girl mud run is in 7 weeks...no training going on here, just moving and shaking to stay fit. And that's another thing...I am FIT! Cardio-wise, I am great! Strength training needs to become part of my routine for better bone health in the loooong run.
Update: 8/16/15 - 136.6
And I was 142.9 a few weeks ago.....let's just get that out of the way. Updating here has been lacking so, I might as well note things today - 8/8/15 was the dirty girl mud run (so much fun) - 8/9 was fishing on my friends boat and that night I got sick - 8/10 was spent in the ER getting tests done. I call it a "Bile duct attack" but the docs are inconclusive. 3 doses of painkillers fot me over the edge and now, 6 days later, I'm back to normal but on a self-inflicted restricted diet....and 5 pounds down to 136.6. NOT exactly the way I wanted to kick off healthy eating but it is what it is. This happened in 2007 when I was heavy, so I kinda know what the pain is, but I have a different set of doctors and they don't know it yet....thank god for hospitals and their record keeping! Anywhooooo......I'm back in the saddle - no coffee, no processed foods, limited sugar, limited fats, limited dairy. It's scary to eat right now, but it's part of the recouperation process. Been here....done this! LoL
Update: 8/29/15 - 133.1
Back in my favorite range! The elimination of all of the above truly has been a blessing in disguise. I miss cheese though. I don't miss coffee, or alcohol, or high sugar stuff. And I've been going out to eat to, just making way better choices, and always always getting a salad instead of fries. Not really exercising either....at all. I'm too busy to get guilt over that one. It'll be there when I need to get moving again, like I always do.
Update: 9/5/15 - 132
Haven't seen that number in a while! I've introduced cheese back, so at least my eggbeater with a smidge of cheddar is a bit nicer in the morning now! Still staying away from high fats. Happy to report that wine was introduced as well (insert happy dance) but I'm very wary of just going whole hog on that, or anything introduced back in for that matter...I'm just being precautious. I abstained from it today which happened to be my son's birthday party with family. Wine bottle is still chilling in the fridge! I'm 10 pounds down from a month ago. Clean eating is what people call it. Yeah....I guess it is. It's not as hard as you'd think...like anything, it becomes part of what you just have to do in order to feel better.
Update: 9/12/15 - 131.6
Holding steady and feeling fine. :)
Update: 10/2/15 - 129.5
Have been hanging out here for the last week...might as well log it as a landing spot. It's fine so far....I'm not starving myself...actually, I'm eating a lot, just differently. Still no coffee, limited alcohol. Everything else, I've dabbled with in moderation. But 90% of it is pretty darned spot on as being under the category of unprocessed. Have I tracked calories? Not this time around. Going with my gut...literally and figuratively! Food is fuel...the better the fuel, the better I feel. Not doing anything weird, trendy or gimmicky either. Saw my BFF last Friday...she told me not to lose any more weight or I'll start to look sick (love our brutal honesty - that's why she's my bff) , and I'm not. I've said it before 130-135 is a good range. Maybe the range will just be adjusted to 129-134, that all. ;) But I do need to buy new pants....
| current weight: 129.3
Member Since: 2/7/2008
Fitness Minutes: 24,319
The Start weight -187
5 ft - 2 in. tall
Original Goal weight - 150 7/18/08 - DONE!!!!
Maintained 146-150 for ONE YEAR!!! YAY!!! 7/08-7/09
50 pounds DONE!!! 11/18/09 - 137 lbs.
More pounds if my body lets me. I'll re-evaluate when I get there. I have not been 150 since high school, so I really don't know what lower than that feels like - and it kinda scares me. I have comfort zone issues! ;)
So here's the deal with all this re-evaluation:
- I refuse to let myself go over 150 for the rest of my life if I can possibly help it.
- 150 is a good and happy place - I'm glad I maintained well there
- 140s were a very nice to be in :)
- 137-139 - love it...Maintained a long time
Summer 2010 - reached Normal BMI weight of 136!!!
- 130-135 maintenance range for remainder of 2010 and into next year.
- 128/129 is the uber-low for me..maintainable?? Nope...not really.
-2013 - still in 130-135 r
WARNING!!! I am a cyclical exerciser! LOL I admittedly go in spurts depending on what's going on with life. The main point is that I always go back to it. That is an accomplishment in and of itself!
LOVE my treadmill but I have also learned to love strength training this past summer. I use 10 pound dumbells, a resistance band and a stability ball. LOVING the results. In fact, it's easier to get in than the 30 minute cardio!
10/09 - discovered running! LOL I LIKE it! Why am I putting it here? because it will remind me that I like it! :)
11/24/11 - Ran first 5K in 34 minutes! Yay!
Mom to 3 wonderful boys (13,11,9) - they keep me and hubby VERY busy.
Husband is great - no complaints there and never will be, because I'm a lucky girl to have found him.
I love love love to laugh and smile. I don't think people do that enough. I don't take little things for granted. I try to say 'thank you' and 'your welcome' because manners are a dying art.
I'm always here if you need a hand....just ask.