FATASHNOMORE   8,845
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April '14













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"Fat Ash" no more!

From the title above one might conclude that my name is Ashley. Indeed, this is correct. And while my inner analyst/feminist/intellectual bristled at the scoff-worthy concept of creating a username that sounds much like the ever derogatory “fat ass,” I decided to keep it as is. The truth is, there really is a war waging between what we know and what we feel. Am I over-weight? Yes. I know that. Am I all of the things that the word “fat” has come to stand for (dirty, lazy, ugly, and unlovable)? ...
From the title above one might conclude that my name is Ashley. Indeed, this is correct. And while my inner analyst/feminist/intellectual bristled at the scoff-worthy concept of creating a username that sounds much like the ever derogatory “fat ass,” I decided to keep it as is. The truth is, there really is a war waging between what we know and what we feel. Am I over-weight? Yes. I know that. Am I all of the things that the word “fat” has come to stand for (dirty, lazy, ugly, and unlovable)? No. I know that, too. But unfortunately sometimes I still feel like crap because of what I weigh. So when I say “Fat Ash No More” I mean I want to lose weight, of course, but regain something far more valuable in the process- a new mentality. (Besides, it's also kind of an oxymoron given that no matter how big I get, the butt of my jeans will always be baggy. My fat thinks it needs to take a detour and heads straight for my stomach. My body type is not Apple, nor Pear, nor Hourglass. Alas, it is Marshmallow-On-A-Stick!)

I have weighed 286 pounds, 164 pounds, (and it goes without saying) everything in between. I lost 126, regained 45, and am finally creating a new Spark People profile because I am finding it difficult to quiet the deafening shame fest in my head. I am searching for accepting, optimistic, supportive, and altogether uplifting weight loss friends whose clamor will perhaps be more positive.

Albert Einstein once said, “We can not solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.” My mentality as of late has been rather backwards. I keep telling myself I will approve of myself when I get “there,” wherever the hell “there” is. In reality, I will continue to go nowhere (and possibly even go backwards) until I give myself some of that unconditional love stuff. Needless to say, Mr. Einstein would be mortified.

So no more compulsive overeating, fat-shaming, and self-doubting and/or loathing. It’s depressing and unproductive. Sooooo let the body acceptance, health, and blogging begin. :)
Read More About FATASHNOMORE (Updated July 11)


Current Status:
FATASHNOMORE I think it's time for a change. :)
set 1 day ago


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 current weight: 220.6 
 
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Member Since: 6/8/2013

SparkPoints: 8,845

Fitness Minutes: 4,730

My Goals:
Starting Weight: 286 lbs.

280 - Accomplished
275 - Accomplished
270 - Accomplished
265 - Accomplished
260 - Accomplished
255 - Accomplished
250 - Accomplished
245 - Accomplished
240 - Accomplished
235 - Accomplished
230 - Accomplished
225 - Accomplished
220 - Accomplished

My newest goal is to create a list of goals this week that have nothing to do with a number on a scale. :)



My Program:
I would like to be able to say that I:

-Get 6 - 8 hours of sleep/night
-Drink 8+ glasses of water on a daily basis
-Eat approx. 1500 calories a day
-Prepare meals at home
-Sodium conscious
-

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Member Comments:
SAMMI-SAM
2/18/2014 3:13:56 PM

Holy 5k!! Great job! Was it hard?



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JOIFULJOI
2/4/2014 1:09:53 PM

Hope you're doing well sweetheart!

xx



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CORKYTHEMOM1
1/14/2014 7:36:19 PM

emoticon Ashley! CONGRATULATIONS on running the 5k! WOOHOO!! Think of healthy living as a career. Make goal setting a regular part of your life. Become a permanent participant in sustaining better lifestyle choices. Focus on one goal at a time to become a healthier you. Develop an action plan for each goal and finish what you start. Each positive change will lead you to better results. You CAN and WILL turn your GOALS into the results that you are striving for!


emoticon G = Give each goal 100% of commitment from beginning to completion!
emoticon O = Open your mind to new ways of doing new things!
emoticon A = Add variety to nutrition plan, fitness activities and inner well-being goals!
emoticon L = Live life embracing healthy choices, positive changes and personal growth!
emoticon S = Strive to exceed daily with a combined mind-body-soul balance!


~ Monika ~ emoticon



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PIXIE-LICIOUS
1/5/2014 4:27:45 PM

Success is a Choice
-Unknown
"Today I will make many choices, and each will have a consequence. Today I can choose to tell myself that I am worth the effort, or I can tell myself doesn't matter, I'll do it tomorrow. Today I can choose to journal, or I can choose not to. Today I can choose to drink my water, or I can choose to be
dehydrated. Today I can choose to stay in my points range, or I can choose to hinder my goals. Today I can choose to be more active, or I can choose to take the easy way. Today I can choose to be motivated, or I can choose to tell myself "I can't." Today I can choose success. IT IS MY CHOICE."
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
Stopping by to wish you a great week, Sparkfriend! Keep doing your best to reach your goals...its up to you, and you know you're worth the effort, right?
Hugs,
Pixie




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OHMEMEME
1/3/2014 8:16:06 PM

Hi Ashley! Stopping by to check on Spark friends. Life can be tough. Weight issues are not so important compared to the real issues of emotional eating. I can relate ...and have not experienced anything near as tragic as your life lessons. Sorry for your sorrows and will keep you in my prayers. Deal with the issues then establish healthy eating and exercise habits. Don't beat yourself up about it. Slow and steady! Keep Sparking! emoticon emoticon



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