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A photo of me at 320lbs with my two day old baby boy. Edited for public viewing.
Abi DOES where dresses and wedges.
This is the one where Kegan looks the LEAST goofy...He is photogenic, but more silly.
I have 30 pics in my gallery
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Being Honest This Time Around...
I'm coming clean. I have to. It's time. Maybe if I do, I will be more successful with my weight loss. I first joined sparkpeople.com when my little baby boy-my second child-was just about 2 months old. I had high hopes, and I did GREAT at losing weight. I tracked everything. I didn't totally let bad days get in the...blah blah blah blah...I did my best to encourage other people. Secretly, though, I was totally going about losing weight the wrong way, and in probably one of the most unhealthy ...
I'm coming clean. I have to. It's time. Maybe if I do, I will be more successful with my weight loss. I first joined sparkpeople.com when my little baby boy-my second child-was just about 2 months old. I had high hopes, and I did GREAT at losing weight. I tracked everything. I didn't totally let bad days get in the...blah blah blah blah...I did my best to encourage other people. Secretly, though, I was totally going about losing weight the wrong way, and in probably one of the most unhealthy ways. I was bulemic. I was never diagnosed with it, because I never talked about it-but come on. I would feel immensely guilty-not because of what I ate or how much I ate-but BECAUSE I ate. I felt because I was so fat, I didn't deserve to eat. I loved food too much. I hated food. I KNEW the truth. I knew what I needed to do. However, I abused laxatives. I would take as many as TWELVE senna-based laxatives at one time, sometimes a couple times a day. My father was prescribed furosemide, 80mg, because he retained water around his heart. I abused those, too. I took...stole...them from him. He had enough, but still. It's the principle of the thing. One time, and only one time, I took six 80mg tablets in one sitting, and lost 22 pounds of water in ONE night. I nearly passed out the next day while I was taking a shower. I probably should have asked my mother to rush me to the hospital, but that would mean I would have to admit to having a problem, and who wants to do that?
It should really be no surprise to me that after aggrivating an already bad knee by re-injuring it in 2007 that I very quickly began gaining the weight back. I've gained back almost every pound that I lost over the course of 5 years. I can't do this anymore. I can't be big like this anymore. However, if I am going to lose weight, it has to be about health and not the number on the scale. Even if it takes me three YEARS to get down to 200 pounds...dammit, I am going to do it and do it right.
I am soooo tired of being tired! I am NOT lazy. I still do housework. I clean, I do dishes, I do laundry, I cook...I'm college student (on-line courses), too. Still, it does not take that long to finish cleaning the house for maintenance. I am going to do this.
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| current weight: 272.5 |
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Profile
Member Since: 4/11/2006
SparkPoints: 37,149
Fitness Minutes: 13,766
My Goals:
To maintain my curves while maintaining a smaller size.
To love myself for all that I am.
To be proud of myself for all I have accomplished.
To learn from my past mistakes and not repeat them.
My Program:
Staying within my calorie ranges more times than not.
Getting off my fatbutt and getting some active exercise for at least 30 minutes at least every other day.
Strength training with dumbbells, and various other exercises 3 non- consecutive days a week.
Not allowing bad days to be the end of my efforts and trying not to be more harsh on myself anymore than I would on anyone else.
Personal Information:
Here goes:
Born during snow storm, December 8, 1977
Daughter to 2 great parents, Shelley and Ansel.
Sister to 2 (caugh, hack, sputter)great siblings, Benjamin and Cassia
Mom to 2 great children-who I am super blessed to have in my life, Lakeiah and Kegan.
and love their father since May of 1998.
Other Information:
I have recommitted to sparkpeople-resetting everything. I am tired of not exercising. I am tired of being humungus-again. I am tired of having such a difficult time finding clothes in my size THAT I LIKE and that suit me! I am tired of not being healthy-again. I am tired of not having as much energy as I need for my kids.
(I wrote this in 2011-but it still applies)
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