I graduated this past spring, and I originally started this journey 56 weeks ago. I don't have much to show for it so far as weight-loss but I am no worse off then when I started originally.

Physically and emotionally I am in a totally different frame of mind. I finished a half marathon last summer (I had to walk most of it, but I did it), and ran an entire 5km race (CIBC Run for the Cure). I finished this years run for the Cure 4 minutes slower then last year.

It was ...

I graduated this past spring, and I originally started this journey 56 weeks ago. I don't have much to show for it so far as weight-loss but I am no worse off then when I started originally.

Physically and emotionally I am in a totally different frame of mind. I finished a half marathon last summer (I had to walk most of it, but I did it), and ran an entire 5km race (CIBC Run for the Cure). I finished this years run for the Cure 4 minutes slower then last year.

It was a summer in turmoil, I moved and lost track of why I wanted to be healthier. I stopped running and pretty much went to the run without preparing at all.

Emotionally I am much more comfortable in my own skin. I recognize the extra weight I carry isn't healthy but I am not loathed to exist and I feel safe to take up space on this planet. I am worth it. I am still struggling with body image and self-confidence even still but I am trying to be positive and stop fat-talk.

I've dragged my boyfriend along for the ride this time, and while I am trying the C25K program, we are also doing trying to do Power90. I dance once a week for 5 hours ing ATS Belly Dance and a Folkloric style, and I try to practice that twice a week outside of class.

We've both agreed we need to be healthier, and working together we can support each other easier.

Outside of needing more activity day to day, I need to measure my portions more. Not only am I eating the wrong things usually, I am eating too much.

That being said, I have issues with food. I'll binge, then feel bad and binge based on emotions. I am working on this, and have started walking away from situations that stress me out before the urge to eat gets too strong. I am also researching food habits to help avoid cravings and I find having structure to my diet make it easier to avoid the binge. I think we are going to try the South Beach diet, which helps with both weight loss and blood pressure and cholesterol management.

I know this is a long term journey and I am not going to give up. Whether it takes me 9 months or 9 years, the small changes I make now will me a happier me in the long run.

I know this will be hard, I don't want to have this handed to me.

I am strong, proud and confident. I also know I cannot do this with out everyone's help, support and the motivation you all share.
My thanks for all you do.

Seven Rules of Motivation
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#1 Set a major goal, but follow a path. The path has mini goals that go in many directions. When you learn to succeed at mini goals, you will be motivated to challenge grand goals.
#2 Finish what you start. A half finished project is of no use to anyone. Quitting is a habit. Develop the habit of finishing self-motivated projects.
#3 Socialize with others of similar interest. Mutual support is motivating. We will develop the attitudes of our five best friends. If they are losers, we will be a loser. If they are winners, we will be a winner. To be a cowboy we must associate with cowboys.
#4 Learn how to learn. Dependency on others for knowledge supports the habit of procrastination. Man has the ability to learn without instructors. In fact, when we learn the art of self-education we will find, if not create, opportunity to find success beyond our wildest dreams.
#5 Harmonize natural talent with interest that motivates. Natural talent creates motivation, motivation creates persistence and persistence gets the job done.
#6 Increase knowledge of subjects that inspires. The more we know about a subject, the more we want to learn about it. A self-propelled upward spiral develops.
#7 Take risk. Failure and bouncing back are elements of motivation. Failure is a learning tool. No one has ever succeeded at anything worthwhile without a string of failures.

Goals Set
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1. Slowly obtain an healthy weight/BMI/size
- This can be done in mini stages of 5lbs til I reach a point I can maintain without feeling deprived and life can occasionally get in the way. Aim for 5lbs every month and the long term in 9 months.
2. Complete the C25K program
- I can repeat weeks as I need but I really want to finish this. If I am able to avoid repeating weeks, it takes 8 weeks; I know I am fairly sedentary though so it will probably take more time, I am setting a 12week maximum. (I've restarted this program, and will be trying to complete it despite the snow that will be falling soon.)
3. Increase mileage/speed after finishing the C25K program so I can continue to improve with running.
- This is not really specific, but I would love to finish a marathon in under 4.5hours. Seeing a half took me 3.5hours, I have a way to go. This I expect to take months, for now I will wait to set a time goal.
4. Pay off school debt and save for a down payment for a house
- Not weight related but a long term goal of being financially healthy as well. I would like to be financially stable in 3 years, and have a down payment in 5years. This may change, but long term focus usually does.

"Did I eat well today??? Did I exercise today??? That's all I need to be concerned about. The scale and the clothes will take care of themselves." ~ VOICEOFTRUTH1

Nike Ad's (thanks DIVELLENT) !
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"If you went running when you first started thinking about it, you'd be back by now."

"Others aren't staring at you. They're thinking how they should be running, too."

"Someone who is busier than you is running right now."

"The road to hell is paved with couches."

"It's easier to sleep than run. That's why sleeping isn't an olympic sport."

"There are clubs you can't belong to, neighborhoods you can't live in, schools you can't get into, but the roads are always open."

"All your life you are told the things you cannot do. All your life they will say you're not good enough or strong enough or talented enough; they will say you're the wrong height or the wrong weight or the wrong type to play this or be this or achieve this. THEY WILL TELL YOU NO, a thousand times no, until all the no's become meaningless. All your life they will tell you no, quite firmly and very quickly. AND YOU WILL TELL THEM YES."

Read More About KAILIIA (Updated January 24)

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