Just wanted to spread a little encouragement for you! You CAN do this, you're stronger than you think you are.
If I can give you a tip?? Change your ticker so that your goal is 5 or 10 pounds, then it won't seem so daunting. As you reach the first 5 pounds you will feel such an accomplishment! Then just put another 5 or 10 pounds on it again. I did that starting in August 2012 and now I have lost about 40 pounds.
And keep coming back to SparkPeople to get a daily dose of motivation, tips, and to log your food.
My holiday wish to you, is for you to find love and peace in everything you do! May your days be merry and bright, spent with people who bring out your greatness!!! Merry Christmas Friend!!! ~Susana