I'm ready to lose some weight and change my lifestyle towards being healthy!

I had joined SparkPeople a while ago (2008), but never really used it and had all these excuses to not stick with losing weight. But I'm back and no more excuses I'm determined and ready to do what it takes to get to where i want to.

No more slacking off - Time to get back on track..I've got all the support I need & I know I can make it!

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ...

I'm ready to lose some weight and change my lifestyle towards being healthy!

I had joined SparkPeople a while ago (2008), but never really used it and had all these excuses to not stick with losing weight. But I'm back and no more excuses I'm determined and ready to do what it takes to get to where i want to.

No more slacking off - Time to get back on track..I've got all the support I need & I know I can make it!

★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

My story -

I remember since I was about 10 years old being referred to as "fat" in my class at school. It hurt me so much that I used to come home and cry. My family never really cared much about it. I felt like they always thought the same but never told me since they always tried to restrict what I ate. It didn't get till I was about 13, when my family started to call me "fat" or poke at my stomach. I was always the sensitive type so any comments about my body always got me and I would always have a breakdown. I remember that I would always feel depressed and whenever I told my parents they always thought I was crazy. But deep inside I always felt like I wasn't going to be accepted for who I am because of my weight and always be made fun of or not fit in with my cousins because of it. All the years after that started to get worse. I always thought that I was "fat" and I'm sure I had zero self esteem. I was never confident about my body, and even when my ex boyfriends would comment about being beautiful I never believed it or always brushed it off letting my perception of what other people said about me get to me.

The one person that a girl always expects to support her wasn't on my side. My mom constantly told me each day that I was "fat" or "shouldn't eat so much or at all" and compared me to other people. Whenever people made comments about my body to her she was always supporting them and never defended me. After realizing this I started to have anger against my mom. I started to talk back and always tell her to not look at me if it bothered her that much. It still sometimes gets to me. The fact that she was talking about my weight with others really hurt more than her making fun of me. Each time that I would talk to her she would look at me with a disgusted face and never focus on what I was saying but instead judge me for my body and poke at me. The worst was when family would use me as a joke. My cousin who moved here was the first time I ever got a sense of it. He would joke around about how he could feel me walking or that I was going to break him if I sat on him. I honestly did not think that I was that big compared to other people that I qualified as "obese"

Growing up with a younger sister who was thin wasn't the best thing. I always wanted to eat what she ate especially junk food. And I hated it when my parents would let me not eat the same or treat me differently. Shopping would always make me depressed, to the point where I hated being out in public. My friends in high school were always smaller than me but they never commented on my weight. Each time I got made fun of by my family or someone else I always let it get to me. I would break down and wish that I could be "skinny" and fit in.

I got married in July of 2012, and one of the worst feelings ever was not being accepted by your in laws. My own family already is constantly putting me down, but to go into a new family and get the same. I felt like there was no point and that I would never be loved for who I am. What was supposed to be the most happiest days of my life turned out to be the worst. My goal had been to be a healthy weight before my wedding day but I didn't make it. After the wedding the next couple of months were a tough struggle. I had become so depressed by being treated the worst in all my life from my new family and other families who met me for the first time. That I just decided to give up. Since then it's been a tough couple of months.

I have always tried to diet, but at the same time I would always start to take way to many cheat days. Being in university and the freedom to have any food I wanted didn't make it anybody. I was always encouraged by going out with friends since I wanted the full university experience. I'm pretty sure I gained more than the freshman 15! And I never wanted to work out because I would give up after a couple of days from lack of motivation. I also never enjoyed going to the gym because I was embarrassed. And to make matters worse I have Asthma so it was hard to figure out what I could do and not. But now being back on SparkPeople I've decided to devote myself to take advantage of all that it has to offer and benefit from it. I'm taking a journey on the road to being healthy and making great friendships on her along the way. I not only want to focus on the weight on the scale but transform myself towards and happier and gain my self esteem back. I'm doing this for myself. Yes I want to prove all the people who thought I wouldn't do it that I can. But the main goal is to working towards a better ME! =D

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Goals ♥ -
Get out of Obese category (179.5 lbs) -
Reward: New workout clothes
Get out of Overweight category (150 lbs) -
Reward: Get nails done
Get into Normal weight category (149.5) -
Reward: Bracelet as a reminder of how far along I've come.

Read More About STOLENHEART- (Updated February 19)

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