Life changes so quickly ....

Last summer I was planting a huge new garden in my side yard. I got a backache that would not go away. I thought it was because I was getting way out of shape and my eating habits sucked to say the least. We planted over 50 bushes and 300+ perennials after spending a good 6 months in the house hibernating over the winter in Chicago. Oh yeah, and I smoked like a little chimney. (I quit smoking 12/09/2008.)

I started to make changes ...

Life changes so quickly ....

Last summer I was planting a huge new garden in my side yard. I got a backache that would not go away. I thought it was because I was getting way out of shape and my eating habits sucked to say the least. We planted over 50 bushes and 300+ perennials after spending a good 6 months in the house hibernating over the winter in Chicago. Oh yeah, and I smoked like a little chimney. (I quit smoking 12/09/2008.)

I started to make changes (walking, quit drinking cokes, started taking a good lunch to work, etc) and thought I would be feeling better in no time.

Well ... things don't always work out as planned , In December 2008, I woke up one morning with more pain in my back than I thought was humanly possible. A trip to the ER confirmed something was terribly wrong, I was diagnosed with non-hodgkin's lymphoma - stage 3. I was 48 years old. When you are told you have cancer, everything changes .... there is no going back.

I did 6 chemo treatments and am now in remission. It was ugly but .... and this is the good part .... my life changed!!!

I realized I have the power to begin again!!!! Right now or anytime I want. I can't change the beginning of my story but I have the power to alter it at anytime by adding a new chapter,

I am a work in progress! This is not to say that my life has been bad or that I think I'm totally screwed up .... not at all! (Maybe slightly screwed up ... lol.) Life is good! I've had many successes and many failures. It's just that I haven't approached my weight/health issues with the same frame of mind that I use to conquer other areas of my life.

I ignored my health and it really did catch up with me! I was a workaholic who ate out of snack machines all day. I remember always having a coffee in one hand and a smoke in the other. We ate out most nights. The sick thing was that I thought I had it all ... I thought I had made it ... lol. Who knew that cancer could be good for you in the long run ... lol ... I may never have gotten around to taking charge of my life if I hadn't gotten it.

So, now I want to change but i know there will be lots of struggles ahead. I need to remember that it's the struggles that add the colorful moments to our life story. It's also what make us a hero in life to others. Really, think about it .... all those people you admire .... many had obstacles to overcome.

Nothing is sweeter than working hard to accomplish a goal and then getting there. Life is also hard ...obstacles will spring up (I'm a stubborn woman with lots of bad habits) , but I can get to where I want to go. If there is one thing thing I have learned it's that I am one persistent lady when I have my heart set on something.

I have every intention of meeting my goals and having fun doing it!

So ... now is the time to begin to tackle health issues. I guess I just want enough courage to change and determination to follow through. And on those days when I totally screw up I just want to remember that I can always begin again!

I spent a lot of time over a 6 month period to weak to do anything (even sitting up was a struggle). I needed a nap after taking a shower ...honest to God ...lol

All I could really do was think, pray, and contemplate. It was the first time in my life that I had TIME for myself (maybe not energy but time). I'm not sure how to say this but it was also one of the best times in my life because of all the time I had to think, pray, and contemplate.

I vow to make time for me everyday. There really is something to the 'it's all about me' mentality ... lol

I learned so much. I learned that it all really IS a GIFT. I'm happier now than I ever have been. I'm not a workaholic anymore (hope it's not because I'm not back at work .... lol).

I learned to start taking care of ME (physically and spiritually). I remembered that exercise is fun Eating good food tastes good. Getting enough sleep allows me to dream. Meditation helps me to connect to God. Deep breathing helps me chill out. I was reminded daily of what I was grateful for because I was in danger of losing it all.

Life really is FUNNY. Laugh as much as you can! Laughter even made my chemo bearable. I was there for 6 1/2 hours each time I had chemo so I learned to joke with everyone. One of the benifits was that the nurses all babied me when I needed it.

As far as I know for certain, this life is it (God knows I hope there is more but that's all based on faith and hope) so I need to make the most of what I have RIGHT NOW.

Oh yeah .... one more thing ... I learned that KINDNESS is all that really matters.

Believe it or not, I'm so grateful for all that I have been through. Life can change in an instant but life is also a wonderful teacher.

Pets are a blessing! So are good husbands ... thanks Charlie!

The thing about cancer is that you never really know if it's over (at least not for many years after the fact). Every small pain becomes a 'what if it's back?'. The only way I see to get over that fear is to take care of my body and leave the rest in God's hands.

I'm making changes because I want to life the rest of my life on my terms ..... remember all those possibilities when we were younger? We believed we were capable of anything. Most of them are still there, just buried. I want to be strong and healthy like I used to be. I want to be grateful for my health this time!

So ... No more somedays ..... the time is NOW!

Do what you like, like what you do (from Life is good)

You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think. - Christopher Robin

You don't become a loser by falling down, you become one by not getting up. - LIL.ANGEL

Dates to Remember:
11/04/09 - I became a Sparkpeople motivator :)

Read More About THENEWPATRICIA (Updated November 5)

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