ADARKARA   77,144
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In A Perfect World...

Saturday, November 22, 2014

...I would be here:

With a cup of hot tea and a good book. And maybe a sexy half-naked man, but honestly today that's optional. I kinda just want to sleep. And not do the 150 things on my to do list.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ANNIEONLI 11/22/2014 1:25PM

    Bahahahaa!! Half nekkid man....hogging all the comforters?!? Depends on the day ;) LoL I'll take a half glass of wine though! LOL

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My Crazy Wonderful Morning

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

(This blog brought to you in part by Arctic Monkeys' R U Mine? because I was lucky enough to hear it on the radio during my morning debacle.)

It's not even noon yet and my morning has been a little nuts.

Like every Wednesday, I got up at 5, emptied my bladder, made coffee, weighed myself (170.0 ugh) and sat down to read some stuff on my phone. Bingley curled up with me, and was mad when I got up to make myself a cup of coffee, but settled back down when I got back to the couch. Around 6 I got on my workout gear, warmed up to a couple songs on my jogging playlist and hit the bell.

I squatted lower during swings, tried to do more high elbows, worked on my form for toe touches/windmills, squatted reaaaal low for squat press, made the bell touch the ground for sumo deads and finally got my rhythm down for lunge fig 8s, and I did 26 in a minute. Probably could have done more but I lost my balance because I am perpetually unbalanced. emoticon

Then I did 3 sets of 90 second elbow planks, Russian twists and side crunches (I love the stretch in my side during side crunches, feels good man). I hopped in the shower and threw my breakfast in the toaster oven. All good so far. All GREAT so far. It changes from here.

So I dress, pack my lunch, ready the dog, grab the can of coffee I bought for work. I was trying to get out the door early and thus get to work early so I could get a spot behind the building and avoid having to pay for parking for the third time this week. I get in the car just before 9 and make it to work around 9:15ish. All the spots are taken. WTF. So I put on my flashers and put Bingley inside the back room so I can go park. When I get back into the car I realize... I DON'T HAVE MY EFFING LUNCH. OR MY EFFING COFFEE. And while I have the $2 I need to pay for parking, I am otherwise out of cash.

So instead of parking and putting coffee and lunch on my credit card, I drive the EFF home to get my LUNCH, because I know it tastes WAY BETTER than anything I could buy in this stupid town, haha. This was the point where I heard R U Mine? on the radio and I just cranked it and sang along and bopped my head and chose my mood.

So got home, grabbed stuff, got back in the car, drove back to work, parked in the pay lot, hauled butt toward the building, made coffee, and grabbed Bingley to empty him. As I locked the door behind me to go outside I realized in my haste to get in the building (it's COLD out there, you guys) I had forgotten to PAY for the parking, lol. I have no IDEA where my head is this morning. (Okay, that's a lie, I know exactly where it is.) So I paid for parking. I emptied the dog. My fingers froze a little. I made it back into work. By now it's after 10.

Throughout all of this I'm in a fantastic mood. And it gets better, because I sold something on my personal eBay account, which will be money for either a heavier kettlebell or a new corset, depending on how much I can collect. So the person used the Buy It Now option to purchase the item for 69.99, but before paying for it, sends me a message saying they'll pay $50. What? Hell to the no. That's not how it works. So I manage not to flip out on them and explain that since they purchased it for 69.99, that's what they would have to pay, totally expecting the person to give me crap and have to cancel the transaction. But in a weird, out of the ordinary way the person actually PAID for it AND apologized. That threw me for a loop. I work on eBay every day, and that just does NOT happen. But, I'm happy! So I packed it and shipped it.

And despite all this crazy weirdness I'm still in a freaking amazing mood and loving every minute of it. I just have to make sure Saleswoman doesn't ruin it for me. emoticon

Okay, hungry now. Must EAT!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

_VIRYA_ 11/20/2014 12:28PM

    Sounds crazy! I LOVE that song!

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CLUMBOY 11/20/2014 6:48AM

    the best part is that you kept your mind together the whole time. things always work out--the hard part is staying happy while that is going on. have a GREAT day today too!

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LIVEDAILY 11/19/2014 8:23PM

    It is SO wonderful when you have a GREAT day!!

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FOR_THE_DUDES 11/19/2014 5:44PM

    You deserve a high five for your day. I know I said I'd give you a high five. But now I'm offering you a high four. Will you take it?

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NETGYRL 11/19/2014 3:49PM

    Gotta love the power of endorphins! Hope the rest of your day stays interesting in a non-stressful way. ;)

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ARRREAGLES 11/19/2014 3:33PM


Also, love that wherever your head was, it made you in a good mood despite all the trials and tribulations. Good headspaces are super wonderful things.

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CATTUTT 11/19/2014 1:59PM

    Wow, what a morning. Sounds like it got a little crazy for a bit, but I"m glad to hear you're maintaining such a good mood through it all. I'm in a good mood too, and loving it!

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NUTSNUTSGETEM 11/19/2014 1:40PM

    You need a little boring for the next couple of hours so you can catch your breath. I say you go to Pandora and make a Carpenters station for times like this.

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HONEYBEESBLISS 11/19/2014 1:22PM

    Wow that is awesome about the ebay person, I've had to deal with a crazy person on there and that really put me off ebay!!! LOL Glad they weren't a nutter after all! LOL
emoticon on your morning!

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UNSWEETMAMA 11/19/2014 12:47PM

    Roll wit it, baby.

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GSEATON 11/19/2014 12:37PM

    Hey, my kid introduced me to Arctic Monkeys and they DO jam! Your posts always make me happy, thanks, hon!

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Good Food: A Blessing and A Curse

Sunday, November 16, 2014

It's a Fireplace Day today. By that I mean it's cold outside, cold enough to wear gloves, and a little overcast, and all I want to do right now is throw on my flannel PJs and my robe and curl up under a blanket. There's only one problem with this: I don't have a fireplace. Boo. That and my Aunt is visiting from Florida and leaves tomorrow so I want to see her before she leaves, so I can't PJ it, I've got to clothes it. I want to see my aunt but I am not in "venture outside and deal with people" mode.

Last night was a surprise birthday dinner for my Bossman. His girlfriend set it all up. She tried making reservations for 7 PM, but the earliest she could get was 8:30. Hubs and I are usually in bed around 9-9:30 because we get up at 5. Myself and hubs, Josh and his wife Andrea, and Watchmaker and his wife were all there early, waiting to surprise. We promptly informed the server that he would be waiting on a table of smart asses and that he should react accordingly. This went over very well with him, actually. Bossman, as per usual, was late. Then he and his girlfriend grumbled over how to order, because she had requested individual menus but because we were a party of 11, they gave us the family style menus. By the time I got a cocktail (Italian Greyhound: vodka, grapefruit juice and Campari with a giant sprig of rosemary in it) it was after 9 and we hadn't ordered apps. I noshed on 2 pieces of bread because that's all I had and I hadn't eaten anything since 2ish if you don't count the crispy layer that peeled off the Sacher torte I made for dessert.

We got apps: I thoroughly enjoyed the calamari fritti and the salad caprese. I had the spinach salad, which was topped with gorgonzola, pine nuts and bacon. Uh, yum. For my entree I had Linguine with clams in white sauce, which was so good I sopped up the sauce with yet more bread. I lost count of the bread at this point. The conversation was racy and snarky, and Josh and I made bets on how many times Watchmaker's wife would turn the conversation to her children. I guessed 7 and he guessed 8. I think by the end of the night she had reached 14. We learned that Nathan learned to read on Dr. Seuss books, and that Nathan got 5 job offers and Jeremy is going to Texas for Thanksgiving. Every time she would change the subject from what everyone was talking about back to her kids Josh would knee me. We teased each other about being second choice besties and that we're stuck with each other. It was fun.

It was, however, confusing to hear my name uttered so often and then hear a question I didn't understand. That's the way it is when two Andreas are at one table!

So then came the Sacher Torte which they took in the back and decorated up pretty for us, since while everything I bake tastes good it is rarely pretty. Boss's girlfriend tried to cut the cake but I think she was too drunk so it fell to me. Which was fine because then I got to lick chocolate ganache off my fingers! By the time we got home it was almost midnight and I was exhausted and so full I didn't think I was going to be able to sleep. I didn't sleep super well and neither did hubs. He called out this morning from work. Guess we're not used to that much rich food anymore. My stomach feels okay but I have a bit of a headache and am kind of grouchy from lack of sleep. I'm trying to keep my eating on the lighter side today, eating a lot of veggies to feel fuller without consuming so many calories. I don't even want to try to calculate what I ate yesterday, but I know I was over. By like, a lot. Meh, it's over and done with, but I won't be doing that for a while.

I really, really do not want to go back out today, but like I said, my Aunt is leaving tomorrow, so I kinda have to.

So without further ado here is this week's menu:

Homemade veggie soup, grilled ham & cheese

Pork Ragu over soft polenta, green beans

Chicken & Pumpkin soup

Beef roast, mashed potatoes, peas

Sopa de Feijao-Manteiga (Squash, bean and veggie soup. I'm making hubs cook me dinner on his day off)

Southwestern Chicken Bake (chicken breast, pinto beans, corn, salsa verde, onions, cilantro) with rice on the side

Baked Acorn Squash stuffed with quinoa, dried fruit, almonds and middle eastern spices. (I'm really looking forward to this one.)

I can't believe Thanksgiving is next freakin' week! This autumn is just flying by.

Hope you all are having a great weekend, and will try to vlog tomorrow!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LIVEDAILY 11/17/2014 9:51PM

    I totally understand about it being a fireplace kind of day. My apartment before this one, my apartment in New Orleans, had a fireplace. A real, working, log burning fireplace. And, YES, I used it every chance I got!! Once you've lived in New Orleans for awhile, you get acclimated, and 50 degrees feels COLD. lol I miss that fireplace!

Your menu sounds as scrumptious as ever. Tell me, do you make your polenta from scratch? What brand do you use? Any hints??

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NETGYRL 11/17/2014 1:30PM

    What happened to the mediocre pizza? :) Sounds like very calorie was worth consuming. I never fell bad about eating those kind. Ever. Glad you enjoyed it.

Fireplace.... oh yeah! great idea! Time to fire up the fire place app on my iPad! :) 'Tis the season!

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GSEATON 11/17/2014 10:29AM

    LOVE your menus and Watchmaker Wife needs to get a life, lol! Sounds like a nummy NUMMY evening!

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FINCHFEEDER80 11/17/2014 9:36AM

    That acorn squash sounds amazing! I'm glad you had a good time, even if it was too much food and too late. I hope you're feeling better today!

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CLUMBOY 11/17/2014 6:43AM

    hi there--sounds like a great time. I know exactly what you mean about eating a lot of rich food at weird times you're not used to. when that happens to me my body reacts with a mad craving for fruit (which I normally do NOT crave and don't eat enough of). esp. oranges. and you cracked me up with the "unattractive baked good". I have the same affliction. Patrick was here one day scarfing on some apple dapple and he stopped with a mouthful and mused "you know, your baked goods are usually really ugly but they taste SO GOOD." we decided I should open a bakery and call it "chris's ugly food bakery" or something.
I would also love the acorn squash recipe--I have quinoa here but haven't experimented with it enough. have a great day!

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AHTRAP 11/17/2014 12:22AM

    Yeah, I've very rarely had the problem of having another person with the same name in my presence :p

How long did it take from posting this to actually making it out the door?

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CATTUTT 11/16/2014 9:32PM

    Sounds like you had a great night with some great food!

And man your menu has made me hungry all over again. Hope you had a nice time visiting with your aunt!

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SAGE150 11/16/2014 7:58PM

    Do you not eat or have leftovers? We always eat leftovers for about three days for economic reasons and also because when we cook, most recipes just seem to make excess for two people. I can't imagine cooking for two every single day. I'm grateful for my days off from cooking. Just wondering. No judgey, judgey here. ;-)


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I_CAN_AMY 11/16/2014 1:44PM

    Um, Yum. Can I come over for dinner on Tuesday? Pumpkin soup sounds great! Your menu make mine sounds really, really lame. I make big pot of soup on Sunday and I eat it until Thursday! Occasionally, I'll have a salad or sandwich with it if I'm low on soup. I went on a date last night and also, do not want to calculate calories. I'm eating veggies and egg whites today!

Have a great Sunday! Hopefully, you can put your pjs on right after seeing your aunt!



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HONEYBEESBLISS 11/16/2014 1:28PM

    LOL A little OT but that Baked Acorn Squash sounds fan-flipping-tastic!!! Do you have a recipe for it, because I'd like to try it myself! I tried Acorn Squash yesterday and I really liked it too and could see how it would be amazing stuffed!
Glad you had fun, too bad it was so late though, and hope your time with your Aunt is nice though you have to leave the house!

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Of Wisdom, Guidance, and the Season of Giving

Saturday, November 15, 2014

A lot of people I know lately have off-handedly commented to me about how *old* they are. I don't mean they're saying "oh I'm 27" I mean "oh God, I'm so old."

This thought doesn't strike me often. I don't feel old. I've never felt old. (Okay, once, when I was entertaining a pair of merchant services processors for my Bossman while he was helping a customer and one of them told me he was born in 1994. I felt old then.) I've always, *always* felt too young. I've always been a little bit of a scared little girl. Maybe it's because I was sort of overprotected growing up. Maybe it's just my nature: to constantly question my own thoughts, feelings and experiences. Maybe it's my lack of assuredness (I don't think this is an actual word but today I don't care) about where I am in life.

Lately I've gotten a few messages from SparkFolks about how I seem to know what I'm doing around here. This has made me somewhat uncomfortable. Not because I haven't been honest with you guys, because I strive to be honest as much as I can, and there's no reason at ALL to lie about weight loss and food and exercise. It's just that, yeah, I have lost a bunch of weight around here. Yeah, I've been working on my insides, too. Yeah, my life has changed a bit for the better. But I am no means an expert on anything, and would never claim I am. I am extremely honored that you guys like and respect me enough to ask for my advice, and I will gladly answer any questions you may have about my personal experiences with losing so much weight. I hate using this word, but I am blessed to have you guys. Because without YOU, I would not have gotten this far.

I DIDN'T DO IT ALONE. I am not an island.

Over the 3 years I've been working on myself I have come up with a list of things that have helped me.

1. GOOGLE. If I don't know the answer to something, I Google it. Sometimes I just Google stuff because I like to learn. Sometimes I Google things I wish I could unlearn. Don't ask. The point is, asking here will not always give you the correct answer. Remember, you're not asking experts, you're asking other people who have struggled/are struggling. Sometimes you might get a gem, and sometimes you might get bad information. This also applies to doctor's offices, where one of the people who take your weight and blood pressure told me to only weigh myself before bed because all the fluids in the body are off to one side in the morning or something. (Did she not know how crazy she sounded?) Don't believe everything you hear or read. You don't need to know everything, you just need to know where to find the information when you need it. Thanks Professor ____ whose name escapes me.

2. PAY ATTENTION. To your mind, your body, your surroundings. I once read an entry on the Panic Button message board here by a woman who was in her 40s with 3 kids and didn't know women retained water during their menstrual cycles. Even if no one ever told you that, it should be something you observe in your own body. If I didn't pay attention to how my body acted certain times of the month I would have freaked out and given up a long time ago. (And now, that I'm in "maintenance" and working out harder, I have to relearn how my body works so I don't freak out at the scale again.) Speaking of the scale, pay attention to that, but also, don't pay TOO much attention to that. Yes, you may have put on 5 lbs overnight according to said scale. But you have to stop and THINK about it. What factors play into that weight change? Did you actually overeat by 17,500 calories yesterday? Did you have a lot of sodium? Did you have a particularly hard workout? Is it the time of your cycle where you retain water? Pay attention to all the factors. Weight loss is math, but math where the equations never quite equal out in the way you expect. It's Alice In Wonderland math with about a thousand factors and a bunch of Greek letters thrown in. Once you begin to understand that, the scale is less upsetting.

3. DON'T BE A SHEEP. I'm going to be totally blunt in this paragraph, so please forgive me. I think the failure in weight loss for a lot of people is that they hear about a diet, and they just dive into it because someone else already thought of everything and they don't have to think too much about it as long as they follow that plan to the letter. People do that in other aspects of their life, too. Think about it though. Did you pay money to have someone tell you what to eat or how to work out? If so, then the person who wrote that diet plan or workout was in it for the money. Yes, they may have some sound ideas and some very good advice. They may even want to help you. But in the end (and yes, I know I'm cynical), they want your cold hard cash. Plus, a lot of these plans have failure built in. They're strict, they're quick, and yes, they can get you to goal weight. But what do you learn? You learn to follow. You don't learn how to eat, or how to cook, or how to live beyond the diet. So what happens when the diet is over? You gain. You go back on the diet. You buy more supplements, or more workout DVDs, or find a new diet to try. (And I'm sorry but Weight Watchers Points System is a bunch of crap. Yes, some food labels come with points on them these days. But what about all the things that don't? Are you going to carry a book around with you for the rest of your life just so you can know what to buy in the grocery store?) Think for yourself, research for yourself. LEARN. GROW. I will be your guide but I will NOT tell you what to do or how to live.

4. LIVE. Don't put off your life until you lose weight. Don't avoid people, parties, dinners out until you hit goal. Because it isn't realistic, and it makes it harder for you to stick with it. Depriving yourself will only lead to overindulging later. So enjoy your life now. Don't wait for that elusive someday when you're perfect. Perfection IS. NOT. ATTAINABLE. Yes we can strive for it, work towards it. But it is NOT. ATTAINABLE. There will never be a time when you feel perfect. There will never be a time when you are 100% sure of a decision at the time in which you make it. Life is a risky, dangerous, terribly scary place at times. You still need to go out and explore it sometimes, even if it terrifies you. It SERIOUSLY terrifies me at times. Like, seriously, seriously.

5. BE STRONG. I'm really bad about playing up my good parts. I am insecure. My levels of self-assuredness fluctuate massively. But the one thing I know is absolutely true about me is that no matter how bad things get in life, no matter how dark it may get, I will come out on the other side, and I will be okay. Sure, I may delve into a really dark place for a while. But that doesn't last. No state of being is permanent to me. Everything is in a constant state of flux. Maybe everything will not turn out okay, it rarely does. But *I* will be okay. I have discovered so much about myself in my time here: notably that I am stronger, physically and emotionally, than I thought I was before. I just had to push myself. (Okay, I may have had a little help pushing myself in my workouts. I may have been inspired a little.) Remember, you *CAN* handle it. You can.

So, to sum up and sort of circle back around to the beginning where I talked about feeling young, I am not an expert in this game of life or even in weight loss. I'm not an expert in anything. Not remotely. But I constantly strive to improve in all aspects of my life. To learn and grow. To not float. To reflect. I may feel young and inexperienced and insecure, but I hope someday to be to be wise.

Now I have a request for you, an assignment maybe. There are a lot of people on this site who blog. Not everyone is lucky enough to garner the amount of attention my blogs receive. I want to change that, so I'm going to use my soapbox. I put to you the task of finding a blog on here, a recent one, that has no comments on it. I want you to READ it. All of it. Don't skim it. Don't surface-level it. Read it. Read INTO it. And comment on it. Don't just throw a THANKS FOR SHARING there. Give the gift of your time, thought and attention and give a real response. You don't have to tell me you did it. I'm not keeping score. The greatest gift you can give someone is that of your time and your thought. It's the season of giving, doncha know. Give a little.

Rock on, you guys. Rock on.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

_VIRYA_ 11/20/2014 12:30PM

    Great blog. emoticon

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NETGYRL 11/17/2014 1:21PM

    I have never felt old either. I hope I never do. I will say, damn I'm getting old when I realize the 9 yo kid next door is now in college, but I still don't really feel old. :) Perhaps I should consider growing up one of these days...

I think I am pretty dialed in on all your points except #4. I live, and yet I don't. I live in that I don't let my weight stop me from jogging out side or keep me from going out and about with family and friends. I don't live in that I have not been to a high school reunion, ever, because I don't want anyone to see how fat I am. I don't like to go to the beach because I hate how i look in a bathing suit. Those are the things I a working on, and of course, as I lose weight it gets easier but still... Work to do.

Thanks for sharing! emoticon

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FINCHFEEDER80 11/17/2014 10:04AM

    PREACH, sister! Actually, what you said in point number five really hit home with me a lot. The realization that I needed to find my own way, in addition to several other factors, led me to end the business aspect of my relationship with my nutritionist.

Thanks for being you and telling it like it is.

And thanks for sharing! emoticon

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GRACEOMALLEY 11/16/2014 9:34PM

    As always, I so enjoy reading your thoughts. I honestly wish we lived closer, because in spite of the age difference (I'm 64) I suspect we'd have some great times and conversations. You are honest with us and with yourself - a lovely and unfortunately not all that common set of qualities. Thank you for that and I love your suggestion. I try to read at least one blog a week without comments and make a meaningful comment. Can't always do it, but I try.

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SIMONEKP 11/16/2014 10:58AM

    great blog and you're right on point with 4 and 5.

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LIVEDAILY 11/15/2014 5:37PM

    Really good blog Andrea! Especially about learning about your own body! Everybody's body is different and unique. Just because we're all human does not mean that we all retain water the same way or crave certain foods the same way. Guidelines are just that: guides! Use your own judgement. Educate yourself! Dare I say it? Experiment! Try new things! Grow! This isn't just about losing weight or getting healthy. It's about all of that AND improving yourself so that you can be the best YOU there is.

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CATTUTT 11/15/2014 1:49PM

    This is a great blog and you make some great points. Especially about being observant. I'm still trying to learn a lot of things about my body, in particular with my blood sugar.

And at the risk of being a sheep by following your advice, I"ll say it anyway. Thanks for sharing!


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FOR_THE_DUDES 11/15/2014 12:25PM

    THANKS FOR SHARING!!!! (hehe....just kidding.)

Actually this really is a wonderful blog. I actually have come to the conclusion that even the true experts---the people with credentials and advanced degrees in nutrition---are not experts when it comes to anyone of us. Our bodies are incredibly complex, and the scientific understanding of nutrition is shockingly poor. (Are eggs good for us this week? Margarine, right?)

My strong hunch is that we've got this crazy and unique cocktail of hormones, DNA, environmental factors, and psychology that means there can not be a one size fits all protocol for weight loss success. The future of medicine is almost certainly going to be much more highly individualized. Until we get to that point, I think self-experimentation is undoubtedly the best (and most fun) means of getting where we want to be.

I also really, completely agree with living and not letting your weight inhibit your life. I've been obese my entire life. I've lost a lot of weight, but I'll be honest, I highly doubt I will ever be able to maintain a "healthy" BMI for the long-term. I couldn't imagine all of the regrets I would have if I had let my fat inhibit my life experiences. I'm not losing weight to be happy. I'm already happy.

But I see people on here often talking about not living their lives because they are not thin enough. It makes me really sad to read about some young woman not going to a Halloween party because she doesn't feel comfortable wearing a sexy costume. Or someone who doesn't go down a water slide with their kid because they will look like a fool. It's just so much wasted time and unnecessary punishment. Plus, looking like a fool once in a while is really healthy in its own right.

Loved the blog.

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HOPEFULHIPPO 11/15/2014 12:21PM

    I feel young, til I run into the fridge.....or a tree.....or the table attacks me...

then I just feel owies.


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HONEYBEESBLISS 11/15/2014 11:39AM

    emoticon I feel young too, I probably feel 19 most of the time or maybe just in my 20's! I also like to keep growing and YES please Google things people!!! LOL And above all I really love your recommendation to find a blog and really READ what people are writing, sometimes I wonder if people really read things. And a thoughtful comment means a lot, though sometimes I understand just wanting to give a few words of support sometimes. But I really appreciate the SparkFriends who do give thoughtful comments consistently and I try to be one too!

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ICEDEMETER 11/15/2014 9:48AM

    Hon, I hate to tell ya, but you are NOT old --- you're just a baby (albeit a wonderfully wise and articulate baby). Me, now, I'm old (not wise - wisdom does not come automatically with age, no matter what anyone tells ya - cynicism, on the other hand...).

What you've shared here and in all of your other blogs is what I consider to be the most important concept - that you are on the journey of becoming an expert on YOU.

THAT is what we all need to do for ourselves, using the tips and tricks and support that we find from Google and friends and "experts" and our own growing knowledge of our own minds and bodies. Support and friendship are both fabulous things and an important part of life, but the "answer" for each of us will be found inside ourselves and will be true just for us.

Thanks once again for putting yourself "out there", and putting words to thoughts in such a compelling way.


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ARRREAGLES 11/15/2014 8:01AM

    More and more often these days I will admit I feel old. Tat to being said, I am also in the best shape in my life. So I love your sense of perspective here.

And some amazing advice in here too. That is such a great gift to give, thanks. I think a lot of people ask your advice because you are so willing to be you and share. Being that open and honest and loving and giving is special, and I think that's what makes you so special.

I also google the bejesus out of things. Sometimes I find I was wrong about something. It's almost a game sometimes, googling to find things out. No winners or losers though when you are laughing and enjoying.

Finally, I appreciate your blog gift idea immensely. Every day I log onto sp I make sure to read a blog and comment thoughtfully on it. This is, afterall, a community. I want to make it vibrant. I get a lot of thanks for being nice, but find it not worthy of thanks. It's what we all should do. A wonderful reminder.

So thanks for sharing. :)

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Of Energy, Projects, Clothes and Snow (and some other things)

Thursday, November 13, 2014

(This blog brought to you in part by "Happy Little Pill" by Troye Sivan)

I have energy this morning. A surplus.

I woke up before the alarm after a dream reminded me of some of my insecurities. I spent a half hour or so sipping coffee and thinking. I decided I didn't want to feel anxious today (it IS that time of my cycle where anxiety gets to me, but I had a surplus of brooding on Monday night/Tuesday so I told myself NO) so I got up off my butt and did stuff around the apartment. I emptied the dishwasher, then did the sink full of dishes, realizing I had left my leftovers from last night's dinner on the counter when I rushed off to bed. Then the purge bug hit me again, and I went through the bathroom cabinets and the show organizer full of stuff on the back of the bathroom door and got rid of a whole bunch of crap that was out of date and organized it a bit better. In a month it will be back suffering from the entropy that I can never truly escape, because I like organizing but I'm terrible about MAINTAINING organization. Then I went into the guest room/office and cleaned out the cedar chest, which is now empty and waiting for other stuff to go in there.

In my cedar armoire I found two gifts we had been given previously that we've never used. One is a mold to make a candleholder from ice, and the other makes a wine bottle holder from ice. At this point I'm unsure if I want to try to sell them on eBay or keep them and hope I remember them for some housewarming party I might someday potentially be invited to. I just suddenly am having a feeling that I have too much sh*t. A lot of this has very little to do with me, actually. Hubs likes to keep stuff. He's not a hoarder, but he keeps things he might someday potentially need for yet unknown reasons. (Side note: I love the things he gets annoyed with me over, like the fact that I don't spend enough time putting the flatware away in the divider neatly, or that when I shower I don't twist the shower faucet into the off position when I'm done. Because we only ever SHOWER, so why would it be off?!) So every now and then I wander around the place tossing old movie ticket stubs and receipts and appointment cards for doctor's appointments that took place six months ago.

I'm also doing this thing I do where I start a bunch of projects and don't finish them. I finally put away a scarf I started last year, but never finished. I might eventually. I stowed it with another scarf I started in probably 2006 and never finished. I found two wooden boxes I had set my mind to decorating and never finished. And I've decided to started a new project. I was writing a little story last week and describing an outfit, and when I got to the jewelry I was thinking about earring studs with prisms on them, and an assymetrical fine silver chain with a teardrop prism that rests just above the cleavage. So several minutes on Pinterest and a few minutes of browsing at Fire Mountain Gems showed me that what I want could potentially be possible AND affordable. I'm going to recreate these:

I haven't 100% decided on how the necklace will look yet.

So yeah, new project. Today I don't have much to do at work so I'm going to sell some stuff on eBay. Two corsets, some religious collectibles that my stepmom gave me after my dad died, a set of Billy Blanks Tae Bo DVDs with the stretchy tension band thingies, and a vintage scarf from Curacao that my Gran had and some card stock leftover from my wedding invitations. If anyone is interested in any of those things, send me a SparkMail and I'll link you to my eBay store when I get the stuff listed. I'm going to put whatever I make towards my corset for next year, once I decide what I want to be.

I also looked through my closet this morning and was sort of appalled. A lot of what's in there is too big or are tees, which I don't wear much of anymore. I've kind of gotten used to dressing in ladies fitted tees now, and I feel like a slob when I wear baggy tees. It's weird how that switch happened. My skinny jeans have a 1 inch gap at the waist, in spite of me gaining weight. If I don't wear a belt, I'd look like a plumber. I think I've figured out what look I like the most though. I like the outdoorsy, slightly sexier than LL Bean look. Casual and comfortable and looking like I could go for a hike at any second but still kind of youngish. Plaid flannels, skinny jeans or cords, boots, vests, knit scarves, etc. I've been dreaming about an autumn red v-neck cable knit sweater and tawny corduroy leggings and thick knit socks.

I've decided I'm going to try to add a budget in for clothes for me in the new year. Hubs and I are going back to the thrift store on Sunday, and every time we go to Target I hunt the clearance section for more long sleeved tees. I have yet to find a plaid flannel I really like, but that's probably because I'm unwilling to spend $50 on one.

So today's agenda is finding a recipe for a cake for Bossman. The reservations for his birthday dinner are now 8:30 PM. I am usually in bed by 9. Ugh. Oh well, it will be nice to hang out with work people outside of work, and I really like Bossman's girlfriend and I don't get to see her very much. Bossman's sister is also back to work for us for the winter as usual, so that will hopefully mean slightly less of Saleswoman. She's been working almost 40 hours a week so I see her EVERY DAY.

Okay bestie just informed me that "we" are supposed to get snow tonight. But she lives more than an hour north of me, above the snow line. Camden County will probably not get snow. So LIVEDAILY, good luck with that snow, haha.

Today's thrown together lunch (to make up for leaving last night's Hawaiian Ginger Chicken and Collard Stew on the counter all night) is leftover rotisserie chicken, some feta, a baked potato, some sliced cukes and a bell pepper. Yum. I still would have liked the stew, because collards cooked in ginger, garlic and shaoxing rice wine is amazeballs. MMMMMM. Oh well, I'll manage.

Anyhoo, tchau for now, folks! LUVYABUHBYE

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LIVEDAILY 11/14/2014 10:59PM

    Ha! I LAUGH at your snow! Actually, the closest to me that got any kind of snow at all was West Milford. They got about 2 inches, but they are close to the NY border. Stormville NY got about 3 inches. Nothing by me - just cold air. It's 28 now.

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VERSESTHATHURT 11/14/2014 9:29AM

    I also get the need to purge everything! I tend to keep things that might be useful, but have no trouble junking them later if they just been sitting too long. My husband would totally be a hoarder if I would let him. I think it's tied to his anxiety, because when he's doing well it's a lot easier to get him to let go of things he never uses.

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AWATTS7 11/13/2014 6:23PM

    Ditto Netgyrl's comment! emoticon

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HONEYBEESBLISS 11/13/2014 6:22PM

    Your muscle gain is impressive!!! I still say are you sure you aren't an amazon woman! LOL

I tend to do the purge and organize and then it doesn't stay that way too, lately I've just been wanting to get rid of junk as much as possible it feels overwhelming sometimes when it collects up too much but then I also have a bit of the tendency to want to save certain things too so that sometimes wars.

Love the earrings and necklace idea!

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SAGE150 11/13/2014 5:39PM

    Dinner sounds delish! :-) I have stuff I keep meaning to sell on eBay, too, but I just haven't got around to it. I have a feeling it is going to take me awhile to find my style and comfortability with form fitting clothes once I lose weight simply never know...or at least it will take awhile for it to sink in that that is your permanent body.


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NUTSNUTSGETEM 11/13/2014 12:55PM

    Thoughts: Ebay the molds - You never used them. You don't want someone, someday saying, "Why the hell did Andrea give us an ice mold for a candleholder?"
Defending your husband - Unless your shower is insta-hot, I am with your husband. You have to turn it off so that you don't freeze when the water comes out.

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NETGYRL 11/13/2014 12:42PM

    Love your blogs. That is all. :)

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