Thursday, August 21, 2014
Four cups in already!
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
I love music, and I am a HUGE lyrics person. I may not always know what the lyrics MEAN, but I love how some people can write imagery so intense you can *FEEL* it.
For example, my favorite line in any song of all time is from "Read My Mind" by The Killers"
"The stars are blazing like rebel diamonds cut out of the sun"
Just. Love. It.
If I love a song, and I mean LOVE it, I will know all the words. Oftentimes I will come up with my own meanings and avoid looking up the "true" meanings.
Tonight I'm back in the 80s listening to some Duran Duran. My favorite Duran Duran song of ALL TIME is The Chauffeur. It's completely different from any other Duran Duran song I've ever heard, and I just love it. It's lyrics are... well... confusing! Here's the chorus:
"And the sun drips down bedding heavy behind
The front of your dress, all shadowy lined
And the droning engine throbs in time
With your beating heart"
Certainly puts me in a moment in time.
And then there's the chorus of "Cosmic Love" by Florence and the Machine:
"The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out
You left me in the dark
No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight
In the shadow of your heart"
Who hasn't felt that feeling at one point or another?
So tell me YOUR favorite song lyrics in the comments please!!
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
I only learned about my connection to famous LA graphic designer Deborah Sussman on Friday. It turns out her husband and business partner, Paul Prejza, is my great uncle on my mother's side.
Deborah was a pioneer in the field of environmental graphic design, and is perhaps most well known for her work on the architectural landscape of the 1984 Summer Olympics in Los Angeles, California, as shown here:
Another example of her work are these gift bags from the LA County Museum:
Deborah lost her long battle with cancer early this morning. I never got to meet her, and heck, I didn't even know she existed at ALL until Friday, despite her working with Charles and Ray Eames in the late 50s and early 60s. The Eameses were a pair of designers I studied in architecture school, even designing a personal project after one of their designs. It is obvious she was incredibly talented, and that she will be missed by the design community, as well as her family.
(Edited for a horrendously bad run-on sentence.)
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
I am attempting to drink my standard 12-16 cups of "work water" out of this:
Because I took home my 32 oz cup to wash it and forgot to bring it back with me. *Facepalm*
I've got 6 down, 10 to go!
Also, here is hubby's new car!
Monday, August 18, 2014
If I had a word to describe my last few days, it would be pensive.
My mom called me on Friday afternoon with some interesting information. She was bored (we both do crazy things when we're bored) and she decided to google all of her family members (she must have been REALLY bored). When she googled me, she found my adoption.com profile saying I'm looking for my birth dad.
To be fair, I'm not ACTIVELY looking. I've made myself available in case HE wants to find ME.
Well, she decided to google HIM. She gave me his first name (Les) when I'd only previously known his last name. I could have asked anytime, I was just hesitant to drag up 33 year old emotions. She told me he's married and has a daughter. She told me where he lives, where he works, what he does. She has a phone number if I want it. I told her no.
See the thing is... I don't want to put myself into a situation where I can be disappointed. I want him to come to me. And if he never does, well, then that's how it's going to be. My adoptive dad was a wonderful man, and I loved him so much. I don't have daddy issues. I don't NEED a dad. I am, however, an intensely curious human being. I found his daughter on Facebook. I can't see much about her other than she is a PHD student (*feeling dumb*) and the few photos she does have up show we have the same coloring, but I wouldn't say we look alike feature wise. If the math works out, she's about 9 years younger than me.
Unfortunately though, googling my birth dad came up without photo evidence. I just want to see a recent photo! I've only even seen the photo of him when my mom was pregnant with me, and he isn't looking at the camera.
I don't want to make contact. Not because I'm not intensely curious, but because I don't think it's fair to just pop into somebody's life like that if you don't know if they're open to it. I don't know if he told his wife or his daughter about me. Maybe it's his little secret. I don't want to just jump in and say "HI I'M YOUR DAUGHTER" and throw a wrench in his life, ya know?
So I'm just going to make myself available on the internet, in my adoption.com profile.
The good news is my mom finally decided to tell me more about him. She said he was sweet, super likeable, everyone loved him, gentle, handsome. The only "negative" she could say was he wasn't very ambitious. I put negative in quotes because lack of ambition does not indicate laziness or anything like that. Hell, I'm not ambitious. Not at all. That doesn't mean I'm not a hard worker or not willing to work for what I have. Earning what I have gives me fulfillment. I WORKED for it. So I'm definitely not taking that as a negative. I said to her "Does that description sound like anyone you know?" and she said "You married your father!" LOL. It's so true, you could apply that description directly to my husband without changing a word.
It's really funny what you realize comes from genetics. They say men marry someone like their mother and women marry someone like their father, but I always assumed it was because you GREW UP LIKE THAT. But I've never met this man. And yet I married someone apparently JUST LIKE HIM!
So weird. (And... knowing my biological grandfather's personality of sweetness, gentleness and love, I can see how my mom fell for my birth dad.)
So you can see how it's been on my mind the last few days.
On a side note, we women always talk about hormones and what a pain in the ass they are (which if often true). But this week I've been experiencing the good side of female hormones: I have been feeling SERIOUSLY like a woman, if you catch my drift. (Ladies, you know what I'm talking about.) Thus the leg photo on my main page. I'm just *feelin' it* this week. I suppose if I just wait it out a week or two I'll be crabby again and cursing my second X chromosome.
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