Monday, February 09, 2009
Everyone should have one - a to do list of some sort. Here is what's mulling in my head right now.
1 - go to the eye doctor
2 - get new glasses AND contacts - I know it's not "economical" but I hate these glasses! I look crappy in pictures b/c of the glare. 10 years is enough. It's time to start poking myself in the eye.
3 - firm up the SIL's baby shower plans - it's on the 21st and I haven't done a thing except invitations
4 - get back to my exercise plan - striving for consistency here. It starts today.
Last night had the biggest moon I had seen in a long time....it goes along with my mood (as usual). Funny, because if you back track in blogs and updates, the moon is always there, affecting the events of my life, as much as I try to not have it affect it.
Saturday, February 07, 2009
It's been one whole year since beginning my journey!! WOW!! Hard to believe that it's a year. Hard to believe that I hit goal and maintained. Hard to imagine how I let things get that far in the first place.
So with the new year, there are a few things that will be taking place that give me new goals to hit...mainly in the fitness department this time around. Last year was mainly about my food intake and learning that. You'd think I would be a fitness junky now...but I'm not...still. LOL
My sister will probably be getting married this year....we have a Christening coming up...and possibly another wedding in September. So the goal is to look good in some dresses.
The goals are super simple. Exercise more regularly. Period. Maybe get some videos to try out - dance stuff b/c it's fun with the kids.
Friday, February 06, 2009
Today is day 364- tomorrow will be one full year on SparkPeople...my anniversary, so to speak!
It's been a wonderful journey - the support has been great, the challenges fun, the sparkpages inspiring, the friends I have made are considered "keepers" in my book, and a select few have emerged into "buds" that I think I would sorely miss if I were ever to not Spark again.
On a serious note: This week has been a very stressful week, and I still emotionally eat on occasion. It's a full blown out PMS week, most likely a full moon too (you know how I love those), work is painfully slow, and the winter blues have hit me hard. You see, I've received a few bits of new this week that worry me a bit. The news doesn't directly affect me at all, in fact, but I care for these people, even though I have never seen them before, or in one case, have not seen them in 20 years. It's in my nature to care (worry) and "pray it out" in that way, and hopefully my vibes sent into the universe will ease their stressful times. To some this might not make any sense at all - "why are you like that?" I have no idea, it's just how I am. I take things and people and their feelings to heart - literally...and to not be able to fix the problem or help them, stresses me out. Maybe writing this will balance something else out there. Maybe it's the economy stressing me out to...Who the hells knows.
On the flip side!!!!!! Because, for goodness sake, there is a point somewhere in my brain....I have been thinking of all the great things that have happened since Feb 7th last year...and here's a little list for you!
1 - I can run for 5 minutes now! for me, that is HUGE
2 - I have more energy and (usually) have steady moods
3 - my skin looks better on my face (on my stomach...not so much...can we say pizza dough? Goshdarn stretch marks & loose skin)
4 - my psoriasis on my knees and elbows (pretty bad) is almost completely gone!!! YAY!
5 - I really know my body now and how it react to certain foods
6 -I haven't had a bile duct attack all this time - another YAY!
7 - I'm actually looking forward to buying a bathing suit this year...I know, what the hell?!?!
8 - Part deux starts tomorrow...new year, new goals, new challenges...but those are for tomorrow...
So that's all I can think of right now...my kids are on my very very last nerve and are determined to drive me insane as I write this. Heck, that's the least of my worries, I'm going to shut my big mouth now. Counting my blessing for the billionth time....again.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Today I met with a woman I was aquainted with 20 years ago! She dated my friend, and we went to the Junior Prom together, and via Facebook, we started talking and decided to have a playdate! Talk about funny/weird/strange/exciting! The jist of it is this, we got together because of a vibe and because we remember each other as being nice people, even though we only really spent maybe 24 hours total in our entire existance of "knowing" one another...when my friend broke up with her, so did we, so to speak, and never saw her again. I feel like I know her pretty well now, which is strange, but in reality, she barely knows me, but we get along. Must be the memories of the poeple we had in common.
Anyways, with all this getting to know you stuff, the pictures from high school came out. I was looking for a few of my own, but all I found were pictures of me being very heavy. Even my junior prom picture of me is heavy, and if memory serves me well, I weighed then what I weigh now....but I guess the fitness wasn't there, the fat was instead. Stuffed into a prop dress, cleavage everywhere. All I saw was the frustration and sadness in each photo. How I hid and was scared to be photographed, even at 16. The insecurities were written across every photo. I also realized that there aren't many of me either. In high school, I didn't take pictures at all, so none are there. My mom was very ill, so I missed parties and dances to be at home with her. And the photos in my twenties were no better...baggy this, saggy that, big hair to hide behind.
The whole thing today just made me realize how I love to be in the RIGHT NOW. I look better than I did in my teens and twenties, that is for damn sure. I feel the best I've felt in 20 years too. It's amazing how things change if you want them to.
So on Facebook, there is this note that goes around asking you to write 25 random things about yourself. A big one was my weight, but to blab that one is a little weird, I think...but it's a huge part of my life. An obtrusive part of my life....well, maybe not anymore, but it was.
Anyway - random weird blog is over at last. Sad about the past, but happy in the now and excited for the future. The best thing about today was that I made a new old friend.
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