Friday, July 01, 2011
I've been reading a lot of blogs about the battle between body image and what our body's actually look like now after exercising and dieting (EWWW! I hate that word 'diet' but in this case, I will leave it alone.) I've touched on it before...but it really is a subject that I don't think will ever go away.
I think the thing to do is to confront it head on an really look and say "Hey, I look AOK." in the mirror every single day, and take those before pics out to remind oneself of where you were and where you are now.
Here's a recent something that happened to me in this regard to throwing those comfort zone issues right out the window:
When I went to the beach with my youngest last, he literally TOLD me to take off my coverup...I basically had no choice in the matter! He can be quite the persuasive stinker, that one! So...I did.
The next time we went to the beach (it was last Sunday) and we went as a family. We had a great time (without coverups & t-shirts on over our suits) and around noon....DH & I were talking while the older 2 were behind us throwing a ball....when only the oldest came back alone.
"Hey,where is your brother?" I ask.
"He said he was coming back here...he was babbling about Pokemon and I wasn't paying attention to him so he came back here."
Well, a long, stressed out, panic-y drama saga later...with the help of a bunch of mom's, lifeguards, and cops....we found our middle guy wandering a few lifeguard stations down looking for us!!!!
Thank GOD for the photo I took of him a half hour before that I showed these mom's...the teenage daughter got a good look and walked down the beach, and found him within 20 minutes of us starting the search. I sure gave HER a huge hug...after I hugged my son of course and told him I loved him but that I was then going to kill him for worrying us like that!
ANYWAY - my point comes to this. I was in my swimsuit THE ENTIRE TIME!!!! Not ONCE did I think, "I've got to put my coverup on!" I ran - BAYWATCH STYLE - from the boardwalk to the towel - goodness knows how far....in my swimsuit and with flip-flops throwing sand everywhere and beating the lifeguard who was with me...went back up to the police station to fill out a report with the cop....yup, all in my swimsuit.
Talk about a forced way to get over one's hangup!!!
On the way home, I realized that I was totally AOK with my body image at the beach...probably for the very first time in my life. For goodness sake, for a 38 year old mom of 3 who is not a work-out-aholic per se....yup, I am A. O. K.
Sure, there is always room for improvement...but right now...it's all good.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Well, woohoo...um, yay...hey kids, please pick up the family room.....please stop wrestling, someone is going to get hurt....can you pleeeasse stop repeating everything that he is saying?....Did you hear me??...Do I need to come in there??
I think, depending on the day, I am going to need to don a whistle and a black&white ref shirt.
Boredom = whining
Boredom = constant snacking (I'm talking about the adults too here)
Rain = boredom which = all of the above
So with the less hectic schedule comes the evils of summer.
So hubby and I are trying to get an economical (ahem,...cheap) handle on this summer. To keep things busy enough on OUR terms instead of other's terms (aka teams, religious ed, school & scout schedules). We do so much during the year on what other's need us to do...this is what we need to do for ourselves this summer.
THAT is our challenge for this summer....for our sanity.
On our to do list:
- Do some home improvements - paint the outside wood parts mostly.
- start piano lessons for my middle guy...possibly my oldest if he is interested. (I hope they will listen to my teaching or else that is a no go...we shall see)
- speech lessons 2x a week for my youngest (much needed for kindergarten prep - worth the money to keep it going)
- impromptu lacrosse practices on Tuesdays....we don't HAVE to go...it's optional & free
- set up playdates....I STINK at them. Self-proclaimed bad playdate-setter-upper here. I have to work on that and THIS is the summer to do it.
- go to Boston to visit my sister (ROADTRIP!!!)
- go to the wineries out East
I'm setting out my calendar today in between loads of laundry and getting to the planning!
It's time to RECHARGE these batteries!!!!!
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
as rare as sighting a unicorn!!
I don't know what possessed me to get my gear on early and actually go to the beach with my 4 year old. Sure, I live 15 minutes from the beach, but really....I never ever go. Part of the reason was the whole heavy/bathing suit factor issue, another part is that I really don't like sand, another part still is that I don't like to get sunburned (and I am one of those that does not tan..I am red, then pale, then red, then pale - so why bother)...and another part is that I happened to spend a LOT of time at the beach as a kid on the family boat and I just never really was like "Yeah, this is awesome!" - the part I really liked best was sitting in the bow of the boat when it was flying through the waves ( at a whole 20 knots) and pretending I was flying...but I digress.
So today I went out of my comfort zone and went to the beach.....and as soon as we got there...then sun went in and the cool breeze picked up. "Really??? C'mon!! I'm asking for a nice beach day here Mother Nature...this is a rare thing going on...please let the sun come out for an hour."
Me and the peanut had some lunch first, then we played in the sand....and since we are alone, there is no Mommmy read a magazine time....there is Mommy come and play with me time. So it was time to hit the waves and play tag and chase with them, just like I used to do as a kid.
The sun was still hiding..and the breeze was still cool.
And then.... The angels sang and the sun appeared!!!
At this point, I still have my coverup dress on...but my son, well, he is NOT having it.
"Mama, take that off! We are going to get wet now! Take it off!" says he.
"But honey it's still cold out to me, just a few minutes more, I promise." says I.
"No Mama, I don't like it on. Take it off. I want to sit and get a gogurt." says he.
So we go sit down...he eats his gogurt, and I, yes, I take off the Barney-colored purple sundress.
He sees this action and he is GONE! Right back down to the water! The little stinker!!! He KNOWS he cannot be down there by himself!
I wave him back....he waves ME back with this HUGE $hit-eating grin right back at me and takes 2 more steps to the water.
I start laughing....he's got me.
So I went down to the water and we played, and noone noticed me in my suit...because I just blend in now. Well, not in my head, but I blend in more on the outside now. Really, the only thing people could criticize me of was being an active mom, playing and laughing too hard with my son in the waves.
I got us there and he got me out of my comfort zone...and we had fun...and even though it was only 2 hours, it was still a moment that I will not forget for a long time.
Friday, June 17, 2011
Yuppers! I have been SO off track and off the radar here....it is NOT EVEN FUNNY!!! Things are slowing down a bit now that school is ending so, WHEW! I think I can finally breathe a bit easier!
I hate it when things get crazy, but crazy is what it has been for the last 2 months straight!
Anyway, back to the tracker I went today...feeling icky for a bit makes me think of my nutrition, and although it hasn't been horrendous, it certainly hasn't been stellar.
A Sparkbud asked me how I keep things in check a few blogs back...and my hubby is now figuring it out on his own as well now too. Getting back on track is just that...when the weekend/event/party/drama is over....well, it's over. Whatever you ate (& drank) is now finished....there is no beating up, there is no OMG I shouldn't have. You accept it as is...as LIFE, and you get right back on track with water and exercise and eating your "normal" the very next day.
I described this lifestyle change to another person as being a really really looooooong string of yarn.
The yarn, from far away, looks pretty darned good. Staight, clean, true.
Now come in close and really look at that yarn.
Up close, the yarn looks way different: there are knots, pills, crazy loopies that stick out, it's fuzzy and not so pretty....but it's still straight and keeps on going.
This lifestyle change is that yarn....you will have those knots & pills and crazy loopies, but in general, if you keep going according to the nutrition & exercise trackers....things will, in general, stay straight and true and things will keep going your way towards the healthier lifestyle that you want.
Be the yarn ....just don't tie yourself up in knots, that would be bad
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Yesterday was a rough day for me...not disasterous, but rough as in the "hectic" sense of the word rough.
On Monday I noticed my right front tire for some reason....it looked a little flat, so I checked out the treads...pretty worn down & the sidewall/tread was starting to split a bit. I should have taken the car in to get tires right then and there...but I didn't...too busy (a mom's life excuse).
So yesterday, I had to drive out east on Long Island to attend my 1st grader field trip to a aquarium...to the split in the forks if one wanted to look on a map...I'm in central LI, so this drive is about a half hour doing 70 mph. I was running late, I had to get gas, yadda yadda yadda. Anyway, I made it out there on time! Yay.
We all had a great time, and at 1pm, it was time to get the kids on the bus and the moms to go home in their cars. Why I didn't car pool was beyond me! Everyone was from the same town! Well, I knew why, it was because I had to jet home to pick up my other son from the sitter's/my friend's house.
Well, I don't know what possessed me after I started up the car and pulled out....but I hopped out to check the tire. It looked worse...it was starting to shred. All I saw was a ticking time bomb on my car....and I was alone....far away from my house! So I figured to start heading toward the main business/retail strip in the area where there were car dealers...good thing I knew the area. On the way, I was trying to call my sitter, but I instinctly dialed my mechanic and I was a bit shocked when I heard their voice on the phone - so....I asked for advice! They said to hit a tire place near where I was and have them switch it to the spare tire & then bring my car right to them. Done....I got this...I can do this.
I never found the 2 places they told me to find....Instead, I saw a Toyota dealer and since my car is a Toyota....in I went! I drove right around to the back garage, I got out and walked in...and I pleaded Damsel-in-Distress!! to a mechanic, who took a look, confirmed my fears & told me to run to the front for a work-order so he could swap it out.
Prayer was answered!
I did as I was told....within 30 minutes, the tire was swapped out and they only charged me $10!!! Thank you Riverhead Toyota!!! Thank you kind mechanics!!!!
So now I have to drive....max 62 mph on the highway to get home, so I called my friend before I left and she said that my son's leg still looked a bit puffy and red and hot to the touch......this is Part 2 of my hectic day........
My 4 y.o. son was run over by a shopping cart (thanks hubby!) at the wholesale store on Tues...he said his leg hurt, but he was running on the thing right after so we kinda shook it off and a bit of a sprain. He even went to the beach on Wed with no problems or complaints. By Thurs we noticed it swelling up and getting red and hot to the touch....on Fri (yesterday's rough day) my friend and her Fireman hubby gave me their opinions and one said infected bug bite and the other said sprain & get an xray. Needless to say I called the doctor once I got to their house....and my cell phone battery died. I redialed from their phone and the office said to come right over! Done!
And off I went...in my spare tired mini-van with a swollen ankled kid to the doc in the next town over...and at this point, I need a snack, and water, and a nap, and a box of wine, and a backrub, and a vent.....because this day did not want to seem to end.
So I started praying out loud.
(Here's a clue on me & religion....
- I respect ALL religions
- I don't TALK about religion openly because it is a private matter between one and that organization
- I expect people to respect mine in the same way I respect theirs
- it's too touchy a subject across the board to address 99% of the time - same goes for politics
- I was raised RC and am doing the same for my kids...tradition is strong with me
- I don't necessarily agree with everything in the RC church
- I DO believe strongly in right and wrong and a higher power....and I believe this is the same vein that is in 99% of all religions.
OK - enough said....don't come and attack me on anything....I will delete it as fast as you wrote it. Thanks)
OK - That being said, I started praying out loud as I got caught behind my 10th SLOW person en route to my pediatrician's office...it was a sign from above to slow down.
"God....I really need a break here. I'm a good person, I pay things forward constantly, I don't ask for much, but I really need a break here. I openly know that the whole tire thing was my fault and that I figured it out just in time. Thanks for those mechanics by the way. But now, I really need for this doctor to tell me that it is a bug bite and all I need is a perscription for antibiotics and cream....because a trip to the radiology department really is going to throw me over the edge. I still have to get back home and pack for camping...and it looks like I am going to be late getting out there, so just have a nice weather weekend for hubby because he really needs a nice break with the guys this weekend.....(as you can see- I ramble pray - but you get the drift)
Anyway...that was the gist of it for about 5 minutes which let me calm down enough to drive through town behind the ancient driver in front of me.
Long story short - another prayer was answered...the leg thing was a bug bite and I got the antibiotics and cream answer I wanted....or rather, needed.
I got home....completely exhausted and frazzled...and I got home before hubby, who upon greeting him, saw my face when I was telling him to go ahead with the camper & that I was not ready & that I just needed some time to pack and rest & then I would drive out to meet him for dinner and the one night out....well, he stopped me and said "You don't have to go. I will be fine by myself....you had a hard day & need to veg out. Stay home with the boys and go in the pool. I feel bad about leaving you alone with them for 3 days."
Another prayer answered.
So this morning's hair and makeup musing was this. I was in a bad mood from yesterday's nonsense still...and I have to get out of this funk because my girlfriend and her son are coming over this afternoon....this is a long time coming, and this has had it's gliches too, but THAT is another story entirely! But I digress, I have things to do to make this a nice afternoon for us all!
My main gripe yesterday with God/the universe was that I don't ever get what I "WANT" necessarily, but when I look back.......I always get what I "NEED".
Each instance of yesterday's craziness was handled by me...and a universe that happened to smile upon me. Things could have been waaaaaaay worse. I know that...and I am blessed to have guardian angels watching over me....and my family.
Sometimes, when we look at things from a different perspective or at the larger picture, it is easier to see WHY we have our individual hardships throughout our lives. Some hardships are worse than others....others have harder crosses to bear...but I believe that everything happens for a reason.
Over the years (and it may take years to figure out the WHY of the situation), I have seen that the strongest always survive and come out on top...because of sheer self will-power and belief in a higher power or something bigger than ourselves.
The other thing I know is that all of it starts from within. Figuring out what you need....will sometimes get what you want....but really, what you NEED is that baseline to move forward.
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