ANNIEONLI   50,691
50,000-59,999 SparkPoints
ANNIEONLI's Recent Blog Entries


Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Confession time: I have a tendency to start things and never finish them.

Well, except for this weightloss/maintenance thing. I finally found something I am good at after all these years! LoL

But in general, I am not very good at starting what I finish. I have GREAT intentions, I do research, I go go go until I burn out....and then....I stop dead in my tracks.

This is in regard to my schooling - I started 2 online courses in March 2010 in Microbiology and Organic Chem and was so burnt by June, I took 2 months off, that went into 6 months....that is now over a year and a half over due in it's completion.

Do I even give myself credit for finishing and getting an A in another course last Sept on Anatomy & Physiology?, not right now...I am too upset with myself for delaying these other 2 courses.

Today I ripped off the bandaid and logged into My Blackboard that holds my courses. On one was an email from August saying that time was running out. On this course, all I have to do is cram and take the final for pete's sake!!!!!! As you can imagine, I sent off a fast email right back begging for more time....I hope I get a positive response back. In the meantime, I guess I will dust off the textbook and get to reading & relearning right? eeesh. right.

I am SO mad at myself for putting this off. It seems that I can only focus on one big thing at a time....and when the other course with it's lovely scheduled tests came along, that was a beautiful thing for me to do (I like being told what to do sometimes, it requires less effort to think I guess).....and then I took another break after that ended and scouts came along and I was once again distracted.

I have only myself to blame if I just threw away a few thousand dollars and hundreds of study hours all due to my scatterbrain.

Another confession: I am scared to take the final exams. Imagine yourself teaching yourself organic chemistry??? and microbiology??? Scary stuff even within a classroom setting at the age of 18 or 20 or 24! and at 37/38 years of age to I nuts? I'm scared that I have lost it. The A from the other class mean bupkiss when faced with these 2 subjects.

See how my excuses come out of the woodwork??? I'm great at justifying my weaknesses aren't I.

I need to finish what I started this time around. 2 years ago, I have never wanted anything so much as a career in nutrition! The passion is still there, but my fire has dimmed. I need a career that will take me into my 60s for pete's sake! I need to help people because darn it, I am really good at it. You know the commercial from way back when, when a job interviewer asks the applicant's strong points and every answer was "I'm a people person." over and over again....well, that is me. I'm a people person, I need to be around people. But I need to be proficient in another profession....and that means to go back to school....and finish.

Well, the first step towards finishing these 2 courses has been made.
Now to calm my nerves, gather my scatterbrain, and make a daily study plan so that I can balance everything and not burn out. It can be done....others I know have done it, why not me??

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OAKBORN 10/25/2011 4:03PM

    Gather yourself. You can do this. Just the final hurdle and it will be over and you will be one step closer to having RD behind your name!

Sorry it's taken me awhile to catch up. Army life kinda is its own different world, hard to explain...

Report Inappropriate Comment
AMJSATURN 10/17/2011 8:07PM

    Rebeccatkd, said it !!

emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUZYWM 10/12/2011 1:01AM

    Honey - balancing kids and home and work and school . . . is just hard. Really hard. I was so glad to be back in school this year, and two months in I'm so over it! I'm taking requirements, and am completely lagging on my reading. I've postponed a midterm that I'm going to have to buckle down and take. If I didn't have to go by my instructors' schedules I don't know if I'd ever finish.

But I need to finish. And as my daughter says, I just have to. Have to do my homework, have to pass my classes.

But I do long to do other things. Walk on the beach, bake, cross stitch, read, write. Anything but homework. Sheesh.

You're smart, and creative, and determined. Look at your weight loss and maintenance! You can do this. You CAN do this! Go for it!

emoticon emoticon
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
REBECCATKD 10/11/2011 10:36PM

    Whew! Take a breath. Prioritize. Create a timeline. You can do this.

Report Inappropriate Comment

walking with Leslie? not so much

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

So this week's update is a weird one....another camping weekend was upon us - and a BEAUTIFUL one at that!!! OMG what a great weekend!

So as some of you may know - camping = movement....LOTS of movement for me this time around, for I was with 4 little boys on the beach a lot of the time and walking them constantly to the bathroom from our camper to the loo at all hours of the day...up a flight of stairs no less!

We went looking for shells and I think I stood in many a yoga pose, contracting my middle, for at least a full hour during the length of the weekend....and then walking on the sand, making sand castles, etc...etc....and then bike riding....well, you can only imagine the soreness I felt the day we got home!!! Oh, my inner thighs!!! Oh, my shoulders! I forgot about those muscles!

The flies were horrendous by Sunday (probably due to the higher temps), so after dinner, we decided to quickly pack things up and head home...and we rolled out just as the sun was setting. This decision was a blessing...yesterday was a true day of rest (aside from doing 10 loads of laundry) and I actually read a real book! Nothing like a good read to calm one's brain. I missed reading for pleasure.

Anyway - my camping pants were ridiculous - old 6's that kept needing to be pulled up...and I finally have decided to retire my most favorite pair. They will stay in the camping bag one more week, but after that, they are hitting 'the pile'. This means that I need to go shopping for new favorite jeans. Eesh, not my favorite thing to do, but a necessary thing because I live in my jeans!

But I digress.....

Back to Leslie - I have not turned the tube on to visit her this past week, but my activity level was ok...once again. I do miss her, so I think a visit is in order. Right now, as I am typing this, I am wearing my workout gear and I KNOW I should get moving, but I'm just not in the mood. So that being said, on the headphones will go and I will take a quick walk around the excuse not to....maybe I need to get out of my house and out of my own way! LoL

As for my dress....I will try it on camping bloat it still in the process of going down - ah, knowing one's body cycles is truly a blessing....after a while, it's clockwork. For example: It takes 2 to 3 days for camping bloat to go down.

OK - time to pull of this bandaid and get moving!!!!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OAKBORN 10/25/2011 4:01PM

    The good thing about Leslie is that she is always there, waiting for you and never judging you! Just get back, you will be fine... as you always are!

Hang in there girly whirly!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DWEXCEL 10/12/2011 7:17AM

    Good Morning Girlfriend!

I love it because you are so real! I can only imagine the exercise you got keeping track of and keeping up with your boys!

You can stop it with the ....gotta pull up my six 6's...LOL (just kidding...)No, really, good for you. That is awesome!

It's been soooooo nice outside....Save Leslie for the winter days that you don't want to go outside :)

Luv ya!

Report Inappropriate Comment
REBECCATKD 10/11/2011 10:35PM

    I just love reading your blogs! I smile every time.
Thanks for reminding me how much movement one can find in the simplest pleasures -- I may have to hit a downward dog before I curl up for the evening.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MRE1956 10/11/2011 11:24AM

    I just GOTTA get that VCR/DVD player working so I can get back to my tapes of LS - for now I've had to use ExerciseTV On Demand to get my "fix" (when it works - sometimes it doesn't).....

Report Inappropriate Comment

Week 4 - walking recap

Tuesday, October 04, 2011

I almost forgot to do this today!!!!

130.9 on scale - feeling uber-thin the last 2 de-bloating is a good thing!!!LoL

Just tried on dress ( a true vision - with pulled down jeans and sneakers on underneath - what a look!) - no contorting once again to zipper it, went up slightly better than last time (lots of pleating makes for a tough zip - I don't care who you are! LoL)

As for walking with Leslie, not so much this week because we went camping on Wednesday (tried to at least - the rain was terrible that night). Previous blogs also shows a cathartic day of backboniness and a reduced level of stress. Glad to say that THAT level of stress is still low (nice huh?) and even though there are a ton of scouty things involving meetings of the future of certain people..I am happy to say I am maintaining my backbone and stress level nicely. I have ideas for the pack....whether or not they are implemented is up to a larger group...we shall see.

Anyway, back to not realy Leslie stuff going on - but camping yields constant moving and walking and bike riding! SO YAY!!!! As a family, we walked a mile & a half on a hike and we also BIKED over 2 and a half miles! THAT is a victory all OVER the place according to me! The kids were constantly on their bikes riding and since we were far from the bathrooms, there were numerous times to take walks back & forth when the bikes were not the mode of transportation to get there quickly.

Not only was I moving family was too!!!!!!! Sweet huh?

As for help me.
Not a great eating weekend.
- Vegetables? What are they???
- Meat? Oh I got to eat enough of that to last a long while! Oh the gassiness that came about!!!! between my hubby & I...eeesh. emoticon emoticon the tears right there....use your imagination! Goes to show you what an overabundance of something will to do a person!
- Got Goodies? donuts, and bagels, and wine - oh my!!!! chips, and pie, and more - oh my!!

Yeah - it was one of those weekends.....hey - they happen.

Honestly, I can look back over YEARS now and see the same thing happen each year. Cyclical eating events show that they are just a drop in the bucket...the key to losing and keeping it off is getting right back on track when you get back to your normal reality...whatever that is! LOL

So I am back on track...water, exercise, freggies (oh how I missed them!) least for a few days until our next camping trip this weekend! LoL This weekend is tradition at this point - we have been going there for 4 years straight - on the beach, apple picking, pie baking on a camp oven, listening to the football game on the radio, riding bikes, walks....all good things that we are looking forward to as a family.

So Leslie - you might be visited only once or twice this week....sorry about that. But I am moving it in other ways! Have no fear of that!!! and I GOT OVER THE HUMP!!! I can honestly say that my activity is AOK to say that I have gotten over the 4 week hump!!! Yaaaay!!!

Now...time to get this day started!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AMJSATURN 10/17/2011 8:00PM

    I love the comment about the gasiness.. I think everyone with a partner understands that one.

Nice that the weight is coming off. Look out classmates here comes Annie.

Report Inappropriate Comment
OAKBORN 10/6/2011 6:23PM

    Hey lady!! So glad to see you making it work no matter what is going on! But of course you are!!

Hope life is rolling along well for you!

It's all about playing ball on running water!


Report Inappropriate Comment

So this is what a backbone feels like!

Thursday, September 29, 2011

I have about 2 minutes to type this...I have to go back to work...but I just got off of the phone and the last thing I said was "Imagine that, I have a backbone!" and then I started to get teary-eyed.

Even now I am a bit while writing this.

I have finally made a decision on where I stand with scouts...and I even verbalized it to the head of the pack...I WILL NOT take over as the leader of this organization. Period.

The last few weeks have been horrible when it comes to stress about this organization. The stupid misconstrued emails. the drama over organizing things and keeping people happy, the crazy blow-ups that the cubmaster has because she is who she is and she is a stressed hot mess herself. I understand where people come from - and I also understand that sometimes...things are just not worth it.

That being said, I drew my line in the freshly poured concrete and that is where it is staying.
- if the organization folds- even as early as Decemeber, then so be it.
- a volunteer organization is just that...and should NOT make people stressed out.
- if the organization folds, then guess what? people will get over it. Oh yes, they will. A couple of "Awww, how sads" and "Awww, too bads" will be muttered, but hmmm, I think that is about it.
-if someone happens to step up, then great, I might stick around to support them under MY terms.

I spoke up today. I am standing firm in my decision, because this is MY life. I have other things that take precedence over this...and you know what? they deserve more respect than what I have been giving them, as of late.

My soul rejoiced yesterday when I made this decision. I am so happy that it is made.

In the meantime, I will continue to be supportive, but also with the focus that OTHERS should step up and NOT JUST ME. If someone wants to do something for this organization, then guess what - well, just do it, because this woman is not crossing that line that she just drew....with a big giant smiley face right next to it! emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AMJSATURN 10/17/2011 7:48PM

    You go. Backbone you do have.

Love that you keep it real.

Report Inappropriate Comment
REBECCATKD 10/2/2011 10:03PM

    Good for you! You know, we had a slew of people leave our PTA last year, and everyone said, "Oh, they won't have any support now." Instead, an entirely new group of people (including me as a new kindergarten parent!) stepped up, and the organization is thriving.

If you're not enjoying it, then you need to step back. Kudos to you for making the right decision.

Report Inappropriate Comment
DWEXCEL 10/2/2011 7:35AM

    Good for you, my friend! I am so proud of you. You are soooooo right. You don't need that kind of stress in your life. It takes a lot of "backbone" to say NO, and I'm sure you feel so much better just having done that.

It's too bad that volunteer groups cause that kind of stress.....that's a terrible way to say Thank you to the volunteers; and heaven knows it's so hard to find volunteers, too.

You've got it together Girl! You don't need that kind of crap!

Love ya!
Donna emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
OAKSHAVEN 9/29/2011 11:32PM

    Been there, and you know what? If the organization is worth having, someone will make it happen. Good for you for standing up and stating what YOU need. It is the only way to survive and stay sane. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TYME2BME 9/29/2011 6:27PM

    emoticon Good for you. Do what is best for you. I am so happy for you.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUZYWM 9/29/2011 4:32PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Yay!! Great job! What a terrific example for your kids! I'm proud of you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TASOGAREBAN 9/29/2011 2:38PM

    Good. It's always mentioned in those self-help articles and How to Deal With Stress articles that you should learn the word No. Not only do I know the word, I wield it every dang day. That and I Don't Care but that one's a bit more heartless, LOL! However, that one also has helped me manage the burdens I normally carried. It doesn't all fall on you. Let things go if they're too much and leave room for things you actually ENJOY.

Report Inappropriate Comment
OAKBORN 9/29/2011 1:56PM

    You Go Girl!! emoticon

Empowerment make you strong in the backbone and gives you greater intestinal fortitude as well! You are amazing and you are doing the right thing for you and your family!

Keep on keepin' on! If people want it bad enough, they will step up. Period. End of Story.

Very proud of you!

Report Inappropriate Comment

    Awesome, way to stand up for yourself!
I have about less than a minute to post a comment, I'm in the same boat as you trying to work and spark. I crept on here at lunch and voom, all time gone just like that. Anyway life itself is stressfull enough to add a big stinky pile of more stress on top of it. Stand your ground and you'll feel so much better because you did what you thought was right.
Plus there will always be the one person who is never happy no matter how you bend or twist just to try to please them. :))
Good Job girlie, wayyy proud of you!

Report Inappropriate Comment

Week 3 walking recap

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Ahhh....I have been blogging a bit haven't I.

Anyway, this isn't about stress (which has decreased) or venting about a particular group (that I am setting up distinct boundaries with).....this is about me & Leslie and walking....and a silly dress that I try on every week!

So the weight today was 131.2 - not bad.

The dress I tried on after I exercised for an hour - a little bit of circulation puff going on for sure, but over all, as soon as I adjust the 'girls' in their pushup bra that I wore with the dress in the first place....the thing zipped up once again, maybe even easier than last week....less contorting for some reason.

Trying to figure out if there was any difference from last week. Hmmmm....maybe the back spilllage (which we all have) was lessened a bit? The arm pit area was definitely a bit better. so there ya go.

It was a rough week for exercising and walking - I will not lie. There was one day that I was just NOT in the mood to do ANYTHING. But on a good note, I still got 3 days in...which is very consistent for me - even when I am not trying to be consistent. Does that make sense?

I am happy about this week because I am now officially on the precipace of "blowing my usual streak of 3 weeks and then life getting in the way" - as per my lovely cyclical exerise past. So, as you can see, for me, THIS upcoming week is a big week to get though.

One thing Leslie has taught me is that it is just important to keep moving...and since I have taken up walking outside (yeah baby....I even did it again today! The confidence of being alone on the road is building!) I am really looking forward to going camping and boogying around the campsite with my headphones on for a half an hour a day at least! I did Leslie today as well....a new video that included toning - how exciting!!!!! LoL

So that is about it......this week is about keeping up the consistency. I would like to see my walks become a habit that I "need" instead of "want". Again, does that make sense? LoL

OK - I am off and running....lots to do today!

Be well everyone!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DWEXCEL 9/29/2011 6:26AM

    Good job my dear! Good Job! Fall really is a beautiful time to walk outside.

Enjoy the camping trip!

Luv ya,Donna emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
OAKBORN 9/27/2011 1:41PM

    I so get what you are saying! Keep up the good work!!

Here's a special cheer for you: emoticon


Report Inappropriate Comment

First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 Last Page