ANNIEONLI   47,663
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ANNIEONLI's Recent Blog Entries

Clarity in saying "no"

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

I was just sitting here thinking... well, actually on my drive around town today to get stuff done within an hour's timespan for personal reasons... and as I popped by the office to bang out some work real fast, it occurred to me that there can really be some wonderful clarity when you say "NO - that doesn't work for me" when it actually means something....and then to actually embrace it as such.

This can be in many scenarios when you think about it... at work, at school, with family, with organizations... especially if you constantly say "yes" - "yeah sure, no problem, I will figure it out" - but the detriment comes unto yourself when you are loading yourself with extra baggage that doesn't really belong there because you "are the fixer" or "it's just easier if I do it myself".

I am the classic "Yeah, no problem, I got it" person. I have great pride in the fact that I can fix pretty much everything you throw at me. I will FIND the answer if I don't have it. I will FIX you.

And I will also beat myself up if things don't go the way things are planned... especially when the group dynamic comes into play (more heads thinking sometimes throws logic out the window - in my humble opinion).

And I will also feel bad about not being able to help as much as I can.

Hold on a second here.... about the above two scenarios I just wrote about... I am much better than I was 5 years ago... I am going to give myself credit where credit it due on that point. If you don't want to listen to reason and logic, and do what you want, go ahead - it's on you.

AHA! See? Progress!!! emoticon

Anyway, back to saying "no" - well, sometimes, it takes the unwanted and unneccassary burden off your shoulders . . sometimes it frees up time that you didn't know you had . . sometimes it empowers oneself to actually move forward instead of holding oneself back . . sometimes it will disappoint another for a minute, but bring joy to you for an afternoon! . . sometimes it saves one from oneself (and we can throw in a foodie staying-in-range reference here if you like).

Why is this thought process coming out of my brain now? Well.... my very active son is home sick for another day - and it is the busiest day of the week, that would end at 7pm on a normal day....we have been going on and on for weeks, and I am a bit tired. Well, now, he cannot go to school or anything after school because he is sick.. the answer of "no" was given to the religion teacher, the orchestra teacher, the elementary school teachers that he could not go in to school...and on my end, it was a a bit freeing to say to my friends: You guys have to figure out carpooling this week..because I can't do it.

Normally, I have no problem with pitching in...trust me, I do plenty, probably more than ... but this little hiatus was unexpected... and freeing in many ways.

Saying "no" sometimes for the right reasons is what I am really talking about I guess... Saying "No" too many times in other areas is just as bad as saying "yes"... it's the balance of both, the yin and the yang, the homeostatis of peace and understanding that really needs to come about to be.. I don't know what .. a complete being.

OK - getting deep here. But you get my drift... or at least I hope you do.

So now to saying "yes" to me again...to tracking, to drinking that water (I cannot believe I have slacked on that part!) . . to things that make me... SMILE! emoticon A walk, playing piano, reading.. soulful things. emoticon

You never know how thing are until an "Aha" moment comes along....and what I am learning, is that there are many more that I ever thought!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DWEXCEL 2/3/2013 7:55AM

    Hello My Dear Friend!

Having been your Spark Friend for sooooo many years, I know exactly what you are talking about when you describe the "old you". You have certainly come a long way, and I am so proud of you and so happy for you.

And I feel your peace.

Love ya!
Donna emoticon

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ANNIEONLI 1/30/2013 1:01PM

    It's a catch-22 Amanda!
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-AMANDA79- 1/30/2013 11:07AM

    I have trouble asking for help at work. I need help and they are there to help. What's the big deal? My mother always said, "Don't ask other people to do something for you that you can do for yourself." It stuck. LOL. I think all the people in your life that keep asking you for stuff need to learn that one!

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DALID414 1/29/2013 3:22PM

    How can you stop drinking water? I tell the boyfriend: when the apocalypse comes I'm gonna shrivel up and die (cuz I drink water ALL day).

Have a emoticon for your thoughts

Comment edited on: 1/29/2013 3:23:27 PM

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OAKBORN 1/29/2013 11:39AM

    I grok this deeply and am getting my own NO point...

And it is okay to take care of yourself.

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2JUSTME 1/29/2013 10:46AM

    I have learned over the years that there definitely is nothing wrong with saying NO! It can have a calming affect on your daily life! emoticon

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Two weeks of crazy...

Monday, January 28, 2013

and now is this the calm before the real storm???

Ugh, you guys have no idea how the full moon hit me last week! I'd say it was one of those rare collisions of choas coming together all at once that hit me in the work - family - extracurricular - school world...and I could do NOTHING but ride the wave until it passed.

emoticon was my face when I ended it and then decided to hide for the weekend!! LOL

Hey, sometimes, S-it happens like that! I don't like it to, but there it is...what are ya gonna do about it? Whine? Naaaaah....what good is that gonna do when you have absolutely no control over a situation?!? But I whine anyway emoticon I try not to, but hey, I am human....it happens! emoticon

So anyway...things here on Spark get uber quiet when things get hairy..I wish there were more hours in the day sometimes, to get to everyone in my sites when I come across them, but let's face it, somethings gotta give...and it's that. I'm sitting in a quiet house right now (I have a sick kid home today) and all I want to do really is take a nap to recharge...but instead, I am taking the few moments to give this quick update so you know that I am alive!

And let's face it, sometimes being absent from something that you KNOW works is NOT a good thing...so here I am...checking in, everyday...even if it's just a wee bit at a time. I think if I stopped sparking it would be way worse than stopping my cyclical exercising, which, by the way, should be kicking in aaaany day now...I feel it.

Weird huh? How I go through these cycles? I have gotten used to them now... things get crazy, I stop exercising - even though my brain is telling me to keep going because exercise helps stress - but do I listen? have I learned? nope. Maybe one day! I'm thinking when unicorns come and eat out of my hand on a warm winter's day. That would be the time for SURE! emoticon But I digress...tis how I am made I guess! Better than not exercising at all like BEFORE... ugh...that was a deeeezaaaaster!

Oh good god this IS a disjointed ramble blog...totally not my style.. but now you get how my brain is right now!

There is no pithy lesson here today, there is no rah rah rah sis boom bah either...just little ol' me telling you that I'm AOK and not gone...hey...maybe that is my pithy bloggidy message for today: Don't go away! Stay active on Spark! It's good for you!!!

There! You see?!?! I did it! Whew...thought I was losing my touch there for a sec!
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Ok - I just heard the kiddo cough his head off and bark like a seal at the same exact time ...time for Nurse Nightinggale to attend the patient!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUGARSMOM2 1/31/2013 12:28PM

  keep on ..

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PBLITZ 1/29/2013 10:23AM

    Oh no! Sick child! emoticon
Hope he feels better soon! I'm sure you're doing an amazing job at playing Mommy the Nurse!
Glad you decided to write a blog! Not only that, but you showed by example how important it is to stay connected!
And from the looks of your spark history, you don't have to worry about getting back into the routine of exercising. It is a part of you now, you'll definitely get back into it. Hope you're not stressing over it!
TRY to get that nap in Annie! Sleep is part of being healthy!!! emoticon
Enjoy the calm and make the most of it! Treat yourself to a nice long bubble bath and maybe a mani/pedi? You deserve it, Superwoman!
xoxoxo

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NUOVAELLE 1/29/2013 2:56AM

    I swear I just saw a unicorn approaching your house! And it's a nice, warm, winter's day here, too!
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I hear you this morning! Home with two sick kids, trying to put my thoughts in order and struggling to stay connected with SP. Because we know it works, we know we need it, we know we actually want to be here. And blogs like this one, which are human and written from the heart can only reassure us that it's worth every minute of our time.
I hope your child is feeling better today.
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DALID414 1/28/2013 9:43PM

    Great lesson teach!

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KANOE10 1/28/2013 5:58PM

    We all have crazy periods like that when everything gets too difficult. You can't keep up with everyone and everything! You just took a minor detour on your healthy journey. I find the same dilemas also with time. If I am pressed for time, I might not Spark..but will try to keep up the exercise. I also know that a sign of me being stressed out, is that I do not have the energy for Spark!

I am hoping your week calms down and that your son is better.

You are right..Keep on Sparking.

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MCFITZ2 1/28/2013 3:13PM

    emoticon You can do this.

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FLGIRL1234 1/28/2013 1:54PM

    Glad you're still hanging on. Like you said, sometimes you just have to ride out the wave and then begin again.

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OAKBORN 1/28/2013 1:14PM

    Hey Sister! emoticon

I hear you! Sometimes just getting some words on the ol' blog is the lifeline that keeps you hanging on, whether you have anything fancy or important to say! emoticon

Good to know you are out there... emoticon

As folks older than me used to say, "Keep on Truckin'!" emoticon

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Older women

Sunday, January 13, 2013

I have a serious crush on some older women...

emoticon but I do!

I have always looked to the future saying "who inspires me of how I want to look like in the future..." and totally on a superficial level too...

So here are my top two: Reba McEntire and Helen Mirren.

I see them on tv and I just think: boy, these ladies are rockin' it! I wanna be that way when I am older. Reba is really pretty fit for her age (look at her arms - they are nice) and Helen, well, she is just so poised and just "wow." I look forward to seeing how they are dressed at award shows more than the tabloid A-listers!

I don't think I have EVER said anything of "What I wanna look like" on Spark before! LOL I don't post pics of hardbodies as "inspiration"...(good god, if you only know what damage has been wrought on my abdomen from being heavy.. I think I'd be depressed pretty fast if I was putting those hard bodies on a pedestal! I'm just glad to be me!! ... But that is me, and it works for others..so more power to ya!)

And over the last few months....there are some pretty rockin' older ladies here on Spark (and when I say older..I just mean older than me...I am approaching 40 fast, so "older" is just older than me. - please do not take offense) that I have some into contact with and they are pretty darned awesome!!!!

DOING A BIG SHOUT OUT TO ALL THE INSPIRATION LADIES IT THE HOUSE!!!!
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Maybe it's a part of me looking into the future ... assessing where I want to be.. I don't really know if I have done that before or at least not in a long time for me to remember thinking about it, but it is exciting and thrilling and awesome when you really think about it. All that possibility... all that potential!

Cool emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NEW-CAZ 1/25/2013 8:59AM

    Adore Dame Helen Mirren, amazing lady. loved this post! emoticon

Comment edited on: 1/25/2013 8:59:55 AM

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SNOOKUMS19 1/19/2013 6:11PM

    Love this!!!! Helen Mirren is my hero!!!! Love the movie Red! There is a sequel coming out this year!

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KANOE10 1/17/2013 9:37AM

    I am one of the older women. The funny thing is that it hits you fast and you find that you are older. Yet I am happier than I have been when I was younger and overweight.

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HEALTHYLU1 1/16/2013 7:01AM

    I loved this post! Helen rocks, and I really like seeing her and other actresses that are not 25 get juicy parts!
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PEACEWYTCH72 1/15/2013 7:15AM

    Helen Mirren in my hero! When I am the age she is, I hope I am rockin' it like she does!

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MNNICE 1/13/2013 3:02PM

    Even on my best day 20 years ago I wouldn't have been able to keep up with the activities of some of the 70 yr olds on here!

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TINAJANE76 1/13/2013 1:25PM

    Helen Mirren's one of my favorites too! She was gorgeous as a younger woman and is a real role model for growing older gracefully and with tons of style. If I look half as good as she does when I'm her age, I'll be thrilled!

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DALID414 1/13/2013 1:21PM

    I admire the previous generations too. I especially don't want to see my decades adding up with medical issues, so it's a good reminder (try) to stay healthy now.

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CELIAMINER 1/13/2013 9:49AM

    Know what you mean! At 56, I look at my almost-80 MIL and think, "I wanna be like her when I grow up!"

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KITT52 1/13/2013 9:08AM

    have a healthy week...

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BROOKLYN_BORN 1/13/2013 9:03AM

    Older is definitely a relative term. On Friday I told a woman in my aerobics/weights class that I wanted to be her in 23 years. She's 88! She can't do all the moves and she uses light weights, but she's still at the gym.


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FLGIRL1234 1/13/2013 9:00AM

    I can so relate. I am approaching 40 too (oh man did I just say that out loud?) and I am trying like heck to age gracefully. Being an overweight old person does not appeal to me. Hmmm I wonder why. P.s. i love Reba. Talk about aging nicely.

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NELLJONES 1/13/2013 8:41AM

    I remember when we weren't supposed to trust anyone over 30, which made us Time Magazine's Person of the Year in 1966. Now that I'm over 60 it's pretty funny. I used to imagine being 60 as 25 with gray hair. Hardly.

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NEW-CAZ 1/13/2013 5:48AM

    You are so right! There are some awesome ladies on here who are an inspiration.

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My awesome day

Thursday, January 10, 2013

OK... I just realized that the very first blog someone new will read on here in the last 4 days was about gas... my gas inducing Colon Blow goo. emoticon Lovely!!!

So yesterday, I had an awesome day.

It was totally not weightloss - maintenance - exercise related either (Hmmm or now that I think about it... was it?) Well, anyway.. It was work related.

I don't reallly talk about work on here, but let me just say this one thing: Change is a-comin' in 2013 and yesterday, my soon--to-be new boss, well, I impressed the SH** out of him! emoticon Oh yes...I said that. He came into the day thinking one thing, and my agenda was something completely different, and guess what, it was just what we needed to do! WOOHOO! Give this girl a gold medal! And it's not like it's going to get easy at all - I am UBER SUPER busy even more so now, but it's all manageable if we take things one step at a time.

So anyway....that was my awesome day. I was awesome. Work was awesome. New boss is awesome. I hope and pray it stays this awesome. Nope....no pressure at all, Pollyanna! emoticon

But I will say this: the universe always tends to balance things out because I walked into my house all smiles and everyone basically turned to me and was like "what?" emoticon "everything has been going nuts here.. so and so fell, this one is a pain with his homework... sorry to bust you bubble when you "galavant" in here, but we got things to do". Hmmmm, gee thanks family - way to kill a girls buzz. emoticon

So I shut up....and got to work... and eventually got an apology at dinner, and I didn't overeat (like I would tend to want to do), and then the day continued to progress into o.k-ness into the night.

Hey - just speaking the truth... awesome balanced out with other people reality is life! LOL Ups and downs are like "peas and carrots."- they just get along.

OK - back to my awesome day.

So my new co-worker was looking at photo's on the wall...past photos. I had already told him that I was maintaining 50 pounds gone..and he kinda didn't believe me.. until he saw the pictures. I also have this bracelet that OAKBORN sent me that says
UNBREAKABLE and he also saw that and realized that I'm dead serious about the whole weight thing.

He asked me if I was "stict" about my eating and I just told him - at 10am, I will be disappearing and cramming a granola bar into my mouth while I work, because I eat when I am hungry and that is the time I am hungry...every single day. emoticon

The look on his face was hysterical and he said, "hey, whatever you need to do".

And I told him about how I was laughing at all the cookies and crap they have at the office.. I told him that it would have been kryptonite years ago, but now it's AOK and I really don't care if it's there or not. Again, I got that pensive nod that indicated, 'Wow , this girl is determined". I just told him it is what it is...and that is it.

It's funny what other people see now that I am thinner and when they first meet me. They have NO idea what's going on in my head (and vice versa right? LOL)

OMG - I didn't think this blog was going to be about weight, and low and behold, here it is again! LOL Won't you ever go away?? emoticon No, I guess not, my dear old nagging little friend!

PS - Just wanted to say THANKS to all the friend-adds I got in the last 4 days - WHOA! is a word that comes to mind. I will try to get to visit you all soon... most likely tomorrow because right now.. oh, life is getting in the way! AAAAAHHHHHH!!! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KANOE10 1/11/2013 7:32AM

    That was a great day for you. I am glad you like your new boss. Yes, it is interesting to meet people who did not know you 50 pounds ago. I am used to those office goodies also and stay away from them! Glad you got your family settled in.

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TASOGAREBAN 1/10/2013 3:03PM

    Your Awesome day was so much better than my Meh day, lol! emoticon

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DALID414 1/10/2013 11:36AM

    No medal, just a emoticon or a emoticon or if you prefer the best SP emoticon, the old emoticon
Ha! Ha! Ha!

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OAKBORN 1/10/2013 10:38AM

    Well you DESERVE every friend-add my UNBREAKABLE friend! You deal with the crises of life with a grace and agility that leaves me in awe of you!! emoticon

Not like I thought you would do anything BUT impress the living daylights out of your new boss! It's what you do and who you are! emoticon

And I loved the Colon Blow blog, it made me LMAO! emoticon

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REBECCATKD 1/10/2013 9:14AM

    Yes, it's going to be a great year -- all-around!
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FLGIRL1234 1/10/2013 7:36AM

    Great job impressing the boss! 2013 is YOUR year girl!
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NEW-CAZ 1/10/2013 7:19AM

    Good for you, glad you had a great day.
Leading by example and spreading the spark- maybe more will give up their crappy eating habits having seen your results! emoticon

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The tale of the mush.

Thursday, January 03, 2013

Ok... so here's the deal. I had bought, more like overbought, 3 boxes of Kashi 7-grain Pilaf a few months back because they were on sale...and I make a soup with it that I lovingly refer to as "Colon Blow" emoticon , well, the the thing is, that soup is good for like, once a year thing or otherwise, you'd feel like this emoticon and then this emoticon and then this emoticon .. ALL THE TIME!

Unless you like that sort of thing... you sick twisted masochist! emoticon

So now I have hubby telling me every so often that there are still 2 boxes downstairs in the basement .. are we gonna use them or not ... (I was hoping that our occasional seasonal house guests, Mickey and Minnie, would find them as a mid-winter treat, but alas, they have not) ... blah blah blah. Now i gotta figure out what to do with them besides Colon Blow Soup.

Break out the crockpot! I read somewhere about overnight breakfast porridge... I look it up...and low and behold, there it is! I follow the directions (mostly) and whallah! breakfast is served. emoticon

And it sucked emoticon

Well, I ate it - OK, I forced myself to eat my half cup serving... it's GOOD for me! I MADE it! I HAVE TO EAT IT!!

But the kids, try as they may, they flat out tried it and hated it.

Exit 2 cups gone to the trash and 6 cups left in the crockpot. emoticon

and I HATE waste... so it's time to redoctor what's left! I will show them! This will be GREAT!

Enter butter, brown sugar, a banana - coat the bottom of a cassrole dish, add 2 cups mush on top and add more brown sugar. Oh yeah...and salt. Even wall-paper paste needs some salt, or so I have learned with this escapade in mush repurposing.

Baked it this morning . .. with not too bad results! I ate it.. again. emoticon Can't even count the butter and most of the sugar because the flavor only penetrated a small bit of the mush-brick that was in my bowl and the rest was laft behind in a liquid form back in the casserole dish. emoticon

So you see... I am SO good right? Colon cleansing goodness... repurposing.. bein' green and economical. Yeah... I got it goin' on! emoticon

emoticon Hold on a minute here.
emoticon What is all this gurgling going on.
emoticon You IDIOT! You forgot about the lentil soup you ate last night, didn't you!
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emoticon You know what the kashi + the lentil soup is, genius? Don't you remember??
emoticon Silly silly girl!!! You inadvertantly made Colon Blow Soup in a 2 day process, but inside yourself!!!
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To say that my insides are rolling, well, how can I describe this nicely... All of you who had kids, remember when they were moving inside your womb? stretching, having hiccups, flipping? Close your eyes, take a moment, think back. Well...um, they ya go... that is what is goin' on! emoticon

OMG!!! Where is my water?!?!?! emoticon emoticon emoticon

I need it! STAT! We need to get this stuff OUT ASAP!

Oh, WHAT HAVE IT DONE! emoticon

My family is going to HATE me later! There is no way around this.. there is no feminine delicacy when one consumes Colon Blow. emoticon

Oh the horror!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

This is a learning moment for SURE! and I cannot even blame anyone but myself! Suuuure, I can blame the hubby, but what good will that do??!?! Absolutely nothing. emoticon

Oh well... I am sure this too shall pass in due time (literally)... but in the meantime... such JOY! such FUN! This is going to be a fanTAStic day! I can feel it..right here, in my gut!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BARB4HEALTH 1/9/2013 4:26PM

    emoticon HAHAHAHA!
Re-purposing doesn't always work, but look at the fun you had writing the blog. OK. OK. maybe that was a little Polyanna, but I do like to look for the silver lining in all clouds. And guess what? sometimes it comes up gold!

emoticon for sharing.

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NEW-CAZ 1/7/2013 3:25PM

    emoticon

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REBECCATKD 1/3/2013 8:50PM

    Disgustingly hysterical! I daresay it was worth the Colon Blow just to post that blog.

emoticon (Kashi baby)

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DEE1221 1/3/2013 7:09PM

    you are so funny!!! emoticon

I just cracked when I heard "Colon Blow".

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KITT52 1/3/2013 1:17PM

    hope you are back to regular soon....lol



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ANNIEONLI 1/3/2013 11:06AM

    Glad y'all liked my tale!!

I am trying to make the Kashi "Cleansing" Soup (aka Colon Blow) available on Sparkrecipes..You know...in case you are feeling "adventurous" emoticon I think it takes a while for things to be accepted as public on there, so maybe check back in a few days...

and I think I might be another pound down tomorrow after all is said and done! emoticon

Comment edited on: 1/3/2013 11:22:52 AM

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DALID414 1/3/2013 10:44AM

    Oh no! Eating healthy takes practice. emoticon

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KANOE10 1/3/2013 10:37AM

    That wa a fun blog to read. Now with all of that cleansing maybe the scale would be nice and go down to reward you for your cleansing efforts. I hope you feel better soon!
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Comment edited on: 1/3/2013 10:45:07 AM

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-AMANDA79- 1/3/2013 10:19AM

    emoticon Hope you don't have any bridal showers or tea parties to attend today!!

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OAKBORN 1/3/2013 10:18AM

    You did it again... actually WORSE than usual... I almost did a full on "jeg" (the term given by friends for a peculiar thing that happens to me when I get absolutely, hysterically amused... I generally end up on the floor, catatonically gasping for air making high pitched noises as I attempt to stop laughing). emoticon

I hope you and your colon are friends again tomorrow! emoticon

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ASHPATCH11 1/3/2013 10:08AM

    fun read with all the icons!


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JULIEANNCAN 1/3/2013 9:57AM

    Good job with being creative! I hope you feel better soon!

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