ANNIEONLI   45,479
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ANNIEONLI's Recent Blog Entries

Ohhh the possibilities that await me...

Friday, May 31, 2013

Good morning!!! How are ya? I'm great here!

Oh...and great AND I am now officially unemployed! WOOHOO!

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And no, I have not lost my mind, but rather I am choosing not to be a Debbie-Downer... and to think of all of the possibilities that I have to choose from ahead of me!

A client said to me last week that I looked "conflicted" when he asked what I was going to do now that I am "retired." I thought that was a good word to use. "Conflicted" it is!

"Conflicted" works because (and I hate to brag) I am a good at a whoooooollllle lotta things. Crafts, music, writing, working with people, public speaking, teaching, business practices etc. etc. - I have passion for a lot of things and thus the word "conflicted" suiting me just fine for now.

"Conflicted" because I'm also in the mid-life crisis phase of my life too....what do I want to do that will make me uber-happy and not think of "work" and "WORK"??? Eesh. THAT is the ultimate question at hand.

So today is a emoticon for me to find out what some of those answers are.....oh, while applying for unemployment, tweaking the resume, and emailing a few potential temp agencies "just in case" there might be a management position open somewhere... outthere... right before summer starts... the WORST possible time to look for a job. emoticon

See.... taking it with a grain of salt today because I have to... but I also have to do things with the family (the calendar is FULL already) and THAT is where making family memories make you richer than any job out there. emoticon

So wish me luck! and have a very Sparky day everyone!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GODIVADSG 6/2/2013 2:21PM

    Love your sparkle.... it is contagious! Enjoy the adventure! emoticon

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DWEXCEL 6/1/2013 7:10AM

    I just love your attitude, too! Sometimes, wonderful things come in unexpected ways......

Take your time, no need to rush! Enjoy this summer break with your kids.....they won't be kids for long!!!!

In the meantime, your doing all the right things, and I just know the right and "perfect" opportunity will be there for you!

Have fun camping! I heard it's hot up there!!!!

Good for you Girl!!!!
Donna

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ANNIEONLI 6/1/2013 6:39AM

    Just wanted to pop in right here and give everyone a big huge emoticon for being so supportive ... ALWAYS! emoticon

I'd come around to everyone, but I'm heading out ALL day today to a campground I volunteer at, and then tomorrow is a Communion - when business rains, it pours! LOL

Just so everyone knows, the "retirement" is really just that...the doctor I worked for retired after 40 years of working and I closed up the office..so it sort of is my retirement as well! after being there 20 years, I am totally jazzed about doing something new...and meeting new people!

Huge emoticon and Sparky emoticon emoticon friends!

Have a great day!

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JESSICABOOTY 5/31/2013 8:37PM

    It hurts to hear it but sometimes being unemployed is the best that can happen. It gives your mind the freedom to wonder and play. It's the reset button. I know you'll make the most of this time and come roaring back 110%
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MCFITZ2 5/31/2013 1:17PM

    Best of luck on finding your way. Choices and more choices. emoticon

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DALID414 5/31/2013 12:49PM

    Good luck!! Stay positive.

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YAMINOKODOMO 5/31/2013 11:59AM

    I love your positive attitude! I am sorry to hear about your job loss but hey! Sometimes thats a good thing because then you start to focus on what you would love to do for work as opposed to what you have to do. And it seems like you love to do a lot of things! You also have some time to do all those family things without the extra headache of having to go to work emoticon

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NEW-CAZ 5/31/2013 10:42AM

    i wish you luck with new employment opportunities Annie, you have many talents, I know something will turn up soon!

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REBECCATKD 5/31/2013 10:34AM

    The very best of luck to you!
You know, my husband hated his job for all of the 19 years that he worked at it. He quit in January 2012, spent a year as Mr. Mom, and recently began driving a school bus. He only works 22 hours a week, has plenty of down time to run all those weird errands (take dog to vet, get oil change, etc.), and is perfectly happy for the first time in years. He says he'll actually miss his job over the summer.

So don't think about money; think about where you can use your talents to help out where needed. It's an adventure!

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KELLIEBEAN 5/31/2013 8:05AM

    Taking it with a grain of salt is the way to go. Life comes in waves, ride that surf board with a smile baby!

I wish you great things!

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KANOE10 5/31/2013 7:20AM

    I wish you luck on your new job possibilities, Spark Friend! With your positive energy and creativity, I know you will find a new career that is not just "work" but something that is meaningful to you. You are right about the precious family time bringing a richness to our lives.
Have a wonderful Spark Day.
My sons are home for the summer and I am happy to see them.

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DMEYER4 5/31/2013 7:18AM

  good luck on your happiness searching . I hope you find something that makes you very happy. Now is a good time to soul search when you do not have to go to work. Have a great day

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JGRAY76 5/31/2013 7:15AM

    Best of luck to you as you resolve your conflicted but temporary situation. Your positive attitude will serve you well.

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The poundage creep

Saturday, May 25, 2013

When I was gaining weight back in the day, I could tell you how I felt with every 10 pounds I gained.

By the time I would hit the single digit placement of a "6" (ie, 156, 166, 176, 186) I was already resign to the fact that it was too late, I was a failure at life in general, and I was already in the next section of the 10's placement...so why bother. And with that, year, after year, I gained weight.

That was how I thought.... much to my mental and physical anguish, that honestly, I have never really vocalized until now.

Why now? Well, that is a good question.

Every so often, my brain thinks like that - "well, here comes the "6" again...loser" emoticon

And I have to fight back those old brain patterns that got me into trouble 5 to 20 years ago.

It's not easy to do, but I do it anyway now...because let's face it, being cogniscient of behavior patterns is a big part of winning the battle of the bulge. It's a learned thing too...full of trial and error (sadly, many more errors than we'd all like to admit to too).

So instead of resigning to the higher number when I see the "6" on the scale, I turn to what I know to be true - the real truth - my beloved nutrition tracker - and I take immediate stock of what is going into my body and how I am using it (or not using it).

And it works every single time I have done that.

There is no creep into the next 10s placement.

There is no having to buy new clothes in the next size up (although at this point, I have reworn things so much my wardrobe is sad all due to the fact that I DON't buy new clothes! LOL that is another blog entirely!!!)

There is no mental put-down and inevitable slide into a mini-depression (my own terminology for my funk). That difference alone is HUGE!

So here is what I am proposing to you, reader, if you have that funky mental creep come into your world and onto your scale...think about things in a different light, do something simple like tracking your nutrition (yes, the good the bad and the ugly you have eaten), and see what happens instead of reaching for the "comfort food of your choice" to make the bad thoughts go away via your tummy.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SASSYSACY 6/5/2013 2:22PM

    Your blogs are always well written and I so enjoy!

Thanks for sharing as always!


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DWEXCEL 6/4/2013 8:37AM

    I am so glad that you posted this and that I read it today!!!!

The timing was perfect. I have really been struggling with this the last couple of weeks. I have made it a goal to increase my cardio to burn off extra fat and calories, and I have been very successful.......with increasing my cardio......I am doing the elliptical like crazy.....increasing my time/intensity/calories everyday! However.......I am gaining weight!!!! And not just a couple of pounds...... I was sooo close to breaking that 140 mark.....,now I looking back at the 150 end spot!!!!

So I really needed this! I'm the best tracker in the world.......for exercise.....but when it comes to nutrition tracking, I'm the biggest slacker!!! And I know this! And I know I've let myself have a little of this, or a little more of that......and look what it's done for me. I'm so bummed because I have my physical coming up on June 19th, and I knew my doctor was going to be so proud of me for having hit 140 or maybe even below....but now I'm closer to 150 than 140.....****

So I know what I have to do, and thank you for reminding me of it!

Luv ya Girl!!!!
Donna emoticon emoticon

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HEALTHYLU1 5/31/2013 7:22AM

    This is a truly great blog, and I love REBECCATKD response!

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JESSICABOOTY 5/30/2013 3:59PM

    Oh, the reach for the comfort food, is so strong.
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MILLIE5522 5/27/2013 2:38PM

    Great blog!

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NUOVAELLE 5/26/2013 3:36AM

    It's funny, Annie, I've got the same "6 disease" but in terms of kilograms! That's the main reason I want to be down to 65. So, I can feel that I truly belong to the 60s and be further away from the 70s!!
I really liked Rebecca's conversation, though! We could use it every time the scale shows a number we feel is unwelcome!
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ANNIEONLI 5/25/2013 1:41PM

    Funny you say that about the 2 or the 3, because that is my where "My happy place" is! Truly it is better than the "6!"

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DALID414 5/25/2013 1:39PM

    How crazy that mine would be the 6, too! Although I'm working on getting a 0 at the end of my number so then my number would be the 2 or 3. Being short makes the number leash shorter, too! emoticon

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OAKBORN 5/25/2013 12:22PM

    Oh yeah! Sing it! I have been fighting the creep myself and he is a CREEP! After 2 months of bad sleep, illness, stress, I have to buckle in and stay there.

GRUMP!

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ANNIEONLI 5/25/2013 10:22AM

    LOL Beccs..I like that and it's sorta kinda, but I can abbreviate it even more cut and dry like "Hell NO!!!"
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REBECCATKD 5/25/2013 9:22AM

    I was picturing the conversation:

"Oh, hello Six. I see you've stopped by again. I'm afraid you can't stay long; I was just about to go work out and then cook a healthy meal. But it was good to see you because you're a wonderful reminder of how I've changed my life. Thank you, Six. Let me see you out."

(Does that work for you?) emoticon

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NEW-CAZ 5/25/2013 9:11AM

    Great advice! emoticon emoticon

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NELLJONES 5/25/2013 8:39AM

    Ever notice how the number that made you cringe on the way up looks good when you got higher? Then on the way down it's celebration instead of cringing. Now if people could only adjust to the time differential: it took a long time ( year after year you said), and everyone wants it to be faster on the way down. Your planner and your patience will be rewarded.

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KANOE10 5/25/2013 8:32AM

    That is an excellent blog. I love "So instead of resigning to the higher number when I see the "6" on the scale, I turn to what I know to be true - the real truth - my beloved nutrition tracker - and I take immediate stock of what is going into my body and how I am using it (or not using it).

And it works every single time I have done that.

There is no creep into the next 10s placement. "

This successfully describes what we deal with when we have up pounds., It simply tells you what you need to do..but also lets you know that you can stop the creep and that tracking works.

I also had those negative all of nothing thoughts for years and gave up and bought new clothes so many times. Now I am focused on maintenance and fitting the clothes I have now.

Thanks for dealing with a subject and feelings we all share. I have decided that instead of calling it up pounds....I will call them the creep pounds. That suggests movement and the need for action!!!!!

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EVIE4NOW 5/25/2013 8:09AM

  Good advice.. thanks.

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JOHNMARTINMILES 5/25/2013 8:02AM

    It is your attitude and not your aptitude that determines your altitude.

Make Today a Great Day!

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Fear

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Fear can be debilitating.

You stand there... thinking.

You know you should do something... act out... but you can't.

Instead of moving forward, you take the whole situtation, crumbling it up into a tiny wad, and shove it back into your pocket, where you secretly hope it will be forgotten about, or fall out of your pocket, or even better, it will just get destroyed in the wash.

But it doesn't...it's still there in some form, even after the wash.

After the wash, sometimes it stays whole, just a little morphed, but most of the time, it breaks up into undistinguishable little pieces, but now it's all over everything else... onto your favorite thing, like little tiny blobs of goo that even the dryer won't be able to sort out.

Getting it back together is hopeless at this point... it's time to chuck the whole lot.

And just think, if you actually took the fear out of your pocket - faced it head on right there and then... well, you'd have something completely new in your hand instead of a useless ruined thing.

______________________________

Here are my 2 worst fears:

1) I have not put in my name or my story into Spark Success Stories "officially" because I am scared. Scared that I will gain the weight back and be a hippocrite in my own eyes once I do that. The same goes for the National Weight Control Registry and a recent survery I was sent by the Maintenance Group. I don't want to jinx anything...silly,I know, but there it is.

2) I am scared to put into words several businesses plans because every time I have said something to someone - the "devil's advocates" come out and all I need is support, the pros, the "you can do it, that's a great idea!"... not the cons. I don't need the cons right now. The cons will come in time - and get ironed out in time...that's part of the learning process. I know I have said stuff and failed before too (really, that is what bothers me the most - I bite off way more than I can chew and then crash and burn) but then again, I started Spark without support, without homefront fanfare - I can be successful at this too if I just try and believe in myself... If I just get brave and set attainable goals.

There it is - I need to be brave. I need to face the fear. I did it before, I can do it again. I cannot let fear hold me back.

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So what is your fear...what is holding you back?

PS A friend on FB just posted this...had to share

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REBECCATKD 5/22/2013 11:17AM

    Maintenance is hard work, too. When you decide to submit your story, perhaps you can alleviate your fears by admitting that it's not over; it's never over. A healthy, fit lifestyle requires dedication and commitment (just like a healthy marriage!) You could inspire many people by including your thoughts on maintenance because, unfortunately, many of us lose weight, gain it right back, and then give up. Your maintenance is a HUGE part of your success story!!

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GOLOPTIOUS 5/22/2013 11:06AM

    You're a success story to me whether you put your name and story anywhere. You are one of my motivators. And you know what? Even if you were to gain weight back I know that you would never give up on yourself and you'd keep improving and that in itself is a success.



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KANOE10 5/22/2013 8:55AM

    Behind the fear, there is the fear of failure. I am trying to accept myself as not being perfect in weight maintenance. I joined the National Registry to define myself as a maintainer and to hopefully give input to study maintenance. Half of the people on the registry are trying to lose up pounds. Obviously lots of people are not perfect.

You are right about facing the fear and acting on it, being the way to go. You have shown such strength in your life, maintaining your weight all of these years. I know you will figure out this business fear..and find yourself where you want to be.

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DWEXCEL 5/22/2013 7:06AM

    It's funny, (but not funny ha ha), but you just don't seem like a person to be paralyzed by fear. You are always so strong and positive, that is just doesn't seem possible that you would be a "real person" and have fear(s) just like real people do.

I totally relate to your metaphorically story describing fear. One thing I do know is that, all that CRAP that we put ourselves through WORRYING about and STRESSING about the issue is 9 out of 10 times much worse than the issue turns out to be.......Just think about that

Now I know "That's easy for me to say".......as I am one who even though I know it, I still worry and stress and make things worse by doing that. And sometimes, I just go....OMG.....that was it.....that's all there was to it.....after I've put myself through the wringer sometimes for days!!!!

But, at any rate, We know you are a strong woman who has come a very long way! You have tremendous support, and from what I've read about you, you have it at home now too!

So, wouldn't it be better to just meet your fear HEAD-ON.....get it over with, and use all that worry/stress energy right then.....rather than letting it eat you alive.

Well, I hope I will take my own advise too! But you can do this Girl!!!! You can do anything!!!

Love you, my Friend!

And, BTW....."Don't ever let Anyone (or Anything) Dull your Spark"!!!!! emoticon emoticon

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DALID414 5/21/2013 10:31PM

    Currently my fear is my boss leaving to Israel and leaving me 'in charge' of the business he started. I didn't sign up to be in charge, I wanted to start at the bottom of the food chain and mill around there for a bit. emoticon I'm not ready for a real grown up job.

Here's me being your pro: emoticon

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KRISKECK 5/21/2013 1:59PM

    One of my favorite recent blog posts is entitled "Avoiding fear by indulging in our fear of fear" . It was written by Seth Godin, and his premise is that we paralyze ourselves by not facing the things that we are afraid will inspire fear in us. "Every day, we make a thousand little compromises, avoid opportunities, actions and people, all so that we can stay away from the emotion of fear." Not staying away from the things we fear, but from the very emotion. I think that's so true for so many of us, and so limiting. I printed it out and hung it on the wall and am trying to face the emotion of fear when I feel it in the vicinity. Your blog reminded me of that. Thanks!

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NUOVAELLE 5/21/2013 1:40PM

    Fear of failure.
Fear of letting ourselves down.
Fear of failing in the eyes of the people in our lives.
No matter how you call it, it's always the same fear. And it's rooted deep inside us since our early childhood - at least in my case. And we can really find the strength inside us to overcome it. And someone who believes in us and is always there to remind us of what we've achieved is a great help.
I believe in you, Annie. And I know you'll face your fears. Because if you think about it, that's what you've been doing successfully for a long time. You just never took the last tiny step towards proving it to yourself.
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Found a cute pic

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DWEXCEL 5/22/2013 6:46AM

    Love it!

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NEW-CAZ 5/17/2013 3:10AM

    emoticon

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SASSYSACY 5/16/2013 4:24PM

    Great pic and great attitude!

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NUOVAELLE 5/16/2013 2:06AM

    Nice! Keep on spark(l)ing, Annie!
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WATERMELLEN 5/15/2013 10:03PM

    Cute indeed! And thanks for your kind comment on my four year blog!

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DEE1221 5/15/2013 6:39PM

    So very true!
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KANOE10 5/15/2013 6:06PM

    Lovely picture to keep the sparkle in spark!

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ONCEUPONABOD 5/15/2013 2:17PM

    Good advice!

Thanks for keeping all your posts on your SparkPage! I just skimmed through and feel inspired. Once again, I'm trying to fan my spark into a flame. The good news this time around is I think my husband is on board. Yippee!

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BROWNCOFIDDLER 5/15/2013 11:32AM

    emoticon emoticon

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DALID414 5/15/2013 11:18AM

    Awesome! Very apropos for this site!

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KATIEM929 5/15/2013 11:12AM

    Super cute! :)
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NSV - Perfect blood work results

Friday, May 10, 2013

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To say that I am happy and smiling is an understatement.

I am ELATED to the 15th power!!! emoticon

I will not lie...the last time I had blood work done I was pregnant with my 3rd (he's almost 7 now) and I was heavy...and even then it was pretty good for my weight...maybe a little on the higher side for cholesterol (I think I remember a 190 or 209 number somewhere)..maybe that was from my pre-second 3rd baby bloodwork. I forget. All I DO know is that is was a long long time ago.

So why did I go to the doctor now and get this done.

Simple. I turned 40.

And that is what you do when you turn 40. You go for a physical and get blood work and tests, and all sorts of things as a base line now that things are going to fall to pieces. emoticon

Well, really it's because I needed to because I haven't and I should, and we found a new doctor, etc. etc. etc..... and I was curious too.

I was curious as to how all this "lifestyle change" was working for me besides me feeling great and looking better than I ever have in my life (hey, that part is going to be gone soon enough, might as well live that part up a little! LoL)

When I started Sparkpeople, what I wanted first and foremost was to be healthy and to FEEL better...everything else that came along with it was going to be just an added bonus.

Well, I can honestly say that the mission and main goal has officially been accomplished!!!!!!!
emoticon And I have the paperwork to prove it!

Perfect cholesterol levels.
Perfect blood pressure.
Perfect white blood cell and red blood cell and all those good things.
Perfect liver enzymes.
Perfect thyroid numbers.
All in range for everything else doctory and confusing if you don't have a physician's desk reference. emoticon

To say I was happy to hear the doctors report...well, it's an understatement.
It's physical proof that I am doing something right.

I can't imagine what those numbers would be today if I didn't take the reigns of control back in 2008. I seriously cannot wrap my head around it....because I remember acutely how crappy I felt for the previous 20 years..and how sad I was... and how shy, and how just plain icky things were even though life was happy and good and blessed. All that needed fixing really was my health...and noone could do that except me.

I'm glad I helped me.

I'm glad my sister sent me the Sparkpeople link and told me to check it out.

I'm glad that I finally found a place to work it all out.

I'm glad I stuck with it, made Sparkfriends (good heavens, you know who you are! and there are many many to name!) and built up a support system within the support system.

I'm glad I recorded everything ... every step of the way.

I am so frickin' glad it's not funny.

So a big shout out to Spark once again...for being here to help everyone who needs it.

Thanks Chris Downie... emoticon from the bottom of my healthy emoticon

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TINAJANE76 5/14/2013 7:09PM

    Great stuff! THIS is what it's all about!

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OAKBORN 5/14/2013 9:42AM

    If nobody has told you this today: You are emoticon !!!!!!!!!

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SASSYSACY 5/13/2013 1:02PM

    Youv'e worked so hard and you deserve it! Good for you!

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DWEXCEL 5/12/2013 4:38PM

    Well, there you go! You have proven what it takes to get healthy, and that exercise and eating right are the best medicine for anything:)

Awesome job! So Proud of you!

Donna

P.S. Mine is always good too!

Comment edited on: 5/12/2013 4:40:08 PM

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DALID414 5/11/2013 1:22AM

    I want perfect paperwork too!

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BROOKLYN_BORN 5/10/2013 7:13PM

    That's wonderful news!

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MILLIE5522 5/10/2013 6:16PM

    emoticon emoticon Fantastic!!!

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NUOVAELLE 5/10/2013 2:41PM

    Congratulations Annie! That's great news!
You've been definitely doing something right and you've been inspiring others to do the same. Keep up the great job! I'm asking this from the bottom of my healthy heart! (I liked this one!)
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LOSE4LIFE47 5/10/2013 1:30PM

    emoticon

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GERARLAUR 5/10/2013 1:29PM

    Excellent job!

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