Wednesday, June 25, 2008
A couple of things went on this week that are totally awesome!!
I lost 2 pounds! I jumped on the scale for S&G (that's S%@#&'s and Giggles for my friends - it's a term that I sometimes use, well, for S&G!) I digress...the scale. It said 153! I sort of had no movement for 2 weeks and exercise was lackluster (as it has been lately...I'm working on a new schedue). I digress...again. Well, after getting ready for my son's 4th b-day party and teacher gifts, and prep for camping....blah blah blah - somehow, in there, 2 pounds came off! I have to thank diet for this one!
Last Friday, I B-blogged about family and crap, and my body was sooo hungry that I ate more than my usual for the day. I'll say overindulged to be nice to myself. I thought it was stress/emotional eating going on. But finally the hunger went away and I felt satisfied. I thought, well there goes any movement on the scale this week! and shrugged it off and started over the next day. I've never really thought about it until the next day, that my body must have been needing someting that I wasn't supplying - some extra calories. Instead of fighting my "craving" - I gave in and ate that extra half piece of pizza and had a chocolate pretzel rod, (OK , it was 3).
By listening to my body - I learned something new. Cravings are there for a reason. If it's a true craving, just get rid of it and be done with it. Don't torture yourself into thinking it will go away, because that is when binging happens. That's what I think, at least.
OK - that being said...I had yesterday off and all to myself - a rare day in my world!! The kids were all in school and the office was super slow, so we did not schedule the day at all. Because we are camping this week, I had a butt load of stuff to get the kids - for underwear and socks to bathing suits to paper bowls to sunscreen to sandals and sneakers - you name it - I needed to get it. Gas is expensive now, so I figured K-mart was the best place to go to get everything done. Early shopping at 8:30 - the place is dead.
SO I'm in the ladies department and saw my favorite thing - the clearance rack! My size 12s are looking really baggy in the butt area - I think I will be a large on top forever and my butt with keep shrinking til it's a size zero...anyway, I grapped 2 capris in a 9/10 and a bunch of large tops and went to the fitting room. The 9/10s were for S&G to see if , maybe, I could squeeze my butt into them....well the darn things FIT!!
I HAVE NEVER, IN MY ENTIRE LIFE, BEEN A SIZE 10 - NEVER EVER EVER!!!
Talk about being pumped! I bought both of them. It gave me some oomph to get to my goal weight even more now...and maybe even beyond that. I accept these things - my chest will always be larger than my hips, it's the way I am built, my butt will always be flat and narrow...but the weight will eventually come off and I'll tone as much as I can within my lifetime to be less mushy and stronger. I'll get there...eventually.
I still can't believe that I own a size 10 piece of clothing! Do linen capri's bronze well? I think they deserve to be saved for all eternity. Those puppies will NEVER be thrown out. Ever...
Monday, June 23, 2008
All good things come to those who wait.
When I first joined SP on Feb 7th - the aspect of belonging to such a huge thing was a little daunting. Insecurity and self-consiousness were there even though noone could see me and reading people's banter had me a little envious of that comraderie.
So, like this new lifestyle change, I took a leap of faith and jumped in with both feet. The more I posted, the more comfortable I felt; and in turn, the more confident about myself and my new endeavor, the better I did with my lifestyle change. If was the support and encouragement of others that was the key for me.
SP "advertises" that if you just reach out to the community, people will be there to help you along, pick you up and dust you off again, and put you back on your path. It is so true.
Friendships take time to build...but when they are there, they are unwavering (for me at least). If you are just starting out on SP - give it a go with the community - it will surprise you. And if you don't blog a whole lot or chat, try it, you might find the key that was missing in your lifestyle change.
So my conclusion is this - all good things come to those who wait...who persevere...who strive to better themselves...who listen...who contribute...who accept you for who you are...who take that leap of faith.
Friday, June 20, 2008
I don't really B-blog, as I like to call it. And it seems that every Friday is when I want/need to do it...so I guess I am going to give into temptation today and just vent. And all I want to do is eat, so I might as well do some therapy blogging to try and circumvent the situation!
I give. All the time. Almost to a fault. I never say no. I never ask for things in return. It is just the way I am.
I've been watching my sister and sister in law's children every Mon & Fri for 6 months. Free of charge, of course. I even asked for my nephew to come on M&F because I never see him and it would save my sister daycare money. Long story there. Very sad too. It could be a book that would wrench your soul. But her life has taken a 180 and is really happy now, so there is a happy ending after all. My SIL, well another story there. Long and short of it is that she has never payed for daycare in her entire child rearing career. Someone (me or my MIL) is always there to say yes to her and since her work hours are weird b/c she is an after school early intervention person - my MIL is right in there to say yes. Thus, I never ask MIL to watch my kids b/c god forbid, she is always next door watching the other 2 golden grandchildren for her own daughter. Is there bitterness here? Hell yeah!
Let's just say - I have A LOT of payback to cash in this summer. But the chances of me cashing in are very slim. You see, DH and I are proud of the fact that we can do things on our own. We don't rely on others. It's almost to a fault. In fact, I'm trying to overcome that tendency of not asking for help. For example: My son's 4th birthday is on Sunday - well guess what? I asked everyone to bring some healthy side dish enough for 20 adults. And you know what? They all said yes. Makes it a lot more economical to entertain...and we are the entertaining family with the good entertaining house, of course!
Another thing is the tendency to rush back home because I feel, let's face it - guilt! Whenever I am alone - you name it, doing whatever - I feel the need to relieve whoever is watching the kids because that's MY job. Even when me and DH have that rare date, so sad, but once a year on our anniversary, we feel the need to rush home!! SICK! What the hell!?!!
So now it is the last Friday of the school year and I am almost free of my nephew...one more day on Mon for him AND my niece and then I get a deserved break from babysitting. Don't get me wrong - I love him as my own son, I call him #4 even and treat him as my own. That's why he loves me. But I need a break. My daydreams today are of me on a massage table for an hour & a half...then a facial and pedicure.
So now today is get ready for party day because tomorrow morning I work til 1pm and DH has the kids and is going to a 6 y.o. birthday party until 3pm. So tomorrow last minute prep is going to be just that. Clean. Bake. Weed. The whole kit & caboodle for a party. Oh and buy a gift for the little guy - I can't forget that. I probably will. Lol
So after a B-blog, it's time to count blessings, because God knows, other people have it way worse than I do. I'm thankful for the following:
- nice home
- healthy kids
- loving husband
- healthy family in general
- good climate (God help those in the flood zone)
- my new lifestyle change
- the fact that I can run & play with the kids w/o getting out of breath
- a good job that I love
- good people that I work with and the people we treat
I said to my co-worker the othe day that I took some selfish time to myself the other day and did 50 minutes on the TM while there were other things waiting to get done. Her immediate response was this - "you're the least selfish person I know - so don't you dare feel that way or say that" It's nice to hear that once in a while. Too bad the people you are not being selfish for and helping don't say thank you enough. That's why I always say thank you to everyone for the smallest things.
One thing about SP that I love - I always get a thank you for well, whatever, most of the time. And that is the nicest thing for me to get. Really.
Friday, June 13, 2008
So I got into the thing 3 years ago - short lived event...baby #3 came right after I zipped it up. LOL I wore it for Halloween, believe it or not! I truly was a sight walking around my Wisteria Place neighborhood in full bride gear! Bustier corset underneath & veil included! But it was a little snug, even then - hell, even when I got married 9 years ago!
So this time around, it was time to try it on again....and it fit! The funniest thing is that the shoulders are big! No joke! I was a little snug around the middle b/c I haven't workout in a week, but there was no corset on me this time. Teeheehee!
Believe it or not - 2 previous blogs were deleted because of distractions, I guess there were never meant to be seen! Finally, this is the blog I was supposed to write! At LAST!
NEW MINI GOAL - lose the last 5 pounds and make that dress swim on me by July 16, my 9th anniversary. Wear my wedding night trousseau again and have it look EXTRA good this time around - why not! I payed plenty for that stupid night gown set that I've worn only twice in the last 9 years! The last time I wore it - baby #3 came along...no chance of that happening now! LMAO! I feel giddy - this is what I'm supposed to do...
The other blogs before this were very yukky - b&@%$ blogs, I like to call them. I was feeling like I had no oomph or direction and feeling a little lost in my own skin, I guess. Who figured trying on a dress would turn my head around so fast.
FUTURE GOAL - My hubby doesn't know it yet, he thinks that I am joking, but it is going to happen. On our 10th anniversary, we are going to renew our vows in the back yard and have a big party - BBQ on the grill, and play a game of touch football. That's what he wanted to do 9 years ago, but in a park. My friend got his license to wed over the internet, so I'll have him officiate for us. This will happen - I can promise you that! Even if I have to surprise him - it will happen!! And I'm gonna look hot!!
Sunday, June 08, 2008
It's about 97 degrees right now - we're kicking back in the house after a couple hours of being in the pool to keep cool...the house is about 15 degrees cooler than outside, and we don't have a/c either. So in short, today was a bathing suit day!
I broke out the one I bought for myself 3 years ago...a size 14...and it fits!! It looks pretty good too! I can sit here and b*@$%# and moan about cellulite and thighs, but really - my DH could care less and my kids too...I've had stretch marks since my boobs came in when I was 11 and chubby...I'm so over that stuff. My only thing - I have NO behind. None. Like someone took it and forgot to return it. So that is what a skirt and sarong are for, right?!! LOL
This is the first time in a long time that I walked around without being self conscious. Even in front of by uber body-conscious sister. I guess when you get older, you just don't care as much as you used too. I love being 35 and not caring about crap like that!! It's great. Really.
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