ANNIEONLI   39,023
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I'm back from camping (again!) & little revelations

Friday, July 04, 2008

We got back last night from camping, and we made it a full week without killing each other!!! A week is a long time, and don't get me wrong, there was a time Tues/Wed when the kids just laid there like lumps, bored out of their skulls, but all in all, they had a blast at the beach and lots of miles-stones were made:

My oldest now rides without training wheels!
My middle guy practically jumped in the ocean with his clothes on the first time down at the shore - the last time we were there in April, he would NOT go past the dunes to even look at the ocean.
My little guy - well... he's still a weasel and addicted to his binky, but we are working on him....who wants a screaming kid being weaned off a binky during a camping trip - NOT ME! He did like the water though, but not the sand - he's like me that way.

Any trip now will be a piece of cake. 2 days - HA - no problem! I laugh at that! HaHA! We forgot some key things, like the frozen premade chicken braciole and the bacon, but that was ok...my DH made 3 racks of baby back pork ribs on a 14 inch grill that were to die for! I swear he's a gifted man - he can cook gourmet anywhere.

Food wise - meat, bread, donuts, chips. That was the diet. Water & veggies & fruits were real low...storage issues and pee issues really. So now it's "CAMPING DETOX" - water water water!!! Food shopping is tomorrow, which means - veggies, fruits and good breads and skim milk!! YAY I can't wait!!!!

So the bathing suit was REALLY funny, because my ever disappearing ass has now made my suit look stupid. I had to buy some black shorts to wear OVER the suit, and now the back part around the chestal area is getting loose!! Gimme a break!! If I really had guts, I'd post it online, but that my friends, you will never see!

So here is another random thought I had today...and if you had similar weightloss, you will experience this too...it's the mental concept that your body really is not all that bad. Think about it. Go to a beach and sit and people watch and you will see. Go to a museum and look at the sculptures and nudes of "back in the day." Women are made and depicted in a certain way for centuries for a reason - we are women! We have the round curves, the belly pouch, the poochy arms and full thighs. Every single Roman and Greek statue I have ever seen has had those similar features. Womanly, motherly, sexy features. And the artists - MEN. Think about it. Think about that power the female form has over the male...for as long as man and woman has walked the earth, the goddess and mother earth cultures. I can go all ethnographic and anthropological on you guys, but I think I made my point somehow: sometimes that little bit here and there that we HATE is what the other half loves the most about our body.

So my conclusion is this (long winded, I know, but hey, it's been a week!)
Lose what you want to lose to make you happy with your body, whatever weight that may be. Love yourself first and foremost, and that starting point will bring about such wonderful changes in your world - Confidence, Self-esteem, Time for YOU.

PS - I'll be bopping in to see y'all soon! Just give me some time to do the laundry - 5 loads easy!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IAMLION 7/7/2008 8:06AM

    Sounds like you had a great time!!

We went camping for the long weekend and it was just plain rough! Poor husband continued to make the wrong decisions and continued to get into trouble! Oldest daughter was a pain in the neck!! I was a pain in the neck to everyone else as well! The youngest was the only one who didn't get into trouble or cause other people any problems! Saturday was a much better day but by the end of the evening, we all decided to pack up our stuff (around 11:30 pm) and call it a weekend and head for home to enjoy our Sunday in peace! Sunday was definitely the best day of our whole trip! I am exhausted!

Like you, food wise I ate lots of not so good for me stuff and it tasted GREAT! Today will get back on the food and exercise track.
emoticon I am going to give it a few days but I am sure I've gained some of my weight back and will have to change my tracker emoticon oh well, today is a brand new day with a brand new clean slate!!
It's Monday, have a great day and an awesome week!!




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OAKBORN 7/5/2008 10:05PM

    Annie!

You rock! I have had similar thoughts about art from former times! We don't have to be friggin' sticks to be healthy. There are scientific benchmarks that are pretty good.... but really you are right... it's a case of really needing to feel comfortable in your own skin. The messages that society gives us leads us to some really screwed up and mixed up self-talk. We are told we need to be healthy and rail-thin at the same time. (WTF?!)

You are a commenting fool tonight, my goodness! Welcome home from camping and thanks for the pants. (Have you ever seen the cartoon "The Tick"... "come to ze pants...")

Hey considering you were away and didn't have your usual access to healthy food, you did fine! I wouldn't worry about it. Just get back on the horse... it's always waiting for you.

Your comments and blog encourage me too! Just to keep on keepin' on! Thanks my friend!

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Couldn't believe my eyes! SIZE TEN!

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

A couple of things went on this week that are totally awesome!!

I lost 2 pounds! I jumped on the scale for S&G (that's S%@#&'s and Giggles for my friends - it's a term that I sometimes use, well, for S&G!) I digress...the scale. It said 153! I sort of had no movement for 2 weeks and exercise was lackluster (as it has been lately...I'm working on a new schedue). I digress...again. Well, after getting ready for my son's 4th b-day party and teacher gifts, and prep for camping....blah blah blah - somehow, in there, 2 pounds came off! I have to thank diet for this one!

Last Friday, I B-blogged about family and crap, and my body was sooo hungry that I ate more than my usual for the day. I'll say overindulged to be nice to myself. I thought it was stress/emotional eating going on. But finally the hunger went away and I felt satisfied. I thought, well there goes any movement on the scale this week! and shrugged it off and started over the next day. I've never really thought about it until the next day, that my body must have been needing someting that I wasn't supplying - some extra calories. Instead of fighting my "craving" - I gave in and ate that extra half piece of pizza and had a chocolate pretzel rod, (OK , it was 3).

By listening to my body - I learned something new. Cravings are there for a reason. If it's a true craving, just get rid of it and be done with it. Don't torture yourself into thinking it will go away, because that is when binging happens. That's what I think, at least.

OK - that being said...I had yesterday off and all to myself - a rare day in my world!! The kids were all in school and the office was super slow, so we did not schedule the day at all. Because we are camping this week, I had a butt load of stuff to get the kids - for underwear and socks to bathing suits to paper bowls to sunscreen to sandals and sneakers - you name it - I needed to get it. Gas is expensive now, so I figured K-mart was the best place to go to get everything done. Early shopping at 8:30 - the place is dead.

SO I'm in the ladies department and saw my favorite thing - the clearance rack! My size 12s are looking really baggy in the butt area - I think I will be a large on top forever and my butt with keep shrinking til it's a size zero...anyway, I grapped 2 capris in a 9/10 and a bunch of large tops and went to the fitting room. The 9/10s were for S&G to see if , maybe, I could squeeze my butt into them....well the darn things FIT!!

I HAVE NEVER, IN MY ENTIRE LIFE, BEEN A SIZE 10 - NEVER EVER EVER!!!

Talk about being pumped! I bought both of them. It gave me some oomph to get to my goal weight even more now...and maybe even beyond that. I accept these things - my chest will always be larger than my hips, it's the way I am built, my butt will always be flat and narrow...but the weight will eventually come off and I'll tone as much as I can within my lifetime to be less mushy and stronger. I'll get there...eventually.

I still can't believe that I own a size 10 piece of clothing! Do linen capri's bronze well? I think they deserve to be saved for all eternity. Those puppies will NEVER be thrown out. Ever...

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BATHMOM 6/27/2008 11:18AM

    Whew, this was a funny one! LOL about the size zero butt!!! I have the opposite problem. I can always tell when I've lost a pound because my boobs look smaller! Oh, these bodies of ours. Gotta laugh.

I've experienced the same thing with the craving. You can kind of tell when they're nutritional (rather than emotional). And I just read an article on RealAge.com this week that said we should be eating until satisfied. Not more, but not less either. Interesting.

Well, emoticon on all your progress!

Thanks for stopping by my page the other day. Bopped you back! (That reminded me of a camp song, "Little Bunny Foo-Foo, hopping through the forest, scooping up the field mice, and bopping 'em on the head." Know it?) emoticon

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IAMLION 6/26/2008 8:54PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

I am sooooo super excited for you!!! Size 10!! You are doing awesome! I'm doing a happy dance for you right now! My family isn't too worried about me because they are used to me breaking into a crazy happy dance without warning!

I love that you are at terms with your body shape! I have come to realize that no amount of exercise, diet, etc... will give me a tiny hiney! My top keeps shrinking and my bottom is getting smaller but I'll always have a badonka donk butt! I'm fine with that, my husband likes it. emoticon

Have a great time camping! We are going next weekend for the holiday.

TTYL,

Connie

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PEACHEZ82 6/25/2008 6:23PM

    Congratulations

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RINGSTWO 6/25/2008 10:00AM

    CONGRATS.... I just experienced that same thing. Never ever been a 10, but now I am. IT FEELS GREAT!!!! Oh, and we have the tiny bottom big top thing in common ;( LOL!!!

Keep up the great work!!!

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OAKBORN 6/25/2008 9:14AM

    Anne!

Wahoo you! That is sooooo fabulous! I got into 10s yesterday too! (I'm a sale rack girl too... I even learned the words in French & German when there years ago... "soldes" and "verkauf") emoticon

emoticon on listening to your body about cravings! You are finding what works for you!!

I allow myself a little bit or an occasional taste of sweet things to keep myself satisfied... that prevents binge-ing for me!

Every happy thing for you!

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MSMISSUSME 6/25/2008 7:34AM

    YAY! Well done! emoticon

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SP Friendships

Monday, June 23, 2008

All good things come to those who wait.

When I first joined SP on Feb 7th - the aspect of belonging to such a huge thing was a little daunting. Insecurity and self-consiousness were there even though noone could see me and reading people's banter had me a little envious of that comraderie.

So, like this new lifestyle change, I took a leap of faith and jumped in with both feet. The more I posted, the more comfortable I felt; and in turn, the more confident about myself and my new endeavor, the better I did with my lifestyle change. If was the support and encouragement of others that was the key for me.

SP "advertises" that if you just reach out to the community, people will be there to help you along, pick you up and dust you off again, and put you back on your path. It is so true.

Friendships take time to build...but when they are there, they are unwavering (for me at least). If you are just starting out on SP - give it a go with the community - it will surprise you. And if you don't blog a whole lot or chat, try it, you might find the key that was missing in your lifestyle change.

So my conclusion is this - all good things come to those who wait...who persevere...who strive to better themselves...who listen...who contribute...who accept you for who you are...who take that leap of faith.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EMITTINGLOVE 7/10/2008 12:36PM

    I've been on here for over two years and would you believe that I have not made any connections or bonds with anyone. Tis' a shame. I am going to do betterstarting today. Thank you.

Comment edited on: 7/10/2008 12:34:53 PM

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BATHMOM 6/24/2008 11:24AM

    Nice entry! That has been my experience as well. Thanks for being such a great Spark friend!

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MERAINA 6/23/2008 11:38AM

    Great one! Awesome Blog!!!
"Well Done, is better than Well said." Ben Franklin
I just love "Do'er's! Saying it is one thing, but doing it is another! I just love Done girls Filled with ACTION!

Rock on!
Keep on Dancing,
Meraina

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TANSHAN1 6/23/2008 11:33AM

    So true! You really do have to participate to be noticed. Best of luck on your journey to health.
BTW: I put this on the DONE Girl blog roll...

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OAKBORN 6/23/2008 9:49AM

    Hi Anne!

I'm so glad you are my emoticon!

You have given me so much encouragement, I really appreciate it every minute!

We are here for each other!! emoticon

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SECRETO58 6/23/2008 8:39AM

    You are so right! emoticon

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Need to vent a little

Friday, June 20, 2008

I don't really B-blog, as I like to call it. And it seems that every Friday is when I want/need to do it...so I guess I am going to give into temptation today and just vent. And all I want to do is eat, so I might as well do some therapy blogging to try and circumvent the situation!

I give. All the time. Almost to a fault. I never say no. I never ask for things in return. It is just the way I am.

I've been watching my sister and sister in law's children every Mon & Fri for 6 months. Free of charge, of course. I even asked for my nephew to come on M&F because I never see him and it would save my sister daycare money. Long story there. Very sad too. It could be a book that would wrench your soul. But her life has taken a 180 and is really happy now, so there is a happy ending after all. My SIL, well another story there. Long and short of it is that she has never payed for daycare in her entire child rearing career. Someone (me or my MIL) is always there to say yes to her and since her work hours are weird b/c she is an after school early intervention person - my MIL is right in there to say yes. Thus, I never ask MIL to watch my kids b/c god forbid, she is always next door watching the other 2 golden grandchildren for her own daughter. Is there bitterness here? Hell yeah!

Let's just say - I have A LOT of payback to cash in this summer. But the chances of me cashing in are very slim. You see, DH and I are proud of the fact that we can do things on our own. We don't rely on others. It's almost to a fault. In fact, I'm trying to overcome that tendency of not asking for help. For example: My son's 4th birthday is on Sunday - well guess what? I asked everyone to bring some healthy side dish enough for 20 adults. And you know what? They all said yes. Makes it a lot more economical to entertain...and we are the entertaining family with the good entertaining house, of course!

Another thing is the tendency to rush back home because I feel, let's face it - guilt! Whenever I am alone - you name it, doing whatever - I feel the need to relieve whoever is watching the kids because that's MY job. Even when me and DH have that rare date, so sad, but once a year on our anniversary, we feel the need to rush home!! SICK! What the hell!?!!

So now it is the last Friday of the school year and I am almost free of my nephew...one more day on Mon for him AND my niece and then I get a deserved break from babysitting. Don't get me wrong - I love him as my own son, I call him #4 even and treat him as my own. That's why he loves me. But I need a break. My daydreams today are of me on a massage table for an hour & a half...then a facial and pedicure.

So now today is get ready for party day because tomorrow morning I work til 1pm and DH has the kids and is going to a 6 y.o. birthday party until 3pm. So tomorrow last minute prep is going to be just that. Clean. Bake. Weed. The whole kit & caboodle for a party. Oh and buy a gift for the little guy - I can't forget that. I probably will. Lol

So after a B-blog, it's time to count blessings, because God knows, other people have it way worse than I do. I'm thankful for the following:
- nice home
- healthy kids
- loving husband
- healthy family in general
- good climate (God help those in the flood zone)
- my new lifestyle change
- the fact that I can run & play with the kids w/o getting out of breath
- a good job that I love
- good people that I work with and the people we treat

I said to my co-worker the othe day that I took some selfish time to myself the other day and did 50 minutes on the TM while there were other things waiting to get done. Her immediate response was this - "you're the least selfish person I know - so don't you dare feel that way or say that" It's nice to hear that once in a while. Too bad the people you are not being selfish for and helping don't say thank you enough. That's why I always say thank you to everyone for the smallest things.

One thing about SP that I love - I always get a thank you for well, whatever, most of the time. And that is the nicest thing for me to get. Really.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IAMLION 6/21/2008 9:58PM

    Vent away any time you feel the need! I don't have any great advice on your family situation. I'm never very good at the whole advice thing. I apologize for that. emoticon

I would like to say Thank you for being my Spark friend! You are so nice, positive and so super supportive! You always put a big smile on my face and make me feel better!! You are a very giving person and in today's world, you are a rare find!

Hang in there my DONE friend!!
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SHAREDJOURNEY 6/20/2008 2:45PM

    Thank you so much for this blog. My last 2 blogs were vents and I was feeling guilty about it. You just unburdened me. We all need to feel that our contributions are apprciated. When you are giving to children the thanks for your contribution can take years to hear. You are doing something worthwhile and that in and of it self is a valuable contribution. Yes we all like the thanks of others and sometime they are insensitive but the gift still has value even if they don't show their appreciation. I am proud of you for being so giving and for meeting the needs of others so generously. The best compliments are the ones we give ourselves. Look in the mirror and tell that girl what a wonderful generous, kind and caring person she is. She needs to hear it and will appreciate the words from you more than from all the rest of us put together!
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OAKBORN 6/20/2008 11:39AM

    I understand! Vent away. Nobody here (least of all, me) is going to look at you askance.

But remember to value yourself and take care of yourself. You have many blessings and you should shower yourself with a few!

You are truly a lovely person and such a support to me.

Here's one of the many thank-yous I owe YOU!

emoticon emoticon

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Wedding dress fits 9 years later

Friday, June 13, 2008

So I got into the thing 3 years ago - short lived event...baby #3 came right after I zipped it up. LOL I wore it for Halloween, believe it or not! I truly was a sight walking around my Wisteria Place neighborhood in full bride gear! Bustier corset underneath & veil included! But it was a little snug, even then - hell, even when I got married 9 years ago!

So this time around, it was time to try it on again....and it fit! The funniest thing is that the shoulders are big! No joke! I was a little snug around the middle b/c I haven't workout in a week, but there was no corset on me this time. Teeheehee!

Believe it or not - 2 previous blogs were deleted because of distractions, I guess there were never meant to be seen! Finally, this is the blog I was supposed to write! At LAST!

NEW MINI GOAL - lose the last 5 pounds and make that dress swim on me by July 16, my 9th anniversary. Wear my wedding night trousseau again and have it look EXTRA good this time around - why not! I payed plenty for that stupid night gown set that I've worn only twice in the last 9 years! The last time I wore it - baby #3 came along...no chance of that happening now! LMAO! I feel giddy - this is what I'm supposed to do...

The other blogs before this were very yukky - b&@%$ blogs, I like to call them. I was feeling like I had no oomph or direction and feeling a little lost in my own skin, I guess. Who figured trying on a dress would turn my head around so fast.

FUTURE GOAL - My hubby doesn't know it yet, he thinks that I am joking, but it is going to happen. On our 10th anniversary, we are going to renew our vows in the back yard and have a big party - BBQ on the grill, and play a game of touch football. That's what he wanted to do 9 years ago, but in a park. My friend got his license to wed over the internet, so I'll have him officiate for us. This will happen - I can promise you that! Even if I have to surprise him - it will happen!! And I'm gonna look hot!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OAKBORN 6/13/2008 10:35PM

    Anni!!

Major emoticon, emoticon & emoticon!!!

That is a fabulous milestone!

I am really happy for you!

What a great way to renew your vows next year!

Go!

BTW, sometimes we need the ^%()^&^&#$$%^&%**&^ blogs to help us sort out what is important!

Comment edited on: 6/13/2008 10:33:56 PM

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LOBRENNAN 6/13/2008 6:24PM

    congratulations! my goal is to fit into my wedding dress, too. i've still got quite a ways to go before then. but when it does fit, i intend to wear it around the house for a week! or something...

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