Monday, September 15, 2014
It's been awhile.
The last months were extremely stressful. Due to some emotionally very challenging events, I couldn't eat for 2 weeks in April and lost 10 pounds. I then gained them back, got a stomach bug and lost 12 pounds. Gained them back, lost 5 again, gained them back and so on. It has been a real rollercoaster. By now, things have become a lot calmer.
I will have another 2.5 months of a very stressful lifestyle, as I will have a very difficult exam in late November. Until then, I'll just do my best to eat well, and get exercise whenever I can. But I'm not going to add additional stress to my body, or it will become too much.
Today I've discussed with my sister about my parents' weight. My parents have basically been dieting since forever and are just gaining and gaining. Last week when I visited them, my dad obviously again was heavier than before. They're both obese and very unhappy about it, but as my sister tells (she is currently staying with them), they eat loads of sweets every day, drink too much alcohol and have basically a bad lifestyle.
Every other week, my dad tells me about the new lifestyle change he wants to make (vegetarian! no dinner! no carbs! low fat!), which will again last for 3 days. I'm sick of hearing it. I've been listening to their diet plans since I've been 7 years old. I remember laying in their bed on Sunday morning and being told about the Hollywood diet or whatever diet was in season. I'm so sad they are ruining their health and about their unhappiness, and I wish I could do something about it. But they just cannot see what a normal healthy lifestyle is, and are forever in the circle of dieting and binging.
I really don't want to become like them in that point. They are both loving and good parents and spouses and are doing their best to do everything right in life. But I just don't want diets and food to take away my joy in life and my health. I don't want to be angry at them either, and struggle in making the conscious decision to emancipate myself from them completely in that point, but keeping the good relationship alive. Guess I have to work on that. But just had to get it out of my mind.
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
After my frustation about the weight gain I wrote in the last post about, I'm happy to tell there have been good changes again
First, I'm down 2 pounds this week already. I follow the principles of the Eat Clean Diet and do sports 3-4 times this week for an hour, mostly weight training. It feels good. I'm never hungry, my mood is pretty stable, and my skin is getting better (I have some acne).
The other thing I noticed today was that my sugar cravings have become minimal. Today I got what-every-woman-has-once-a-month. For many years, I always had severe pain for like 2 days, and I craved sugar like crazy and was only satisfied when I ate about 500kcal worth of sweets. I stopped at the supermarket on my way home today, and bought some chocolate I always loved and also consumed in huge amounts before my last exam. I ate two pieces, expecting the usual feeling of satisfaction, endorphins and not being able to stop before nothing was left. But, nothing happened! As a matter of fact, I didn't even like it, it felt much too sweet and I'm not feeling this has any good effect on my body. WOW, that is a change!!
I think I will throw the rest into the garbage and prepare some grilled chicken with avocado and whole-wheat bread.
I just had to share this, because for me (the former chocolate monster), this ist HUGE!!! I never thought this could happen.
Have a nice day everyone!
Saturday, February 16, 2013
at the moment, my body confuses me. I decided to write here whats happening, so maybe someone has an idea... Last week, I discovered the book "The Eat Clean Diet" by Tosca Reno, and it all sounded very good. So for the last 4 days, I ate according to her advice, which means completely unprocessed, homecooked food, more small meals etc. I logged everything here in the nutrition tracker to make sure my calories were ok, and ate everyday on the higher end of my range, about 1550 kcal a day. Additionally, I was very dedicated to my P90X again and did 1- 1,5 h of sports a day for the last three days. The result of my being such a brave girl? 1,3 kg gained!!
While the scale hates me obviously, I notice my body getting a little bit leaner, my stomach a little flatter (if this is the wrong expressions, excuse my English, couldnt find a better one) and my muscles a bit harder.
So, I'm telling myself that maybe my body is noticing now that there is REALLY something changing and tries to stay on that set point. I'm exactly at the weight I've been carrying around for 4 years now, and maybe my body just refuses to change and needs some time to adjust. I will not give up and just keep going like this, because there is physically just no way I eat and exercise like this and don't lose on the long term. I eat enough but not too much, just good fats, no crap, and exercise hard with a good mixture of cardio and strength training.
Has anyone had the same experience? I would be happy to read about it!
Thursday, February 07, 2013
Sooo, after the last year ended well, the new year didn't start so nicely.
The house I live in was on fire (thank God no one was hurt, and the part my apartment is in wasn't damaged at all), my Granny got sick and is now currently with my parents to get better again. Some more things happened, that I don't want to make public, but it was emotionally exhausting.
As a result, there was no progress in my healthy living project, I was just rushing everywhere, trying to help, thinking too much and besides, working like crazy. Last week, I had a sit-down with myself and made a reality check. I made some decisions:
This year, I will focus completely on staying healthy and getting the best results possible in my exam in November. If I do well, it will be the last exam of my life. The grades I will get will directly affect whether I can pursue the career I wish to. It will be a bit crazy however, as it consists of 11 single written exams, each 5 hours long. It is very demanding mentally, emotionally and also physically, so I want to be in the best shape to get it done as sucessfully as possible.
I decided to take a break from the dating life this year. Let's face it, I haven't been too successful in that field over the last 2 years. I had dates with about 10 different guys (by dates, I mean having coffee and talking, nothing more), and not one showed deeper interest in me. While I will have to figure out yet whether I'm doing something wrong, or whether it is about my look, or whether the guys were nuts and I just haven't found the right one yet, I just can't take no more at the moment. Every time it doesn't work out, I have to build up my confidence again, and I'm sad and distracted for some days. I'd rather focus on improving my life, than letting this pull me down again and again.
So, for the last 10 days, I just ate healthy, ENOUGH and especially enough carbohydrates (no egg white omelets for me anymore, thanks) and even in that shourt amount of time, the results are amazing: I lost 3.7 pounds (or 1.7 kg), my mood is very stable on a high level, I'm much happier and alert than before and have more strength. I exercise again, about 5 times a week for an hour (P90X) and eat a lot of the so-called super or power foods.
So, the start has been made, I'm going to stay on track and just keep doing it, because apparently it seems to work :)
Happy day to everyone!
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