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Out of Sorts aka

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Which are a lot of ways to say that I just haven't been feeling very "sparky" lately. I just haven't had any desire to log in, post in teams, or well... do anything here. I haven't exercised much either, but still a little bit. And today, I woke up feeling incredibly sore.

My fortune cookie a couple weeks ago revealed: "Knowing and not doing are the same as not knowing at all."

This spoke to me. It mean, it really hit something deep inside of me. Because I've always told myself, that I know how to do this... I know how to lose weight. I will do it eventually. But what good is knowing something if you never actually use that knowledge. So, this "fortune" has been coming back to me often. Now, I still didn't DO anything about it. But yet, I didn't forget it either, like I do with all of the other fortunes I get from those cookies. Ever have this nagging feeling that you're forgetting something, but you can't remember what? Well that fortune was like that for me. I just couldn't forget it, even though I hadn't decided to act on it yet.

Now, even though I hadn't yet acted on the "doing" part of the "knowing", I hadn't turned into a baked potato either. I've been moving, just not exercising. I've been going out of the house a lot, which requires lots of buses, and walking from stop to stop (like I said SOME exercise lol) But that has pretty much left me too exhausted to do much of anything else. And on the days I don't do anything, my body is still recovering from the day before.

For the most part, I've given up my crutches. Which means I'm walking more. Which means my feet hurt. Like really HURT. Let me tell you, when you haven't walked on your feet in 6 months, they forget that they actually have to hold you up for more that five seconds at a time. And suddenly 5 minutes seems like forever. A walk to the next bus stop is horrible. Nor for my injury mind you, just my feet in general. I mean, have you ever gone to a theme park and walked all day? Or have a job where you stand all day? Dont you go home afterward, your feet so sore, and sit down. And then at some point you have to stand up again. And that moment you stand up is the worst. Your feet still hurt just as bad as before, but this time, it's sudden. You know, you built up a tolerance for the pain all day, but once you sit down to rest, you lose that tolerance. So when you stand up, its like feeling the pain fresh, with no tolerance. That's how my feet feel every day now. Every minute, every day. And I just have to keep doing it to make my feet used to feeling weight again. It's getting better, but it's slow.

I'm really glad to be walking though. I have an ortho appt tomorrow, and I'm crossing my fingers that they will switch me to a shoe-thing-a-ma-jig, instead of the boot. I'm all about the progress lol.

Anyway, an opportunity presented itself to me today that I just couldn't turn down. A friend posted something on facebook today about getting up and moving, and I commented on it. Another friend of hers (who I didn't even know) commented as well, asking if my friend and I wanted to have a girls day and hit up aqua zumba at the gym. I seriously almost fainted. I mean... "AQUA ZUMBA?!" What was this fantastic sounding creature?! So, I checked the gyms website, and it's exactly what it sounds like. Zumba-like moves. IN. THE. POOL! What's not to love? It's a cardio class, that conveniently has water to hit my body's imperfections, hide when I mess up the choreography, AND I can totally do it with a bum leg! I was almost drooling!

BUT! I wasn't a member at the gym anymore, and I didn't have a ride. So I said, I'd love to, but I'd have to pass. And you know what? This girl, who I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW, offered me a ride, and let me go as her guest. Like, OMG! I'm always looking for new friends, so I'm like Heck yeah! She also wanted to go the Hydro Power Hour which was immediately before the aqua zumba, so we did that too. So, today, made a new friend, I walked a mile too and from bus stops, and did two hours in the pool at the gym! AH, awesomness is grand!

I just wish I could keep going! But sadly I can't. I went free today as her guest, but thats a one time deal. Otherwise, I'd have to pay $10 per visit. And since I'm not working and bringing in any dough.... well, I'm sure you see where I'm going with this. I definitely will go again, but probably infrequently. I want to go when I can do REAL zumba. Man, I miss zumba, something fierce!

Anyway, I've rambled enough. I think I'm going to bed and dying now. I'm not sure I want to feel the pain I know I will feel in the morning lol. But at least it will be exercise pain, and not the usual pain. G'night sparkies!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THATGIRL7 10/19/2011 9:16AM

    I think you are very courageous. Yeah, seriously! Starting to walk is just awesome! And even if you see some changes slowly, you will definitively see some difference very soon.

Sometimes we have trouble to find our Spark. The only important thing is that you still keep consistency in everything that you are doing.

And I'm pretty sure that in a few months, you'll be able to do Zumba!


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CEKER9 10/19/2011 1:02AM

    WOW! are you doing well... good for you!!!

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Want to Run (literally and figuratively)

Thursday, October 06, 2011

I am consumed with the feeling that I am stagnant. I want to bust free of the bindings holding me down and I want to run forward, to all that is new and better, to my future.

Now that I am walking, I want to run. I know it will be a long time, but wanting to run, encourages me to make sure I can walk well. Because walking well leads to running. I've never run before. Maybe a huffy jog, but that's it. I WANT TO RUN. To feel the wind flying past my face. I want to feel that freedom.

But I also want to run in ways that aren't at all physical. I want to run to my future, because running is faster than walking. Faster than crawling. I've been crawling since 2005 when I completed my AA. But I've had enough. So.... I applied at the college here. :) So, I should be starting in January in a B.A.S. program for Health Services Administration.

Here's to my future! emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LOSINGLINNDY 10/7/2011 12:25AM

    emoticon emoticon You are flying.

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    emoticon I'm so proud of you! And you'll be running in no time. Pick a program here, just like you picked a school program and stick with it! emoticon

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THATGIRL7 10/6/2011 2:31PM

    This is great when you know what you want to do (or who you want to be!)!

You can do it!

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IFDEEVARUNS2 10/6/2011 2:01PM

    You go, girl! And huffy jogging counts as running.... You'll run again, just don't rush it while you are healing.

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-CHERYL 10/6/2011 1:44PM

    Congratulations on deciding what you want and going for it! Its not as easy as it sounds, figuring what you want to do with your life.
I am a walker, in training for jogging :)
I had 2 strokes in 1999 that left me unable to walk. Many years later i am walking again, starting to walk fast long distances was so exciting. Now almost two years after starting Sparks and regular exercise through walking, I am starting to jog almost a mile at a time. Its great and I love it! Burns a lot more calories in less time then walking. But walking is a great exercise, no matter how fast you go!

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RENEEFL7 10/6/2011 1:26PM

    I like how you matched running to moving forward quickly in your life. I feel the same at times!

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A Little Taste of Fall

Tuesday, October 04, 2011

Oh how I love Fall! Favorite time of the year, hands down!

I was feeling very "fall" yesterday while grocery shopping, and decided that I wanted me a pretty fall centerpiece on my table... sooo....... this is what inspired me:

And for more cool weather inspiration, I also decided to try out a tea I haven't ever tried before, Black Currant and Vanilla Green Tea.

My breakfast:

Verdict? mmmmmMMMMMMMMmmmmm! Yummy!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LOSINGLINNDY 10/5/2011 12:19AM


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GGMFAY 10/4/2011 1:19PM

    Enjoy your good choices.


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Just a Tiny Update

Monday, October 03, 2011

Went to physical therapy today for the first time! Got some new exercises to do and was told to start weaning off the crutches completely! He also said that he doesn't see why I won't be really walking in the next month or so!

Just wanted to share the good news!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THATGIRL7 10/5/2011 10:21AM

    Woohoo! That are awesome news! I'm very happy for you! emoticon

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CVRONEK 10/4/2011 6:48AM

    emoticon Great news! You will have new freedom!

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LOSINGLINNDY 10/4/2011 2:25AM


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CASSIOEPIA 10/4/2011 12:34AM

    That is some good news. Congratulations :)

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MKPRINCESS007 10/3/2011 8:47PM

    Wonderful ! I am so happy for you! I am sure that just makes you feel like you are on top of the world. Keep on rockin it, girlfriend!!


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    Woo-hoo!!!! Go you! That's something to look forward to, for sure!!

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TUTUNAN 10/3/2011 4:12PM

    That is great news! Thanks for sharing. emoticon

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GGMFAY 10/3/2011 3:08PM


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This was a GOOD day!

Thursday, September 29, 2011

This was just a really super good day today! Even a headache isn't keeping me down!

First, I finally got all the financial issues straight with the hospital. Here's the low down: No health insurance + only 10k coverage from car insurance = hospital bill of $115K. Then you factor in that I no longer have a job (so I can't GET insurance), and I was in one pickle of a situation! My follow up dr visits were covered from the initial visit, but my physical therapy was not. So, I was told no therapy until I file, and get accepted, for the hospitals indigent care program.

I filed, but that was back in July... yes, that's right, JULY. Took a month to get the papers, two weeks to get to a fax machine (not having a car is a SERIOUS crime lol), and two weeks to get a verdict. Though, I know I could have rode the bus...but well, I didn't think about it, to be honest. But the good news, is I was told today that I was approved, and the bill written off. YUP, 100% gone. No bill. Which only makes me moderately happy, since well, it's $115K, it's not like I would actually be able to pay it off. I'm just happy I wont have to hear from creditors.

What makes me super happy is now I can make an appt for physical therapy! All I'm waiting for now is the Doc to rewrite the script for the therapy. My foot is essentially healed, I just have to work up the muscles to be strong enough not to turn my ankle, and basically learn to walk again. The plantar fascia that runs along the sole of the foot from the heel to the big toe (put your hand on the bottom of your foot and raise your toes upward and you'll feel it), is very tight, and sore, and I swear all my injured nerves have conspired against me and have all huddled up inside my big toe. So, I took my handy dandy tennis ball and massaged it all over. I already knew about this trick, but thanks to YOOVIE for reminding me (and enlightening me to all sorts of other body parts I can use it on)!

And this brings me to my next topic, I walked across my apartment today, completely unassisted! No chair, no walker, no crutches. Just my boot. Yay! I really can't remember the last time things in the fridge (or on the stove) weren't eye level! Makes me super happy.

And the last thing for today, is I rode the city bus for the first time ever. It's crazy and silly, I know. I've lived in the country most of my life (and so, didn't have a bus to ride), and when I did live in the city before, I always had a car. But today my fiance and I decided we wanted to get out of the house, and didn't feel like making lunch, so we took the bus to Sonic. It was pretty cool, to be out and about, and not rushed because we don't have to worry that the person who drove us is waiting. I will admit to being slightly bad at Sonic. I had the juiciest and tastiest cheeseburger I've had in a VERY long time, fries, and a limeade. Bad, bad, I know. BUT! The first thing I saw on the menu, was a Pumpkin Pie Shake (the image of which was the size of my head), complete with pie crust crumbles. My mouth watered so bad... but I sucked it up and went with my limeade. My fiance, however, did order the shake (despite the evil eye glare I gave him). I satisfied my desire for the shake with a teeny tiny taste of his shake, and whatdayaknow? I was perfectly fine after that! After the taste of it, I lost the craving and set about enjoying my own drink. That sounds like progress to me!

So yeah, this definitely qualified as a good day!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CEKER9 9/30/2011 12:28AM

    Glad to here things are getting better... a lot better. I trust you can get the physical therapy working for you soon and you will be back on your feet with much more confidence!!!

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CASSIOEPIA 9/29/2011 10:34PM

    WOW!!! Super good day, when the dr bill is just (poof) gone. What a relief. It lightened your load so much, you were able to walk unassisted.

LOVE this!

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