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The Silver Lining(s)

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

So this morning I weighed in; the scale was not good to me. I KNOW I did not eat an extra 2.5 pounds of food this week. Anyway, I was bummed. I mean, like *really* bummed. I tried so hard not to let it bother me, but it did. During my whole morning workout, I was pretty blah.
Came home, got ready for school, still feeling blah. I can't believe I let the scale dictate my morning like that! But this story has a happy ending, so this blog is not one giant pity party.

Today's events that gave this day/story a happy ending:

- One of the girls at school called me "skinny." Never in my LIFE have I been called "skinny." She said "I wish I was skinny like you!" (Floating on air at this point)
- One of my first grade girls said "I really like you." In all my teaching classes I learned "Don't worry if kids like you or not." But when a student tells you that, it's still a great feeling.
- Met a friend for coffee after school (this part has two happies) and he said "you look like you're losing weight." And I see him a lot, so this was really cool. The second happy is that even with my coffee and my pumpkin bread (it was SO good - didn't look up the calories until I got home - YIKES), I stayed within my range today. Wahoo!
- Went shopping after coffee; at my gym they have a Christmas tree with names of needy kids and what they want for the holidays. I picked up a name last week, and bought some super fun things for a little girl. Got her a sled, a winter coat, some really cute sparkly Hello Kitty shoes, and some fun clothes. The girl ringing me up told me "you're going to Heaven for this. She's going to be so excited. What a great thing you are doing." Made me want to cry.

So despite the scale telling me I gained 2.5 pounds, I had a pretty good day. I'm considering boycotting the scale for a while - I know what the other signs of success are; the scale has been taking up too much of my time. I don't need that stress. I LOVE going to the gym and working out. I think as long as I keep it up, I will see the results I want. For a fleeting moment today I thought "Why the hell do I bother with all these great workouts if I'm not losing any weight? I may as well stay home and sleep." But then I closed my eyes and remembered what I used to look like (see the "Whoa" picture on my Spark Page), and cranked up the resistance on my bike.
It's bed time. Tomorrow morning is swimming and a day off from strength training. Pilates is my evening class... looking forward to another super workout day.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEPPIESUSAN 12/3/2009 6:19PM

    I get like that too when the scale disappoints me, even though I tell myself not to let it get to me. But then, all those compiments you got hopefully made up for it!

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SOUTHGOINGZAX 12/3/2009 11:46AM

    Sometimes when I don't like what the scale says, I go back and weigh myself again 5 or 10 minutes later. Or before and after my workout. If it's a digital scale, sometimes they can just be *off*. Usually I weigh less the second time - so that's a little bit of a boost. Or you can measure other things, like your waist, hips, neck, thighs, etc. I like to see my arm measurements getting bigger (gotta have guns) and my hip measurement getting smaller - it means my butt is shrinking. So even though I struggle for every pound lost (come on! Just give it up, already, fat cells!), I try to remember that I am still getting stronger and healthier. And who knows - maybe that extra 2.5 pounds was from drinking too much water, or maybe you had a salty meal the night before, or maybe you had on a really thick pair of socks...I bet it will be back down next week.

Plus, how can it even matter when you had such a great week and did so much good in the world?

Comment edited on: 12/3/2009 11:47:13 AM

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HELLAVAHC 12/3/2009 6:41AM

    I'm in my own battle with the scale. I agree with you that it shouldn't dictate how you feel on a certain day... but I struggle with, "If I'm spending this much energy on making it move, and it doesn't move, what do I do?"

The answer, of course, is to feel my strong muscles and notice my tummy getting flatter. But I'm a numbers girl so... the struggle continues!

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TABBALOOSA 12/3/2009 6:21AM

    You look awesome and you feel good and healthy. What could be better than that? I remember when you joined SP just a few days after me. You've been amazing! And what a sweetheart you are - I love the things you picked out for the little girl.

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GONE2014 12/2/2009 10:56PM

    The scale can really fluctuate ... do NOT let it get you down ... skinny : )

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At least the workouts were consistent...

Monday, November 30, 2009

So today I am reflecting on the holiday weekend.

What I need to work on for when Christmas comes:
- Keep my wine intake in check. Just because it's there doesn't mean I have to drink it.
- Really evaluate dessert. Is it worth eating the whole piece of pie/brownie/cookie?
- Remember that hors d'oerves (sp) have calories, too. Especially cheese and crackers.

What went well and can easily continue through the season:
- Drinking lots of water! Took water everywhere with me so I kept hydrated.
- Eating slowly kept me from eating too much dinner.
- Eat the really good food and enjoy it. Homemade pumpkin roll is hard to beat.
- Keep everything in perspective. What seems like really horrible eating wasn't really *that* bad. In fact, at this time last year it most likely would have been even less than "normal" holiday eating
- Schedule workouts into the week, no matter how hectic it gets.
- Stay organized and on top of to-dos. Meaningful lists worked well for me this weekend.
- I didn't use this weekend as an excuse to eat too much. In fact, I probably was a little too hard on myself today when I went to lunch with a friend. We went for burgers - I was craving a burger and fries - and it's certainly not an everyday thing for me. There was probably a little too much guilt, especially because I didn't eat all my food, drank a ton of water with my lunch, and ate only a little bit of dessert. I must remember that this is for life, not for just this year.
- I stayed accountable and entered in most of my food. Must continue this through X-mas.

So all in all, it was a pretty good weekend. Weigh-in day is Wednesday and I suppose I must get on the scale. It is what it is, and I can't continue if I don't know the truth.
On a related note, I changed my nutrition tracker to reflect a 1 pound weight loss per week, even though I would be thrilled with 1/2 pound gone a week. This will keep my calories in check, I'm hoping.
Back to a normal schedule this week! Wahoo! Tomorrow morning I'm going to do a bit of swimming; I was going to run, but I think I'll swap my Tuesday and Thursday cardio this week to give my legs a little more of a break.

Last but certainly not least, I want to thank all my SparkFriends for their kind words on my blogs and page. I'm so glad I started getting more involved in leaving comments and writing on the boards - I think it really inspired me to give a good push for the end of the year. I am truly thankful for all the support and Spark Love.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REEDSKI 12/2/2009 5:49PM

    I kept up with my exercise, too. And the WW pumpkin mousse recipe helps me with dessert.

You sound like you are doing great and keeping on task.

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KATZABELLAMAMA 11/30/2009 11:25PM

    that some excellent perspectives going into the holiday season. I'm thankful that we don't have too much planned due to schedules to get to involved with the holiday over eating..

you've reminded me that I should re evaluate my nutrition tracker to reflect all my running.

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TABBALOOSA 11/30/2009 10:44PM

    Sounds like you did great. I love your commitment and follow-through. Enjoy that swim!

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KAYAKID 11/30/2009 8:45PM

    Carrie, You are doing awesome and the weekend was tough for me too but life goes on and as we get going towards christmas it will just take some good choices. I know we can do this together! I had a good workout today, I ran 2 miles and did my st. I am feeling good.

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KATISONIT 11/30/2009 8:31PM

    You're doing an amazing job! And I'd *kill* for a little consistency in my workouts at the moment...

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"To Do" or "To Do Later"?

Saturday, November 28, 2009

One of my more recent goals was to stop writing such long to-do lists and just *do* what would have been on that list. When I actively blogged about it and thought about it, I did just fine. No lists, no "I'll do it tomorrow"... it just got DONE. Today I found myself falling back into old habits... "I'll put the new sticker on my car tomorrow when it's a little warmer." "I'll vacuum tomorrow after the gym." "I'll make the rice pudding tomorrow afternoon." ARGH. Today I recognized this, and today I DID all those things without another thought. Little things that have been on my list for what seems like weeks got done today because I sucked it up and did it. My mom and I use the saying "Suck it up and do it." That phrase has gotten me through a lot!
So I officially feel like a runner. I put my "Runner Girl" sticker on my car; I bought it after my first 5K but it's been sitting here gathering dust. Today I put it on the back window. Wahoo!
Wrapped some X-mas presents, ordered some pictures that I've been meaning to order since I got back from China in July (!), vacuumed... it was a productive day. And I even got to make some amazing rice pudding. (Which only has about 200 calories in a serving. Are the calories worth it? YES, indeed. The pudding is SO good.)
I am working on next week's fitness and nutrition goals. It's been really good for me to map out my fitness plan for the week so I can get an idea of what i can eat. I underestimate on purpose; last week I missed a day because I was sick but I was still on track with the extra running I did on my other days.
Time for some more water and some planning.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HELLAVAHC 11/29/2009 5:21PM

    Thanks so much for my goodie massage! I got my to do list done and feel better. Hope you have a great week at school!

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MONGO2TEN 11/29/2009 4:51AM

    I'm a list person. I love crossing out things as I do them. Good job on the running:)


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TABBALOOSA 11/28/2009 8:29PM

    Woohoo, runner girl. Pretty cool to be eligible for that sticker.

I relish my lists - mostly the checking off part. Sometimes I go back and add things I did that weren't on the list just so I can enjoy the satisfaction of checking them off.

Love all that energy you have.

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GOALIEGRANDMA3 11/28/2009 7:09PM

    You have a plan that works for you. that is great.

I personally have to have a list. I love a list and checking off things as I do them.

I even have a place on my list than says; other things not include on this list, and I add them as I do them.

I want to someday be a runner girl too. congratulations.

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LUGNUT_9754 11/28/2009 6:39PM

    Your blog just motivated me to work out! I've been debating with myself all day about it, but now I will just DO, no more thinking! Thanks! emoticon

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2 out of 3 ain't bad...

Friday, November 27, 2009

Just re-read my last blog about how I was going to stay in control over Thanksgiving.
1) Eat slowly - check
2) Drink a ton of water - check
3) Not too much wine - um, not so much

My dad and his wife visit the Finger Lakes often and bring back some really good wine. Yesterday we polished off some Gewurtztraminer with the turkey and some ice wine with dessert. I'm going to be bad and justify it, though. I have not had wine in about 2 weeks (!!!) so yesterday's wine tasted EXTRA good. I really enjoyed it. So there is my excuse.
Wearing the skinny jeans helped - I didn't have seconds of anything, and I didn't let myself get too full. I was definitely full, but I didn't feel sick. Small victories count!
So today it's lots and lots and lots of water, some running, ST and maybe some elliptical this morning (depending on how I feel), and some cleaning this afternoon. Back to normal eating.
I felt very lucky yesterday - I have a lot for which to be thankful. I have a wonderful family and a wonderful honey. I am very loved.
Happy Black Friday - I don't do shopping today; tried it once, and once was more than enough for me.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NEWMOMOVER40 11/27/2009 9:19PM

    Sounds like a fun night. Pat yourself on the back for making good on most of the promises you made yourself - indeed, two out of three ain't bad, especially on Thanksgiving.

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TABBALOOSA 11/27/2009 7:49PM

    Way to go!

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FITGIRL15 11/27/2009 4:19PM

    "Gewurtztraminer"??? OMG... that used to be my FAVORITE WINE! (I still have a bottle chilling in my fridge... might have to crack it for the holidays, thanks for the reminder!

Sounds like you are having a wonderful holiday! ENJOY IT!

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CFMOSS 11/27/2009 2:50PM

    Sounds like you done good! Keep up the good work - I had one glass of pinot noir and a delicious glass of port alongside a small slice of Maytag blue cheese. - Decadence.

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SOUTHGOINGZAX 11/27/2009 12:27PM

    Good job! I didn't meet any of those goals...ha ha. But I was at the gym this morning, it felt good to start burning off those calories (especially the margarita and the cherry cheesecake calories). Ah well - it was one day of indulgence - and I didn't take any leftovers home, so I won't be tempted to continue to overeat.

Shopping online is way easier.

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SEPPIESUSAN 11/27/2009 11:27AM

    If you had to pick one of those three goals to not meet, I think you picked the right one. ;) Yay wine. Good job, I say!!

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HELLAVAHC 11/27/2009 10:53AM

    Wearing skinny jeans was a great idea. It made me very aware of how full I was!

Happy Day After!

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PINKCOCONUT 11/27/2009 7:47AM

    Glad you had a fabulous Thanksgiving and kudos on the wine! LOL It really does taste better with a small break in between, eh? That reminds me to pick some up for tomorrow night!!!

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Recovery Day

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Yesterday I came home from school feeling crappy. I called in for a sub today and spent the day on the couch and not doing much of anything. Tonight I am feeling rested and ready for tomorrow. Then, Turkey Day! My fiance is going to make bread to take to my dad's house; dad is making the dinner - traditional turkey, stuffing, and some awesome pumpkin roll (I hope!). Already thinking about how I'm going to stay in control... eat slowly, drink a ton of water, and not too much wine. Also, no stretch pants - I need to feel my tum getting bigger so I don't eat so much.
Tomorrow I'm going to do some extra working out to get the metabolism going - a little TM running and a spin class in the morning, and maybe some weights at home later in the evening. WATER WATER WATER.

So I sent in my money today to sing in NYC at Carnegie Hall. In February a choir I'm in is singing Carmina Burana. ("O Fortuna" is the opening and closing of the work - a song with which just about everyone is familiar.) Decided that it was worth it to do - I'm lucky I'm able to afford the money and the time to sing right now. Thanks to all who helped me make my decision.

Tomorrow afternoon is a haircut - LOVE getting my hair cut. There is a girl there who gives the most amazing shampoos/head massages. Makes it worth the ridiculous amount I pay the salon.
It's time for a glass of water and a warm bath...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NEWMOMOVER40 11/27/2009 9:16PM

    How fun to get to sing Carmina Burana - at Carnegie Hall no less! That is a real treat -- not that I know from personal experience of course -- anyway, I'm sure you'll remember it the rest of your life.
You're doing great!

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FITGIRL15 11/26/2009 8:27AM

    Reading this post made me laugh... especially this part : "no stretch pants " LOL So true!!!

Have a wonderful holiday and weekend! XOX You are making such good decisions!

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