Tuesday, February 09, 2010
I don't know what came over me today. A parent brought in a tray of cookies and I just couldn't help but eat WAY too many of them. It was a little ridiculous. I have to take out my braces to eat, and usually I think "it's not worth it to take them out" but this morning, apparently it was. I just couldn't stop eating them. Finally I had to say to myself "this is enough! You are better than this." But not before I ate a whole meal's worth of calories in mediocre cookies.
Then tonight. Ugh. I went to the store to buy some Tapatio and chocolate squares for my honey, and the chip aisle just called to me. I couldn't resist it. I bought the smaller bag of chips, and about 5 minutes ago, as I checked my Spark stuff, I practically inhaled the bag of chips. ARRRRRRRRGGGGHHHHH
Today was a pretty big failure for me, eating-wise. I don't know the last time I felt so out of control... I couldn't even take a minute to think before I put food in my mouth. My stomach is SO not happy right now and I'm disappointed that I did what I did.
But we hop back on the horse. So despite my total calorie overload today, I am going to list positives.
I drank a lot of water, including hot tea. It's really helping me get over my cold.
Didn't stop at the state store for wine. It's supposed to snow a lot here tonight, and that usually means a night of wine for me. But I *did* think about this - I knew I ate crazy cookies and I knew I was in for a bag of chips so I thought "good lord I don't need any MORE empty calories." For what *that's* worth.
I am getting back on track RIGHT NOW by making a bowl of oatmeal for dinner and drinking a very large glass of water as I type this.
After my dinner I am going to plan the rest of my week as best I can. A lack of planning this weekend into the beginning of this week has set me up for failure. As long as I work on planning, I can really get back on track.
When I went in to see my doctor yesterday, he said "holy cow you've lost a lot of weight." Wahoo!
I went to yoga tonight and it was good.
Off to put my hot cereal together... I'm thinking a diced apple, a little brown sugar and some cinnamon. And then off to plan for the week!
Tuesday, February 09, 2010
Woke up yesterday to a nasty sore throat and my right nostril and eye running like faucets. Of course my *left* side was all stopped up. Bleh. Went to the doc to rule out strep throat (I am going to sing this weekend in NYC and I CAN NOT be sick. I paid a lot of $$$ and they don't give refunds!) and got some heavy duty decongestant and cough meds. I guess it's working because the faucet eye is just about gone.
Haven't worked out since Friday... did circuit training at the chiro on Friday (they have a tough new core routine), skipped the gym on Saturday because of snow, wasn't feeling good on Sunday, and was sick yesterday. I am determined to get to my yoga class tonight, but it's all going to depend on what this snow storm decides to do. The class is from 5:15-6:00 - I'm keeping an eye on the radar today.
Bought tickets for the Tim Burton exhibit at MoMA - we are going on Friday afternoon after rehearsal. I'm REALLY looking forward to the city... I love going into New York. I have a little money I'm taking along for some shopping. I *still* can't believe how much I love shopping! I don't spend a ton of money, but I can finally enjoy trying stuff on. Wahoo! There are two cute shirts at Anthropologie that I have my eyes on... there is a store close to the hotel in NYC so I might pop over on Thursday when I get to the city. I'm a little bummed that I can't run - won't be able to do a Central Park run, but we'll be doing a lot of walking. My favorite part of the city is being able to walk everywhere.
I have been craving brownies for DAYS and I finally decided to do something about it yesterday. Found a great recipe and adjusted the amounts for the two squares of chocolate that we had. Ended up being just what I needed - put the brownies in three little dishes to bake. One plain, one walnut, and one peanut butter. Honey and I ate all of them yesterday. Lucky for us, I didn't make a whole batch and they were not very thick. Didn't enter it into the nutrition tracker, but I have a feeling that they weren't *horribly* bad. Anyway, they were super delish and it took care of my brownie craving.
Sunday, February 07, 2010
This football season was different for me than previous ones. I used to love parking myself on the couch on a Sunday to watch football. This season, I couldn't sit still long enough to enjoy more than one quarter at a time. Is it my new Sparky life? I always felt like I should be *doing* something - laundry, planning out my week's food, vacuuming...
I know it's important to take time to relax, and I do take time to relax, but it's more fulfilling because the relaxing time is more of a treat now. (That might not have made any sense, but it made sense in my head.)
So this morning I woke up and kind of forgot that it was Super Bowl Sunday. We aren't going to a party, we're not planning on staying awake until all hours of the night, but honey did joke that he was going to check out the Wal-Mart website to see how many bags of Doritos we should stock up on for tonight.
I posted an ad on Craigslist for a mattress set - free, as long as they came and picked it up. I got a lot of replies! One of them told me he'd come this morning; it turned into "maybe this morning" and then "I don't know when I'm going to get there." I replied to a different e-mail, one who left her phone number and didn't have grammatical errors.
I really like the idea of someone being able to use my old stuff so I don't have to throw it away, but I got just a little bit of a weird feeling from a few replies.
So anyway, the girl I called is coming by tonight to pick up the set. It's already downstairs, blocking one of the entrances to the kitchen, so I am really hoping that she actually comes to get it! At this point, I am just tired of looking at it.
Honey and I went grocery shopping today, stocked up on some good veg. We're having spaghetti squash with homemade marinara tonight and a good strip steak. Yum! He has been so amazingly supportive of me on this Spark Journey... he is constantly telling me how proud he is of me and how good I'm looking. We both never imagined that this is the kind of couple we'd be after almost six years together!
I'm off to get my cup of tea... My nose is a little stuffy today and I'm desperately trying to keep a bad sickness away for the weekend when I go sing in NYC. I've already paid to go and I can't get a refund... a few years ago I was supposed to go sing and I came down with the flu, so I'm going to be guzzling the tea this week.
Friday, February 05, 2010
I LOVE my Pilates classes. There was a time when I used to look at women who took Pilates with that kind of look that was like "Oh, *those* kind of women do Pilates... ridiculous." "Those" kind of women were fit and happy. I was not one of "those" women.
But now, here I am taking Pilates classes, yoga classes... all of the classes that "those" women take. And you know what? I think am one of "those" kind of women. That woman who goes to the gym because she likes it - a lot. The woman who actually *enjoys* putting on workout clothes instead of a baggy t-shirt and sweatpants. The woman who looks in the mirror in the Pilates studio and thinks "wow, today I see a muscle" or, "my form is good tonight" instead of "wow, you can really see my gut in this shirt." I used to look at "those" women with a mix of jealousy and disdain. "Geez, look at her in that shirt... it's so small." "Must be nice to spend all day at the gym." I saw one of "those" women last night and thought "wow, her back muscles are amazing. She must work out really smart!"
I used to look at "those" women go into J.Crew and try on pants - they slipped on with no problem. I was lucky if I could buy a t-shirt there. "Oh, look at "those" women trying on that stuff. Pshaw." J. Crew is now one of my favorite places to shop and I'm working on a size 4 there. I'm one of "those" women who is not embarrassed to ask the sales person for my size in something.
So I guess that I am really one of "those" women now. I love the gym, and I don't remember EVER loving clothes shopping the way I do now.
I still get the feeling of "I wonder if everyone is looking at me - the fat girl in the room," but it's slowly getting to be less frequent.
And with that, this one of "those" women is going to the pool to get some laps in.
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