Saturday, May 08, 2010
and already I'm re-thinking my May goals. One of my goals is (was?) to fit into a skirt that I bought. I bought the skirt back in March and I'm still not in it (bleh). So my skirt has been hanging up in my closet, motivating (taunting?) me. Even though I've discovered a love for biking and I'm running outside more, not fitting into this skirt has really been bugging me. For all the good things I've done, not fitting into this skirt has been killing me.
I read a few Spark articles about goal-setting, and the latest one I read (again) was about keeping "skinny jeans" and why it hurt more than helped. I really think that having this skirt around is not good for me. Every day I am reminded that I'm still not exactly where I want to be, and I get frustrated. I know I set the goal for the *end* of May, and it's only the beginning... maybe I'll hide the skirt until the end of the month so it's not staring me in the face every morning. Maybe I'll keep the goal but add some more fitness goals to it and focus on those instead.
I wrote a note in my lunch bag yesterday - "GOALS! Fit in that skirt!" and it kept me from eating all the sweets on the faculty room table. I'm so close. Part of me feels as if I quit now, I'm failing.
Maybe this is just the kick in the pants (or the skirt, if you will) I need to lose these last few pounds. I've been just kind of going through the motions, not really focusing on my goals. It's been so easy to be lax about my eating - I was so disciplined at the start of my Spark journey. I haven't been challenged lately. I don't just want to settle for where I am now - I *know* that I can do more. Am I afraid? I don't know.
I see all these Spark Friends having such great weight loss, and I feel as if I'm left in the dust. But I see what you've been eating and doing - no wonder the weight is coming off! Do I deserve a huge breakfast of pancakes and bacon because I ran three miles? No, not really. Although I burn calories running, I don't think it makes up for the calories in that kind of breakfast. Lattes and chai have calories - LOTS of calories. Just because I "forget" to track those drinks doesn't mean the calories disappear.
So today after my run, I am going to look at doing some kind of nutrition challenge. Perhaps a challenge as part of a team. I have been accountable to lots of people regarding my workouts, but never my nutrition. Maybe that's just what I need to get the ball rolling again.
Today I am going to start with small steps.
- At breakfast, stick with water. I already had my coffee and I don't need extra calories from orange juice. Also, consider some eggs with veggies instead of pancakes. Goooooo protein!
- Eat lots of fruit and veggies today. There is a lot of lettuce in the fridge that needs to be eaten, and it would be a good kick-start for my challenge.
- Find a nutrition challenge that would help me live a healthier lifestyle and help me lose some more pounds.
- Track food as I eat it instead of waiting until the end of the evening when I conveniently "forget" how much I actually ate.
Thanks for reading my rambling blog. I had to get out some frustrations and some thoughts. Your support is greatly appreciated - I couldn't do this without you!
Friday, May 07, 2010
Since I started doing more of my workouts outside, the weeks have been going by much more quickly. I don't know if it's the promise of a beautiful trail or what, but I love how my work days are just starting to fly by.
Last night my buddy and I went to the gorge trail to do some biking. Again, a perfect evening for being outside. Sunny, not humid at all, a little breezy... SO nice. We stopped to look at some waterfalls and watch the river. It stormed here recently, so the water was really rushing. I love nature!
Today is "Sweet Treat" Day from the PTA for Teacher Appreciation Week. I am a little nervous... I had such trouble avoiding the M&Ms this week. I think another note in my lunch with my goals on it is in store. My pants are fitting a bit better today, and I would like them to keep fitting. And I have an expensive skirt hanging in my closet that I am determined to fit into perfectly at the end of May.
Did I do my to-dos?
Water - YES. But it was all at the beginning of the day; today I'm going to work on getting some more water in the afternoon and evening.
Pack lunch - no, but I did it this morning. I got home late from biking so I ate my dinner and crashed on the couch. Biking outside is very tiring!
Light dinner - YES. I had some spaghetti with homemade marinara, and a piece of honey bread for something sweet. Lentil and bulgur salad while my spaghetti was cooking. *note to self - eat something after school before biking so I don't get ravenous when I come home.
Today I will:
Drink a ton of water throughout the day.
Keep my goals in mind as I eat lunch and dinner.
Get the downstairs looking presentable.
Have a wonderful Friday!
Thursday, May 06, 2010
It's official. I love the month of May.
Yesterday was sunny, a little breezy, and just beautiful. I planned on going to the gym after school, but my running buddy asked if I wanted to go to a local Rails to Trails trail after school. wahoo! So we got in an hour of some super outdoor running. I haven't set foot in the gym since last Friday. This weather is just too gorgeous to stay inside, though!
This afternoon we're planning on going to the gorge trail to do some biking. Yippee!
Last night my running buddy told me that I really inspired her and motivated her to keep running. I know she gets frustrated because she is not a fast runner, and I keep telling her that it doesn't matter; the important thing is that she's out there doing it. I lent her my book The Courage to Start - it really helped me get past my frustration of being slow. I am so totally flattered that she looks at me as an inspiration. A little more than a year ago, I couldn't even run for 5 minutes. And to tell you the truth, her telling me that I'm motivating her keeps *me* going, too.
Water - YES!
No biscotti - YES!
Low-fat latte - no. I got a smoothie instead; I was in the mood for something cold. It was delish.
TM run and ST - No, but running outside was SO much better. And the run was about 1 hour long.
Eat consciously - um, I think I did. I didn't go back for seconds of the meatballs, but I had a bit of sweet treat.
Today I will:
Drink a ton of water (I like to keep this on my list so I remember to do it)
Pack my lunch for tomorrow
Eat a light dinner to balance out yesterday
Wednesday, May 05, 2010
Yesterday I was determined to not eat a piece of cake from the faculty room. I had one small piece on Monday, and it was good. But I didn't want to eat that second piece. I stayed away. It looked so nasty sitting there yesterday - everyone had torn into it to get the moist inside pieces, so it looked as if a crazed animal had gotten at it. Gross.
There *were* some M&Ms, though, and I couldn't resist. I didn't go back for more, though. Small steps.
Today, the PTA is providing us with lunch. I thought about taking a salad along with me, but I don't want to appear ungrateful. So I think I'll eat what they have, and for dinner tonight, I'll eat what my lunch would have been on a normal day - salad, little bit of pasta, and yogurt.
I'm in the mood for some fresh flowers, so I think I'll stop and get some before school for me and some for two good buddies at school. I am not reading my enlightenment book anymore; it got a little too weird for me. I was helped, however, by the "focus" section of the book. So it gave me what I needed. My latest read is a book about how giving to others can make us happier. So far it's pretty interesting.
Water - YES!
Bike rack prices - YES! The one I really want is not getting released until June or July. The original date was May 4th, and I was all ready to buy it, but now the date is pushed back. Not sure if I should just be patient or if I should just look for a different one. I think I know what I'm going to do...
Padded gloves - YES! They are cute and purple. But even more important, they have SUPER gel padding.
Clean up the kitchen - YES! Oi, what a mess it was!
Calcium - YES! Fish oil - NO! I think I'll stop in at the natural food store today to look for this. Target only had two kinds, and I wasn't thrilled with either of them. The search continues.
Today I will:
Drink a ton of water
Not eat biscotti when I go for coffee after school
Stick with a low-fat latte after school (I think all the chocolate chai has been contributing to my slow/non-weight-loss.)
Do a 15-20 minute TM run with some intervals; strength train
Eat consciously at lunch today. Really think about the food I eat - is it worth it?
I am loving this new experiment - getting up without the alarm. I woke up at 5:30 today to the birds chirping. I wasn't tired at all!
Tuesday, May 04, 2010
So after not even being able to stand up on Sunday morning after my crazy ride (literally I could not stand up. I had to sit down in the shower because my quads hurt so bad - even though I stretched and iced like a fiend), I went running last night with the ladies. My legs felt like lead, but I went. My run up the hill was more like a shuffle, but I went. It was a beautiful night - a little breeze, warm sun, and the humidity had gone away. Today I am taking another rest day (I just took one on Sunday) - my grip is weak because of my biking (it's getting better, though, so I'm not as worried) so I don't want to do any weight training. The only thing I might do tonight is go for a little swim. We'll see.
Today was the first day of my new experiment. I set the alarm for 6:30, the latest I could get up and still get ready in time, and woke up to the sun and the birds at 6:00. Definitely a more pleasant way to get up than the alarm. I'll try it again tomorrow.
It's teacher appreciation week at school - yesterday morning the PTA brought us some breakfast. I forgot they were doing this, so I ate at home. But it looked so good - I had 1/2 a bagel with cream cheese and smoked salmon (I justify this by telling you we don't get this at home - it was SO good), and a piece of homemade banana bread (I LOVE good homemade bread, and I have to support the PTA). The administration also sent in a gigantic chocolate cake with buttercream icing. It is SOOO good - very moist and yummy. So I had a little piece with lunch. I was very excited because normally I go back for a 2nd, even bigger, piece. But not yesterday. I stuck with one piece and totally enjoyed it. There will be leftovers today, but I am determined to stay away. It's never as good the 2nd day, anyway. I think I'll pack a little note in my lunch - "Don't eat the cake! You want to fit in that skirt!"
Water - YES!!!
Clean up dishes - as best i could. Honey cooked dinner last night, and he leaves a LOT of dishes. I will take tonight to clean up the kitchen.
Pack lunch - didn't do this last night. Again, honey in the kitchen = no other space to pack lunch. I packed my lunch this morning.
Enjoy my run - YES!!!! It was SO nice. I wasn't very social (sometimes I just like to take the time to think) but I enjoyed it anyway.
Today I will:
Drink a ton of water
Call around to get prices for a bike rack - maybe go buy one?
Buy padded gloves for my biking
Clean up the kitchen
Pick up some calcium and fish oil supplements
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