CARILOUIE   78,050
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It's only May 8th...

Saturday, May 08, 2010

and already I'm re-thinking my May goals. One of my goals is (was?) to fit into a skirt that I bought. I bought the skirt back in March and I'm still not in it (bleh). So my skirt has been hanging up in my closet, motivating (taunting?) me. Even though I've discovered a love for biking and I'm running outside more, not fitting into this skirt has really been bugging me. For all the good things I've done, not fitting into this skirt has been killing me.

I read a few Spark articles about goal-setting, and the latest one I read (again) was about keeping "skinny jeans" and why it hurt more than helped. I really think that having this skirt around is not good for me. Every day I am reminded that I'm still not exactly where I want to be, and I get frustrated. I know I set the goal for the *end* of May, and it's only the beginning... maybe I'll hide the skirt until the end of the month so it's not staring me in the face every morning. Maybe I'll keep the goal but add some more fitness goals to it and focus on those instead.

I wrote a note in my lunch bag yesterday - "GOALS! Fit in that skirt!" and it kept me from eating all the sweets on the faculty room table. I'm so close. Part of me feels as if I quit now, I'm failing.

Maybe this is just the kick in the pants (or the skirt, if you will) I need to lose these last few pounds. I've been just kind of going through the motions, not really focusing on my goals. It's been so easy to be lax about my eating - I was so disciplined at the start of my Spark journey. I haven't been challenged lately. I don't just want to settle for where I am now - I *know* that I can do more. Am I afraid? I don't know.

I see all these Spark Friends having such great weight loss, and I feel as if I'm left in the dust. But I see what you've been eating and doing - no wonder the weight is coming off! Do I deserve a huge breakfast of pancakes and bacon because I ran three miles? No, not really. Although I burn calories running, I don't think it makes up for the calories in that kind of breakfast. Lattes and chai have calories - LOTS of calories. Just because I "forget" to track those drinks doesn't mean the calories disappear.

So today after my run, I am going to look at doing some kind of nutrition challenge. Perhaps a challenge as part of a team. I have been accountable to lots of people regarding my workouts, but never my nutrition. Maybe that's just what I need to get the ball rolling again.

Today I am going to start with small steps.
- At breakfast, stick with water. I already had my coffee and I don't need extra calories from orange juice. Also, consider some eggs with veggies instead of pancakes. Goooooo protein!
- Eat lots of fruit and veggies today. There is a lot of lettuce in the fridge that needs to be eaten, and it would be a good kick-start for my challenge.
- Find a nutrition challenge that would help me live a healthier lifestyle and help me lose some more pounds.
- Track food as I eat it instead of waiting until the end of the evening when I conveniently "forget" how much I actually ate.

Thanks for reading my rambling blog. I had to get out some frustrations and some thoughts. Your support is greatly appreciated - I couldn't do this without you!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SPARKLINGDAWN 5/9/2010 2:21AM

    Wise words, and good points to consider.

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CAMROLA 5/8/2010 11:39AM

    You're not rambling, and I'm SO glad you brought back the taunting skirt. You are taking great care of yourself, becoming more active, getting stronger, and no skirt can measure the impact of that! The pounds will come when they're ready. Just know you're building up a fabulous machine that will thank you for all your hard work--regardless of what you're wearing and what number is on the tag.

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GSDMIKE 5/8/2010 10:42AM

    When I start struggling with making my calorie range, sometimes I switch to "planning" mode instead of tracking mode. I fill in the next day's plan in the tracker the night before, so it becomes a nutrition plan, kind of like my running plan. Then I just have to eat it. I'll allow myself substitutions during the day, but generally my substitutions tend to be close to equivalent choices.

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KATZZABELLA 5/8/2010 10:34AM

    A nutrition challenge would be awesome to join, then you/ I would think twice about the junk food. Let me know if you find one I may join with you.

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RUBYCLAIRE 5/8/2010 7:37AM

    I like your new approach. It sounds like a winner to me. I seem to have similar difficulty when it comes to tracking ANYTHING.
I know YOU CAN DO IT!

Whenever I get the urge lately to eat foods I shouldn't, I remind myself how far I've already come and then think, do I want to start a backwards spiral.

Good Luck!


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CFMOSS 5/8/2010 7:07AM

    I suggest putting "be kind to myself" on that list of goals. You are doing such a great job. Understand the impatience as well as the accidentally not tracked items. those lattes do have calories especially the really yummy flavored ones; you've been doing such a good job that a reward is okay (that is to say one latte or...occasionally...not two every day) anyway, remember to see how far you have come; take a deep breath and finish your journey in whatever time it takes skirt or no skirt. Hugs and a great day to you.

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ROX525 5/8/2010 6:51AM

    You sound like me. I am so close but found the need to eat things I shouldn't have all week. I exercised extra to kill the calories and maintained instead of losing. Looking at the calendar, we have 3 weeks and 3 days till May 31 or 24 days for you to fit in the skirt. Wishing both of us success! Have a great weekend.

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JILLIANPRNCSS 5/8/2010 6:49AM

    Good to try new things and shake up your routine. I hope things work for you.

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JAMIE_LYNN42 5/8/2010 6:32AM

    I started to make breakfast the most important meal of the day. Eating higher calories then, tapering off through the day. works for me.

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Hooray, hooray, it's Friday!

Friday, May 07, 2010

Since I started doing more of my workouts outside, the weeks have been going by much more quickly. I don't know if it's the promise of a beautiful trail or what, but I love how my work days are just starting to fly by.

Last night my buddy and I went to the gorge trail to do some biking. Again, a perfect evening for being outside. Sunny, not humid at all, a little breezy... SO nice. We stopped to look at some waterfalls and watch the river. It stormed here recently, so the water was really rushing. I love nature!

Today is "Sweet Treat" Day from the PTA for Teacher Appreciation Week. I am a little nervous... I had such trouble avoiding the M&Ms this week. I think another note in my lunch with my goals on it is in store. My pants are fitting a bit better today, and I would like them to keep fitting. And I have an expensive skirt hanging in my closet that I am determined to fit into perfectly at the end of May.

Did I do my to-dos?
Water - YES. But it was all at the beginning of the day; today I'm going to work on getting some more water in the afternoon and evening.
Pack lunch - no, but I did it this morning. I got home late from biking so I ate my dinner and crashed on the couch. Biking outside is very tiring!
Light dinner - YES. I had some spaghetti with homemade marinara, and a piece of honey bread for something sweet. Lentil and bulgur salad while my spaghetti was cooking. *note to self - eat something after school before biking so I don't get ravenous when I come home.

Today I will:
Drink a ton of water throughout the day.
Keep my goals in mind as I eat lunch and dinner.
Get the downstairs looking presentable.

Have a wonderful Friday!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GSDMIKE 5/7/2010 9:44AM

    Have a great weekend.

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CAMROLA 5/7/2010 9:23AM

    Happy Friday, Friday, Friday--woo hoo! I agree on the outdoor workouts. I so look forward to my outdoor runs and being in the park and just getting some vitamin D.

Have a GREAT weekend!

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CFMOSS 5/7/2010 7:32AM

    You are doing such a great job. Keep up the good work.

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OMG sun!

Thursday, May 06, 2010

It's official. I love the month of May.
Yesterday was sunny, a little breezy, and just beautiful. I planned on going to the gym after school, but my running buddy asked if I wanted to go to a local Rails to Trails trail after school. wahoo! So we got in an hour of some super outdoor running. I haven't set foot in the gym since last Friday. This weather is just too gorgeous to stay inside, though!

This afternoon we're planning on going to the gorge trail to do some biking. Yippee!

Last night my running buddy told me that I really inspired her and motivated her to keep running. I know she gets frustrated because she is not a fast runner, and I keep telling her that it doesn't matter; the important thing is that she's out there doing it. I lent her my book The Courage to Start - it really helped me get past my frustration of being slow. I am so totally flattered that she looks at me as an inspiration. A little more than a year ago, I couldn't even run for 5 minutes. And to tell you the truth, her telling me that I'm motivating her keeps *me* going, too.

Yesterday's to-dos:
Water - YES!
No biscotti - YES!
Low-fat latte - no. I got a smoothie instead; I was in the mood for something cold. It was delish.
TM run and ST - No, but running outside was SO much better. And the run was about 1 hour long.
Eat consciously - um, I think I did. I didn't go back for seconds of the meatballs, but I had a bit of sweet treat.

Today I will:
Drink a ton of water (I like to keep this on my list so I remember to do it)
Pack my lunch for tomorrow
Eat a light dinner to balance out yesterday

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROGUE_1 5/6/2010 9:26PM

    Your running buddy is absolutely right - you ARE truly inspiring and motivating!!!

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GOALIEGRANDMA3 5/6/2010 12:01PM

    You a re a good decision maker and a friend to your walking buddy

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PINKCOCONUT 5/6/2010 10:37AM

    Isn't the weather AWESOME!?!?!? Glad you're taking advantage of it!

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JWENZEL723 5/6/2010 10:27AM

    i tried to soak in the sun too! i was in a cubicle all day, but i enjoyed it when i left work, haha.

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KARVY09 5/6/2010 8:23AM

    Yay for sun! Have a wonderful day!

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AGAWRITER 5/6/2010 8:11AM

    Enjoy the sunshine and have a great day. Thanks for sharing.

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ZACHERYSMAMA 5/6/2010 7:32AM

    May is an amazing month. Keep up the motivation.

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TMAC10 5/6/2010 7:29AM

    sounds like May is amazing so far! love your motivation!

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Cake resistance - DONE.

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

Yesterday I was determined to not eat a piece of cake from the faculty room. I had one small piece on Monday, and it was good. But I didn't want to eat that second piece. I stayed away. It looked so nasty sitting there yesterday - everyone had torn into it to get the moist inside pieces, so it looked as if a crazed animal had gotten at it. Gross.
There *were* some M&Ms, though, and I couldn't resist. I didn't go back for more, though. Small steps.
Today, the PTA is providing us with lunch. I thought about taking a salad along with me, but I don't want to appear ungrateful. So I think I'll eat what they have, and for dinner tonight, I'll eat what my lunch would have been on a normal day - salad, little bit of pasta, and yogurt.

I'm in the mood for some fresh flowers, so I think I'll stop and get some before school for me and some for two good buddies at school. I am not reading my enlightenment book anymore; it got a little too weird for me. I was helped, however, by the "focus" section of the book. So it gave me what I needed. My latest read is a book about how giving to others can make us happier. So far it's pretty interesting.

Yesterday's to-dos:
Water - YES!
Bike rack prices - YES! The one I really want is not getting released until June or July. The original date was May 4th, and I was all ready to buy it, but now the date is pushed back. Not sure if I should just be patient or if I should just look for a different one. I think I know what I'm going to do...
Padded gloves - YES! They are cute and purple. But even more important, they have SUPER gel padding.
Clean up the kitchen - YES! Oi, what a mess it was!
Calcium - YES! Fish oil - NO! I think I'll stop in at the natural food store today to look for this. Target only had two kinds, and I wasn't thrilled with either of them. The search continues.

Today I will:
Drink a ton of water
Not eat biscotti when I go for coffee after school
Stick with a low-fat latte after school (I think all the chocolate chai has been contributing to my slow/non-weight-loss.)
Do a 15-20 minute TM run with some intervals; strength train
Eat consciously at lunch today. Really think about the food I eat - is it worth it?

I am loving this new experiment - getting up without the alarm. I woke up at 5:30 today to the birds chirping. I wasn't tired at all!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROGUE_1 5/6/2010 9:30PM

    WOW! Getting up without the alarm?! I would probably STILL be sleeping RIGHT NOW.
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What did they serve at the PTA lunch? I can understand how you felt about bringing in your own food because I feel like that too sometimes but I bet they wouldn't feel offended if you did. Hopefully anyways!

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KLASSIE 5/5/2010 12:01PM

    Congratulations. You're learning what works for you. Good luck.

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PLAYBLUES22 5/5/2010 7:14AM

    emoticon

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HANSEEN 5/5/2010 7:13AM

    Keep up the good work. I know it is not easy

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RIPPEDPAUL1 5/5/2010 7:12AM

    Way to go . I think cake resistance is as difficult as weight resistance emoticon

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Hellooooo quads.

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

So after not even being able to stand up on Sunday morning after my crazy ride (literally I could not stand up. I had to sit down in the shower because my quads hurt so bad - even though I stretched and iced like a fiend), I went running last night with the ladies. My legs felt like lead, but I went. My run up the hill was more like a shuffle, but I went. It was a beautiful night - a little breeze, warm sun, and the humidity had gone away. Today I am taking another rest day (I just took one on Sunday) - my grip is weak because of my biking (it's getting better, though, so I'm not as worried) so I don't want to do any weight training. The only thing I might do tonight is go for a little swim. We'll see.

Today was the first day of my new experiment. I set the alarm for 6:30, the latest I could get up and still get ready in time, and woke up to the sun and the birds at 6:00. Definitely a more pleasant way to get up than the alarm. I'll try it again tomorrow.

It's teacher appreciation week at school - yesterday morning the PTA brought us some breakfast. I forgot they were doing this, so I ate at home. But it looked so good - I had 1/2 a bagel with cream cheese and smoked salmon (I justify this by telling you we don't get this at home - it was SO good), and a piece of homemade banana bread (I LOVE good homemade bread, and I have to support the PTA). The administration also sent in a gigantic chocolate cake with buttercream icing. It is SOOO good - very moist and yummy. So I had a little piece with lunch. I was very excited because normally I go back for a 2nd, even bigger, piece. But not yesterday. I stuck with one piece and totally enjoyed it. There will be leftovers today, but I am determined to stay away. It's never as good the 2nd day, anyway. I think I'll pack a little note in my lunch - "Don't eat the cake! You want to fit in that skirt!"

Yesterday's to-dos:
Water - YES!!!
Clean up dishes - as best i could. Honey cooked dinner last night, and he leaves a LOT of dishes. I will take tonight to clean up the kitchen.
Pack lunch - didn't do this last night. Again, honey in the kitchen = no other space to pack lunch. I packed my lunch this morning.
Enjoy my run - YES!!!! It was SO nice. I wasn't very social (sometimes I just like to take the time to think) but I enjoyed it anyway.

Today I will:
Drink a ton of water
Call around to get prices for a bike rack - maybe go buy one?
Buy padded gloves for my biking
Clean up the kitchen
Pick up some calcium and fish oil supplements

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JWENZEL723 5/6/2010 10:26AM

    haha i love the little note that you are going to pack! i agree, food is usually never as good the second time around - good reminder!

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EATNBOOGERS 5/4/2010 2:10PM

    It occurred to me that different grips on your handlebars might help, too. You have to ease into cycling--there are lots of tender bits on your body! :-O

We had the volunteer appreciation tea at school today. I took some healthy stuff (strawberries!) but I also took a very small piece of cheesecake (a la your chocolate cake). It was very good, but yeah, who needs more than about 3 bites, anyway?

My version of your skirt: I have a pair of capris that I feel like a sausage in now, and also a very fitted sweater that I really love that I would feel more comfortable in if I were a bit slimmer. I'm looking at them every day.

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SPARKLINGDAWN 5/4/2010 11:36AM

    I know EXACTLY how your body feels. It is the same each year when I start up after the winter. It takes a LOT of Motrin to get through the first week.............
Padded shorts and gloves is the key here - and make SURE the saddle is in right position from the gound/pedals.

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2010TRIATHLETE 5/4/2010 10:41AM

    Kudos on going on your run, even with the sore quads! That cake sounds YUMMY! Good idea to put a note in your lunch. Just think, it will probably be all hard & stale anyway. emoticon

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GROOVYCHICK9 5/4/2010 10:23AM

    I love love love bagels and cream cheese and don't have them often. So when I do it is such a treat. Sounds like you are enjoying your biking. I used to live in Utah and would go biking all the time. Boy would I get sore at the beginning of the season. But what fun. It will get easier. Keep taking care of yourself.

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OZXIA1 5/4/2010 9:04AM

    Nice job finding satisfaction with cake piece #1 and resisting cake piece #2....sometimes it's better to gracefully bow to a small temptation before it comes to knock you over with a swift kick in the shins - you did well!!

Happy hunting for your bike gear...my husband is an avid recreational bike rider - those padded gloves you're looking for are certainly a KEY to a more comfortable ride. He also swears by the consumption of pineapple pieces (or just pineapple juice) after a long ride - says it helps with lactic acid build up. I've never researched to suss out the validity of his claim - but since he started doing it, the complaining about muscle soreness and cramping has seriously decreased (which makes ME happy on soooo many levels!). Just a random thought for you!

Good luck with your to-do list today!
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KARVY09 5/4/2010 8:28AM

    Bagel + Cream Cheese + Smoked Salmon = Food of the Gods

I seriously could subsist on this for weeks and weeks without complaint.

Good luck with your goals today!

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