Sunday, March 30, 2014
Sorry about my outburst in my last entry...I REALLY needed to get all that frustration out to SOMEBODY because it was driving me wild with no outlet big enough to handle the surge that was trying to explode out lol! I'm...staying away from pilates. Like, really away. I don't need to start crying after 80 seconds of trying s video.
ANYWHO, I FINALLY get the see my boyfriend tomorrow night!! For the first time since August!! I'm so excited it's unbelievable! I get to see my precious Aggieland again for a whole week! HOORAY!!! With it being practically a holiday for me (and AggieCon! WHOOP!), I do expect to go way over my calorie limits and all that for a couple days straight, so I know my weight is going to bounce back up for a bit...but I'm prepared for it. Almost welcoming it, even, considering all the fun and reunions it represents to me! Heck, I'm kind of hoping the damage won't be as bad as I'm expecting since I'll prety much be walking everywhere in town. My boyfriend is situated within walking distance (for me, anyway) of 99% of the places I need/want to go! Yes!!
Now, last night I did get a scare from my laptop. After troubleshooting/researching a bit, I've come to the conclusion that the ac port is damaged (something probably loose) and needs to be fixed. Which, from what I hear, can cost me $150ish. Still better than a totally new computer, but ouch! I do have a temporary "fix", though, so I can use my machine...I just need to duct tape the jack into the port REALLY tightly until I can get it to someone....better than nothing.
Thursday, March 27, 2014
Every time I try one of the stupid pilates video I end up crying within 2 minutes. I feel like such a failure and a stupid lump of useless. Even the beginner/intro video makes me just feel TERRIBLE about myself. I end up crying for what feels like forever afterward. I can't seem to do anything. I can't even do the simplest stuff I'm so pathetic. I hate it so much.
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Though we're all still worried about them, one of my friends can already accept visitors. The others are still going in and out of surgery and apparently some vertebrae are involved now so...yeah, I'll be worried sick until ALL of them can take visitors. :( Thank God for technology so I can get updates as they happen or I would just be beside myself.
In personal health related news, I've been slacking on exercise the past few days. Partly due to a slight fever on my part (which was mostly just yesterday, I admit), and cold weather outside. I was walking 2-3 miles almost every day last week (sometimes 4!), but we got hit with another bought of winter and snow and I REALLY don't want to go walking in that chill, especially if it means putting myself at risk to renew that fever.
I ate a bit too much yesterday (wouldn't have been a problem if I could muster up energy for exercise, at least?), but I'm determined to do better from here on out. I just need some indoor exercises that won't leave me feeling awful and unable to breath like a lot of cardio videos on the site tend to do. I don't want to push myself and risk getting sicker before my trip week after next. I have too much to do to get ready...and then, you know...the trip itself, lol
Even if it's just trying to march in place for a couple minutes I need to try something...even a tiny amount of exercise is better than no exercise at all.
Sunday, March 16, 2014
I've eaten way more than I should today. Way, way more. And I honestly don't care. I don't care if it's emotional eating, either. I just don't.
Four good friends of mine were in a car accident this morning and, though they're all alive and will be alright, I'm worried sick and feel so far away and helpless. Their recoveries are going to take a good while and it's going to be anything but a picnic, but just THANK GOD they're all alive, you know? I just keep imagining what they're going through and I end up starting to cry all over again. You look at pictures of their car and....you're just amazed that they all survived. The injuries are going to take a while to heal...and I just wish there was something I could do to help.
Whether you pray or not, believe in God or not, whatever. Please send good thoughts for them and their families.
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