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Now what to do....

Thursday, October 23, 2014


Okay some input please!!! I know some of you know some background but not sure if you all do. I worked in nursing for years, mostly long term care ( seniors). I have degenerative and herniation of my lower back, osteo arthritis in my knees, back, mid back, ankles. I get sciatica badly at least once a year and usually lasts for month or so. I get neuropathy in my toes and down my calf mostly L side. I have arthritis in my thumbs and fingers and sometimes my hands. Sooooooooo.... I had to stop work 4 years ago and have been waiting for knee replacements for nearly 2 years. Interestingly enough, my knees haven't been as severe in past few months, now have heard that sometimes the bones ( it is bone on bone on R knee and near that on L) rub smooth and don't hurt as much. Or perhaps cos I have been doing so much phsyio to get my legs and knees strong for replacement surgery, which I don't really want. Okay I can still walk, do limp some days, etc. but balance has been chore since I was a kid. I was told by my GP that it probably wont help my back issues or the arthritis and fibromyalgia. Oh and have gained some this year and need to lose 45-50 lbs. I know that I am not great arthritis wise and cant work and that knee surg. isn't going to change that but still I don't want to be old and have it done, but also don't want it done if not totally necessary.

Here's the kicker.... My dad who will be 89 Nov 23rd. lives in our basement, pretty self sufficient but I do make some of his meals, help him with his socks and such. He has a chair lift to come up to our main level when he wants ( rarely he is not a social being and rather grouchy, always has been). Okay some may know that end sept he was hospitalized for 9 days after having a chest xray and finding a sac of fluid behind the chest wall and lung area, called a plural effusion. They don't know what caused it or what to do for it. So they drained 1 liter immediately in ER then his other lung collapsed and hence hospital. 2 wks later we spent all day at ER waiting to get in, then after another hr they drained yet another liter. His dr called Monday wanting to see him.... Blood work back. NO not cancer which I thought ( my mum died of lung cancer and they both were smokers dad still is, outside only so smoking less). But his kidneys are not working at all well, should be at least a 66 his is 24. dr said stage 4 kidney failure, 5 is dyalisis and they probably wont do it cos of age, breathing issues and such. he said I don't want it. also no life support or assistance. he has been failing in kidneys ( I didn't know) for few years so dr didn't say any time line etc. dr will send him for CT scan and also respirologist to see what to do about this lung issue.

Okay again...... I got a missed call from the knee surgeon today while we were out. They didn't leave a message but presume they will call tomorrow. usually 6 wks prior to surgery. What do I do!!! I have waited 2 years and go to the bottom of the list if I say no. I will be 58 end of this year. it sure isn't a good time, but then if dad is with us he will be sicker in 2 years, and if not we want to build on our land in Windsor an hr from city and is in cottage country ( so woods). Hubby isn't going to want to drive in daily and I don't want to be in the midst of building a house or whatever.( we have to sell to build so will be living in our RV and on a time line or have to live here and not afford it so well till we see what goes on with my knees...... my son works 2 jobs and has 2 kids and he suffers from crohns disease so is busy and not able to help a lot. My daughter will help but doesn't drive. She can help around here and with dad but not at appointments etc. I suppose hubby can drive them to er and she can stay with him. OMG she freaks at any of that, cries when I tell her things that are wrong with him. Hubby has anxiety and said he isn't going to sit at hospital every time dad has to go to have the stuff drained. Anyway, just venting and nervous. don't want surgery,/ want it over with, would love to go into my 58th year with the worst knee done and then concentrate on me. granted I say that every year don't we all! LOL but my knees aren't super sore now, but then tomorrow maybe but raining for 3 days and not bad, back, etc yea but not knees.
Ahhhhhhhhhhh there now. typed enough! thanks gals!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

1CRAZYDOG 10/24/2014 12:19PM

    Ok, you don't say which knee. If it's the right leg which you'd use for driving, then you'd be out of commission for at least 3 wks. on that score. But if it's the left knee, you could still do that much. If you could find someone to help out in the meantime . . . that's obviously the glitch.

It is absolutely right that once the knee is bone-on-bone, it actually gets less painful because it is essentially polishing itself smooth.

Anyhow, if it were me, I'd go for it. Had my right knee replaced in 2007 4 mths. after we moved from Illinois to Wisconsin. Hectic, but managed.

Good luck!

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SLAYINGDRAGONS 10/24/2014 6:17AM

    I'm saying a prayer for you right now. If you don't do it, will you wonder if you should 'ave? No one can know the outcome or the future. You must set your mind on the present and deal with the present. Try to focus on the present and that will narrow it down a bit for you to help you focus on what you really want to do.
emoticon As difficult as it is, the decision is only yours to make.

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SOPHIEDO13 10/24/2014 5:38AM

    Sometimes pain or symptoms disappear don't know why but they always come back 58 is young and you'd heal faster ....they older you get the harder it would be. Just my opinion. Prayers to you Dear.

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NEW-CAZ 10/24/2014 2:55AM

    Cinders if you don't do it now it could worsen and then you'd up you-know-what-creek without a paddle. If DH and your daughter have to step up to the plate,,,,,,so be it.

Just do it! emoticon

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RAWCOOKIE 10/24/2014 2:35AM

    this is what you said ", would love to go into my 58th year with the worst knee done and then concentrate on me."

emoticon

wonky knees contribute to a wonky back etc due to the knock-on effect of a change in gait (you know all that!)

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COSMIC_ENERGY 10/23/2014 10:53PM

    Cinders--Just do it. Take care of yourself now. If you don't want it--'s another story.
The answer will come to you. emoticon

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Dads Dr apointment

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

First off I too got an ad, but when I made it small enough was able to click it off and get to the videos. oh well.
So dads dr appointment was a surprise for me and probably him too. Not cancer which I am sure lisa( dd )and I to some extent) thought cos he has smoked since he was 15 and is almost 89. but will write what I told a friend I was messanging with so I don't copy it all again.

-so dads appointment, was mostly blood work results. which show his kidneys are very very poorly functioning. of a 5 they are 4 , 5 is dyalisis and they probably wont do it and he doesn't want it. He also can hear fluid so said don't be surprised you will have to go back to ER. He checked his heart and his neck veins and said you are not in heart failure. So he said while you both here and okay, I want to clarify DNR etc. so no breathing assistance either which I knew. But he did say not to worry about that now. I said does he need to go to the urologist now cos he doesn't seem to want to and he said there are more pressing things than that and what the urologist will say is what I have said. If you want to go then yes but don't stress over that. -


So, I knew he had to pee all the time, and didn't pee much, but didn't know it was kidney disease or that advanced. Anyway dr is going to send him for CT scan of chest and to a respirologist to see if there is anything to do with this fluid build up. I don't think there is much more he can do for the kidneys. also he is anemic and is checking his calcium too.

Not much to say right now as not really sure what's going to happen. Guess he was telling us what to expect down the road. anyway.

I had a good day at supper. After the dr dad wanted to go to supper, I chose fish and when they said baked, mashed or fries I said can I have extra veggies instead of any potato. Sure. so that's what I did. Also cos my heartburn is bad, bad, bad with the prednisone really bad. I started taking my nexium and don't want any choc. as it just makes it worse.

The video I listened to really made me think and then the 2nd one she said two lines.

What I put inside my body is 100% my control. Don't ask yourself if you are full, ask is my hunger gone..... Melissa Joulwan

I really took that to heart and today it helped more than once! I have to get ready for bed as haven't been sleeping well again and it is nearly 11 pm.

HUGS and hope you all had a great day.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MORTICIAADDAMS 10/22/2014 10:15AM

    I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. Kidney function does seem to go down a lot when they get up in years but your dad's is progressing rapidly. My mom and dad managed their problems for years with diet. It would probably help your dad as well.

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NEW-CAZ 10/22/2014 3:02AM

    Sounds like the docs were thorough in your dad's assessment Cinders, hard on him and on you, sorry hun.

Good supper choice. emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 10/21/2014 10:05PM

    Well, glad there's clarification on what to expect in the future for your Dad., **SIGH** It's hard!

You did good with your choices. Good job!

HUGS

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AWESOME

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

women.paleohacks.com/neely-quinn/

I so hope this works, as it is awesome. goes on about binging, emotional eating her breaking up with chocolate forever. and also how she learned bout her body. 36 mins but fantastic. only available for today .

She says some can have treats in beginning, some can't and you have to learn what is right for you. She also said say out loud to yourself or hubby etc. I am CHOOSING To binge now, I am going to compromise my body's health. often that will stop you or really make you binge less.

very interesting video.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TEMPEST272002 10/21/2014 3:42PM

    Sounds cool. Too bad we have limited internet here (can't download videos).

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1CRAZYDOG 10/21/2014 1:40PM

    Same . . . only got an advert, but the premise of saying "I am going to binge" out loud sounds like a good strategy to stop and think.

Wishing you luck.

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MORTICIAADDAMS 10/21/2014 1:37PM

    It sounds good. That statement would definitely make one think before binging.

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NEW-CAZ 10/21/2014 12:46PM

    the link didn't work for me Cinders only got an advert! emoticon

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Just had to share....

Thursday, October 16, 2014





Pictures of my grandbabies... Dil puts them on FB but has a very closed page which is great but at times I gotta share LOL

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CLAIREINPARIS 10/19/2014 12:34AM

    Awwwww they are both so cute!

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JUSTYNA7 10/17/2014 4:35PM

    I'm looking forward to that day... kids are not ready yet but talking... lovely GB's!

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MORTICIAADDAMS 10/17/2014 12:23PM

    They are beautiful! Just like grandma.

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DS9KIE 10/17/2014 1:00AM

    cute

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SLENDERELLA61 10/16/2014 7:27PM

    How darling! Thanks for sharing.

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LIVINGLOVINLIFE 10/16/2014 5:52PM

    They are so cute.

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1CRAZYDOG 10/16/2014 5:45PM

    DEFINITELY the daily dose of supremely cute!

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NEW-CAZ 10/16/2014 3:54PM

    awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww cute or what!!!! emoticon

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2014TODAY 10/16/2014 3:33PM

    Owwww they must be such a joy to you.

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BROOKLYN_BORN 10/16/2014 3:19PM

    Beautiful!

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GRANDMABABA 10/16/2014 1:24PM

    Adorable!

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FORZACHANDMATT 10/16/2014 12:59PM

    So cute

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So tired from yesterday...

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Well dad had dr appointment at 9:45 so took him and we got out at 11. so had to go to dil as we promised we would get them a load of stone as they are having flooding issues at their back basement door and the guy was going to fix it for them that afternoon. NO problem had dr not suggested dad go for xray. So we told lay down and rest for bit and we will not be long. so we arrived at the hospital at 12, had his exray and they said yes go to ER..... over 7 hrs later he got into the bed area and then saw a dr. He had an ultrasound to see where was the best place to go in and drain again. Then dr did that and then had another xray to check and said go home. we got home at 12:30 am! he will be 89 in November - what a figgin long wait. geesh.

Anyway glad it worked this time but nervous of the fact that 2 wks after getting out of hosp. he has to get this done again, nearly 1.5 liters again. they don't know what is causing it so presume it will start up again. Man every 2 wks of going and getting this done - not good for him and wears us all out. Hoping he sleeps today, he did go out alone this am for his coffee but right back. Sigh. feel bad for him, but nothing that can be done till they figure what to do. I have a dr apt oct 29th and he has a heart spec. same day 1 hr apart so probably hubby will take him. I tried to get either apt changed, his wouldn't be till mid nov and mine end nov. so don't want that. My dr secretary will try to fit me in wed afternoon if able other wise hubby said he will take him, but I wanted to go in with him. He wont go in with him.

Well today off to get some groceries, out of veggies and such and some good sales at one store. best go and get a bit done. my arm is still very sore.
HUGS

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CLAIREINPARIS 10/19/2014 12:37AM

    I am so sorry, for your dear father and for you... what a stressful and exhausting day it was! I really hope they figure out very soon what to do.

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MORTICIAADDAMS 10/17/2014 1:18PM

    I hate to hear that dad is having this problem again. They need to admit him and find the root cause.

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DS9KIE 10/17/2014 1:03AM

    emoticon

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2014TODAY 10/16/2014 3:37PM

    Hugs. These are very difficult things to deal with.

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NEW-CAZ 10/16/2014 10:38AM

    For an 88 year old to have to deal with this must be hard..................and no doubt he's being cantankerous too!! Poor Cinders, hang in there hun.
I hope the appts go well, not long to wait now! emoticon

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BRAINBENTT 10/16/2014 10:29AM

    emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 10/16/2014 10:25AM

    emoticon

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