Monday, August 18, 2014
There are days I wake up and I just don't want to do anything, starting with getting up out of bed. Days that I just want to curl up in a tiny little place, hide from the world and just cry. Well yesterday was one of those days. On such days everyone tries to make it better but really all they end up doing is making it worse and stressing them selves out. I don't want to be hugged, I don't want to be comforted, I don't want to go out my front door let alone be out in public and/or go shopping. Yes I have spoken to my doctor about depression, yes I have had a problem with depression in the past, and no medications have NOT been a good idea in the past. Yes she gave me a list of new ones we could talk about but most of them upon looking them up say do not take if you have had a heart attack and/or heart disease....I think maybe she forgot to read what is in my file and if I take any of those medications my heart dr is going to go global! Exercise use to help, like going for my run or just hopping on my treadmill but as for the last couple of months they don't work and the only thing I can say on a positive note is suicide is not an option for me, see my mom is in heaven and I am going to get there eventually but I wont get there if I take the easy way out!!!! suicide is a sin even to Jewish people like myself.