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I want smaller arms

Monday, April 14, 2014

Inches are coming off all over my body, except my arms. My arms have never been attractive in my opinion. They've always been big, except when I was riding horses several times a week. i've been working on my arms lately and I've noticed more definition but I still feel uncomfortable in short sleeves. Like today, I'm wearing a shirt that is squeezing the crap out of my upper arms. It's annoying. I keep checking to make sure my bra straps are up and they are, it's just these pesky sleeves!

I want definition, but not the loose, sagging skin that comes along with that definition. Is this even possible without surgery?

Other than my arms, things have been going relatively well. NOw that the weather is cooperating I've been going outside to play with my son every chance I get. It's wonderful being so active. I'm not seeing much inthe way of weight loss though. i've hit a plateau which is slightly discouraging but I know I'll make it through. I'm still getting compliments on my weight loss on an almost daily rate so I know I'm doing something right.

I'm still running despite the time crunch I'm constantly finding myself under. My runs are more enjoyable now that they're really the only free-timee I get anymore. with my husband working nights, I come home from work and I have to be 100% there for matthew. I don't mind this at all, but I sometimes wish I could have my husband's help watching him at night, even if it's just 10 minutes while I take a shower. Percy had off last night so I was able to take a shower before 6pm. It was soooo nice and I made sure to tell Percy how much I appreciated that he watched Matthew while I took that time for myself.

I've been putting Matthew to bed at 8-8:30 and I've been staying up another hour just so I can have SOME time to myself. That hour is usually devoted to doing dishes or getting things ready for the next day. Sometimes I even have to cook because Matthew won't let me cook when I come home; he misses me and wants all of mommy's attention.

I'm not going to lie, I'm exhausted. I'm so looking forward to our trip in August. It's going to be sooo great.

Now I just have to get in shape for it ;)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REFFIE1 4/15/2014 6:11PM

    I have the opposite problem. I never lose anything from my tummy. But my arms and legs get skinny! Oh dear, why won't the weight leave from where we want it to? emoticon

Comment edited on: 4/15/2014 6:12:17 PM

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ABAKER34 4/14/2014 2:54PM

    I completely understand where you are coming from, I have two boys of my own and work full time as well (I'm up at 4 in the morning and home at 5:15 at night, and as soon as I get home it's time to get dinner ready, spend time with the kids, then immediately get them ready for bed by 8:00). In the evenings when I exercise it's the only "me" time I get to myself (I run on my treadmill in my house because it's normally too dark by then to go outside), and it's often interrupted by my 4 year old tattling on his brother. It sounds like your son is younger, and it does get easier as they get a little older and more self sufficient, so just keep pushing.

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New job, new routine

Tuesday, April 08, 2014

I started a new job yesterday. It's only temporary but it could become permanent. I'm workingin the same office but different division. The pace is a lot quicker so my Sparking maybe a little more infrequent. I barely made it to the gym yesterday. I don't think I'll get there today because of training. Wednesday I'm definitely hitting it the gym though. My boss is so nice. I feel so lucky to have been given this opportunity. The next week or two is going to be stressful trying to reinvent my routine though, but once I do I'll be fine.

I binged a bit last night. I'm not happy about it, but it's okay. I'll get back on track today. I just hope the training room won't be filled with pastry and candy. That might be too big of a temptation. I knew I should have packed an apple this morning...

I've gained a few pounds over the last week, whcih is normal this time of month. I hope I can get back down to 165 and continue to go down to meet my 163lb goal by the end of the month. It's possible with a lot of work, but with the new job I don't know how committed to it I'l be. I just have to keep telling myself to commit to it, because if I let the job become an excuse then my entire effort will be jeapordised. I have my motivation right next to my computer monitor though, a picture of me at my soun's baptism. I'm about 185-190lbs. I look aweful and i can remember the agony of trying to get ready that morning. Everything I put on felt uncomfortable. The otfit I settled on didn't make me look any better but it was the best I could do that morning. I refuse to put myself in that position again. REFUSE. That's why I'm going to do what I can to continue to lose this weight.

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DMEYER4 4/8/2014 7:06AM

  emoticon just keep your eye on the end results . a healthier ,happier you.

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Hormone-Induced Rant, of Sorts (Sorry, guys)

Monday, March 31, 2014

I am in such a weird place right now. I'm feeling motivated but sluggish. I'm discouraged by my appearance today. I feel like a boy in my baggy jeans and flannel shirt. I'm still between sizes and feel like I'm getting bigger, but the scale has only gone up 1 or 2 pounds. Maybe it's the lingering winter blues or maybe it's because I'm getting close to my time of the month. I always get this way a week or so before, but I read in Runners Magazine that this is normal for female runners. Usually the week before our respiration levels are higher which can make us slower. That makes total sense and makes me feel a little less aweful about my state of being.

Saturday I woke up with some sort of lung infection. It felt like someone was sitting on my chest and squeezing my ribs every time I tried to take a breath. I have a history of pulmonary embolism so it was a little alarming, but after a 2 hour nap (thank you hubby for watch Matthew) and a good nights' sleep I felt 100% better on Sunday. AND then it started to snow. Gosh dang it when will Spring get her act together? They say it's going to be 60 degrees today but it was windy and bitter this morning so I don't know how it's going to get up that high. Hopefully I can get out there for a few miles though. That would be awesome. That's what I need, some nice fresh air to sooth my angst.

I've been looking for 10ks in my area but nothing is conveniently located or affordable. There's one at the end of May that looks like fun but it's almost $100. That's insane! There's another one that's flatter, and cheaper, but it's also 2 hours away and with a 2 year old that maybe hitting his limit.

Sorry, I don't mean to be miss negativity. I really do hate being this way. I'm going to try to overcome my hormone-induced doubt and say goodbye--more like, good ridance!--to March 2014 by going for a run in the park, followed by my TRX/KB class.

Thank you all for your support!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REFFIE1 3/31/2014 4:48PM

I don't blame you for being mad at the weather enough snow already. I have severe asthma and know how horrible it is when you can't breathe. Glad you are feeling better! It is sunny and beautiful where I live and some flowers are out so hang in there because Spring is just around the corner. emoticon

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MARAGRAM 3/31/2014 4:36PM

    I can't even blame hormones, but there are times when it just is hard to breath/much less exercise at normal level.

Keep trying!

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REDSASSENACH 3/31/2014 10:57AM

    I, too, am facing shark week in about 6 days, and it's messing with me. Pretty lame that for at least 10 days a month I'm fighting against a hormonal monster inside of me that wants me to eat everything in sight and then go to sleep.

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Thank Goodness for Dreams

Thursday, March 27, 2014

Last night I had a dream that I was working as a mentor for at-risk youth. It was a beatiful spring or summer day and we were all outside having a picnic or something. Then, two of the kids began to fist fight, one of which was a young woman with an enormous about of rage and energy built up. I separated her from the pack and told her to run around the perimeter of the play fields to burn up that energy. She verbally fought me on it, telling me it was stupid, but I simply told her to "follow me." I began running. I looked over my shoulder to see her staring at me wide-eyed for a second and then she began to chase after me. I smiled and picked up the pace. I was so fit and agile. I was leaping over things and dodging people and trees. It felt wonderful and I looked amazing! And every once and awhile I'd look back to see if the young woman still followed. She did. By the end of the dream she was running with me, smiling, and then she kept going. I think some time had passed because she came back to me and said, "I won the State cross-county title this year all because of you." That's when I woke up.

I think this dream represents my state of mind over the last few weeks. I've been the young defiant woman, angry and bitter for reasons I can't pin down. But slowly, I'm leading myself out of that funk so I can eventually be everything I want to be and more! This dream helped me find that visual again. I think that has been a problem for me lately, I haven't been able to visualize myself at my goal weight for awhile.

If you haven't discovered it already, visualization is a key component to weight loss. If you lose the vision you lose perspective, you start to doubt yourself, and your motivation wanes.

I'm so glad to have my vision back! emoticon emoticon emoticon Here I come!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REFFIE1 3/28/2014 10:23PM

    My dreams are usually pretty strange when I remember them. How cool you have ones that are inspirational! So glad you can see all the great things that await you! emoticon

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PERSISTENTTIM 3/27/2014 3:04PM

    I've not thought about it really but I do feel better when I focus and visualize the future and a healthier me. Take care!

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JANET552 3/27/2014 9:54AM

    Great advice!! On Spark Coach, each day starts with a visualization. Until I tried Spark Coach I never did that but I've learned its usefulness now. Keep pushing!!

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It's PepTalk Time!

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Today has been hard, I don't know why. I'm eating well and working out, but still, I keep battling negative thoughts. Yesterday, as I finished week 4, day 3 of my bridge to 10k program, I kept thinking, "How am I ever going to run a 10k when I can barely run a 5k?" I didn't enterain that thought for too long. I fought back with "that's what you said 3 years ago when you started training for your 5k, and you've run 3 of them!" It seems daunting now, but it will get easier and as long as I keep up with my training it will be possible. I just have to keep telling myself that over and over and over.

Then today, as I was doing yoga, for the first time in a few months I looked in the mirror and went, "EW!" That reaction startled me. Up until now I've been very proud of how I look, but today all I could focus on was the tire around my middle. It seemed more prominant today than it has been and it really bothered me. BUT I know how to fix it! I just need to get back into doing core workouts, although that'll be disciplining myself to do them at home since no core class is being offered at my gym anymore. well, that's not true. There is one being offered but I don't like the instructor they hired, so I use those days to go running. Still focusing on core is really important for runners, so I'll try to get that into my daily habit.

Tonight, to keep myself motivated, I'm going to use a SP recipe that I love but haven't dished up for awhile.

*SIGH* Wow, I feel better already!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

F70176555 3/26/2014 3:06PM

    You are going to do great!! emoticon

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