JOHNNY90210   2,017
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Short entry

Saturday, February 01, 2014

Feeling a bit naff in myself. Been hard couple of weeks. I have moved in to my mum's short term. I have to move around 3rd week of Feb. I am meant to be getting my life back on track near London. I feel like I am almost starting from scratch again.
Hardly any money, no job and no where to live yet. Was meant to be staying with a mate but that fell through.
I know it will be very good for me to get back to my life in Brighton but it is scary. Things did not go as well as I wanted last time. I seriously need to do this but fear of teh unknown always been a bit of a killer for me...

Really trying to get back on track with my healthy eating, but life keeps getting in the way. The excuse I am using is stress.. Yet I know that is a bit lame and convenient even if its true lol.
REALLY want to lose several stone by the summer. Also my best mate and his GF said they will come to Centre Parcs near end of the year with me. Lots of swimming there and I really want to be slim enough to feel comfortable with no tshirt on etc.
My mate has a nice body and right now I would not dream of being topless lol.
Most of all I want to lose weight for me thought. I am so tried and sad of being over weight.

Well I will keep trying to get back on track!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TINY67 2/2/2014 3:02PM

    emoticon emoticon

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TENNISJIM 2/2/2014 6:03AM

    You can do it. You stated it. So, you will succeed.

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.DUSTY. 2/2/2014 1:08AM

    I'm glad you have a place to live at least short term. Take it a step at a time.

One thing you can control is what you eat. I know that's really hard especially with all the stress going on.

Stay Strong! It will all work out!

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LIVINHEALTHY9 2/1/2014 7:03PM

    Don't get down on yourself.
Just take it one day / one step at a time.

Keep pushing. You can do it!

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MIA-MORSEL 2/1/2014 5:05PM

    C'mon lad, get yourself a cheap pedometer, wear it all day, every day and start walking. Begin with baby steps, see how many steps you usually do in a day and then add 500 more as and when you are able.

I do all my steps indoors, all 8000 daily steps, so there's absolutely no excuse not to get moving. You'll be amazed at the way the pounds drop off. me!!

Google 'you tube walk away the pounds' and chose a few to put in your browser. free of charge....what are you waiting for!!! Blog and post in your teams about your progress and allow us all to cheer you on.

Use the food tracker to record your meals and stay within your calorie range.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Still so so BUT

Friday, January 03, 2014

I can see a nice big fat shinning light at the end of the tunnel!

Yesterday I bought Paul Mckenna's new book on over coming emotional eating.
I was sceptical only because I am a huge fan of Paul. Reason I was sceptical is because I thought you have already bought 2 or 3 books out that cover this very subject.
I have huge respect for Paul but he is often seen as as someone just trying to make money.
If you read his self help books you actually get to know him a bit. Of course he wants to make money!! Yet you can tell that he actually cares about you as a person and wants you to change and be happy etc etc.

Anyway near the start of this new book he actually addresses this issue. He explains why he felt this book was very much needed. I have to say after reading half of it and doing the hypnosis CD a few times since yesterday. I agree.
Emotional eating is my big problem really.Over the years I have lived a life of being more than unhappy. I guess like a lot food is my friend to an extent. I eat when I am bored, lonely or whatever. Even when I know I am not hungry.

Even though parts of what he was telling me has been covered in other books, there were still things that kinda woke me up. The Hypnosis CD is a strange one. It only lasts 22 mins and seems a small bit rushed.. I am sure it is not, yet I am used to them being a bit longer. However even though I cannot see why I can already feeling after listening to it the first time something feels different. I am happier for a start I feel a shift has changed but hard to explain. I will keep listening for next 7 days as he says too.

Anyway just thought I would share this and keep the blogs updated with progress.

Thanks all for your kind comments on my blogs.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TENNISJIM 1/4/2014 6:15AM

    Thank you for sharing. You can do it.

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    Great Job, Johnny!!! That is fantastic that you are taking charge of your health. So proud of you. Have a wonderful day and continue to take good care. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JOHNNY90210 1/3/2014 10:55AM

    Thanks very much :)

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CHANGEOLA 1/3/2014 10:54AM

    Way to go Johnny! Hope everything works out for you :-D

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Own worst enemy

Wednesday, January 01, 2014

I do my own head in sometimes.
Past few days of doing my healthy eating, has had good an bad points.
Overall I have done pretty good. Yet Last night and today I have totally messed up!! I ate far more than I needed or wanted really and today has been the same.
Sure it was new year but that is not the point. I feel frustrated with myself as I feel I have let myself down. I am always too harsh on myself I have been told.

I just want to succeed so badly. I know there will be times like this. Yet it just feels bigger than it probably is. I feel like I have messed it all up will prob gain a pound or more.
It is very hard to re motivate myself. I wish I was not so hard on myself.

Oh well little rant over lol

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHANGEOLA 1/2/2014 7:34AM

    Johnny, I am glad you got that off of your chest and you definitely have some great advice here; I hope you take it too emoticon Johnny this road is never going to be perfect; we slip up because heck that's life. Like the others have said, baby steps and shifting your focus. Think of these great actions you are taking today that will lead to a healthier lifestyle tomorrow. I focus meal to meal, instead of day to day. If you slip up, get right back on track with your next meal. Lastly be kind and gracious to yourself, you would forgive your friend for a slight offense right? So why not forgive yourself? emoticon emoticon emoticon

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TENNISJIM 1/2/2014 6:07AM

    One step at a time. You can do it.

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DBALZER 1/1/2014 1:40PM

    Don't be hard on yourself. That can be distracting. Not every choice is going to be a good one. What really counts and will make the changes you are making permanent is making more good choices than bad ones on a consistent basis. Sounds like you are on the way there! Keep up the good work!

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    What helps me, Johnny, and perhaps will help you too is not focusing on the negative. Build yourself up by thinking of the positive measures you have taken to attain great health and continue to focus on them. Beating yourself up has no benefit. This is about learning and changing your habits and creating healthy habits. One step back, two steps forward. You can do it!!!! You deserve great health, you really do. Happy New Year!! emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 2/1/2014 3:33:07 PM

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Feel bit more in control

Monday, December 30, 2013

It is weird as it is only my second day of following Paul Mckenna I can make you thin again, yet already I feel a bit more in control.

Food has always been such a big aspect of my life. In a lot of ways I guess it was my life.
The times I see people post pics of there dinner etc on Facebook 'always thought it was a tad sad people doing that'. Everyone says OMG that looks amazing. You know what I think... That portion looks a bit small. I am greedy, but I don't believe its my fault anymore.
Emotional eating has ruled my life and became part of me. Most of the time I would scoff food not really taste or chew it. But studies shows that happy chemicals are released when you do that, but they are short lived.

Yesterday was a little hard as we still have a lot of food and snacks left over from xmas. For example in our kitchen there are 5 packs of pringles, mince pies, different boxes of chocolates, and loads of diff cheeses in the fridge,.
I battled a bit yesterday not to indulge much.
Over all the eating went very well, yet in the evening I did struggle a small bit.

Something funny happened. I was stood in the kitchen looking at the pringles. I decided no I was not going to have any. I went to walk away, and I am not joking it was like something forced my foot back onto the floor as I went to move.
I had to laugh as right then I realised how there is two parts of me. One that wants to succeed and one that is my old me trying to hold on. It was just amusing how I had said no and went to walk away, and yet something inside me over rode me. How dare it!!! lol.
May sound strange but that was what happened.

Anyway I feel more positive and I accept there will be good days and bad days. I love that I have started a few days before new year. Everyone seems to start on new year.

Cannot wait to see what I will look like as I start to slim down. I am going to really look after my body and mind.

I quite like bogging but not much to say really. x

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TENNISJIM 12/31/2013 6:17AM

    You can do it and you will look great!

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LISASGONNADOIT 12/30/2013 4:56PM

    Love your honesty in your blog .... great job walking away from the Pringles! All of my holiday food is gone, thank God, because if I have it around I eat it. Excellent job taking the bull by the horns and starting a healthy lifestyle prior to the New Year!!! Keep up the awesome motivation and determination! I added you as a friend, hopefully you will add me too. Happy 2014! emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 12/30/2013 4:57:12 PM

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CANADIANFROG09 12/30/2013 7:09AM

    emoticon on walking away from the pringles emoticon

Much success to you towards your goals to better health and fit you! emoticon emoticon

Happy New Year to you and yours!

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I am back but time flies

Saturday, December 28, 2013

I cannot belive how much time has past since I was last here. Over a year.. Have I lost weight? Nope. I put on a few pounds in fact.
It is ok though as I want to look to the future and not the past.

A lot has changed in my life in the last year. I moved away for a new start near london. Things did not work out so I am staying with my family again. Early next year I intend to move back to Brighton and make it work this time.
Can you beleive I started a gym membership there, and in 3 months I went once..... Yes once. I actually love the gym but for some reason I had no motivation when I was there.

Lately I have been self loathing when I look in the mirror. My chin seems to have grown 3 times lol. I snap chat with my friends and it is embarassing 'for me'
I have no energy, and I get out of breath quite easily now. I have to do something about it. I am going to be 34 next year and it is time to start living.

With being over weight often comes low self esteem also.
It is hard to see myself as attractive. I don't think I am ugly, yet I don't think I am handsome either.
My best mate is extremly good looking and I get jellous sometimes :) If he comes clubbing with me he seems to get attention even though he is the straight one lol.
One of the many many reasons I would liek to lose weight is I have been told by many, they think I will be quite handsome once I slim.
I know its superficial but let's be honest we all want to be attractive emoticon

Well today I have told myself that tomorrow I will start my healthy eating. I am going to follow Paul Mckenna I can Make You Thin again. It has worked well for me in the past.
Tonight I thought I would go out with a bang and cooked the family belly pork and loads and loads of roast potatoes. Was lovely.

Anyway I am going to follow the Mckenna hypnosis cd as well. That helps with losing weight and self esteem etc.

Not really sure why I made this blog but felt right.

So what are my goals?
To get back to Brighton asap next year. This will mean finding a job and home again.
To get Fit.
To lose around 8 -10 stone in pounds that is 110-140 lbs I think.
Most of all to feel happy in myself..

I know it will take time but I need to start.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AKPIPER 12/29/2013 6:01AM

    Good luck with your goals, new spark friend emoticon

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