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The Solution is Simple

Tuesday, September 09, 2014

“What would you do if someone did that to me?” my daughter asked across the dinner table last night.

“The emotional part of me would go find him and shoot him,” I said. “But then his troubles would be over and mine would be just beginning.”

We were discussing the topic du jour, the video of Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice knocking his wife unconscious in an elevator recently and how the NFL “didn’t realize it was that serious until they saw the video.” Minimizing abuse in any form and saying you didn’t realize it was “that serious” is like being “a little pregnant.”

So Roger Goodell and the powers that be, reached in their bag, pulled out a “do-over,” fell on their collective swords, uttered mea culpa’s about how they had “got it wrong,” suspended Rice indefinitely and his team fired him. A month ago, when all of this came to light, and Rice was charged with a felony, Rice was suspended for two games. His general manager Ozzie Newsome stood behind him at the time. Newsome spoke of how much respect he had for Rice. Yesterday Newsome was “unavailable” for the press conference that announced Rice’s suspension and firing from the Ravens. The price Rice paid in the court system for knocking his then fiancé damn near into oblivion? He was placed in a diversion program.

Okay, we could sit here all day talking about how wrong this is. What’s the answer? It’s really simple and it’s something you and I have total and complete control over. I want to preface my solution by telling you there are not many people who are bigger sports fans than I am. (I even watch hockey!)The solution is to quit supporting any sport that tolerates and by tolerating that means to me condones or is an apologist for, any illegal activity. Partner abuse, steroid abuse, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, you-pick-em…. Any sport that starts the fog machine and begins to blow smoke up targeted orifices does not deserve our support. Quit buying tickets, merchandise, and write to sponsors. Tell them that if they continue to advertise with venues that approve illegal and heinous activities you will quit purchasing their products. Have NFL Sunday ticket? Call Direct TV and tell them NFL commissioner, Rodger Goodell needs to go. They get enough calls, they’ll listen.

Ahhhhhhhhh you are not a sports fan. Ahhhhhhhhhh, you don’t get involved.

I’ll leave you with the commercial form the 1970’s that centered on voter registration:

“Vote and the choice is yours. Don’t vote and the choice is theirs.”

This issue isn’t so much about Ray Rice, though he finally received a portion of the penalty he deserved. This is about the NFL and how they think they can do what they choose to do because, well because they are the NFL.

Show them they aren’t.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IMEMINE1 9/15/2014 5:36AM

    emoticon emoticon

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NASFKAB 9/10/2014 9:11AM

  its sad that a famous person can get away with anything I like your idea of boycotting the sponsors

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MORTICIAADDAMS 9/9/2014 9:37PM

    The video was truly horrible. They didn't seem to care when they saw him toss her unconscious body around like a sack of potatoes. Just when they saw him punch her in the face. The sad part to me is she stayed with him and makes excuses for his abominable behavior. He's a thug. She's an idiot.

And if you recall, Kobe Bryant raped a young girl. He paid her off and is still everyone's golden boy.

It's disgusting.

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WORLDSERIES11 9/9/2014 2:48PM

    emoticon emoticon

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ATGOALWT 9/9/2014 11:42AM

  It doesn't surprise me that his punishment in court was a slap on the wrist. I'm old enough to know that wealthy and famous people get a different justice system from the average guy on the street. At least I am glad that today there are cameras out there that show the truth otherwise his money would of bought the damage control people who would of put a different spin on what happened in the media and he would have never been fired. Grateful for cameras and DNA today who tell us the truth. I'm sure the girlfriend was already paid off so she doesn't sue and drag this in the courts.

Interesting blog today.

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SANDRALEET 9/9/2014 9:57AM

    In any walk of life is abuse One is no better then the other fames or not poor or rich One of the biggest problems we got

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LOVINGKATE 9/9/2014 9:28AM

  I'm not a real big sports fan but I do like to watch football. When I heard about Rice being fired I was so excited. It's about time, now fire the rest that are so blind about the abuse women face from players that think they are above all else. Abuse is a topic that makes my skin crawl. I know if I were a judge, men would fear me. I'm here to tell you, I would be so tough on them they'd wished they were in hell instead my court room. Any abuse is wrong!!!! I don't care who does it.. Thanks for sharing your thoughts John.

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The Beauty of Deadlines

Monday, September 08, 2014

I don't care for them. I never have. I like roaming the wide open spaces and letting things happen as they happen. Throwing caution to the wind and all that stuff. But, I'd been fooling with the project I recently completed for close to 3 years and this little voice kept following me around telling me to finish it.Maybe nagging me would be a better choice of words? It wasn't that I'd lacked motivation or inspiration. Maybe, it was a deficit of perspiration?

I have a friend who makes a living managing other peoples projects. She's awfully good at it. We happened to be Skyping a few weeks ago and she asked me how my project was coming along and I hemmed and hawed and generally tried to change the subject. She asked a few more questions and said:

"It should be ready to be completed in 2 weeks based on what you told me. " That would have been last Saturday, September 6.

"Set yourself a deadline, clear the deck and go for it."

So I did. I promised myself the project would be completed in two weeks time. It took a lot of focus, dedication and some maneuvering to not only keep my commitment but to make sure all the other stuff got done too. I finished a day early.

I'm no different than you are. I have a bag of excuses, that sound like reasons, that I carry around with me and pull them out when it is convenient to back away form something.

Lost in this world of rewarding half baked efforts and feeble excuses is the soap and water of success - hard work and determination. My dad was fond of saying that if it didn't pinch a bit it wast worth the effort. I woke up a bit earlier than normal and stayed up later than normal. I'm neither preaching or complaining but simply observing that when you begin to spend too much time with the Stinkin' Thinkers" you start acting like them

Sometime Friday afternoon, after I received notification that my project had been accepted and uploaded, I sat back in my chair and felt this amazing sense of accomplishment and self satisfaction. It felt good. Maybe it wasn't plowing the North 40 or completing an addition to my house, but it proved to me at least one thing:

Deadlines arent to bad at all.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NASFKAB 9/9/2014 12:25AM

  awesome job completing the deadline

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CARTOONB 9/8/2014 11:00PM

    Congratulations! I'm on Chapter 2!

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REGILIEH 9/8/2014 10:18PM

    emoticon

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MOBYCARP 9/8/2014 7:58PM

    There's a saying, "If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would ever get done." That might be a bit of an overstatement, but there is a grain of truth in it.

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CHRISTINEBWD 9/8/2014 6:37PM

    I think projects that I am completely in charge of, and I am doing all on my own, are great to have deadlines. However, my current project involves others and I have found I have to be flexible when I am depending on others.

emoticon On your project being complete! :)

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JENNY888 9/8/2014 4:29PM

    Congratulations on finishing your project. I know how good that must fee. Awesome.

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IFDEEVARUNS2 9/8/2014 1:54PM

    Awesome - can't wait to read it.
That's a great friend to have.

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MORTICIAADDAMS 9/8/2014 1:32PM

    I like your friend. She sounds great. My kind of person. I wish she were here to keep me on the straight and narrow too. You are very fortunate.

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DRAGON-CHICK 9/8/2014 12:25PM

    Thanks, I really needed this!!!

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SANDRALEET 9/8/2014 12:17PM

    I get every thing done early

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LOVINGKATE 9/8/2014 12:13PM

  Good Morning John. Congrats on finishing your project. I don't care for deadlines either.
How ever, they do keep me on track or focused which every you choose. We need them other wise, for my self anyway, I would procrastinate. Some times we just need someone to push us in the right direction. Sounds like you had that person. Good for you.
Have a great Monday John. God bless.
I don't have a Kindle other wise I would read your book and give you feedback.

Comment edited on: 9/8/2014 12:15:15 PM

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Project Completed

Saturday, September 06, 2014

Many of you are aware that I've been MIA here at Spark for the past two weeks or so. I've been working on a project that's been one of those elusive priorities of mine for some time and I am pleased to announce that the project is complete. Once I set myself a deadline and made that deadline a public one, it pushed me towards getting finished.

Well, we crossed our finish line around 6PM last night. I cant tell you the deep sense of satisfaction I felt when I was able to look at what I've accomplished. But without many people in my life offering me encouragement and support along the way I may not have finished. Each of you is part of that community of people who've been part of this journey with me. Outside of my wife and kids, you are the first community I am announcing the completion of my project to.

(This is like being in middle school and passing notes in study hall.)


Love you all

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LOVINGKATE 9/8/2014 11:36AM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon
I do not have a Kindle so unable to read but I feel you are an awesome writer and maybe someday a book I can hold in my hand will be written.
God bless John

Comment edited on: 9/8/2014 11:40:22 AM

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JUMPINJULIE 9/7/2014 10:10PM

    Congrats Way to go.

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SNOOPYLINKOS 9/7/2014 10:39AM

    Congrats! Looking forward to reading it. It's a beautiful lazy Sunday with a glass of ice tea, comfy chair out under the deep blue sky and your book. emoticon

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TRISTAROSE 9/7/2014 6:39AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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NASFKAB 9/7/2014 12:41AM

  great job completing your goal all the best

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CARTOONB 9/6/2014 8:54PM

    Got it!! Looking forward to reading it!!!!!

Congratulations on completing your goal. I'm proud of you!

Comment edited on: 9/6/2014 8:56:03 PM

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EDWARDS1411 9/6/2014 6:36PM

    emoticon emoticon m

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SATCHMO99 9/6/2014 5:54PM

    ATGOALWT, I can read Kindle books on my mobile phone - if you have the option to download apps on your phone you can download the free Kindle app.

Good luck, John, so many people say they're going to write a book but never get around to it.

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ATGOALWT 9/6/2014 12:53PM

  I read the introduction and I liked it. I always liked your writing skills. I would buy it to read more if I had a kindle but I don't. I buy a lot of books on Amazon each year as I love books but unfortunately will miss yours. I wish you lots of luck with it and hope the 99 cents turns into thousands for you. Love the design of the book cover.

Best of luck with it! emoticon

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MORTICIAADDAMS 9/6/2014 12:32PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SANDRALEET 9/6/2014 12:16PM

    emoticon

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HEALTHIER-VICKI 9/6/2014 12:09PM

    That's fantastic John. I read the preview section allowed but I don't have a kindle so couldn't read it all. But congratulations on a job well done. emoticon

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TRIPLE_EMME 9/6/2014 9:43AM

    emoticon

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DRAGON-CHICK 9/6/2014 9:39AM

    Congrats!!! SO happy for you!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon


(I bought it - I love to support a fellow writer when I can afford it.)


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KABMPH 9/6/2014 9:31AM

    Congratulations!!

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ONEKIDSMOM 9/6/2014 9:20AM

    emoticon Three principles I can get behind!

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REGILIEH 9/6/2014 9:06AM

    YEA!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Anne

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GARDENCHRIS 9/6/2014 8:45AM

    emoticon

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Who's Number 1?

Friday, August 29, 2014

I was looking through some of my old notebooks the other day and I ran across something someone told me a few years ago. They said that no matter what type of work you did, the most important aspect of your life was that you have to be your number one client.



I guess that sounded nice at the time because I wrote it down and forgot about it until now.

I guess the world sees it as being elfish at times, choosing the gym or a salad over hanging with friends or ingesting a load of fried chicken .

I received word last evening that a friend died suddenly while on vacation with his wife. He had a massive heart attack. We talked a few weeks ago and he told me "Yeah.......... I gotta get back in shape and start eating right. Maybe after Labor Day."

You have to be you number one client

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUMPINJULIE 9/7/2014 10:09PM

    I'm so sorry for your loss.

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BEAUTY_WITHIN 9/2/2014 6:03PM

    I'm sorry :( Why do we always put stuff like this off?

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DOLLIE6 8/30/2014 3:17PM

    sorry for your loss.

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LISALGB 8/29/2014 8:58PM

    I am sorry about your friend. But, what a lesson to all of us. Thank you for sharing this.
Blessings!


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AJDOVER1 8/29/2014 6:18PM

    I've never considered you elfish, John.



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FORMYDARLINGS 8/29/2014 3:31PM

   

Take these things to heart John and so must we all. Nothing is for certain but taking care of number 1 is the best gift you can give to everyone including yourself. Thanks for the reminder.

I am so sorry about your friend. It does come as a surprise for a minute until we realize that shoulda, coulda has taken place. Hope your friend's passing serves to remind you of how precious our lives are.
Blessings to you and prayer for you and your friend and his family.


Gini

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CARTOONB 8/29/2014 3:18PM

    Wow! That's an eye-opener. Thanks.

I'm gonna go be elfish. emoticon

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LOVINGKATE 8/29/2014 2:07PM

  So sorry about your friend. We do need to take THIS day and live it as if it were our last.
God gives us only one day at a time. We do need to put ourselves first before we can help another. Thanks so much for sharing and have a great weekend. Will use as my mantra today. Hugs, Kathy

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MORTICIAADDAMS 8/29/2014 12:29PM

    Oh my! How terrible that these were his last words to you. Sorry about your friend.

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CHRISTINEBWD 8/29/2014 10:48AM

    I am sorry to hear about your friend. And even sorrier that he thought he still had time to turn things around health wise.

It seems to me that everyday we are all making choices concerning our own health. We all need to put our health as priority #1.

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HEALTHIER-VICKI 8/29/2014 9:59AM

    I'm sorry for your loss.
We always think we'll have tomorrow or the next day to make changes. It's time to do that today. And make it count. emoticon

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NASFKAB 8/29/2014 9:16AM

  sorry about your friend we must be our no 1 client

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REGILIEH 8/29/2014 8:24AM

    So sorry about your friend but it does put things in perspective.

I hope you have a good weekend.

Anne

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SANDRALEET 8/29/2014 7:59AM

    putting aside helps not We all do that

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ONEKIDSMOM 8/29/2014 7:44AM

    emoticon So sorry for your loss. May the sorrow turn to strength and resolve... you ARE your #1 client!

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LWILKINS60 8/29/2014 7:03AM

    This will be my mantra today!

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DRAGON-CHICK 8/29/2014 6:59AM

    Oh man! I'm sorry to hear that about your friend.
And I keep saying similar things.
Time to actually DO, huh?


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"Where Have You Been"

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Busy, lol, which has been a good thing and a bad thing.

My mothers condition continues to worsen. Her Alzheimer's is following a natural progression. The medication she was on caused her severe lower intestinal problems plus a severe skin rash, so it was removed about 3 months ago. During that time she has tried to get out of her bed and her wheel chair unassisted and fallen on the floor. They now have her on more monitors then they have at the Pentagon. Her doctor is trying a medication patch which she is hoping slows things down a bit. If it produces the same side effects as the oral medication then, as the doctor puts it, "It wont be long." She has a permanent catheter because of her bladder infections and is confined to a wheel chair because one of her falls caused a broken pelvis. The doctors say that usually when something like that occurs in the elderly it is 6 months to a year before they pass away. I've been trying to spend as much time as I can talking to her because I can tell her memory fades a bit each day and sometimes I think she is not sure who I am.

So that's the bad news.

The good news is I have spent a lot of time on a project in the past few weeks that will be ready on or about September 6. It's consumed a lot of my time and if you care to know more about it drop me a Spark Mail. I'd go into more detail but every time I talk about anything related to my coaching or consulting or writing, someone or a group of someones reports me and then I get one of those nice Spark Mails asking me to refrain from such activities.

I have been exercising regularly and while I have not lost any weight during the past 3 weeks I have not gained any weight either. I am tracking at least two meals daily and am careful not to go too far over board.

Thank you for all of your love and support. Hopefully after next Saturday when my project is finished I'll have more time to blog on a regualr basis.

Keep Sparkin'

I am!!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUMPINJULIE 9/7/2014 10:08PM

    I'm so sorry to here about your Mom sending prayers.

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ANDREWS_MOM 8/30/2014 7:48PM

    I'm so sorry about your mom, John. My prayers are with you & your family.

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ONEKIDSMOM 8/28/2014 7:50PM

    emoticon Nice to see your smiling blog! Sorry about your mom... it's hard... been there with my dad. My mom left while I still lived half a continent away, and dad followed her about three years later, but I was back in time to be in on seeing his decline. Like I said, hard, even when you are "prepared".

So, hugs, and thoughts and prayers for you and yours, John!

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AJDOVER1 8/28/2014 6:19PM

    Good to see you, John. You and your family are in my prayers. I hope your Mom is comfortable and safe where she is now.

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IFDEEVARUNS2 8/28/2014 11:56AM

    Sorry to hear about your mom. emoticon

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HEALTHIER-VICKI 8/28/2014 11:42AM

    It's heartbreaking when your mother has alzheimers. My stepmom had it and hers got to the point where she went back into her childhood. She didn't remember her children or step children at all.
I hope you'll remain strong and get thru it all ok. emoticon

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MORTICIAADDAMS 8/28/2014 10:12AM

    I'm so sorry to hear that about your mother. I went through that with my grandma. It broke my heart.

I hope your new project is very successful. It sounds exciting.

Sounds like you are doing well on the diet front too. Excellent!

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INBRAZILFORNOW 8/28/2014 9:22AM

    Praying for you and your mom.

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INBRAZILFORNOW 8/28/2014 9:22AM

    Praying for you and your mom.

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PEGGY11 8/28/2014 8:34AM

    Sorry about your mom John, Such a terrible disease to contend with for all involved. Stay strong and motivated. Your loving wife must be a great support for you at this time. hugs and love.

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SANDRALEET 8/28/2014 7:47AM

    I now how you feel I have a husband and mom in that condition

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TRISTAROSE 8/28/2014 6:13AM

    So sorry about your mom ... emoticon

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DRAGON-CHICK 8/28/2014 4:59AM

    She is so luck to have you!

emoticon

What? People ask you to not put certain things in your own blogs? Ask them to stop reading your blogs! Grrr..... _I_ would like you to share what things you feel passionate about!


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WORLDSERIES11 8/28/2014 1:20AM

    emoticon

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NASFKAB 8/28/2014 12:59AM

  sorry about your Mom its so sad all the best but if you need to vent am there will send you an email soon will spark mail do?

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CARTOONB 8/27/2014 11:58PM

    I don't know what to say. But know that I'm here to listen if that's what you need.

I am intrigued about your project. An e-mail will be sent to you shortly!

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REGILIEH 8/27/2014 11:57PM

    So sorry about your mother!

I believe I have told you before that I see to my 93 year old uncle who has Alzheimer's. My husband and I moved him in with us for a year but then for his own safety we moved him to a facility but he loved being with all the people and is really for his age physically most of the time things are good. He had started to forget how to swallow and would aspirate and then get pneumonia but thankfully it has been over a year since that happened. He still loves to dance and is a sweetheart. I know it must be so heartbreaking for you and your family. My father-in-law died with it too but he did not last as long and got very combative at the end, I so hope my uncle does not do that. It is such a horrible disease.

I'm excited about your project and will look forward to finding out about it.

Anne

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HDHAWK 8/27/2014 10:53PM

    I'm sorry to hear about your mom John. I went through the same with my former FIL. I haven't been here much either with the beginning of the school year I've been swamped too. That and having a brand new grandson takes a little more of my time. My son gets married on the 6th so that will be a good day for both of us.

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BEAUTY_WITHIN 8/27/2014 9:31PM

    I'm sorry about everything with your mom. My family went through that with my gramdpa, and now with my grandma as well. I'm doing the Alzheimer's walk again this year to help raise money for research.

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TATTER3 8/27/2014 9:21PM

    So sorry about your mother. That's such a frustrating thing to deal with . Glad you have talents to distract. Be blessed and keep Sparkin'!

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