Friday, August 30, 2013
The summer is dwindling down. It's been a sad summer for me, I am looking forward to a brand new season, the season of change. I love autumn.
I've been all over the place with my "healthy diet" efforts. Losing the same 3 lbs., several times. very frustrating. However, I am proud of my fitness accomplishments. I even added the Total Gym to my routine.
I have mom on my mind a lot, I really miss her. Before her memory went, we were very close, I confided in her about my problems, she would give me advice and encouragement.
I am trying to take better care of myself, what she, unfortunately, didn't do.
It sure isn't easy, but if fighting "for me" everyday "is" the journey, then that's what I'll do.
I have a son to think about.
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." ~ Dr. Seuss
I aim to make this autumn a much more productive season. Have a wonderful Labor Day weekend, friends!
Let's journey on together!
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
“Our lives a series of defining moments, strung together by passing time. Surrender fully to this moment, because it is not the moment itself that defines us, but how we choose to live in it.” -Jill Pendley
I've been thinking about defining moments lately. Those moments that bring out my true nature, or has changed my life drastically.
So far, these are some of the defining moments that have changed my life forever:
Moved out of my parents home.
Became a wife.
Became a mother.
I got sober after 30 years of drinking.
Became a caretaker for my mom for a short while.
I had to make the decision to place mom in a nursing home.
Some of these events were positive and some were negative. Some I didn't like what it revealed about me. Still, I'm grateful for them because they taught me a lot about myself.
Lately though, with my mother's passing, I feel numb and I feel lost, as if I'm in limbo. I know it's part of grieving but if this is another defining moment, then I don't like what it's revealing about me.
I find myself with no motivation, binge eating again, and the worst part is that I don't care enough to do something about it.
I know that I have to snap out of this and I will eventually...
And this blog post has already helped me feel better, because it served to remind me of all the changes I have gone through and survived.
"I wouldn't trade any of the rotten times. They're vital to defining who you are and what you want." -Anatole France
Saturday, May 11, 2013
Remember those days when together we would cook,
Or when we shared the latest mystery book?
We'd watch a game show or play a board game,
It‘s a shame that things don‘t stay the same.
We laughed a lot, and shed some tears too.
We’ve had our ups and downs, as mothers and daughters often do,
But through it all, you’ve been there for me,
I hope I haven’t failed you - that someday you’ll see.
I treasure that you're still with me, even though you can't remember,
In your eyes I still can see, love - like a glowing ember.
So I write this to thank you for your loving ways,
May the Lord protect and comfort you for the rest of your days.
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