Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Well, today is the first day of my classes. I finally received the syllabus for one of them and it looks completely do-able. Not too bad. Just have to wait and see how the other one shapes up.
I had a rough start to the morning which has had me down. I got mad and yelled at my daughter because I caught her lying to me. She told me she made her lunch, I asked follow up questions about it, she lied some more, and then it turns out she didn't make it, she was going to buy it despite there being a house full of groceries. I don't know how long she's been doing this. Part of her retort was that her dad gave her money for Christmas to spend anyway she wanted to without being judged. There's a lot of things I don't like about the situation and the lesson that message imparts. I guess it's not worth hashing out here but needless to say, I wasn't happy about her response and deflection away from the initial issue of lying and I wasn't happy about it being inferred that I was judgmental about the way she wants to spend money by my co-parent. My job is to teach her to act responsibly and I am failing. I cried a bit on the way to work. Some days I really hate being a parent. That may be awful to say, but sometimes I just feel so ill-equipped.
Otherwise, my week is going well enough. I've been eating well. On Monday I did a zumba class plus a C25K run and my old leg injury flared up. Yikes! I told myself to dial it back. The last thing I need is another 2 months off. Yesterday the leg was still aching a small bit (dully) and so I did NOTHING, other than my walks across campus (job related). Today I have no pain at all. I won't have time to exercise today because of my classes after work but I will be doing more walking around campus. Tomorrow I'll hit the gym again and see what happens. No more doubling up on high impact, though. Hopefully as my muscles grow stronger, this will become less of an issue.
It's hump day. Hoping the rest of the week is a little sunnier.
Friday, January 10, 2014
The picky part of me doesn't like some of the wording on this picture but I appreciate the essence of what it says. Thank you, Spark Friends for lighting the spark in me.
It's been a pretty successful week. I didn't go out of calorie range once since my last post and I exercised every day. One of those days the exercise was via "Just Dance" on Wii with my daughter so it was kind of a light day but still, I got myself moving and this week was a big improvement over the previous week.
I've been doing C25K except for one day at the Y when I did 1/4 mile length walk/run intervals instead of timed intervals. The reason for this is because I got a new waterproof phone case and my headphone jack couldn't fit without an adaptor, so there was no way to listen to music and the C25K app's little timer to tell me "begin running/start walking". I've since located the adaptor
Last night, I went to hip hop class at the Y. The regular teacher was sick so we had a Zumba teacher substitute. This is one of the teachers I avoid because she moves way too fast and her routines are very hard to follow. Don't get me wrong, she's a nice lady. She's very friendly, smiles and is energetic, but instead of constructing the routines to her songs with repeated sections of the same movements she always switches moves up every couple of seconds at a very high pace and it's difficult to discern a pattern to the movements. You'd have to be a regular and go to her class a few times to know what to do. A lot of the people actually quit the class partway through but I just kept in place and tried to keep moving, even though I might not have been following her exact moves. She was downright frenetic . I really didn't feel like I got a good workout since most of the time I was just half-a$#ing it while trying to figure out what the heck she was doing. So afterwards I went to the indoor track to walk a bit and then ran a half mile. I wanted to try for the full mile but my will power and steam just were not there.
Tonight my daughter and I will have to figure out a way to get some exercise in. She usually goes swimming while I go to a class/weights/track. However, something is going on with the pool. She swam 5 days in a row this week (which she's done before) and twice she came home with her skin inflamed and red. I think it's because of the pool chemicals. I told her she has to scale back to every other day because her skin gets dried and painful to the touch. We'll have to see how this plays out. Chlorine isn't the best thing to be exposed to but I hope she isn't developing a sensitivity. It would really be a disappointment to her if she couldn't swim often.
I will be taking 2 classes this semester and they start in a week and a half. I'm just hoping and praying that once they start I can "keep it together" with all the other stuff going on. After this semester, I'll be halfway done with the degree. At that point I can be on the lookout for other job opportunities. I like my current job, can't complain, but I definitely am stuck in the chain without upward movement in a town this size. In the meantime, my current boss is a good mentor and when I am ready to move on, I'll be sitting pretty. Just gotta keep chipping away at this degree---even if I really hate school (don't tell my daughter I said that).
This weekend, I will hopefully be delivering the last remaining hamster (woohoo!). What an adventure that has been! Besides a bit of housecleaning I need to take care of, it should remain a relaxing couple of days. Hope everyone has a good one!
Friday, January 03, 2014
Yesterday I read the following piece somewhere online. I honestly can't remember where I read it but I copied and pasted in an email to myself. I apologize if I ripped it off anyone on this site--please take credit if so. I am pasting it here so I know where it is and can come back to it periodically. I think it's good to be reminded every so often to take baby steps and remain in the moment so as to not get discouraged in my quest for self-improvement.
JUST FOR TODAY: I will live through this day only. I will not brood about yesterday or obsess about tomorrow. I will not set far-reaching goals or try to overcome all of my problems at once. I know that I can do something for 24 hours that would overwhelm me if I had to keep it up for a lifetime.
JUST FOR TODAY: I will be happy. I will not dwell on thoughts that depress me. If my mind fills with clouds, I will chase them away and fill it with sunshine.
JUST FOR TODAY: I will accept what is. I will face reality. I will correct those things that I can correct and accept those I cannot.
JUST FOR TODAY: I will improve my mind. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration. I will not be a mental loafer.
JUST FOR TODAY: I will make a conscious effort to be agreeable. I will be kind and courteous to those who cross my path, and I'll not speak ill of others. I will improve my appearance, speak softly, and not interrupt when someone else is talking.
JUST FOR TODAY: I will refrain from improving anybody but myself.
JUST FOR TODAY: I will do something positive to improve my health. If I'm a smoker, I'll quit. If I am overweight, I will eat healthfully -- if only for today. And not only that, I will get off the couch and take a brisk walk, even if it's only around the block.
JUST FOR TODAY: I will gather the courage to do what is right and take the responsibility for my own actions.
Thursday, January 02, 2014
Since Thanksgiving, I can term the last month or so as nothing less than self abuse with the amount and quality of food I've eaten. I've gained back some weight, but so what. I'm back on track again and eager to see how this year pans out for me. I have a friend's wedding at the end of May and a cruise in July so I have some firm mini-goals/deadlines for weight loss already.
After being off exercise due to my leg, I decided to re-start the C25K program to slowly build back up my endurance again. So far so good. This injury was a real learning opportunity about not pushing so hard. So far, running again has been a real breeze, aerobically speaking. These first couple of weeks have been really really easy to breath through. My worry has been more about wear and tear on the legs. Instead of my usual running at the indoor track at the YMCA, I am bracing against the cold and running in my neighborhood. The last time I did that, I was already well into my injury and it HURT. Since taking two months off to heal, I have been shocked that I don't hurt at ALL after running outdoors on the pavement!!! This is so very encouraging. I'm very very pleased. I remember well last year and then two years before that when I began C25K and even running 60 second spurts was just intolerable! It makes me happy to look back and really realize the difference in my ability and outlook on running. Every time I think about "pushing it", I keep telling myself "slow and steady". I am so very very grateful to be back at it and able to move again.
The holidays are over. It's back to spinach smoothies and tracking calories. All is well and looking up!
Wednesday, December 04, 2013
Just blogging to make an effort to keep updated. This is my life right now while finding homes for these critters. About half have been spoken for.
Trying to make time for any exercise at all has been extremely challenging lately, as well as been eating properly. I've been eating the right foods, but really having troubles with amounts. I've been tracking just fine, but I've been feeling much hungrier. So I'll have a second helping of nuts, or a third helping of squash or brussel sprouts. Even go for a peanut butter sandwich. Half the prob is my mind, but the other half feels like a rebound effect after being so strict for so long. Part of me also knows that once I've been cleared for full exercise, it will be easier. Not going to blow the calories I've worked off by eating. Fingers crossed, will get full clearance in two weeks!!! Hooray! I managed to get out to the Y and swim some during this down time. One night I was lucky enough to get there just in time for a water aerobics class! It was a good class. The structure of it was certainly welcome but I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss my zumba.
My goal to hit before the end of the year is to get up 30 minutes earlier in the morning and get out in the pitch dark cold. Next semester will be a bear and this will be integral to fitting my running time into my day. The time of reckoning has come. Even if I can't make myself exercise during it, at first, I need to form the habit. I need to get up, put my clothes on and go out. Once used to it, exercise will be the easier part of it (for me). Struggling against the desire to hibernate under the covers is the main challenge for me :) My doc cleared me for walking, as long as I keep it under two miles so this is what my plan is for the next little bit.
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