Monday, November 04, 2013
I was up in Perth for the weekend... beforehand I wasn't so sure how that would work out eatingwise, you know, not being in control of cooking and stuff. I left ALL my boys behind and drove up with my in laws for my sis in laws GP graduation. I felt a bit like a teenager: sitting on the back seat watching movies on a portable DVD player, getting pocket money from my mum in law cause I ran out of cash, camping on the floor at my sis in laws place...
Well, it worked out really good. I ate more than usual, especially more fruit, yet I wasn't tempted to eat any sweet things besides fruit. At one point my mind was playing with the thought of having a coke, but it wasn't hard to put that thought back in it's proper place. It felt good to be in control!!!!!
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
I am doing so well. I don't know nor do I care (much) if or if not I have continued to loose weight. I feel so much better, fuller and satisfied. Of course there are things that don't go right 100%, like eating a bit too much or nibbling a bit throughout the day, yet, I don't have those stinking cravings anymore. I walk past the soda bottles in the supermarket and don't even start thinking: "One, once in a while, is ok". Okay, I have to admit that the thought tries to form yet it isn't like a battle in my head no more. It is SO liberating, so freaking liberating.
And you know, the funny thing is, that when I was at my heaviest I often wished to be skinny and THEN to be able to eat butter and full fat cheese and drink full fat milk. I fantasised about a skinnier me cutting off a slice of wonderful cheese accompanied by fresh raw cow's milk, inclusive the cream. Yet here I am, not skinny, not even wanting to be skinny, but healthy, and fit and in shape, and achieving this slowly WHILE eating those things, and drinking that milk. I can't tell you enough how satisfying it is to spread real butter on my freshly baked wholegrain sourdough bread. I'm still so bamboozled that this is happening to me. Saying "no" to a yummy looking cake doesn't feel like this huuuuge mental battle anymore... at least not at present. I am full on healthy fats, my portions are significantly smaller and generally I eat a lot less throughout the day, even though I nibble here and there on fruit or nuts or the like.
I got rid of many food stuff I didn't want to eat anymore, like light margarine and gave away some stuff as well, like a big tin of Milo. If I fancy a hot chocolate I mix some cocoa with honey and hot milk, doesn't take much longer then trying to get Milo dissolved anyways. We only have a little remnant of shop bought sweets left in the house, don't want my boys to be "weirdos" or go crazy with sweets once I'm not around, yet I try to make them absolutely happy with the healthy desserts I make myself, which often happens to be fruit and yogurt lately.
Now that I'm rocking this ship foodwise I struggle a little with the exercise side of things though. I am going to the gym on mondays, and walking the dog most days, yet I know and feel I need to get back into my exercise routine, getting challenged. Today I started the day with a workout video and life seemed so much better and much more manageable (despite offspring having meltdowns left and right)... ok, it being a GORGEOUS day and jolly warm which might have something to do with it as well.
And isn't it funny how your tastebuds change as you grow (older)???
Even a couple months, no , weeks ago, I would not have enjoyed this sandwich:
Sourdough bread, butter, dark green lettuce, lacto-fermented beets, smokede salmon and cheese.
My sourdough bread still slightly ressembles a brick yet it's actually quite good, inf act my three year old wahts to eat it plain, with nothing on it... I couldn't do that, but that's how he likes it best... weird fella... must come after his dad!!!!
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
That about sums it up. It still feels utterly wrong to eat butter, full fat cream or cheese and use chicken with the skin on, but boy, I feel good, liberated and not craving. My portions size has decreased and not that I planned it that way, the fat I consume now just makes me full and keeps me full longer.
Last night I made pizza (and hands down I think it was the best pizza I have EVER made) yet after eating 1/8th of it and a salad I was full and did not want any more... I felt so utterly like not "me", i mean, the "me" I've known for so long was ALWAYS hungry and ONE piece of pizza would have NEVER ever satisfied her. Yet here I was, satisfied and full. We had a friend over for dinner as well and he brought a shop bought dessert and normally the smell of sugar gets me into the "Struggling and fighting against" mode, yet this time, nada... nothing... I didn't want it at all, so I didn't eat it, which was a very liberating feeling.
I still struggle a little though with grazing throughout the day, a nut here, a date there a bit of an apple just because. Especially today. Boy, I was THE domestic goddess, I tell ya (I know, "humility" is my middle name, joking).
Besides doing the shopping this morning I made 2 big batches of applesauce, started making apple pectin and apple cider vinegar from the peels, washed and cleaned, froze or blended 5kg of strawberries (some ended up as chia jam sweetened with raw honey, my new favourite sweetener), roasted marrow bones and made beef broth out of them, roasted my first ever chicken with it's skin on (it still felt so very wrong doing this)... ou, and I also dehydrated tomatoes and turned them into tomato powder as well as made some dried apple rings.... and even better I managed to get the kitchen (mostly) clean again after it rather resembled the remains of a battlefield.
I loved looking at my shopping this morning: no processed foods at all (ok, I bought some bacon which had some funny sounding ingredients.... hmmm). I also found cheap minced meat from grass-fed cows and I found a new (to me) shop in town with is absolutely adorable and sells all sorts of flours, grains, spices and the like... boy, I'm such a sucker for spices nowadays...
Yesterday I went through my pinterest boards and deleted many of my pins: sugar loaded things, white flour goods or recipes that use processed foods. And it felt good to make a clear cut. I kept a couple of recipes for special occasions or as ideas to healthify some time, yet most of those absolutely yummy looking photos I just removed. Right now I look at these delicious looking creations and don't even want to try them, yet I know that rough times WILL come and then those things will look good and tempting.
Monday, October 21, 2013
I feel like I'm on a little "high" at present... my eating goes really well. I'm not even craving sweets, or processed foods, which comes really as a surprise. Also no coke... which is a super huge surprise. My skin is finally getting better. Ever sins starting on this journey in January I always still struggled with pimples and plotches... and finally it seems to get so much better. Aaaaaaand today I went to the gym for 2h and did two classes, "pump" (which I really enjoy) and "step" (which isn't really my gifting... I was all over the place just not where I was supposed to be).
Not only did I go to the gym but I motivated a friend to join me to do this "pump" class together, in fact every Monday from now on. Which is so great... doing something together is so much better then soldiering on alone. I haven't had much contact with that friend lately, our lives were just too busy, yet we're both so happy to do something together again at last.
And even better, later on I accidentally ran into her again in our one and only organic healthy food store in town and we discovered that foodwise we're on the same page as well: cutting out processed foods, sugar, white flour and the like. Tomorrow we'll meet for a walk at the beach... then we'll finally have time to catch up a bit (catching up while doing a pump class and almost collapsing is just not possible).
Yet I wouldn't be here without other friends either... even though I hadn't been active on Sparkpeople for quite some time ELEANORKR and I where keeping each other accountable... as much as a loose canon can be accountable.... yet without you my friend, I wouldn't be here!!!!
And then there are all you encouraging people out there... Meg, Wendy, Susie, RDEE.... so here's my conclusion: DOING THIS TOGETHER ROCKS!!!!!!
Yet, I am having some hiccups.... nibbling is still one of them... even though the last two days were much better... mainly because I felt sick in my tummy, not nausea sick, can't actually describe it...just not 100%... can't eat much (blessing in disguise??), don't even want to eat (and I ALWAYS want to eat usually).
Well, and on that note I will say good night and hit the sack... sleep is the best medicine after all, right????
Saturday, October 19, 2013
.. are always a hard challenge... often for me by Thursday all my good efforts start to crumble and by Saturday the walls are down. And yes, that silly nibbling monster is still around, yet it hasn't taken over!!!!! I have kept to eating healthy foods. I nibbled on dates and nuts, grapes and 2 apples. So, I am proud that I haven't even been tempted by my kid's gummy bears and the chocolates my hubby got given the other day. Yes, I haven't even been tempted, and that is a fantastic feeling and knowledge. Yet chocolate hasn't been totally out of my life. In fact, I decided to make it myself in various forms. So I made some coconut chocolates in icecube trays, sweetened with maple syrup. And I made hot chocolate, which is basically 1 teaspoon of honey/maple syrup and 1/2 tablespoon of cocoa... and hot milk of course. In fact I made a jar of it, basically an "instant" version and I felt rather clever. Isn't it weird that all my life I always had some sort of an instant chocolate drink like "Milo" or "Ovomaltine" yet it is so dang easy to make it from scratch... add some malt extract and you even have the malty taste of milo or ovomaltine.
Another thing I've made is a healthier version of "nutella"... I'm such a sucker for nutella... yet, I found a really nice substitute for it... I made some nutbutter, added some date paste, vanilla, cocoa and coconut milk... simple ingredients, great result. Now I just have to control myself, too much of a good thing is bad as well as we all know.
It's somehow a really great feeling to know, that the only processed food I ate all week was dinner two nights ago, which was tortellini... and I'm a sucker for tortellini too... and haven't figured out yet how to make them in a real food, wholegrain kind of healthy way. Ou well, now and then something not quite as healthy is quite alright with me... as long as "now and then" doesn't turn into "every day... three times".
So, summoning up, there is room for improvement, like MORE exercise (walking the dog doesn't really cut it for me), sticking to meal/snack times, no eating after dinner, YET it has been a good week and I'm utterly grateful to be back on track and 1.3kg down!!!
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