Friday, May 09, 2014
I have been on a long road. One that hopefully leads to a full recovery.
The long story is too long, so here's the abridged version:
I have had pain in one form or another, and most of this pain was unexplained. No doctor or specialist could explain it. At first, it was all over itching. Everywhere. I had migraines. I have never had migraines before. Those went away, and I had tingling and stinging in my hands and arms. It was so bad I could not type or write or open doors. I was totally disabled. Then my foot pain flared up so badly I could not walk.
I pursued each pain with a specialist. My foot pain is real, and I have been working on it with a podiatrist. I am slowly recovering and the last couple of weeks I have been able to work out. This is the first week I was able to work out all week, completing each workout.
I went to my doctor who has been with me during this crazy journey. She and I sat down and I cried. Just cried. I explained that all of these physical problems directly reflects a problem related to my parents or my childs health.
After a lot of discussion, we determined that my anxiety is out of control. I have always had some anxiety, but this is really making me sick.
I have been pursuing some remedies and I can see a big difference already. I feel a bit more focused and social. I am still having some pain. I got anxious today and my arms started stinging. I am developing tools to help me cope and get back to feeling normal. (whatever that is)
I hope to get back to my regular activities here and everywhere else. I have been tracking and participating here and there, just trying to get back into the groove of things.
I gained a lot of weight. I could not work out in all that pain. But I am 9 pounds down and really staying focused. Woohoo!
My journey is certainly not over or cured or whatever. I can see light, and I can accept what's going on. Here's to getting out of this funk!
Friday, September 06, 2013
I am feeling pretty good this week. It started off pretty scary.
I got news last week during my physical that I had a lump in my left breast. I had never felt it before and the doc assured me she was only being super cautious. I was ok with that for a little bit. I had to battle my stupid insurance company in order to get a mammo. They weren't really thrilled about it because I am not 40 yet. So irritating! No one in the mammo office or my doc's office could believe my insurance company's attitude. I had to fight for it, even though I am 5 weeks from being 40!
So, I finally had the mammo. All is clear. Nothing to report, thank GOD!
I feel so so relieved. Of course, all those "what ifs...." were haunting me. I kept looking at my boys and thinking about missing out on raising them. It was pretty terrible and difficult.
Thank GOD that is over.
My headaches are still lingering, fewer and farther now. I think the tension in my life has been tremendously cut. My boys new school is amazing and I am so grateful that I fought hard to get them out of the old school and into the new one. We went to the book fair and "Reading Roundup" at school last night and it was sooooo awesome! What a great school. The boys have all kinds of new friends. I am so relieved. I am also the new media center assistant for the second grade! I am so excited! I tutored at the last school and loved it. Now I get to help out the adorable second graders in the library!! Woohoo! I love books and kids! This is so exciting!
I have been working out like a mad woman the last month. I have finally lost 8 pounds. This week tho, nothing. No gain either, so that's good. And a miracle really. We went out of town to visit family and they always feed us like crazy. It was a good visit and kinda sad. My hubs two grandmothers are both in homes now and one house has to be cleaned out. It was sad to see the house empty.
No more chasing chickens with the boys and the dogs. No more shooting guns. Well, I don't shoot the guns. I use a compound bow. (In terms of the Walking Dead, I am much more likely to be Daryl than Rick.) I will miss all that fun.
She gave me her vanity. It's so special to me now!
I am eating much better too. I am really having to watch what I eat. My glucose was ok, not pre-diabetes but it's close enough to annoy me.
Today I am having lunch with a good friend and I having the salad. I can't wait to catch up with her!
I finished Buffy and well, started Angel. I really did not like that show as much as Buffy. Buffy's hard to compete with. I am now watching Supernatural and I loved that show but didn't see the lastest seasons so I am catching up.
Tomorrow is my four mile hike with my girlfriends! I love to catching up on their lives and being outside!
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
I am feeling WAY better than I was!
I have no answers, though. No one knows what really happened to me. I had headaches that took me out of commission. It was terrible. I have been to every specialist you can name. I have had every test/procedure you can imagine. No answers.
I think my headaches are a combo of sinus, allergies, and tension. Just a guess. I still have headaches, I woke up with one today. But it didn't kill me! Sometimes I have rougher days than others. Sometimes no headaches at all!
I have been working out this week and tracking my food. Seriously, I have not felt like doing anything, so these little steps are pretty big for me.
I have been walking with my BFF and a couple more friends every Saturday morning. We walk 3.5 to 4 miles every time. And each time it's a new greenway or trail. It's been awesome. This Friday I am walking 4 miles and then again on Sat in a new place. I am so thrilled!
I have my physical in a few weeks and I can't wait. I know, that's odd. But I can't wait. I still think my 40's are going to be awesome!
I have been cleaning my house like crazy while watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer on my iPad. Next I think I'll watch Angel. I am on season 6 of Buffy and I have such a crush on Spike.
The little dog we adopted a few month ago is doing awesome! He needs no surgery. He needed love and exercise. So I talk him walking some. He is a feisty little dude and all his hair is growing in! He gained 3 pounds. He's 12 pounds of feisty!
The boys are loving their new school. I am so thrilled. At first my little guy didn't love it and he had such a hard time adjusting. But now he is loving it. He starts allergy shots today. And instead of being all crazy nervous he said he couldn't wait to get them started. He wants to be well!
Well, I am off to get his room clean. Woohoo! NOT!
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