MAMADWARF   45,576
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MAMADWARF's Recent Blog Entries

October blog

Monday, October 13, 2014

remember when I had sunday check in's every week??? dang, me too! Its been awhile ! I do have some updates.

I am having knee replacement on October 21 and my whole reason is so I can start moving again. I am going to take the opportunity to reboot my eating and excercise program so i can get healthy again. I will keep you posted on that.

My family situation is beginning to settle down, thank goodness. I am still sad but not crying every day so PROGRESS. kady and art are talking and moving forward separatly. we are adjusting.

thanks for checking in and not giving up on me. I will be becoming more active again. very soon. Jan

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ENDUROVET 10/15/2014 4:36PM

    I'm sure surgery will be a big improvement in your comfort & mobility...

My cousin has painstakingly peeled off 20 lbs required by his surgeon & will hopefully have his knee replacement scheduled shortly - he's been in constant pain for years now, degenerative arthritis being his souvenir of a terrible ski accident 25 yrs ago. (One reason you'll never catch me on the ski slopes - the bindings failed to release, rupturing ALL the major ligaments in his knee!)

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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REMEMBER2BME 10/15/2014 6:15AM

    Thank you for taking the time to update us. It sounds like you are doing the best you can and are making good decisions. Hugs to you. Stay strong!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HOLLYS_NEW_LIFE 10/14/2014 1:05PM

    I'm glad you're sounding so positive. Knee replacement, that should help SOOO much! My mom had both of hers done, and I can't tell you the mobility she's found. She's VERY obese, and she's managed to drop a few just by being ABLE to more. I'm glad things are starting to kook up Jan. Love you girl! *HUGS*

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PJH2028 10/14/2014 10:54AM

    Yes.
emoticon

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TREASURINGLIFE 10/14/2014 10:07AM

    Good luck with the surgery...and prayers for continued progress for you and your family as you heal from the last few months.

- Michelle

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COLUMBINE2 10/14/2014 10:01AM

    I'll be thinking of you on Oct. 21 & during recovery...sending lots of healing energy your way. You'll recover great because you want to recover 100% & will DO what's required.
Your body can give all it's energy to healing or to fighting pain. Let the meds fight the pain so your body can dedicate itself 100% to healing. You'll be glad you did it that way.

Glad your kids are moving forward and you are, too. Very tough for you though.


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JITZUROE 10/14/2014 9:52AM

    Wow a BIG decision for your knee and mobility. This will be such a blessing for you, I can feel it!

I'm proud of you. I adore you. You are so much stronger than you realize...

Bren

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AAAACK 10/14/2014 1:19AM

    My dad had a knee replacement and he never regretted it, so I hope you feel the same way. I'm also glad that family dust is starting to settle. Stability helps so much. Hang in there, I'm pulling for you!

Maybe we can do Sunday check-ins again soon. I liked those.

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NEWBIRTH2014 10/13/2014 11:17PM

    Pleased to hear that you're making progress with your family situation. And when you have that upcoming knee surgery make sure you take it easy on yourself and follow thru with doctors orders.


Marie emoticon

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October blog

Monday, October 13, 2014

remember when I had sunday check in's every week??? dang, me too! Its been awhile ! I do have some updates.

I am having knee replacement on October 21 and my whole reason is so I can start moving again. I am going to take the opportunity to reboot my eating and excercise program so i can get healthy again. I will keep you posted on that.

My family situation is beginning to settle down, thank goodness. I am still sad but not crying every day so PROGRESS. kady and art are talking and moving forward separatly. we are adjusting.

thanks for checking in and not giving up on me. I will be becoming more active again. very soon. Jan

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GRACEISENUF 10/17/2014 8:24PM

    emoticon sent ya a goodie with a private note

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HGSGUY 10/15/2014 9:09AM

    Good luck with the knee surgery! My sister had her replaced a few weeks ago and is doing very well. The new knees they make now are really very good and a coworker that had his replaced in May said it was so worth it. He no longer uses the elevator, chooses the stairs just because he can! The one down side is that the new knee feels so good, the other knee becomes the "bad" knee!

Hope you find lots of relief and increased abilities from the knee upgrade!

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I am here today.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Hello everyone. I know my attendance here has been sporadic. When I last checked in, my daughter had gotten married in May, we went on vacation and I was trying to dig myself out of this hole I was in.

Let me first say that I love sparkpeople and everyone here. I want to be here, I want to continue my goals. I will never leave, at least not for long. This is still home for me and always will be.

I have had some serious issues that I have only told a few people about.

Me knee needs to be replaced. October 21 is the day. That has limited what I can do and I really want to be able to be more active so I am going to get it done.

I know being busy is no excuse. I have been busy my entire 4 years of being here but work has exploded. We have expanded our business into Solar and we are crazy busy but that is not why I haven't been here.

My heart is broken. I am devastated. I either eat or can't eat. I dont care about my physical self right now. Sorry. It's just honest. I have cried every day for 2 weeks and I am just trying to deal.

My daughter who married her lifelong boyfriend in May, has caused them to separate. It is her fault. He is devastated. He has lost his best friend, his home, and his wife. I just cannot wrap my head around it. He is not my son in law, he is my son. I just cant get a grip on it. I have dealt with her and made conditions on her living here, like counseling, getting healthy (alcohol etc).

I am sad. Sadder than I have been in a long time. I am dissapointed. I am mad.

It is just a hard time.

Dont give up. I will be back around more. I like it here. I need the support and the inspiration.
Sorry I havent been a very good friend to you all but I sure do think of you all very often...

I will be back. Soon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MUSICALLYMINDED 9/28/2014 12:44PM

    Sounds rough. emoticon

You're a SP lifer like me. We may falter but we persevere!

Hope things start to look up for you.

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COLUMBINE2 9/20/2014 11:48PM

    Jan, I'm very, very sorry about these really painful experiences and your health issues. You are one very strong, intelligent, wonderful woman and you'll get through this. I'm just sorry it's happened.

Imagine all your SP friends encircling you, arm in arm, encouraging you and caring about your well-being. Because we are, in fact, doing that. You just can't see us!

Hugs and true friendship,
Nancy

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MELLYBEANS0919 9/17/2014 12:58PM

    emoticon I am so very sorry to hear about your daughter & son-in-law. That must be devastating to all. I hope your knee replacement goes well, be kind to youreslf, you're going through so much. It is good to hear from you.

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HOLLYS_NEW_LIFE 9/16/2014 1:15PM

    Jan, I am so sorry to hear about your daughter and the family's situation. I can only imagine how hard things have been. I'm sure you've heard it before, but you can't take care of anyone else, if you're not taking care of yourself. I love you and I REALLY hope things get batter. We are all here for you, even though you may not be present. Don't worry about us, take care of YOU!

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REMEMBER2BME 9/16/2014 1:05PM

    First of all you are never to worry about us. What we want is for you to be happy and healthy. Know that we are here for you. This is not all about weight in my book, not at all.

I am glad that you have a plan regarding your knee. I am sure it won't be easy to say the least but you can take it one step at a time.

I am also VERY glad that you are letting yourself feel and that you have thought things through the best you can and have put conditions on your daughter staying with you. People sometimes make horrible mistakes and they then need to take responsibility for them.

We are here for you. You take care of you the best you can. HUGS!

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TREASURINGLIFE 9/16/2014 7:50AM

    ((((((HUGS)))))))

You and your family are in my prayers...

- Michelle

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AAAACK 9/16/2014 12:41AM

    You know...I was just saying how life makes us run through our full set of emotions pretty regularly. It's just that sometimes the intensity is seriously ratcheted up! I hope yours ratchets down soon, and in the meantime, you find some ways to feel good at least some of the time.

My heart is with you! You are such a wonderful cheerleader for the rest of us, maybe posting what's happening will allow us to do it for you for a change.

The thing about stuff is that it never lasts. I mean it may last in some ways, but it changes and morphs. May your stuff change and morph into something manageable very very soon. We're all with you!

emoticon emoticon

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KNEEMAKER 9/15/2014 11:34PM

  Marvelous Monday so keep on keeping on! emoticon

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shift of thinking...

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

So, last week, I was all rainbows and butterflies and happy, right? I was eating well, felt good, had a great weekend.

Got on the scale this am, looking for my 2 lb reward...NOPE! Gained a half a pound....I literally laughed out loud!

Which brings me to this.

I felt better last week.
I ate better last week.
I moved more last week.

Is any of that diminished because I didn't lose any weight according to the scale?
Heck no. It just means my focus needs to be on doing what I need to do to feel better.

That's it. Its not a number or a reward of a number. Its just every day, eating well, being good to my body, my spirit, my whole self. As I do that, that is my reward. The weight loss is a bonus.

I'm not gonna fall into that trap with the scale. I will weigh on Monday because that is my accountability but I will not allow that to control my efforts.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THREEE 7/5/2014 1:06AM

    THAT is so right...the scale is a TOOL, not the goal... emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CANNIE50 7/2/2014 12:27AM

    How are you, Jan? I am proud of you for overcoming the irrationality of the scale, and focusing on the fact that you actually felt better. I have had the same experience as you, and have also laughed (it may have been a laugh tinged with just a hint of bitterness). I have no wise words. I have been thinking of you and wondering how you are.

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BIGMAMAT 6/20/2014 1:15PM

    Go Mama, Go!!! emoticon emoticon

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DAISY443 6/18/2014 2:46PM

    Yay!!!!!! Perfect attitude!

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PJH2028 6/17/2014 9:42AM

    YES! THAN KYOU. EXACTLY entirely what i needed to read and hear and feel today… after posting my "update". Do it for ME. Live better. Live well. clove

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HOLLYS_NEW_LIFE 6/17/2014 8:26AM

    OMG, I did the EXACT same thing! Laughed my A$$ off when I saw a 3 pound gain. Yep, gained the same 3 I lost the week before, WTH?!? Whatever, I know I'm doing it right, and eventually, I will see it on the scale. You're doing great, just keep it going!

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NUMD97 6/17/2014 6:03AM

    Nicely done. THIS is what it is all about: Being the one in control, and not letting the scale dictate how we feel.

Thanks for posting!

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STEPH-KNEE 6/17/2014 2:28AM

    emoticon

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MELLYBEANS0919 6/17/2014 1:07AM

    Good for you! The number goes up and down for many reasons. Focus on how you feel.

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AAAACK 6/17/2014 12:45AM

    I love your attitude!

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JENNIERUN 6/17/2014 12:32AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
thank you for this post! I need to remember that when I saw my scale go up today!!
emoticon

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Victory over orange slices!

Saturday, June 14, 2014

Today my sister brought me over my favorite candy... Those sugary orange candies? I said thanks and put them in a baggy in my cupboard.

Then I cut up my watermelon and bagged that up along with some chicken to take to the races today. We will be gone all day so I wanted to be prepared and not eat crap at the racetrack.

I even had to go get ice and I got hubby some m and m's and I didn't eat any!!!

Yea, me!!!!!!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THREEE 7/5/2014 1:03AM

    absolutely, "yea you!!!" emoticon

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HOLLYS_NEW_LIFE 6/16/2014 9:47AM

    WOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!! That's a HUGE victory, way to go, I'm SOOOO proud of you!

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HGSGUY 6/15/2014 10:28AM

    You are in control! Empowering isn't it? Each time I maintain control over a negative force, I become stronger and find it easier to stay in control. Great job!!

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REMEMBER2BME 6/15/2014 6:23AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
Great job!

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CANNIE50 6/14/2014 6:49PM

    Yay you! You show that sugar who's boss! emoticon

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