MEDDYPEDDY   144,122
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Erasing games

Monday, October 13, 2014

Since summer I have played a game on my Ipad - "Pearlīs Peril" I did a lot in the beginning as I thought I would reach some sort of end, but after a month or so I understood that it is supposed to go on... for a very long time.

But I was stubborn and somehow determinated to finish it so I have been playing it very patiently, three times a day as the "energy" to play comes with timelimits.

And I found another couple of gameapps that I also found rather amusing and thought that they were innocent since I never started to spend any money on them (as they tempt you to do to be able to move faster forward)

Now it is time to realise that I am the same with "innocent" games that I am with cigarettes, whisky and food - I tend to obsess.

I started to think that I should erase them, but at the same time thought that it was better to play free games than to eat.

But now I will try to live with my empty soul for a while, with no distraction from food or games, teve is still "on" because I do have a daughter and even though we would probably have a lot of fun without teve, it is too big a step for now.

So all the games are erased from my I-pad and it will be interesting to see how I will manage.

I am on sick-leave with a severe cold - had gotten ready for work this morning when a sudden sneeze-and-snot-attack made me decide to stay at home. Reported two days of to work - and since then the sneeze and snot seems to have vanished. Weird. Normally I would really dwell in gameapps but they are gone...

In the absence of gameapps I will have to find something else to occupy my brain with...

I will not eat because the cold has paralysed my tastebuds, no use in dreaming about something yummy....

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHKIRK 10/13/2014 3:22PM

  Games can hook you before you know it !! My grandson LOVES them. He spent all the money he made for his birthday upgrading apps ! As long as the games do not stop you from doing your healthy things I think you will be alright. emoticon Keep taking care of yourself so the "Sneezies" will go away. emoticon Have a GREAT day !!

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AJDOVER1 10/13/2014 1:52PM

    I hope you feel better soon!

I've been taking a series of online classes. I hadn't thought of it in terms of an obsession, though.

I would never apply the phrase "empty soul" to you. You are full of life and existence.

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AKELAZ 10/13/2014 1:22PM

    Those games are a sort of curse it you let them be. You should be proud that you've seen the trap and done something about it. I see how much they pre-occupy my grandchildren and suck them into another (false) world and wish my son and wife would limit the time they allow them to spend there. There are so many other real things to do - and I've always admired the way you try out new interests and the DIY that you do - never mind how much time you devote to your job, to doggy and to your daughter. Sure you'll find something new and better to do with your time - as someone said here downloading interesting books would be good perhaps. Once you recover from your cold you may feel better about things. I do hope so - will be thinking of you.

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GRAYLADY13 10/13/2014 12:19PM

    Addiction sucks us in doesn't. Being with my emotions is where I am currently finding my eating has been limitless. My diabetes blood sugar is screaming at me too. Sending you a sweet hang in there hug.

Get well and treat yourself to lots of loving care. I like to give myself a manicure, at home mind no need to spend money. I massage my hands and pamper with polish sometimes too.

Rearranging my closet is also something I like to do. Try on clothes that may fit now. Organize outfits. Look at making new combos out of what I have. Sometimes tradeing clothes with a friend too is fun. I also like to clean out and give away clothes I won't wear again.

Just some spend no money suggestions. I hope you feel better soon.

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JOYINKY 10/13/2014 11:19AM

    I've just never enjoyed the computer games and I'm glad as I spend too much time on here already! I see you as many things; but never and empty soul! You have so much going on in your life, writing to do, projects to tackle, etc. But, sometimes I feel that slump with the change of seasons; throws me off balance for a bit. Enjoy your downtime and relax or do something else fun. Hugs.

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2014TODAY 10/13/2014 9:36AM

    Oh! I hope you will use your brain to write blogs!

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INGMARIE 10/13/2014 8:33AM

    Enjoy the free time, I am also playing games, so now I have taken up Spanish and have less time for games.
Have a great week. emoticon

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LOPEYP 10/13/2014 7:22AM

    I have one game that I keep playing on my phone. i realize that i waste a lot of time doing it.
Perhaps you can download a book from the library to enjoy in your spare time.

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OPHELIE 10/13/2014 6:45AM

    Good for you! I seem to be doing the same "obsessive" game playing for a while, then I quit, but somehow find my way back...

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Gaining

Sunday, October 12, 2014

... I think I set a new record for gaining weight - four kilos in a week!

Although I try not to despair over it, the explanation is that I had the last medicin on monday and it took until friday until I got to the pharamcy and fetched another ration of my oedema pills. I could feel the fluid assembling in my legs during the week and although the pills has started to work I can still feel my legs as a little swollen - I will see what the scale says next saturday, I did well with food so it should have been either a little loss or no change at all.

I have an irritating cold lurking - my eardrums moves when I try to breathe through my nose or swallow- these lurkings usually lasts for a month or two but I still prefer them to having a big cold for three or four days. Which - byt the way - I have not had for ages, I think it is all the ginger, turmeric and rosehip I add to my food....

I was rather content with my sixth stand-upp rookie performance - until thursday when the anxiety for upcoming event started (will be next wednesday) ALl the downgrading thoughts started "who do I think I am" "I am just ridiculous and not funny at all" - and then I came home and found a letter adressed to "crazy-funny... me" It was a pair of knickers... explanation is that I buy my (very expensive) knickers from a shop in that village where the stand-up club is and this underwear shop is rather famous all over the country and the owner was in the audience and I said " hey, Ylva, please laug because I have your knickers on...." and she sent me this pair as a thanks for the PR - which she surely would not have done if she had thought I was really bad... so my courage rose again and I am trying to keep the anxiety in a reasonable level.

It is raining really hard - I had planned to go cycling with doggy this morning and it is maybe fortunate that I did not because this heavy rain would have struck us a long way from home...

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LJCANNON 10/13/2014 12:41AM

    emoticon So happy hear the Edema Meds are Working!! I am sure that the scale will be headed the Right Direction next week!!
emoticon So glad that you missed the Rain Storm!! DH and I walked to the Store this evening as usual and we had been Home exactly Three Minutes when it started Raining like crazy, LOL!!

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CATHEMARIE 10/12/2014 7:23PM

    emoticon emoticon

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AJDOVER1 10/12/2014 5:08PM

    The number on the scale is not always a reflection of how well you've done with food -- that's not exactly what a scale is measuring.

How fun that your comedy was acknowledged with knickers! emoticon

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JOYINKY 10/12/2014 10:35AM

    The fact that you've had 6 successful performances and keep going back says a LOT! You must be funny! I've heard famous performers of stand up declare they still have the jitters before going on. You will know, in time, if it's something you want to continue to do.
That said, the weigh gain probably is the edema and it seems to me it must be dangerous for you to skip the medicine for days at a time. Something worth more careful planning in the future. Hope you are back in balance soon. Also hope your cold does not linger long. Be well. emoticon

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INGMARIE 10/12/2014 10:24AM

    See, you are funny, no matter what you think
The knickers Lady liked it LOL Awesome. emoticon

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Voice care

Tuesday, October 07, 2014

I went to a workshop for singers yesterday. I was relctant because it is hard to drive back to town once I have gotten home in the evening, but as I had signed up for it and as I did think that they would not have too many participators I pulled myself together, got up from the sofa and went.

And I am glad, it was really interesting. It was held in english as the leader was a rock singer from Ireland. It was interesting that she had moved from Ireland to London to attend London Music college and then lived in Wales for a while setting up her own company an making money by singing in pubs, at weddings, funerals and in bands occasionally. And then a swedish woman had seen some stuff from her online and phoned and asked if she would be interested in being the lead singer in a swedish rock band "Thundermother" So - now she had moved to Stockholm and was starting to learn swedish but had to wait for the immigrant permit (because then lessons are free)...

I found that my english is really good and I thank Spark for it - writing and reading here has really expanded my vocabulary and as for pronunciation we have all these english/amercian teveseries all the time - I am afraid my accent is no doubt more american than english.

Anyway, it was really interesting - the other attendants were mostly rocksingers in bands - and of course a lot younger than me - but the workshop was about voice care and vocie developement and I really learned a lot. I have planned to sing a little more on stage than I do now, the long perspective plan is to create some sort of show combining stand-up, accordian and singing - but the voice I have today will probably manage that - but as I have occasionally had problems with my voice during all those years of lecturing (and this singer told me that speaking is many times harder on the voice than singing) I am happy to have learned some techniqes for developing and broaden my vice.

Great evening - and I do love the irish accent!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GRAYLADY13 10/9/2014 9:49PM

    Fantastic! You are so groovy. Hugs for going. Sprinkles of fairy dust for being you *"*"*"*"*"*"*" emoticon

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AJDOVER1 10/7/2014 10:50PM

    good for you. Thanks for sharing your evening with us.

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JOYINKY 10/7/2014 9:00AM

    Glad you got up and out! That's the hardest part for me in the evening; but whatever the attraction I'm always glad when I do. Glad it was a good session. I think we take our voices too much for granted; they do need care. I find mine changing since I am not using it as much; I don't like the change. Need to work on that. Enjoy your week!


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LOPEYP 10/7/2014 8:26AM

    Sounds like an interesting session.

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INGMARIE 10/7/2014 8:08AM

   


Comment edited on: 10/7/2014 8:08:36 AM

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INGMARIE 10/7/2014 8:01AM

    emoticon That sounded like a fun evening.


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Stand-up comedy

Thursday, October 02, 2014

Yesterday I did my fifth stand-up-comedy performance - and my first in a "real" club, which means that it was organised with a headliner, a runner-upp and two rookies. I was one of the rookies and as usual almost unconcious with nerves and "why-am-I-doing-this"-anxiety.

It was 70 km from home, the friend that I am trying to do this together with was to late in signing up and did not get to be a rookie this time.

The anxiety before was as bad as always - I have told myself that I will try this ten times and after that evaluate if I want to continue. It is really painful to be that nervous - but progress is arriving because finally at stage yesterday I had some fun and felt as if I could manage... so it is really just aquestion of hanging in there

And I am really happy that this guy arranges these nights because it is very hard for a stand-up rookie to get places to practice. He will do it more times this autumn and I have already signed up. I am not sure that I really want to do it "for real" it is not something that I like to listen to myself and I canīt see the use for it... but for myself I think it is really good practice to be better on stage, work with connecting to an audience and to get better in presence... and the great feeling afterwards is to die for!

It is also deadline week and as I managed (almost) to really keep up with my writing I am not behind and have no bad conscience for posponing things and it is all very calm... strange!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GRAYLADY13 10/9/2014 12:20PM

    Awe you are wonderful! Wish I could be in audience! Three minutes of applause from me, standing! emoticon

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AJDOVER1 10/3/2014 3:29PM

    You're an inspiration. I admire you for committing to doing it 10 times!

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LIVE_AMAZINGLY 10/2/2014 4:00PM

    Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but I think getting up on stage like you do would just kill me, as I would die of fright!

emoticon
For being SO brave!

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JOYINKY 10/2/2014 9:53AM

    emoticon YOU, that is!! You continue to amaze me as you challenge yourself and continue to grow. If you can do stand up, you can do anything! emoticon

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INGMARIE 10/2/2014 7:55AM

    emoticon quite Awesome I'd say emoticon

I think you should hang in there, you seem to enjoy this sort of stuff, acting, standup, music ,Is there anything you can not do?
Love it keep it up. emoticon

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RASPBERRY56 10/2/2014 5:23AM

    emoticon

I've just started to "get into" stand-up comedy as a major entertainment source (thanks to the inclusion of satellite radio in my new ride)..........those folks who do so are awesome and have my admiration and respect - not everyone can do that kind of a thing for a living!

By all means - continue to hang in there!

emoticon

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WEARINGTHIN 10/2/2014 3:22AM

    I've listened to people who do stand up, and it seems that there is always that element of stage fright before a performance, even as a veteran. I was waiter in a restaurant outside of Detroit. Louis Nye, a comedian form mid 20th century who did quite a bit of network TV came in before his show down the street. He was very nervous and wanted some apricot nectar, which I didn't have . I offered him pineapple juice or Seven up. Finally, our manager had been eavesdropping and had someone run out and buy the nectar. I felt for Louis all alone and scared in a big town. Glenn

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2014TODAY 10/2/2014 3:06AM

    I took two workshops in 'Speaking Circles'. They're organized in Europe maybe in Sweden too. It's about connecting with the audience in a way that the public feels seen.
http://www.speakingcircles
international.com
It is to help improve one's public speaking, but I also found it a lot of fun and VERY inspiring.

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YMWONG22 10/2/2014 1:33AM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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NASFKAB 10/2/2014 1:06AM

  great ob inspiring thanks for sharing

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AKELAZ 10/2/2014 12:41AM

    You never cease to amaze me. You try so many different things with a great deal of courage and considerable success and you find ways to enjoy all of them. Truly I think you are an admirable example to many in how to live a varied and interesting life. Quite inspirational in fact. emoticon

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The potato crisp miracle

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

So I went to the store for vegetables and passed the aisle with potatocrisps. A bag caught my eye "new flavour - chanterelles and sour cream". I could not resist, put it in my basket and added all the healthy vegetables...

Normally that is where the choice is made. It was long ago I tried to fool myself by saying "I will buy it and only have a handful a day"... I know that if it goes home with me it goes in my stomach rather quick.

And as a true addict I opened the bag in the car and took some. They were nice. Already feeling the depression over "again..." I studied the nutrition information - 530 cal/100 g, The bag was 275 g - so around 1500 cal in one snack.

And then the miracle happened - I did not want anymore. Thought that I needed to get rid of that bag because I did not know how long that blessing of not wanting it would last. Considered giving it to my dog sitter but she had gastric bypass and gained a ,ot of weight during her stay in the psych ward recently, it would not be a nice gesture to give her those crisps.

Took the risk of bringing them home because I wanted to weigh them and see how much I had eatened. Ten grams! That was about 50 calories - how nice!

So the bag is in the bin - thai sauces pured over it just for safety and I am very grateful for this miracle. I will not fool myself that this means I now can handle that stuff in my home, just be grateful that the miracle happened and then keep on taking the precautions I need not to find myself alone with those bad foods...

Had some nice soup with eggplant mushrooms (real ones not just a flavour :-)) and canelloni beans.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CATHEMARIE 10/5/2014 3:54PM

    That is a success!! Congratulations on this victory!

emoticon emoticon

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AJDOVER1 9/26/2014 7:34PM

    This is great to read! I've been focusing on "what do I do after I've done the wrong thing." I love your miracle. I can make miracles in my own life as well.

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ADAGIO_CON_BRIO 9/26/2014 11:54AM

    Wonderful! You can be very proud of yourself for deflecting the emergency. I wish I had the stamina to toss items purchased by the infallibly wrong impulses I have... emoticon

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FIT4MEIN2013 9/25/2014 10:22PM

    Great job!! emoticon

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LJCANNON 9/25/2014 8:32PM

    emoticon Precious Moment, indeed!! Congratulations on your Victory over those Crisps.

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INGMARIE 9/25/2014 7:37AM

    emoticon way to go. emoticon

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JOYINKY 9/25/2014 7:05AM

    Congratulations! A familiar story to me. I know giving myself that "I can have just one" is "stinkin' thinkin'"; at least for me. I have caved over and over when setting myself up for that temptation. You did well and I agree; reading those labels, seeing how small those "servings" are and what the cost is in calories all help and the victory is sweet. Many foods are just not worth the price; in time, that sinks in. Proud of you!!

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2014TODAY 9/25/2014 3:50AM

    I never know what to do with the leftovers of products that I got because I wanted to have 'just a little of them'.
I wrote more but I'll put it in my own blog, don't want to write an essay on yours!


Comment edited on: 9/25/2014 3:52:15 AM

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AKELAZ 9/25/2014 1:12AM

    I remember blogging about a similar situation of my own - a long time ago - and your response was 'Ah - precious moments' which absolutely hit the nail on the head for me. I am often reminded of it when I think I can't resist something but know that if I do that moment will be 'precious' so I throw it away or make a better choice. Thus I return your comment - a 'precious moment' - because, with some thought, we make our own good moments and these moments tell us that in the long run we CAN find a better way through our bad habits.
So well done you - and thank you for reminding me.

PS - your soup looks delicious. I have tried your soup habit with some success, before and rather think it is time for me to do it again. Another 'thank you'.

Comment edited on: 9/25/2014 1:14:04 AM

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MOONGLOWSNANA 9/24/2014 11:05PM

  Good thinking and reading labels! Trigger foods can pull you in and take over if you let them. Nice gesture with the hot sauce and success! Baby steps will get you where you want to go! emoticon

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