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Be Kind Rewind....

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

....A message that use to be on VHS tapes when you rented them at the store.. and that is what I am doing this
Week, I am being kind to myself, I have decided to “lay off” and give myself a break… a break from self destruction
and negative thoughts and actions.. no stepping on the scale, no beating myself up this week.

So I am rewinding to the beginning when I started my journey and It was simple and easy to follow and I did not make it complicated
Which it is not I who gets in my own way can make it that way.. things where broke and I fixed it and it worked so I need to rewind the tape
And follow the instructions and journey that I was taking back in 2010 when I started this..

I also realized that starting over is not a bad thing, look at Spring,.. it happens every year at this time, it is a new chance to start over fresh
new beginning all fresh and reborn. I use to hate starting diets over and over and over, and that is why they never worked and too I know this is not a
diet it is a way of life.. and well I am living it.. ok fine I hit a pot hole but I did not fall so deep that I could not crawl out. In the past I would gain all my weight back
and then be even more in despair and self destruction, I am proud of my accomplishments, through out this journey, the fact that I have lost 100 lbs and the fact
that I can walk, and ride a bike, get in and out of a car, bend down tie my shoe fit in a chair, get in and out of my car, go up and down stairs.. and the list goes on..
besides the fact that I tore my knee this December, I am unable to do a heavy bootcamp type of work outs any more but how cool can I say I injured my self doing something
of physical sport activity and it was not weight related issue.. LOL …. Use to be in the past I would say my knees hurt, my hip hurts my back hurts.. and it was all because of my
weight and not that fact that I did something to being active.. .. I love being active and active is the way I am going to stay hurt knee or not it is getting better

So I am rewinding and being kind..

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SNOWYOGA 4/15/2014 6:35PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HILLSLUG98239 4/15/2014 5:48PM

    You deserve kindness - especially from yourself!

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JANETRIS 4/15/2014 5:37PM

    emoticon We should all take your advice Anita! Thanks for sharing! emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 4/15/2014 3:39PM

  That's exactly right . . . get back to the basics! Good job, great attitude. Good luck! Don't give up!



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MISSG180 4/15/2014 12:23PM

    I think this is a terrific attitude, and I think I will join you. Right now I'm having to be extra-kind to myself, but "kindness" doesn't have to mean "eating all the jelly donuts ever." Kindness can be gentle movement and good nutrition--real kindness. Thank you for the inspiration!

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LISASGONNADOIT 4/15/2014 11:50AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MOTTAMAMALOU 4/15/2014 11:12AM

    Good for you. You know what you want and what you have to do to get there.


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LOVELESMILLS 4/15/2014 11:07AM

  emoticon

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DOODLES1013 4/15/2014 11:07AM

  emoticon Love your attitude. Keep up the good work. (love your trees! Are they crab apple?)

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BRAINBENTT 4/15/2014 11:06AM

  emoticon emoticon

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What A Diffrence ...

Saturday, April 05, 2014

.... People can make on your mood, I have to say thank you to everyone who lifted me up and made me feel like I can do this, I was down but I was not out.. and now I am back up.. I know that I have come a long way and I got a long way to go.. but where am I going? I mean I plan on living each day as well as I can and I should not be in a hurry to get where I think I demand to be I mean yea I have goals and I will meet those goals all I need to do is work toward those goals and I will get there the rest this weight will come off. but if it did not then I need to except that.. I need to except where my body is right now and lets face it ..it is not where it use to be 330 lbs out of shape, unable to climb stairs with out huffing and puffing I can ride my bike, walk 5 miles, be active and on the run, I can walk around the whole store with out pain in my hips and make excuse why I need to sit or leave that instant ..yes things have changed for me and I want to keep doing them and keep challenging my self.. seeing I should not run do to my knee but I can still walk so I am going to challenge my walking pace.. this Summer, also I have a challenge for my self to finish a 30 mile bike race in less then 2 hours.. I am going to do it this Summer.. I want to finish it in
an hour and 45 minutes.. and I think I can do it.. my road blocks are hills, so this Spring.. I will be challenging hills..

So Thank you again.. to everyone.. the scale has moved a tiny bit and it is in the right direction and for me the scale has to be only once a week thing.. which I am going to do going forward..

Have a great weekend all

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SNOWYOGA 4/9/2014 2:58PM

    Thanks for your blog

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NANHBH 4/7/2014 1:30PM

    That's the positive Anita that I know and love!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MNCYCLIST 4/6/2014 2:57PM

    emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 4/5/2014 6:26PM

  Glad you're feeling more positive.

HUGS

`*•.¸ ♥ ¸.•*´¨☆¨`*•.¸ ♥ ¸.•*´¨♥¸.•*´¨☆(¸.•´¨`¸•
*¨♥ *`*•.¸☆´¨`*“
“If the shoe doesn’t fit, kick it off and put on another shoe. Don’t be afraid of change because change is good – it opens up worlds of possibilities.” Myra Hunn
¨`*•.¸ ♥ ¸.•*´¨☆¨`*•.¸ ♥ ¸.•*´¨♥¸.•*´¨☆(¸.•´¨`¸•
*¨♥ *`*•.¸☆´¨`*“



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JANETRIS 4/5/2014 2:18PM

    Hey Anita....I read your other blog too...gee we've all been there before. Sometimes we are just tired of it all. Take a mental break and make a list of all the positive things you have done for yourself. I bet the list is very long! You have what it takes and you can do this!...You are a great Spark friend too! emoticon emoticon

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LISASGONNADOIT 4/5/2014 11:04AM

    Excellent! You have accomplished sooooo much! Be proud! I know I am proud of you! Awesome goals and plans. You CAN do it!! emoticon

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ELRIDDICK 4/5/2014 9:36AM

  Thanks for sharing

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Defeated

Thursday, April 03, 2014

I am not sure how I can go from two days ago feeling empowered and ready to fight and work hard to feeling so defeated.. and so betrayed... I feel my body or something with in my body is betraying me.. why I keep practicing healthy living by eating right, working out I don't smoke, I drink the once and awhile glass of wine. .. and yet my body is not losing the extra pounds that are on my body.. I just this is what baffles me and makes me so frustrated.. that when I can see results in my arms and shoulders and my back when I do weight lifting and push ups.. I see my arms getting more defined and toned. and that is the results of my strength working out..
but why is it a week or two of eating right no junk no high carbs and even protein meal replacement drinks a couple times.. that the scale is not going down..
and I know don't focus on the number and the scale does not define me. but it is a measure of health and for some reason it is not measuring my health I mean yea it is saying my healthy is not good.

I know that I let loose at the holiday time and with all the extra rich foods and such I put 10 on I knew I could get it off I made a goal on Jan 1 that I would lose the 10 plus an extra 30 that was 40lbs in 4 months which and I was doing it because we are going to a concert in a couple of weeks and I wanted to look great I was so excited and so determined. Not only have I not lost that 10 or 30 but gained 5..and like I said these past two weeks the scale has not moved at all.. not one pound I mean maybe down 1 up 2 down 3 up 1.. that is what it has been doing.. I just do not know any more and I know it is what you put in your mouth and what you put out (meaning working out ) that counts..

I am not on any medications. my thyroid is fine it was tested last Sep.. I am not sure what the story is.. really...How do my clothes feel the same.. well my 18s are a big snug but tops are fine.. they fit good..

I know I am ranting I need to let it out.. because if I don't I eat.. I truly believe emotions hold weight on so if I get it out and vent (bear with me) maybe it will come off..

I know I am not the only one who is going through this.. I refuse to give up.. I refuse to let it win but .. sometimes its like expecting it to snow in Vegas.. I mean it could but chances are not..

Thanks for letting me vent.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LUCKYDOGFARM 4/4/2014 1:25PM

    Throw your scale away MsAnita! Obviously it doesn't work. You look great. You feel great. I'm gonna put up a no scale weigh In Challenge. Join with me and let's defeat this scale obsession!

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HILLSLUG98239 4/3/2014 5:17PM

    Ugh. I know your patience and dedication will be rewarded. But I don't know when.

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PAQTEQ 4/3/2014 12:00PM

    I had one of these blogs recently, so I will tell you what (suggestion by another Sparker) has been working like a charm for me.

GO SALTFREE.

I hope it works for you. As soon as I cut the salt out of my diet, I have consistently seen weight loss on a DAILY basis. Anywhere from 0.2 to 0.8 PER DAY.

Hit me up and let me know how it goes.

Don't let this beat you. Keep doing what you are doing until this phase passes.

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1CRAZYDOG 4/3/2014 10:13AM

  I feel your frustration leaping from the pages! Just one question -- I know you said you're going thru the "Big M" and that really causes havoc with are hormones, which are intimately attached to our metabolism function. My question, have you had your blood sugar tested? IF pre-diabetes is lurking, that can be a cause, too, because the circulating blood sugar, if it's elevated, causes the insulin to continue to be pumped out by the pancreas, but it is not able to get into the cells. Just a thought if you haven't already had it tested.

Otherwise, look @ what you've accomplished so far! THAT'S something positive to think about. It does take the body time to "get used to" our new weight @ each stage in our weight loss. It'll happen again! In the meantime, do look at those non-scale victories. Those are majorly important.

And so glad you chose to write this blog vs. self-medicating with food! That's a victory too!

HUGS

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NANHBH 4/3/2014 9:32AM

    Anita,

I feel your pain and can hear your frustration. You say that you want to look great when you go to that concert. Well I just want to say that you look great already! Do you see how far you have come? Hang in there. When your body is ready to release more weight, it will. Keep doing all the right things.
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CAPECODLIGHT 4/3/2014 8:39AM

    Please see my comments that I just posted this AM on your last blog. Also, you may be at a set point for you. My doc is a strong believer in these - that each individual's body has different weights at which it feels comfortable. It resists gaining weight and losing weight when you are at that particular weight. One of my set points is the 230's. I can hang around in that zone regardless of what I eat or don't eat for weeks. Once I break away from it, I find weight loss goes really smoothly until I hit my next one in then 190's. I have yet to get out of those! Don't despair. It will happen. We just don't get to call the shots as much. Just keep being good to your body, and it will be good to you.

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SCARLETTHEATHER 4/3/2014 8:33AM

    Sorry you're feeling frustrated. Are you tracking your food, making sure you're staying within your calorie range? For that matter, have you updated your nutrition tracker lately? I know that when I had hit a plateau, and was trying to figure out why, it turned out that I needed to update my nutrition tracker. I was consuming too many calories!

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ZUMBAOBSESSED 4/3/2014 8:26AM

    do you think we can blame it on the weather?? Because I can't understand why I've seen no progress since Jan. either. Part of it for me is that I am not going to my zumba classes anymore. So my cardio minutes have dropped dramatically. You mentioned weight training. But do you do any cardio? I have been eating 1,500 calories everyday since Jan. and the pounds are not coming off. When I was attending zumba 4 days a week, I was probably burning 2,000 calories and I was losing about 1 lb. a week. So, for me, moderate exercise and consuming 1,500 calories is not enough for me to lose weight. I guess I need to increase my cardio. There you go, I just vented too. Maybe we need to participate in some challenges or something.

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LISASGONNADOIT 4/3/2014 8:06AM

    I can totally relate to your frustration! You just wrote how I feel too and what is happening to me. Menopause, I believe, has a lot to do with it and stress. I am afraid to get on the scale because it never goes down. What keeps me sane is not getting on the scale and trying to live a healthy lifestyle day in and day out. I feel so much better overall. Never give up because even if the scale isn't moving, you are living a healthy lifestyle and that in itself is soooo beneficial and important. It is awesome you vented!!!! Keep on with healthy living! You are worth it!! emoticon emoticon

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The gloves are off..

Tuesday, April 01, 2014

Besides it being Spring and I have taken off my winter gloves, but I am putting on my fighting gloves now..no more fooling around April first may be a fools day but I am not going to let it be the whole month.. I have new refined determination .. almost like it was 4 years ago when I joined spark for the first time. which was 4 years ago this month.... so let me bring you back to 2010.. when I was 330 lbs and depressed and was at my wits end.. I was just told I could not have the bi pass surgery due to my hernia, I had just lost 20 lbs and was told I need to do this if I did not want to die, I was pretty lucky that I did not have all the diseases that went with obesity such as diabetes and sleep apnea I walked out of the Doctors office very determined and I told my self that I was going to fight and do what ever it took.. and well it took a lot of sweat, tears and fighting to lose 100lbs which I say I could not of done it with out the help of this site and spark friends and family.. ....

Now fast forward to present time.... we all know that the road that we travel on this journey is not smooth sailing there are bumps, potholes, and detours, but we get through them sometimes it takes longer other times not.. I made a wrong turn around the Holidays and well some weight has come on.. 10 to be exact.. and I just cannot get it off.. I thought it had to do with the fact that I can not work out like I use to be able to because of my knee and too I stopped going to the gym due to my knee, so the only think I can do is ride my spinning bike which I have one at home so I ride that and do free weights and such.. ...
But today I found out there is much more reason of why the weight is not coming off as fast as it use too. I am officially entered menopause.. My GYN confirmed it today and she told me it is going to be a long haul from here on in.. and harder and harder... but.. the good news is that all what I am doing the good eating and the working out and healthy lifestyle living that I am doing is working for me because I would only be where I was 4 years ago and more some..

So, seeing how I like to fight and defy the odds. I walked out of my doctors office and said menopause you are going down with a fight.. that is for sure.. I am going to go back to what I did 4 years ago of hard core tracking, portion control, low fat, low carb and really watching what I eat..limit my cheat days. yes I believe in them but they are going to be far and few till the 10lbs that I gained and the rest of my weight are gone.. The gloves are on and I am ready to fight.. because I am not going to let this menopause change who I am ...

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NANHBH 4/3/2014 9:43AM

    Anita,

I'm reading your blogs backward. Welcome to the ranks of menopause! Yeah, it does get tougher to shed those pounds, but don't let that scare you. Together we can do what we cannot do alone!
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CAPECODLIGHT 4/3/2014 7:47AM

    emoticon You can do this because past success is the best prediction of future success. You know how this all works, even if you have the new twist of menopause to contend with.
I am post menopausal and the biggest difference I see is that I seem to linger longer at plateaus; so weight loss, when I gain a bit, is a more sporadic event rather than predictable. So, my only recommendation is give yourself a longer window of time to see results. In the meantime, you'll feel great with the better diet and exercise.

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MNCYCLIST 4/2/2014 7:07AM

    Nothing can stop the one who is determined! Face forward, you can do this! You WILL succeed!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 4/1/2014 11:55PM

    No more of that girl stuff! Now you get to fight like a WOMAN! SuperWoman that is!

GoGetEm MsAnita! emoticon

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SNOWYOGA 4/1/2014 10:31PM

    Great blog emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LISASGONNADOIT 4/1/2014 10:19PM

    What a great blog! You sound like you ARE ready for a fight and I know you are going to do it. Look at what you have done so far! Wow, totally amazing! You inspire me big time. You have lost a ton of weight! You have proven to yourself it can be done. My reality is much the same, menopause since I was 33 (21 years ago) and knee issues. The bike is my go to too! You give me hope!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 4/1/2014 9:52PM

  Honey, I'm 60 and went thru the big "M" awhile ago. BUT you CAN still do it. Definitely. The hormones, well those dang little pests make it maybe more difficult, but believe me, not impossible. Good luck to you. Keep that fighting spirit! That's what's needed.

Good luck.

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SMILESHINE81 4/1/2014 9:30PM

    You did it once, you can do it again! Don't ever give up!

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HOTPINKCAMARO49 4/1/2014 9:25PM

  emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Marching in like a lion

Saturday, March 01, 2014

February ended really fast.. and to be honest I am glad it did.. it was a good month I spent it getting back on track and really trying to work my program and for once I am not going to get down on my self and say I could of done better, I mean sure I could of we all could of.. but I am happy with what I did or tried to do and the effort I put in..

Soooo now it is time to March.. and that is what I intend to do .. March right in and step it up.. weight did not come off of me that I had gained at the holiday time.. I have to get 10 lbs off and then I will be back to where I was before the Holidays. I so wanted 40 by April 9 for when we go to the Cher concert in Boston but ya know it is what it is..

I have 2 to 3 major rides coming up and those I need to really train for.. so I am stepping up my training and I cannot have food or me being off track with my food a problem so its simple all I need to do is eat clean.. follow what I did when I first started my journey, 3 meals 2 snacks no JUNK..no pizza no wings, yes I need to be more harder on my self I mean not to a point where I have no room to breath but I feel if I cut that out.. which was only once a week or so then I will be ahead no more picking or saying oh give me just one when I see my Hubby and Daughter eating something.. I swear those two are a bad influence LOL

So I got a plan of how this 10 will come off and to get ready for rides..

My Marching orders for March (goal)

Ride Spinning bike 15 mins AM before work 20 or more after work

strength training 3x weekly along with speed bag work 2x weekly

water, 110 oz a day

Walking the dog.. when temps are above 39.. or more walk dog..

Support .. Support Support what would happen to roof if it was not supported? it would fall so if I don't want this plan to fall I am seeking my support an Spark supports me you all support me.. and I will be reaching out more when I truly feel when you give support that only strengths your support..
So I am a Marching and ready to come into March like a lion..

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SNOWYOGA 3/16/2014 2:40PM

    I'm really sorry I haven't been around a lot, but I have been having knee trouble, just be careful emoticon Thanks for your post

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LUCKYDOGFARM 3/7/2014 7:29PM

    Great plan MsAnita! GoGetEmGirl!

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JANETRIS 3/3/2014 5:13PM

    Way to work up a great plan Anita....you can do this! emoticon

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ZIGGY122 3/3/2014 12:09PM

    emoticon Great plan I am sure you'll hit your goals for March

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GOCALGAL 3/3/2014 9:33AM

    Wow! I took a look at your profile and you (even with the holiday weight gain...aargh for most of us) have lost and kept off an Amazing amount and should be SO proud of yourself!! Great plan! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon ~Maria

Comment edited on: 3/3/2014 9:39:55 AM

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CAPECODLIGHT 3/2/2014 5:34PM

    You sound like you have things well in hand - a plan with a purpose and a way to achieve it. March on!

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MISSG180 3/2/2014 1:21PM

    Just be careful on that knee!

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1CRAZYDOG 3/1/2014 5:54PM

  Definitely lion-like here too! Love your Marching orders. Great plan!

HUGS One- day-at-a-time.

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