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Reality..

Friday, November 21, 2014

well it was time to face the music, that is for sure I have not stepped on the scale the whole month of November.. I knew that is would put me in a tail spin..... I was or has been or am still struggling.. not with food so much but with everything.. the stress has gotten to me and the stress is mostly from my chasing and chasing and trying to hold on to what little I have of motivation and willingness to lose weight and I just feel like my some line backer is bushing me.. there is a defense line that I cannot break through.. its line I am running down the field running as fast as I can and there is this wall that is hold out arms pushing me saying no no you can't cant come close.. get back..

I try every day to work my program as I say.. I know I was making some choices that where not good for me.. and to be honest it was not out and out binges. but it was pizza there pasta there. chips here cake there.. ok..yea but there was that wall saying hahahah you cheated you cannot get past go back.. and back I went..

So this past two weeks I had a huge plan.. the play book was written.. I knew what I needed to do and I was off running again. feeling good. feeling empowered feeling like Ok I am doing good ... then bam.. I had to step on that scale this morning just a quick side line curiosity got to me.. and reality stood up and slapped me back..
up 10lbs.. 10.. from the Summer 10 from all the stepping on the scales and seeing I was up 10 from the previous Fall..

So not only did I go all Summer long with out losing the 10 I gained from last Holiday.. I put on 10 more..

I have no words.. I don't know what to say or what to do for that fact.. I am not going to say how can this be? I know what happen but I just cannot believe that working my tail off for 11 months makes me gain in stead of lose.. I did not lose one pound this summer I was playing with the same up and down 3lbs and then finally it was all gain gain gain..

I sit here and cannot believe that I made said to my self last year this time that I was going to be at my goal weight.. ha..ha ha ha.. not only no there but so much further away..

Can someone help me??? can someone tell me what am I doing wrong..? I track my food all the time.. I am at 1300 calories all the time I know there where events of eating more or something that I should not of.. but it was not like a daily thing..
I eat clean breakfast lunch and dinner. no fast food no processed but yes I have had pizza pasta, chips and crackers but not in a binging way.. it would like if they where out because someone was munching on them I would dip in.. I don't know..but
I am at a lost again..

sorry this was so long and drawn out.. Have a good day!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SNOWYOGA 12/7/2014 8:48PM

    Thank you for sharing your post!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 11/23/2014 4:26PM

    MsAnita, as usual, I'm in the same boat with you. I'm up 15 pounds!! Not a happy camper here' but what are we going to do about it? I know for me, I have NOT been as comitted to my health as I need to be.
We need to be kicking each other's butts, that's what!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 11/23/2014 4:25PM

    MsAnita, as usual, I'm in the same boat with you. I'm up 15 pounds!! Not a happy camper here' but what are we going to do about it? I know for me, I have NOT been as comitted to my health as I need to be.
We need to be kicking each other's butts, that's what!

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MAMABEAR372 11/21/2014 8:28PM

    Learning to forgive yourself is a big thing that is hard to learn. Figuring out if calories burned is around calories taken in? Learning to calm yourself with deep breathing? Drinking half your weight in ounces a day.. which I think you do. Believe in yourself. It takes time. Unfortunately it goes on faster than it comes off. Biggest thing...don't give up. I believe in you and you can get there! emoticon

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KALANTHA 11/21/2014 8:24PM

    I'm sorry you're having a tough time. I know how easy it is to slip back into old patterns with things like pizza, pasta, cake, etc. and, BAM, the next thing you know, you've got a gain. Not fun, but definitely reversible.

My suggestion would be to go back to basics, as has been suggested here before. Back to measuring, counting, drinking water, and move, move, moving. And do it now before you have even more to undo. I speak as someone who's regained a tremendous amount of weight and is now paying the price for it.

Don't give up. You CAN do this.

emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 11/21/2014 12:50PM

    All I can say is what's been suggested already . . . weigh/measure and track your food. Pasta here and pizza there is NOT going to cause a 10 lb. weight gain. UNLESS it's in larger than healthy portions.

It takes a tremendous amt. of courage to admit you're not where you want to be. But it takes even MORE courage to make a plan, evaluate it, change up what may need changing, and move on.

That's what it takes!

HUGS

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NHES220 11/21/2014 10:38AM

    I think you need to get back to measuring and tracking. You may think you are staying in your range, but you may not be. Also, I know that I need to stay low carb. Even if I stay within my range, but I'm having chips and pasta, my weight will creep up. Also, are you exercising? Good luck!

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DTHOR6 11/21/2014 10:32AM

    One thing I have learned is that sometimes you need the pizza, pasta ect. You can't tell yourself that you can't have it or you will just binge the next time you see it if you know what I am trying to say. Shake things up a bit eat low on your goal a couple days then high. This is what I am learning to do and it seems to be working. I hit a plateau and that is what finally helped.

I have taken NOTHING out of my diet. I eat pizza a couple times a month. I however do not eat nearly what I use to. All things in moderation. Most of all don't look at just the scale for your journey, do you measure? are you loosing inches? Maybe you are gaining muscle (that was a hard one for me to get my head around). The scale is just one tool in this journey. Don't get discouraged. You CAN do this!! I know you can.

Big hugs,
Kim

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BILL60 11/21/2014 8:13AM

    It's pretty difficult to gain 10 lbs while "almost" sticking to the eating plan. You most likely steered away from the master plans on numerous occasions and the price you're paying is a 10lb gain. The question is.....was it worth it? Was the pizza, pasta in your quest for a healthy you, the master plan must be the most important endeavor in your life. It can't be 2nd or 3d or fourth. It must be "NUMERO 1". If it isn't, it just won't work. Good luck and I wish you success.

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MSFROGGIE 11/21/2014 7:44AM

    I'm reading your blog and thinking . . . glad to know it's not just me.

Thank you for sharing MY thoughts!!

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The Good the bad and the Ugly

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

You almost think I should start out with the good.. but I am starting out with the bad.. which is I have been so off track or at least I feel that way.. last week I did not go to th gym at all to be honest I don't like the new gym I joined and thank God it was a pay as you go gym because I am not paying for November.. I hate being tied into a contract and this gym offers the option to pay cash or credit and work out and be done but not happy with the set up my old gym I worked it out where they will bill me monthly statement and i will pay.. of course it is 5 bucks extra but for me it is worth it. but any how I did not work out I ate like crap and it go really ugly.. by the end of the week I was bloated and tired and out of it..

This week I feel I am getting back on track.. but truth be told I am missing something that is lost . oh yea my motivation my determination my drive to lose weight.. I feel like my efforts are worthless meaning the more I work out the more I am squeaky clean the more I feel like I am not getting any where I can go weeks of working out eating wright and the scale dose not budge.. its the truth.. but let me eat a slice or two of pizza and bam there is 5lbs on.. its a vicious cycle and I am spinning my wheels I feel like I am on my spinning bike which I am doing everything right getting good cadence and my form is good I am at a target heart rate but I am not moving.. well you dont move on a spinning bike but that is how I feel with my program.. so that is the ugly of it..

The good which I will end with.. is that I don't want to give up... I can't give up.. I really really need to this and I need you.. and I need some kind of help, peace, or smack in the head.. maybe all of it.. so I am going to keep going.. that is all I can do ..

Thanks for reading ..

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BILL60 10/23/2014 9:23AM

    My recommendation is..... #1 get out of your routine and invent a new one, whatever it may be. #2 Be patient. It's gonna take a while to get real results. Have faith in the process. #3 Log your intake of foods. We have a tendency to under-estimate our intake. #4 Perhaps the most important is love yourself wether fat or slim. I wish you the very best, you are definitely worth it.

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DTHOR6 10/23/2014 7:34AM

    The last part of your blog not wanting to give up. Hold onto that part! You can do this! Do you have to go to a gym? Can you maybe find things to do at home that is just as good? Maybe buy some of those exercise bands for the weights part and do different exercises at home for the rest? I abhor gyms I can't stand other people watching my fat giggle. So I have a gym in my basement. It has taken me years to get it all but I am happy with what I have. I know that isn't an option for most but there are things you can do at home that are just as good as a gym. Do you have a wii? I love my wii fit games They really get ya moving and sometimes even make you sore.

Just a thought.

Hugs,
Kim

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 9:49PM

    I wrote this awesome response to your blog and it got lost in cyberspace. Ughhhhh.

I'm in the same boat you are in MsAnita. Or at least I think I am. I want to be healthy and I am going through the motions, but the motions aren't enough to make me lose weight or gain muscle. My motions are just enough to make me busy. I have no feeling about the motions either. They just are.

So, here I sit, letting all of my years of hard work turn back to fat and flab. For real. I'm not exaggerating. It's exactly what I said I wasnt going to let happen to me back when I reached my goal weight, but I just don't feel like I have it in me to go work my ass off.

I'm maintaining and I am staying busy, but I'm for sure not happy with where I am at right now. We just have to keep plugging away until that spark turns in to a flame!


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PIXIE-LICIOUS 10/22/2014 5:52PM

    Focus on the good! You are not giving up and that is awesome. Glad you don't have a contract with that gym, since you don't like it.

Motivation fades, but we just have to keep pushing on. Remind yourself WHY you want to lose weight and get healthy. If you're doing the right things and the scale is still not budging, then look for some non-scale victories.

Be proud of yourself because you are never going to give up!

emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 10/22/2014 5:52:22 PM

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1CRAZYDOG 10/22/2014 11:02AM

    The last part about not giving up . . . that's the important part . . . and trumps the bad and the ugly.

It's hard to go thru the motions w/o the passion, the fire. Wish I knew how to fix that. But all I can say is keep doing it and it WILL happen.

Hugs and smiles. Don't give up!

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MAMABEAR372 10/22/2014 8:36AM

    You and me both. I know the feeling. The motions are there but the fire is not. I am glad you don't give up. And are sharing your feelings. Just try try again. You can't do better than the best you give today. Unless it is the best you give tomorrow. I guess we just need to practice our patience, huh?
I am standing beside you in this. Some how some way we will move forward with our own things we want to change. I believe in you! emoticon

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SLIMMERJESSE 10/22/2014 8:19AM

    Good for you not giving up.

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It' Going good

Monday, September 15, 2014

It seems like I only blog when things are going bad or I am struggling but sitting here writing this and I can say.. Things are going good.. I have been really focusing in my journey ad my steps to weight loss. I am not stress eating or picking.. I have passed up bad carbs.. and have eat clean for the past two weeks.. is there weight loss? well one pound.. I mean can I get any slower?? but its a pound and not a gain, I think too its because I was not working out much last week, it seemed that I had no time I mean I did get on my spinning bike for 20 minutes but that was it.. so tonight I am hitting the gym..

I am planning on having a good week, my meals are planned I am armed with good healthy food in the frig.. I know I can do this

Have a good week everyone

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 9:48PM

    I wrote this awesome response to your blog and it got lost in cyberspace. Ughhhhh.

I'm in the same boat you are in MsAnita. Or at least I think I am. I want to be healthy and I am going through the motions, but the motions aren't enough to make me lose weight or gain muscle. My motions are just enough to make me busy. I have no feeling about the motions either. They just are.

So, here I sit, letting all of my years of hard work turn back to fat and flab. For real. I'm not exaggerating. It's exactly what I said I wasnt going to let happen to me back when I reached my goal weight, but I just don't feel like I have it in me to go work my ass off.

I'm maintaining and I am staying busy, but I'm for sure not happy with where I am at right now. We just have to keep plugging away until that spark turns in to a flame!

emoticon

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 8:25PM

    I wrote this awesome response to your blog and it got lost in cyberspace. Ughhhhh.

I'm in the same boat you are in MsAnita. Or at least I think I am. I want to be healthy and I am going through the motions, but the motions aren't enough to make me lose weight or gain muscle. My motions are just enough to make me busy. I have no feeling about the motions either. They just are.

So, here I sit, letting all of my years of hard work turn back to fat and flab. For real. I'm not exaggerating. It's exactly what I said I wasnt going to let happen to me back when I reached my goal weight, but I just don't feel like I have it in me to go work my ass off.

I'm maintaining and I am staying busy, but I'm for sure not happy with where I am at right now. We just have to keep plugging away until that spark turns in to a flame!

emoticon

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 8:13PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:33PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:31PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:28PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:19PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:19PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:18PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

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LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:17PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:16PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:16PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LUCKYDOGFARM 10/22/2014 6:15PM

    I know exactly how you feel MsAnita. sometimes you just want to get of the hamster wheel and scream. For me, it's almost all a mental game. If I truly get off of my behind and do the work with the best effort possible, I see results. Thing is, I just really am not giving it my all. So instead, I'm doing my best to maintain until I get back in to that mental state that is required for me to lose the weight.
Honestly, I have LOST most of my muscle this year. The flab has returned and it's mine. I own it. I don't really like what I see when I look in the mirror, but I don't have my head in the game enough to really care.
I still plug along and do races and get some mileage in, but cardio won't keep you going. I hope you get to the point you need to. Be at to make things start happening the way you want them to!
Hugs and Love!

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CANDOK1260 10/12/2014 9:45PM

    yes emoticon this

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LUCKYDOGFARM 9/24/2014 3:12PM

    A pound a week for a year is 52 pounds!


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JANETRIS 9/22/2014 8:51PM

    emoticon Way to think positive!

Comment edited on: 9/22/2014 8:52:11 PM

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1CRAZYDOG 9/15/2014 11:57AM

    emoticon

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PIXIE-LICIOUS 9/15/2014 9:11AM

    You're doing great! Don't focus on that one pound...focus on how you are feeling! After two weeks of healthy eating, you must feel great! Keep up the good work, the weight loss will happen.

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FATSOO51 9/15/2014 8:20AM

    emoticon emoticon love to read a positive blog. Sounds like you are doing everything right...I need to copy you :)


thanks
Nancy

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I am on the right track...

Saturday, September 06, 2014

And feeling good.. thinking back to when I first started a healthy living journey and wanted to lose weight I just started doing it I buckled down I stopped eating the junk and eating in between meals I just started to do it and it worked... most of you now I have been struggling for some time I have decided that I need to do something what was I doing so wrong or not doing that caused me not to lose weight.. well I knew I was a little on the laxed side and it was hard to stop but I think my main down fall is carbs so I decided it was time to do a 6 weeks no carbs plan.. I decided to cut up any kind of bread, oatmeal, and carbs .. it was very hard this week, but I got threw it.. and I was worried that I would cave this weekend, which last night family ordered pizza like I knew they would but I did not partake in it. Today has been good too I have ate clean all day worked out and took the dog for a walk..

Do I feel I am on the right track? yes. and I fearful I might get off of it? oh yea but for now I am going to keep doing what I am doing because I am so amazed at my self for sticking to it and staying strong I think the longer I do the better I feel and I will stick with it longer..

Wow love this feeling ..

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SNOWYOGA 9/9/2014 10:23PM

    emoticon

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CAPECODLIGHT 9/7/2014 6:58PM

    Sounds like you are on track for sure. Fewer carbs, the easier it is to manage hunger and cravings.

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LUCKYDOGFARM 9/7/2014 9:13AM

    That's is quite the undertaking! I admit, I am a carboholic! I ogle bread at the store. I admire your ability to go carbless. Keep it up MsAnita!

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1CRAZYDOG 9/6/2014 9:33PM

    Good job. You're HERE and blogging, so if you catch youself on that slippery slope, we're here for you!

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UKNOWITNOW 9/6/2014 8:08PM

  emoticon

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Back too.....

Tuesday, September 02, 2014

Work,....my goals.... my healthy living plan.. today was day 1 I would count it as and it went well, work was good kind of went fast.. got right back into the swing of what we do in the auction department at our local Public Broad Casting Station. made a great breakfast. packed a good lunch.. hubby made dinner which was a chicken stir fry over rice.. well today was my first day of no carb or low carb I totally skilled the rice.. just at the chicken and veggies.. after dinner got back to adding in some fitness which I have not done in 4 days..

And now for the kicker of the day.. I have not wore my black dress paints size 16w since April.. now you all know I had a hard time over the summer I was dreading to put them on thinking no way go get the 18s and put them on I put the 16s on and they fit.. like they always did.. I was like "oh ok.. I will take that" made me smile..

Bring it on Day 2

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PAQTEQ 9/18/2014 3:12PM

    I'm eating Low Carb too. I have been having great success with it. emoticon

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JLPEASE 9/5/2014 11:17AM

    Way to go with the NSV!!
emoticon

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CAPECODLIGHT 9/3/2014 8:51PM

    Have you ever tried quinoa? I just did this year and it makes a good sub for rice. It is not a grain.

So glad the pants fit - what a hoot!

emoticon

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LUCKYDOGFARM 9/2/2014 11:59PM

    emoticon way to go MsAnita! You get down on yourself way too much! The power of positive thinking goes a long way!
emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 9/2/2014 9:57PM

    Wonderful! NSV!

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GEORGE815 9/2/2014 8:07PM

    Glad the pants fit. Rice is hard to stay low or no carb for the day.

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