Wednesday, November 27, 2013
It is said that God will never put more on you than you can bare. I suppose there should be some comfort in that. For years I have watched as one disaster after another hit my life. I try very hard to lead a good life but at times it seems that somewhere somehow I have upset the universe and i get more than my fair share of tragedy. I dont know perhaps because I have had that strong up bringing I tend to find my way out. I know that at the center of my soul I am strong as I have been through enough that it would have stopped some in their steps. Sometimes things compounding on top of each other but somewhere I keep finding the strength to pull myself out of the depths. This takes a toll after a while. You start to wonder just how do you keep doing this. Last week as my body told me it had enough the universe decided I needed one more thing to deal with.
On Friday my husband comes in and informs me that he has last his job. Really one must try to find the humor here. Already having financial issues from my husbands journey into midlife crises, already dealing with his drinking issues , already on shaky ground the universe decided this would be an excellent time to put me in the place to where I am expected to be encouraging and supportive. I am expected to say all the right things as a wife it is my sole job to worry about his well bearing right. And then to top this off I am to host the most thankful of holidays. So by this afternoon there will be some 12 people collide on my already insane world. They will assure him that everything will be alright then in the shadows as always ask me what are you going do ? Hmm that is an excellent question I assume i will find the way out of this mess again that has been created by others and tell them you know it will be alright. However, I don't feel very thankful at the moment. And as if it isnt bad enough that he is beating himself up he is also sick with a cold. Now this is going to sound petty but why is that when men get sick they get to be babies. You have to remind them drink your fluids, take your medicine and ask in that very sweet voice do you need anything when you want to say suck it up lollipop it is a cold not the end of the freaking world. So I take the little pill to help my nerves, then 2 teaspoons of carafate so my stomach doesnt hurt as bad, the aleve so my shoulder can hold up to all that has to be done put on my very best smile sigh and say here we go again. Oh by all means insert the eye roll in here and throw in a hearty eye brow raise and be thankful that thanksgiving is only once year.
So now lets share a happy moment together. I will list at least 10 things i am thankful for so that I close on a happy note.
1. I have two wonderful sons that are doing their best to help me stay sane.
2. I have an awesome daughter in law that if nothing else has assured me she will beat up any one that makes me cry again. She really is a good girl.
3. My three grandchildren will be here with me today. two boys and a girl who are not old enough to ask what am i going to do. they just want another hug.
4. I made a humming bird cake for thanksgiving . How can you possibly be down when eating something called humming bird cake . it is my happy to myself as i love the name.
5. I have a home. There are some that dont.
6. I have SCC in my life . He is a wonderful person who really is on my side.
7. I am intelligent enough to figure out what has to happen next.
8. I am loved.
9. My gym told me yesterday that they will work with me through this time and help me keep my gym membership. Also I am thankful that noone would spar yesterday as it might have not been a good day to throw punches.
10. Above all else I am very thankful that I had two wonderful parents that raised with more than enough where for all to find the strength to continue to fight than to crawl up under the bed and hide.
11. My brother and brother in law who picked me up this past weekend and took me to their home which is comically called the home for wayward queens. Since it is in the country and very peaceful and almost all their friends visit them to just escape from life.
12. Every morning without fail my Brother in law sends me a text and says I love you . He says because he wants to make sure that i am told everyday by at least one person.
13. My sons pulled together and they bought the fixings for Thanksgiving . Haha now if i could get the cook it that would be great.
14. My oldest sons girl friend because she is so full of the holiday spirit and so much in love that nothing brings her down. She is so happy you can borrow from her if you need to lol .
15. We have a 401 k that will greatly help get through this time till we find employment again.
Although life sucks if you try hard enough you can find something good even in the bad. Or that is my story and i am sticking with it. Happy Thanksgiving everyone thank you all for reading my blog and all the encouragement and support that you have given me.
Dont worry I am not burning down house it was just better than lemonade