Saturday, March 08, 2014
Overcoming self-sabotage is one of the most exciting conversations you will ever have, because on the other side of it is the emotional freedom and depth of joy that you were born to have. And the process of breaking through denial, facing your fear, anger, and other difficult emotions, and making peace with your pain is going to lead - step by step - to an ending of the internal war with yourself so that you can step fully into the greatest expression of yourself. So let's begin...
Do you make a little progress toward your goals and objectives, only to backslide again into old, non-serving behaviors? Are you perplexed by how frequently you get off track and wonder, out of sheer exasperation, why? If you are not moving steadily in the direction of what you say you want, you can be certain that you are sabotaging yourself somewhere.
Whatever form it takes – whether unhealthy behaviors or limiting thought patterns – self-sabotage always diminishes the passion and energy we need to fulfill our dreams. Self-sabotage is the outer manifestation of our inner feelings of shame, anger and unworthiness. At the heart of the matter, we only create as much love, fulfillment, success and joy as we feel worthy of having.
To make radical progress toward that which you want, it is essential to identify how your inner saboteur is operating in your life. Choose one area where you can see that you’re sabotaging yourself. Perhaps it’s your finances, or maybe it’s in the area of your health or relationships. Ask yourself, “What do I get out of not thriving in this area?” (We are always getting something out of it). Propelled by negative beliefs about yourself, you may discover that you don’t expect to succeed in this area. So ultimately, you get to be right about yourself! And most of us will do anything to prove that we are right—even if it means robbing ourselves of our dreams.
However, today can be a demarcation. How will you begin to stop self-sabotage in its tracks? The action steps below will give you a starting point.
Take Action Now!
Make a list of five specific things you are doing to sabotage yourself.
Allow yourself to be ruthlessly honest. As you do this exercise, keep in mind that to have the best year of your life you will have to do the opposite of what you have been doing. This self-observation will guide you to then identify the five things you can do to counter the behavior patterns that undermine your success. For example, if you find yourself wanting cake in the afternoon, counter it by having an apple first. Do you routinely spend more than you save? You can counter this habit by putting five percent of what you earn in a savings account each week. Finally, as you make a list of these five new action steps, practices or tasks, choose one that you can accomplish today. And then do it with great love.
Friday, March 07, 2014
Slowly but surely I'm down 2 pounds.
A very long tiring Friday. Rather a bumpy morning Boss came into work rather disgruntled. She slowly evened out over the morning I "hid" n my office and stayed out of her path of wrath.
Canada post has been trying to pull a fast one on her Deeming it in their wisdom that she is over weight with her inserted flyers so they hadn't been putting them in the E-commerce mailbox holders. She found out about it and blew a gasket!
I can't blame her She pays postage to have them delivered plus printing them and they throw them out? It's illegal so now they are into her for money and won't repay So she is seriously thinking of taking them to court. She'd absolutely win!
Otherwise a good day very good day for sales and contacts.
Had my 4 oz white breast of chicken and salad for dinner. Trying to unwind from the day before bed A good glass of red fruit wine autta do it ya think?
Friday, March 07, 2014
The feminine energy of spiders reminds me that we have the ability to weave our lives into strong beautiful works of art.
Have you ever watched a spider?
We may not realize that the sight of a spider’s web glistening in the sun, the beads of morning dew catching the light to shine like diamonds on an intricate necklace, may carry a message for us. Their beauty belies their strength because though they are spun from thin strands of silk, they can hold the weight of the dew and capture nourishment in their nets as well. This paints an accurate picture of the traits of the weaver, the spider. Their feminine energy reminds us that we have the ability to weave our lives into strong, useful, and beautiful works of art. Though people may have an instinctive fear response to spiders, we can look beyond the physical instinct to understand the spiritual message they may be bringing us.
Among the various Native American traditions, spider medicine has been known to represent creativity. Her eight legs represent the four winds of change and the four directions on the medicine wheel, while her body is in the shape of the infinity symbol, which represents infinite possibilities. Spider was said to have woven the alphabet, creating the means for people to communicate and record their history through language. Just like the Greek myth of the Fates, three women who weave the tapestry of life, spiders are said to weave the creative forces that bring forth the intricately symmetrical patterns of our lives.
So if a spider has wandered into your line of sight, she may be bringing you one of several messages. She could be reminding you of the infinite possibilities you can draw from to create your life. Perhaps her message is to check your email or “the Web” to see if communication you sent has captured something. You might even want to refer to old journals to look for patterns recorded in your personal history. As spider weaves her web, you too can weave your reality and your future. Her medicine could be reminding you that as the creator of your life you need to have the courage to reach out and create your own intricately beautiful and strong tomorrows. If you don’t pay attention, spider may feel the need to bite you to get your attention. If this happens, investigate what that part of the body represents to gain further information about your message from spider medicine.
Saturday, March 01, 2014
Forgiveness is a very tender subject. It brings up lots of memories, emotions and desire in most of us. Forgiveness is the most powerful medicine found to heal the human heart.
I know I wouldn’t be anywhere near as happy and peaceful as I am now if I hadn’t discovered the miracles that forgiveness brings
It takes years to receive all of the lessons life experiences give us. It is in a sense, very hard work. Through forgiveness, I learned that the grace of God offers a more powerful love than what any human could give. It’s a love that never leaves, never gives up, and always heals when we allow it into our hearts. I also learned that my mother's love was perfect as it was, and as it is.
We all have different, painful stories that affected our lives. Perhaps you have quite a few of them! This course will guide you step-by-step, showing you a way to heal your painful memories by finding the spiritual treasure hidden within each one.
What is Forgiveness?
As I mentioned earlier, forgiveness truly is heart medicine. It involves the healing experience of Divine contact. The Divine has many names, including the Holy Spirit, the Divine Mother, Father God, Great Spirit, Nature, or the “peace that passeth all understanding.” Whenever I mention the word “Divine,” please substitute any name that works for you. The important thing for us to remember is the uniting, creative force of Love. Only this Love is real, and only Love has the power to heal and reunite us with our true nature.
I sometimes call our forgiveness journey a jump into the River of Love. and NO MATTER WHAT, the River of Love floats us home to a deep sense of inner security and serenity. This experience of forgiveness teaches us to release our sadness, and find gratitude for the lessons we’ve learned. It gives us the joy and freedom of knowing we are never isolated or without a friend. The River of Love shows us that the edges to all things are friendly…if we relax into the safety we share with the Divine.
In committing to make use of the River of Love on our path of freedom, we need to examine what this forgiveness is, and what it is not.
In the traditional view of forgiveness, a common element is that a transgression occurred. If there was no transgression, there would be no need to forgive! So if you feel that forgiveness is what is next for you, you’ll need to find the transgressions in your life story. By that, I mean any transgression that seemed to cause you pain, sadness, anger, fear, or other emotion that you did not want to feel at the time. It could have been as large as a rape or murder, or as small as a nasty look or icy silence.
I say “seemed to cause you pain” because it is never the events that cause us to suffer, but rather how we interpret the situation. It is possible for one person to feel great anguish over something that another person wouldn’t mind at all. Even dramatic acts of violence can have different effects on different people, depending upon what the people involved think about what happened.
We have a choice about how we interpret our surroundings and the intentions of others. We can choose fear or love. If we choose fear, which is how we were programmed at just about every level of society, then we will assume that an attack occurred, and a crime must have taken place.
For example, crimes usually involve violence of some kind. This could be physical, emotional, verbal, sexual or energetic violence. Perhaps a situation occurred where someone crossed your personal boundary without permission, physically attacking you or giving you an emotional stab. Probably, your first instinct was to defend yourself, retaliate, or withdraw. Each of these instincts stems from a belief that the attack was real, and that you are an individual person with an individual body. This is how you live in the World of Humanity, also known as the world of 3D or the world of duality, where crimes take place every day.
Once you were convinced that a trangression occurred, the people involved automatically fit into pre-arranged roles. We have a group agreement for these roles, which spans all cultures and socio-economic levels around the globe. We call these roles Victims and Perpetrators. Sometimes there is another role, that of the Savior – a third person who swoops in to (temporarily) save the day. For our forgiveness practice, we’ll focus on the Victim and Perpetrator roles, because they take us directly into our emotions, and that is the place to go for deep healing.
In traditional forgiveness, we keep these roles intact and try to heal. We say to ourselves, “I’ll just let bygones be bygones.” Or, “I’ll let the passage of time heal my aching heart. It doesn’t feel so bad anymore. I’ve forgiven him/her.” Or, “They had such a terrible childhood, they couldn’t help themselves. I feel pity for them. I have forgiven.”
The catch here is that we can’t gloss over the knots of constriction and pain that we made in our emotional bodies, back when upsetting events in our lives occurred. Especially when we were children, we didn’t have the emotional maturity to separate ourselves from our parents, peers and teachers. We didn’t understand the impact of the pain they were carrying when it was projected upon us. We dutifully took on the legacy of their trauma in an elaborate human dance that has lasted for untold generations. And the thing is, we’ll keep on projecting this mess onto our children and our grandchildren unless we stop the momentum. This is the most important stand we can take in life. We can say, “This pain stops with me.”
“To transform energies we must experience them totally, working through them and forgiving them, which means seeing the perfection in them.” — Colin Tipping, Radical Forgiveness: Making Room for the Miracle
Note: Forgiveness is the inner work that we do to increase our experience of freedom. It brings us consciously into the World of Divine Truth. In the World of Humanity, we also need accountability, responsibility for our actions, systems of justice, mediation, reconciliation, treatment programs, jails and prisons. This is the outer work of living together in an unenlightened society. These inner and outer levels are connected, yet distinct.
Almost all of us have wounds that need to heal. We can’t skip over the work that is needed to release this pain out of our minds, hearts and bodies. This is the blessing of forgiveness and the vital excitement of jumping into the River of Love. It takes us from isolation, fear and pain all the way back home to God. We simply cannot heal without learning to float within it!
When you do the inner work of forgiveness, remember that you are not trying to fix yourself, another person, or a situation. You are not looking for justice in order to champion injustice. You are not a savior or a victim or a perpetrator. Those are roles that you constructed. You are not bound by them, nor is anyone else.
What a relief!
We need to learn to simply witness what we are carrying from the past, learn from it, and let it go. We need to release the need to blame, shame or revenge upon anyone – including ourselves. This release will open up passageways that were blocked, perhaps for our entire life up until now. This means that all of the love and wisdom of the Divine will be available for you…now that you have finished your business of building grievances. The doorways, your inner meridians, will be open. You will begin to live inside miracles themselves, and to come to at-one-ment with our Creator. Life just doesn’t get any better than that.
“No more fearful dreams will come, now that you rest in God.” — ACIM, WB 193
What are the benefits of forgiving someone?
Research results cited here come from the Mayo Clinic. For more information, go to www.mayoclinic.com.
Evidence is mounting that holding on to grudges and bitterness results in long-term health problems. Forgiveness, on the other hand, offers numerous benefits, including:
* Lower blood pressure
* Stress reduction
* Less hostility
* Better anger management skills
* Lower heart rate
* Lower risk of alcohol or substance abuse
* Fewer depression symptoms
* Fewer anxiety symptoms
* Reduction in chronic pain
* More friendships
* Healthier relationships
* Greater religious or spiritual well-being
* Improved psychological well-being
How do you currently view forgiveness?
What prompted you to invest in this course?
What is your commitment to yourself about finishing it? Are you committed?
What value can you see in learning to forgive?
What do you want from forgiveness? What will you give to your process?
Are you waiting to be forgiven? from whom?
What emotions are rising up in you as you meditate on these questions?
Thursday, February 27, 2014
We can excel easier in our lives when our own spiritual, physical, and intellectual needs are fulfilled.
Within each of there is a well of energy that must be regularly replenished. When we act as if this well is bottomless, scheduling a long list of activities that fit like puzzle pieces into every minute of every day, it becomes depleted and we feel exhausted, disconnected, and weak. Refilling this well is a matter of finding time to focus on, nurture, and care for ourselves, or "you time." Most of us are, at different times throughout the day, a spouse, a friend, a relative, an employee, a parent, or a volunteer, which means that down time, however relaxing in nature, is not necessarily "you time." Though some people will inevitably look upon "you time" as being selfish, it is actually the polar opposite of selfishness. We can only excel where our outer world affairs are concerned when our own spiritual, physical, and intellectual needs are fulfilled.
Recognizing the importance of "you time" is far easier than finding a place for it in an active, multifaceted lifestyle, however. Even if you find a spot for it in your agenda, you may be dismayed to discover that your thoughts continuously stray into worldly territory. To make the most of "you time," give yourself enough time on either side of the block of time you plan to spend on yourself to ensure that you do not feel rushed. Consider how you would like to pass the time, forgetting for the moment your obligations and embracing the notion of renewal. You may discover that you are energized by creative pursuits, guided meditation, relaxing activities during which your mind can wander, or modes of expression such as writing.
Even if you have achieved a functioning work-life balance, you may still be neglecting the most important part of that equation: you. "You time" prepares you for the next round of daily life, whether you are poised to immerse yourself in a professional project or chores around the home. It also affords you a unique opportunity to learn about yourself, your needs, and your tolerances in a concrete way. As unimportant as "you time" can sometimes seem, it truly is crucial to your well-being because it ensures that you are never left without the energy to give of yourself.
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