Saturday, September 22, 2012
CPAP Streak: 11 days (and last night for the first night in literally months, I slept over 6 hours - 7.25!)
I looked at my weight goal report this a.m., and decided to reset it.
According to my previous goal - I would have to be at 236 right now to be on track. Needless to say, I'm not. I'm at 248 - that's 12 pounds behind and it's not motivating me, it's discouraging me so...I reset.
When I look at my reports, I'm constantly gaining and losing the same five to seven pounds. Literally, the SAME five to seven pounds.
I need to have a goal...some kind of goal....and I considered that getting to and staying at 240 has been impossible the last year, much less getting UNDER it?
So..I made the simplest goal I could - to get to 240. Yep, that's "only" 8 pounds. But it's past the 242 mark, which is the lowest I've been able to get to - and was only at a day or two before it comes up again.
I look at what I've accomplished this summer and I've done well. I've added a LOT of fitness into my week, I've made some good food changes, and I've started using my CPAP nightly. My body has changed, I've lost a good six inches.
And my weight has stayed within that same 247-254 range.
Maybe what's needed here is a small goal - eight pounds - something so close I can almost taste it, rather than something so far away I can't imagine it. So....we shall see what we shall see.
Last night was troupe night, and I had been so worried I wouldn't get the same workout as my walk. Wow. No worry. I was literally soaked in sweat - my hair was drenched, my clothes were damp, I had sweat running down my face.
The other thing I've noticed recently? A SIGNIFICANT decrease in appetite over the last two weeks. Coincidentally to my using the CPAP? i dunno. But enough that my partner has been looking at me suspiciously and saying "you aren't eating all your food...are you trying to starve yourself?"
LOL. nope. Just getting full really fast lately - well, really fast compared to "usual".
TEN DAYS TILL DISNEYLAND!
Friday, September 21, 2012
Since I worked 6 days last week, this week has seemed very loooong. Glad for it to come to a close.
CPAP Streak: 10 days
Countdown to Disneyland: 11 days
As discussed earlier: Dance is ramping back up again to 3-4 nights a week, it's getting dark much earlier and my walking time is being compromised. Still feel anxious about that. This week, due to intense smoke from forest fires in the area, I couldn't walk two of the nights I planned on - I did other stuff, but it's not the same. So my minutes/cal burn are down. No likey. But, it is what it is. I have a 2 hour class tonight and since it's been about 8 weeks since I've done anything like that, I know I'll be sweating my butt off, lol.
Weigh in - keep forgetting to mention that. Last week, when I returned from my long weekend, I was having a lot of water retention and the scale said I'd gained five pounds - I knew it wasn't "fat" and decided to let it roll off me and not stress. Yep, sure enough when I got on the scale this week, that five was gone and so were the two that had come back on previously, so I'm back down to 248. Whew. Change is good, but not in that direction!
Thursday, September 20, 2012
CPAP streak: 9 days
Yesterday was my appointment with my sleep doc. He's a nice man, don't know why I was so anxious about it.
What came out of the appointment:
1. It's been 7 years since my sleep study, and since I was non-compliant for 6.5 of those years, he has no idea where I "am". Is the pressure of 8 still good for me? Could we go lower? Do we need to go higher? So....another sleep study. If my insurance balks this will be an issue. Sigh.
2. I've gained 25 pounds since I saw him 6.5 years ago.
3. I have an appointment to get fitted for a new mask on Friday. He said there have been a lot of new masks come out in the 6 years since I got mine. Again, pretty sure the insurance isn't going to pay for it (haven't met my deductible). But, it needs to be done so..... yeah.
the issue is definitely quality of life here. I have to take a nap pretty much every day. I'm tired .... all the time. I do best on 7-8 hours of sleep a night, and for years I have gotten 6 if I'm lucky. So, I'm glad I went. I'm not looking forward to the sleep study, appointments with respiratory therapist etc, and when I think about the $$ it makes me a little nauseous. Yep, I have insurance but historically my part of it is always more than I can afford.
But...what price do we put on health?
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
CPAP streak: 7 days.
Last night? I wore it all night long. Took two Benadryl to do it, but the mask stayed on and I slept through the night - one or two times I surfaced as I changed position, but didn't rip the mask off.
That's all for today folks.
Monday, September 17, 2012
CPAP Streak: 6 days
I didn't make it long last night probably 3 hours. I have my doc appointment Wednesday and I'll be asking what to do about the ripping the mask off every time I start to change position. I'm not really awake when I do it, at least I don't remember doing it most times. Maybe a sleep aid? Dunno. We'll see what the expert says. But I keep putting it on night after night and that's the goal - so I'm doing it.
Today my schedule changes and that makes me nervous about my fitness minutes. My dance troupe has been on hiatus this summer and we're back on with biweekly practices starting tonight. Yes, it's trading one form of movement for another - I don't know why I'm nervous about it, but I am. When we were off...I would walk 4-5 x a week. Now we'll be rehearsing 2x a week. Yep, dance is movement, but it's not sustained movement. Typical rehearsals (especially in the early stages of choreography) are start and stop. Once we have the choreo set, we start running it over and over and that's less start and stop.
I guess I'll still aim to walk 2x during the week and see where things go. With work and family, adding in two 2-hour rehearsals eats up a lot of time in the week! Then, there's 1-2 private students a week and you know, laundry, LOL.
I'm excited for troupe to be back at it, and I need to just let go of worrying and enjoy it. It's movement and it counts. If I need to compensate by lengthening my walks a little I could do that, right? right.
See I just needed to work through my process, LOL.
Coworker on vacay this week which means office will be quiet, yay...but also means I'll be working my butt off to keep up. Um, yay?
Have a great week folks!
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