Friday, November 14, 2008
Do you know how long I've been on Spark? A pretty long time.
This a.m., when I logged in and looked around I saw posts that said things like "two months and 30 pounds lost!" Wow.
My lack of self discipline is showing. Really showing. Cause I'm back at my highest weight, EVER. There are some circumstances, an injury and upcoming surgery; stress out the hoo ha; depression. Yeah. Stuff.
But the big reality is I haven't been DOING it - again. I talk about it, I think about it, but I don't DO it.
Yesterday was day 1, for probably the 100th time in my adult life. I remind myself it is never too late to lose weight, never too late to get your health under control, never too late grow as long as I'm breathing.
So yesterday, I stayed within my calorie range and I know that because I tracked every bite that went in my mouth. My fat was too high; however, so I plan on making sure that today it is more in range. I've already eating a high-fiber, low fat breakfast and tracked it.
I made it through day 1. I'm going to make it through day 2. And day 3. And day 4. And all the other days, step by step.
Friday, November 07, 2008
Well, ms passive-aggressive pushed me one too many times this a.m., and I snapped and over-reacted...only to find out she was right about what she was going on about.
I feel about 2 inches tall.
Being the master that she is, she turned the tables immediately and had it looking like I am a raging bi-otch.
Yippee skippee. I'm so glad it's Friday.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Last couple of weeks have just DRAGGED!
Health: Still sick, wondering if it isn't Bronchitis. Yippee skippee.
Food: I'm trying really hard to eat "real" food...whole food, less processed food. That's my focus this week. Not to use my calories on fiber-less, vitamin-less, nutrient-less "food". Also working on removing diet coke from my day. THAT one is freaking HARD.
Emotions: Feeling okay, albiet a little snippy, lol. When the Passive-Aggressive Coworker asked me a question, then asked "are you sure?" Then said, "I don't think that's right. I'm going to go check with blah blah" I turned around and said, "Be my guest!" I was a tad snippy I think. After a couple weeks of her acting out (i.e. asking me how to do something, then doing it specifially different; questioning every statement I make; doing her own thing rather than the team priorities) I just opened my mouth adn let it out.
Possibly, I should do that more often than stuffing the feelings associated with that. I read lately about dealing with the PA personality and many said, "confront them directly. "That hurt my feelings." etc, because if they "get away" with bad behavior it only encourages them. If they think they might get called on their behavior, they will think twice.
maybe. Maybe not, lol.
What have you done lately to "stand up for yourself"? Enquiring minds wann know!
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
I'm sick. Like sick, sick. Goopy sinuses, chest congestion and pain with cough...I couldn't figure out what was "wrong" with me all weekend...I was apparently getting sick.
I don't pay enough attention to myself to even figure out when I'm sick! Years of pushing down my feelings, needs, even physical aches and pains have left me clueless about my own body and health.
So well trained in "put yourself last" - I didn't even recognize I was sick! That's just really annoying me right this minute! I've made some good changes - but I'm so out of touch with my own body it's not funny.
Love yourself first. I need it tattooed on my forehead (in reverse so I can read it in the mirror!). In fact, I'm going to post it on a sticky on my monitor RIGHT NOW! I spend 8 hours a day here for work - I remind myself of appointments, to do stuff, I guess I need to remind myself to care for myself!
What have YOU done to care for the body you are in today?
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