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Life and Death

Sunday, April 12, 2009

My last post here was 1/2/09.

On 1/13/2009, my dad died.

On his death certificate were three causes of death:

1. Congestive Heart Failure.
2. Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease.
3. Morbid obesity.

At the time of death, I suspect he weighed over 400 pounds.

I've been dealing with the grief, the details, the probate and then began taking 8 credits this term working toward my AA transfer degree, while basically working two jobs.

I set a goal for myself - to regain my health. At the doctor's office tuesday, I weighed 244 pounds. I am 5 foot and 1/4 inch tall. I've been chronically sick all winter, with sinus infections followed by head/chest colds followed last week by an ear infecton and a sinus infection. i'm worn down.

For those who bellydance, you will understand the dance goal I've set for myself is huge - attend a 3 day level I Suhaila Salimpour workshop at the end of September, and be able to DO IT. Maybe not perfectly or even test for the level, but to be strong enough and healthy enough to get through 3 days of 8 hours of workshop.

right now, I can't get all the way through one of her fitness fusion videos.

Today, I got up and did it anyway. For those who are Christian - today is the celebration of Christ's ressurection. It seemed a fitting day to begin my own ressurection - from the death of this body and poor health into the body I was created to have and the health I deserve.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 4/12/2009 1:44PM

    emoticonHappy Easter Sunday.
Many blessings coming your way for health and happiness and most of all for looking in the mirror and telling that person "You are loved."


emoticonNo more Fat Chicks for us! emoticon
We are hopping to our goal. emoticon

Glad you are back. I know you will work toward you good health now.

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MOMMA_GRIZZ 4/12/2009 12:13PM

    I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.

You are so right - today is the perfect day to start your journey. Take it one day, one step and one choice at a time. Celebrate each and every achievement - no matter how small you may think they are. Enjoy your journey.

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Life and Death

Sunday, April 12, 2009

My last post here was 1/2/09.

On 1/13/2009, my dad died.

On his death certificate were three causes of death:

1. Congestive Heart Failure.
2. Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease.
3. Morbid obesity.

At the time of death, I suspect he weighed over 400 pounds.

I've been dealing with the grief, the details, the probate and then began taking 8 credits this term working toward my AA transfer degree, while basically working two jobs.

I set a goal for myself - to regain my health. At the doctor's office tuesday, I weighed 244 pounds. I am 5 foot and 1/4 inch tall. I've been chronically sick all winter, with sinus infections followed by head/chest colds followed last week by an ear infecton and a sinus infection. i'm worn down.

For those who bellydance, you will understand the dance goal I've set for myself is huge - attend a 3 day level I Suhaila Salimpour workshop at the end of September, and be able to DO IT. Maybe not perfectly or even test for the level, but to be strong enough and healthy enough to get through 3 days of 8 hours of workshop.

right now, I can't get all the way through one of her fitness fusion videos.

Today, I got up and did it anyway. For those who are Christian - today is the celebration of Christ's ressurection. It seemed a fitting day to begin my own ressurection - from the death of this body and poor health into the body I was created to have and the health I deserve.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KEEPITMOVING 4/13/2009 1:26PM

    i'm very sorry to read about your dad's passing and am sad for you and your family's loss. something good did come out of it, though, and that's your own reawakening of self and how you need to provide boundaries and limitation in some areas, while exploring others. a new balance needs to be set, and only you can set it. you are worth every low-fat cheese ounce and drop of sweat you're doing to have. you know that's true. it's time for you. you deserve this and more. we're here for you, so hit us up. yours in sisterhood, nancy
emoticon

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AQUAGIRL08 4/12/2009 1:28PM

    Good luck on your journey to health!

Happy Easter!

Cyndi

Comment edited on: 4/12/2009 1:29:21 PM

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AQUAGIRL08 4/12/2009 1:28PM

    It sounds like you're very motivated! I know that you can do this. I'm here to support you if you need me. Start with baby steps so you don't get burned out. You've already done the hardest part - deciding to make a change.

Happy Easter!

Cyndi

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70 days

Friday, January 02, 2009

In 70 days, I will turn 45.

I have a lot of good in my life...I'm grateful for much.

My health is not where I want it to be, and certainly my weight is no where near. I can't wake up in 70 days and weigh 100 pounds less.

But I can wake up in 70 days and feel good, be healthier, and maybe just a little lighter. I have control of that in my grasp.

I'm trying really hard not to jump on the New Year's bandwagon, cause I've fallen off that ride too many times. But a 70 day marathon attempt at good eating...consistent exercise and practicing health? I think that's do able. Not even a tiny weight loss goal thrown in there. If that happens, hurrah. I'm doing it anyway. Cause I don't like the way I FEEL. I don't like the way I'm moving....like an old lady!

Here's to my 70 day adventure.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DUBLWHAMI 1/9/2009 9:02AM

    It is always good to be grateful - thank you for reminding me of this sentiment. I don't do new year's resolutions either, but let me take the time today to be thankful for having another year and to wish you a good one as well.

Kathryn

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JIBBIE49 1/3/2009 3:05AM

    Great HON. I'm working on an EASTER Challenge Team and so this is DAY #3 of 102.

Let's do this!

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HDHAWK 1/2/2009 2:00PM

    Good for you! Small steps are the way to build good habits. I started almost a year ago because I'm turning 50 very soon!

You can do it!

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Blown around by my emotions

Monday, December 08, 2008

One of the things that landed me where I am today with my weight is that I allowed my emotions to control my actions. There were times I was depressed and while some of that is hard to just "get over" - I allowed the day-to-day ups and downs of my emotions to dictate what I did food and health wise.

That brings me full circle back to "just DO it". Whether I "feel" like it or not. So I made sure I had my healthy breakfast this a.m., and in fact, made better weekend choices than usual as well. Often, I just do whatever I want on the weekend - sabotaging the week's hard work!

Trying to PLAN - exercise, food. When i don't plan...well, give it up cause it won't happen. Today is just one more day in a long line of days to try to get it right. I've started it right, now I just need to continue, whether I "feel" it or not.

What do YOU do when you don't "feel" like doing your program? How do you motivate yourself and "just git 'er done"??

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 12/8/2008 3:07PM

    I thought about that the other day, but then I realized that when my children were small, i would NEVER have stayed sitting on the sofa, If I thought one of them had gone out of the front door on to the street in front of our house. I would have gotten up immediately and went to make sure they were NOT out on the road ready to be run over by a car.

SO, I thought, it is no different than everything I need to do now. When I need to go drink my glass of water, or make my Yerba Matte Tea, or Green Tea, or grill my chicken in my George Foreman Grill, I know that I CAN make myself do what I need to do. It is just a choice.

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Daily nitty gritty of health

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

I've been trying to be consistent M-F on tracking my food. Not allowing myself to say, Oh, I've blown it today, I'll stop tracking. That is a recipe for disaster for me!

Then, several times a day - usually after I've added a food item, I click on the 'see report" button at the bottom of the nutrition page and see where I am with the little circle graph that shows your fat, carbs and protiens. This is very helpful to me to see where my balance is in carbs and fat. Then pretty much daily, I check the reports tab for my nutrition...so I can see over the last 2 weeks how often I've been in range, etc.

More than anything, this helps me be concious of what I'm putting in my mouth, good or bad. At least I'm not eating blindly. It also helps me think about portion sizes. Then, if I overdid the fat one day, I tend to be more concious of it for several more days...so that helps the awareness thing too.

I did some arm weights this a.m. and yesterday took a 15 minute walk. Far, Far less than I am usually capable of...but for right now in my surgery recovery - it has to be good enough. Small and consistent has to be the way to go right now. I've also took all my medications...got 7 hours of sleep every night the last 2 weeks or so, and worked all my hours at work. Those are HUGE things for me - so I have to look at those successes and not dwell on the scale.

My life is more than what numbers roll up on the scale.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JIBBIE49 12/4/2008 10:20PM

    Glad you did some arm weights. I need to get busy and do some too.

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