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Ouch

Sunday, January 10, 2010

I had plans for today. I still have 2 hours of dance class to teach....

and my arthritis is bugging the crap out of me. Every joint aches...After some Aleve...it's starting to lift, but I've lost a huge chunk of my day.

It was a reminder of many things.....I'm not 22 years old any more and able to push my way through physical obstacles. That this is a long journey and not a sprint - that keeps coming up and I'm tired of it, LOL. That my nutrition has sucked for years and changing it now is imperative, tho freaking hard. It was a reminder to be compassionate to myself - something I'm also not expert at.

Yippee skippee. Thank you modern drugs...I'm feeling better. Thank you Universe i'm able to have another day at working on my health. Thanks to my Spark buds who help keep me here and not wandering off into "this is too hard" land.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DANARRA 1/11/2010 11:14AM

    Glad Aleve did the trick! And thanks for your support this weekend. It was a tough one.

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today is catch up day..

Saturday, January 09, 2010

Catch up on math homework, catch up on housework, catch up on dance stuff, catch up catch up!

Yesterday from about 3 pm on at work, the fireworks rolled! it was ugly. really ugly, but I th ink there will be improvement in the workplace energy. It was also an opportunity for HR to really see and hear what i've been dealing with for months. When it was done, she took me aside and said I am sorry. I had no idea it was THIS bad! Hello!!!! Thank goodness she saw what I've been seeing/hearing for months. the next few weeks will be a lot of hard work to build us into a team again. yippee skippee... but it will definitely be an improvement over the rampant dysfunction we have going on now!

I was reminded last night of what a long process "health" is for me. I had troupe practice - which meant for 2 hours we danced our butts off learning a new routine. I was covered in sweat when we were done and I felt good...but it was another reminder of how far i have to go. Not in a bad way...just..."oh yeah....that's why I'm doing all this isn't it? so I don't melt into a puddle half way through troupe!" I truly think ( and desperately hope!) that by the end of term with water aerobics/yoga/dance, my stamina will be up. What would realy facilitate that is to lose some freakng weight! at barely over 5' and carrying 237...how COULD I have reasonable stamina? I'm pretty sure any weight loss would help!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JULIEIRENE 1/9/2010 3:05PM

    I am so glad you feel this has been a turning point in your workplace environment. I'm sure it will still be a bumpy road for a bit, but it sounds like at least now it's going in the right direction and you have some facilitation in the process! Congrats! And, good for you for sweatin' it out last night! Sounds like fun & a good workout! Keep it up - you're doing an awesome job!

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PRYDEQUEEN 1/9/2010 11:21AM

    You ARE doing it!

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TGIF

Friday, January 08, 2010

I can not wait for this week to be OVER.

Work stress is so high, last night I went home physically sick - I literally thought I would throw up. I took initiative by going to HR and telling her, I can't take this any more. The issues must be resolved or I'm going to LOSE it.

Doing good on food, not so much on exercise. Classes cancelled due to freezing fog, etc. Tonight, troupe - so I know I'll have some laughs and dance and that is a GOOD thing, as Martha Stewart would say!

Now, must work to earn pennies. Hope everyone has a GREAT Friday and if it isn't a great friday, don't eat over it (speaking to myself here just as much as you!)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TAPPY49 1/8/2010 2:28PM

    Well, you took the first step by expressing your concerns to the right people. TGIF, as well. I hope you can find some fun stuff to get into this weekend so that you put your mind off of work. Have a great weekend and good luck with things at work.

emoticon emoticon

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JULIEIRENE 1/8/2010 11:55AM

    Sorry to hear work is continuing to take such a toll on your emotional/mental well-being. That is really tough and I hope starts to improve soon. Good for you healthier eating even when other parts of life are creating stress! I'm sure adding in activities is going to help deal with some of that as well. I'm proud of you!

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Wednesday's post

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Like my title? It's catchy, isn't it? LOL. No creativity was used, obviously. Still somewhat sleep deprived tho not as bad as previous nights.

I didn't think I'd have a problem sleeping last night after my water aerobics class so didn't take a sleep aid. Apparently, wrong.

The class was FUN and a HUGE workout! I'm a bit annoyed that the tracker only gives it about 390 cal burn....because wow...again, huge workout for me. In fact, and this is somewhat embarassing, but I'll admit it...in the middle of the night my arms and legs ached so bad - muscle not arthritis - I had to get up and take tylenol! I was so exhausted at the end of the class, I thought for a moment I wouldn't be able to haul my butt out of the pool! I'm exceedingly glad I signed up for it - because it would be really easy to put it off when I wasn't in the mood! To get an A for the course, I have to attend 28 classes this term...that means 3 not quite every week - bet I'll see some improvement by the end of this term!

Yoga officially starts tonight, and I'm more excited than nervous now.

Work stress is....off the scale. They are letting someone go (baaaaad behavior) and others are being hauled in and talked to for their part in it....coworker among them. That means the tiny little room I work shoved in with 2 other women is going to be TENSE. So I brought fruit for snacks and ipod for break walking. Why, oh why, are women so incredibly ugly to each other? Really, I'm serious. Sometimes I can't STAND women, which is really pretty funny when you consider I'm lesbian, LOL. The cattiness and ugliness and just plain cruelty - just like junior high but these women are 35 and 40!!

Yowza.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IFDEEVARUNS2 1/6/2010 12:52PM

    Maybe we are more catty, but we are also more real with each other. A double-edged sword.....

which I bet you could balance on your head. I never could. SIGH

Comment edited on: 1/6/2010 12:52:36 PM

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DANARRA 1/6/2010 10:40AM

    Water aerobics!!!! How cool!!! I wanna do that now! Good job on planning ahead for the stress at work. You are so on it!!!!

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JULIEIRENE 1/6/2010 10:22AM

    Ha! You are so right about women. :) We need to do more supporting of one another and less tearing.

I'm so proud of you for your class - I think it was smart to register for something that really requires your attendance. I should look into doing the same! Let me know how you like your yoga class. I really want to start taking yoga but haven't figured out where or when yet. A friend introduced me to a site called yogatoday.com that offers a free yoga video online each week. I think I may give that a try first.

Good luck with your day!

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ANTOINETTA46 1/6/2010 10:20AM

    what a great blog! glad to hear that you had such a fun workout! i am thinking of signing up for a yoga class at my local gym. now i will for sure. have a fantastic day!

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Another 2 a.m. wakeup...

Tuesday, January 05, 2010

This is the fourth day in a row of waking up around 2-3 a.m. and not being able to go back to sleep. I have a funky form of inherited insomnia - as do two of my children. It hasn't happened a lot since I started going back to school...I was too darn tired, LOL, to wake up. But I guess my stress load has it up and active again. It's something I've dealt with off and on all my life....but it's not helping right now. Tomorrow night, a sleep aid.

Turns out you don't actually "do" activity classes the first day of class in college. Who knew? You have "orientations". So I did the orientation for the yoga and water aerobics classes. That took up 4 hours last night and so I got no Wii time at all yesterday.

Work stress is up about 200% due to dysfunctional workplace garbage. I'm looking forward to work today about as much as a root canal. Again, this is the kind of stuff that fueled my emotional eating all my life, so I'm working on being proactive and really planning out my meals and snacks to avoid any kind of binge. For me, that means no "just one" piece of candy or whatever, that typically leads me right over the edge and into the abyss. I'm also planning on taking my ipod and walking during my breaks - good for stress relief.

Still waiting to hear from the property management on paying rent late. We've been very good renters for 3+ years, I don't think they'll refuse it, but .... one never knows. Probably just charge me an arm and a leg in fees.....yippee skippee.

The week hasn't started out so incredibly great, but I feel good about staying on track emotionally and food wise. Missing working out yesterday is not the end of the world and most importantly is not going to be the beginning of a big break in exercise (once I get off the habit, it's too easy to coast along and not get back on it). I will be accountable by editing this post and remarking on my workout by the end of the day!

here's to a better Tuesday than Monday was....I sure hope so anyway...

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TAPPY49 1/5/2010 9:22PM

    Hello to a fellow insomniac. My mind can go spinning in the middle of the night, and boom, its 3am and I am still awake. Sounds like you have a plan together to take care of other areas of your life. Emotional eating is hard, but keep up the good work, even if you trip a little, forgive yourself. In 2010 you will be thin or at least healthier. Finances alone can keep you up at night. Good Karma your way and I hope everything works out. Thanks for your blog. Here's a virtual hug for you.
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