Saturday, October 30, 2010
This has been one looooong week.
- Worked 40 hours
- Mid terms!
- Taught dance classes Monday and Thursday
- Had troupe practice Monday and Friday
- Had private students Tuesday and Thursday
- Dishwasher broke Thursday night (won't drain - it's apparently clogged)
- Jodie's been gone since September, and has 34 days till she flies back
- My 14yo son was diagnosed with ADHD (which I expected) and Bipolar (which wasn't so much expected).
yeah. Pretty much that last one there..on top of the rest of it? Put me over the edge. Worry, grief, being told my kid has the highest anxiety the pyschologist has seen in an adult OR kid - ever... I feel guilty too. Cuz all this time, I thought mike was "just being a dick".
See, he hides it well. He's apparently really worried about being "appropriate" so he trained himself to look like everyone else. He hasn't really gotten in trouble..he's had some anger management issues since first grade and I was pretty sure he was ADD/ADHD - but he hasn't been out setting fires or doing "crazy" stuff. The kind of ADHD he has (ADHD-PI) is not typical for what people think of ADHD, he fidgets (a LOT) but he can sit in a class and not be obvious, he can appear "normal" - but INSIDE he is off the hook, brain all over the place....and he apparently has a problem with short term memory.
Add that he's amazingly smart...and you have a pretty amazing kid with a lot of problems who had some behaviors that his mom just thought he was being a typical arse of a teen age boy. Now I'm finding some of that he really couldn't help....and all those times he said "I forgot"...um, apparently he really DID forget.
So...he's been suffering in silence and I've been telling him to get it together...and I feel pretty bad.
Can't go back, can only go forward. But this week has definitely held some grief for me and concern over his future. he'll begin a med this week for the bipolar and once that's under control they'll fiddle with something for the ADHD.
I have burned about 1600 calories so far this week...and gained 3 pounds. My food hasn't been THAT bad that I should gain weight with all that burning, and I realized yet again, I'm not drinking more than 4 glasses of water a day. DUH. One of these days I'll make it into a habit, eh?
That's my week. Can't tell ya how glad I am it's Saturday!
Thursday, October 21, 2010
I admit it...I keep the TV on at night. With Jodie gone to take care of her mom in Louisiana, total quiet just makes trying to sleep alone worse! I keep it on the Food Network...I love Chopped, Good Eats, Unwrapped...The only downside? Every morning i wake up to a different infomercial. Usually, I shut it off at that point, but sometimes I just hustle into getting ready and I can hear it in the background.
Ads for skin care, Ronco products, Total gym...but this a.m. I got so ANGRY! This ad, I don't even know what it was for - I could just hear it as I got out of the shower...talking about "eat all you want! Eat whatever you want, exercise less...and lose weight!!"
What total crap! Is there any merit to whatever this program is? Oh, they have meal plan that probably would help someone if they had no clue where to start....a couple of exercise dvds come with it...it could help someone I'm sure.
It's the booming tag line of "eat what you want, don't exercise and LOSE WEIGHT!" it's such crap! The hard truth is - there is no magic pill, no magic combination of foods, etc. You have to eat less/move more. That's the real deal. But we (yeah I've done it too!) want a quick fix, a painless fix, etc. and we're willing to pay a lot of money to try it.
Move more, eat less. it's not exciting..It's not "new and improved"....but it's the way to go.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Under 240 this morning, for the first time in literally MONTHS!
All this calorie burning is ...actually working!
Great way to start my week!
Saturday, October 16, 2010
this was a CRAZY week...extra busy at work while being short staffed, more homework than usual, driving to and fro for teenagers....I was exhausted by the time Friday rolled around.
Things that went well:
I've burned 2000 calories this week - woo hoo!
I made my hours at work (this has been an issue due to slow down..hopefully that's over)
I turned my homework all in
Things that need continued attention:
Eating veggies went off track
Water went off track
wearing CPAP not consistent
Had an eye appointment and heard the lovely news I am aging, LOL, as if I didn't know that...I have a small cataract beginning in one eye and I'm going to bifocals. Sigh. aging sucks. but I plan on continuing to work on my health so I can be as healthy as possible for as long as possible!
curious how full dance class will be this week - I put out the word, if I don't have a minimum attendance, I'm going to have to cut the class. Lots of "oh no, we don't want you to quit!" but this is put up or shut up time. I've been teaching for years and didn't care whether that class made money or not, I teach for the love of it. But right now, working full time and going to college? I can't spend the prep time + the 3 hours on sunday on a class that is half full. It doesn't make sense to pay studio fees for a small class when I'm THIS crazy busy. So...i've put it out there...we will see where it goes. I'll keep my weekday classes no matter what, they are in my home, where I don't have to pay studio fees!
here's to another week of trying to get it all right!
Thursday, October 07, 2010
I love learning...I could be a full-time student if it paid better, LOL.
Doing school while working essentially a full time and a part time job...and with a family...is not always the easiest thing I've ever done.
Add in there "losing weight/gaining health" ...and everything is a juggle. Time is of the essence ALL the time..and it would be so much faster to hit drive thru for dinner on the way home than cook real food.
But, I'm working on it. I went to costco last night and stocked up on stuff for easy meals, including some the kids can just fix for themselves on nights I am too "done" to cook while Jodie's in Louisiana.
Of course, Jodie coming home next month or so will be a whole new experience, LOL...cuz since she's been gone to help her mom through chemo...i've quit diet coke, stopped eating out, started working out 5-6 days a week, and changed up what we're eating. jodie's a southern gal....and she eats southern. Fried everything and her idea of a veggie is corn out of a can, LOL.
I'm going to have to be strong in these changes when she gets back. Within a year of our living together I'd gained 45 pounds from fried food and eating out all the time. I got on the "food ride" and didn't get off. When I tried to do better, I got some resistance, LOL. So...it will all be an adventure.
I'm committed to gaining health, and losing weight...and I'm working on being strong in my habits by the time she gets home I can STAY there. No, she doesn't hold a gun to my head, but it's so much easier to go along with someone about food than to stand your ground day in and day out.
Fall allergies are kickin' my heinie. not sick enough to stay home, feel crappy at work. woo hoo. :)
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