NOREGRET2010   49,941
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Sunday - Day 2

Sunday, October 02, 2011

Adding one more goal for October:
Reaching for a minimum of 50 points per day on Spark People.

Having a goal for points keeps me on the site, reading, tracking, interacting..and that definitely increases my success.

Weighed in yesterday. Not particularly wanting to share, but I will, 249. At least it was under 250. I didn't want to weigh...but the reality is if I didn't I wouldn't have an honest picture of where I was starting the month from. I don't really plan on weighing again till November 1!! Seriously. I have too much on my plate to deal with the bouncing scale results.

Yesterday was a rare thing for me, a real day off. I work M-F, teach dance on Sundays (and 3-4 nights a week as well) and my weekends are often so full they don't feel much like "rest".

I took the leap and learned how to say "no" a little better, and refused a couple cake orders, and refused a new private student as well. I might actually learn how to stop piling stuff up on myself, LOL!

So, yesterday I quilted, I read, I made a real dinner, and I took a lovely nap in the middle of the day. Felt like Christmas I'm tellin' ya!

Today, I'll quilt a little...but the reality is chores, dance "work", and prep for the week ahead.

So far...October, you are lookin' fine to me!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MEAG29 10/3/2011 5:58PM

    sounds like you deserved it!

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DEGENNAN 10/3/2011 12:58PM

    I had a reality check on the scale this morning myself. Ugh. But like you said, hopefully that just means we'll be very happy on Nov 1st when we see a much different number there, one that will make us feel a lot more satisfied. You deserve major kudos for saying "no" and taking a day to recharge yourself yesterday. Hope you are feeling refreshed today and ready to tackle your challenges.

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SHAR140 10/3/2011 12:23PM


I'm glad that you got a day off!

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TERRYT55 10/2/2011 12:04PM

    It sounds like you had a wonderful day........the kind of day that renews your spirit! I hope you can find balance today between chores and some time to do what you enjoy.

October is looking fine to me's my favorite month.

Take care and have a wonderful day!

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IAMFRANSGIRL 10/2/2011 11:57AM

    Learning to say "no" was one of the hardest things I've had to do. I'm so glad you had your time for quilting...and even a nap? WOW!

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October 1 - Day 1

Saturday, October 01, 2011

Not day one of a whole new plan...or day 1 of a new program....only day 1 of picking myself back up and moving on ....again.

My theme for this month is "keep it reasonable...keep it steady". Can't go wrong with that, now can you?

Things are ...calming down. I say that with the greatest hesitancy because that's been about the time things would go crazy again.

My son seems to be settling down into his new school (therapeutic day school for kids with mental health issues) and I am cautiously optimistic this is going to be a good fit for him! He has an appointment with his psychiatrist Monday and after the last three weeks of torture, his therapist will also be there to strongly advocate for more medication. The psych has been reluctant to medicate him based on what "mom" says...and Mike is very good at "appearing appropriate". That's part of why he's been relatively successful in school thus far...he can appear appropriate, even when he's complete chaos internally. Now however, the therapist has witnessed some of Mike's behavior/breakdowns and it won't be just me saying "this kid needs HELP!!" So, again with the cautious optimism. I do understand why the psychiatrist is being conservative, I really really do. ......... But we live with Mike's "stuff"....and we are all needing something to change.

I'm still struggling with anxiety/stress and occassional chest tightness/pain, but with a clear stress test result I'm able to say to myself, "Okay, so your chest is tight and hurts a little. You are not having a heart attack. You've had tests to prove that your heart is great! Stop freaking out now". I went back into therapy to deal with my anxiety/stress and I'm working on keeping sane throughout the craziness of my life.

I'm 14 days out from (what is to me) a Very Big Deal in the bellydance world. I will share the stage with some big time people...and I'm pretty aware, I'm going to likely be the largest woman on that stage. That is intimidating in so many ways I can't express it. But I'm going, I'm presenting something pretty darn cool....and it will be what it will be. I'll write more about it this coming week.

Today - may have to go to work if coworker calls in sick for 3rd day in a row and I'm so sick of work I feel totally depressed when I think of going in! So I'm crossing my fingers she can make it today. I'm going to quilt. I'm going to dance. I'm going to take a walk maybe a walk/jog with my sweetie....and I'm going to have a Very Good Day.

Period. No exceptions! How about YOU? What are you doing this lovely first day of October?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SINABUNN 10/2/2011 2:22PM

    Hello, love! Long time no see! :) I'm back on Day One myself... and it's frustrating to be "starting over" so late in the game, but any other option is unthinkable. Moving forward!!!

Hoping the day school will work wonders for your son. I've taught in the behavioral health setting for 15 years now and have seen some miraculous transformations. God's honest truth, it's a road filled with ups and downs and nothing worthwhile is ever easy BUT the key is having (being) a supportive family. That alone works wonders and will often make or break a kid's therapeutic progress. Your son is so lucky to have that in his pocket. Can I also recommend, and I hope I'm not overstepping here, that you and your honey consider a few therapy sessions? There's soooooo much that you have to endure while wearing your brave face for his sake. I'd hate to think of you silently suffering while the emotional stress eats you inside out. I'm not a doctor and I don't play one on tv. :) Just wanting the best for you. Blessings to all of you!!

Comment edited on: 10/2/2011 2:22:30 PM

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KIMMYSOUP6785 10/1/2011 9:10AM

    Good luck with everything! I am on day 1 of an umpteenth time of trying to lose weight and get healthier also. Stay strong and don't give up. We can do this!

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MIMIDOT 10/1/2011 9:10AM

    Sorry you've been having such a rough time. Glad things are working out for you and your son. Good luck!

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IAMFRANSGIRL 10/1/2011 9:10AM

    I hope you DO have a very good day! I can't think of anything nicer than cutting up large pieces of fabric into little bits and sewing them back into...well, large pieces.
Best of luck with your presentation, what a lot of courage you have!

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October Goals

Thursday, September 29, 2011

September included a foot injury (still struggling with that), a friend's diagnosis of invasive breast cancer and double mastectomy, a coworker's life-threatening illness and subsequent extreme short staffing at work, my son started a new therapeutic day school...and promptly melted down, and believe it or not there's more....

I'm extremely glad to turn my eyes toward October...fall...and yet another new beginning on working on my health.

Once my foot injury got to the point I thought I might be able to start to run again soon...I realized it's now pitch dark during my normal running time and I've had a stinkin' hard time being motivated to go out in the dark (basically no streetlights here). So I need to change that routine around to a daylight time that I'll actually DO it. Still working on that one. I'm still struggling some with the foot, good days and bad it's not an immediate thing. Meanwhile, I've been using that 25-30 minute spot in the morning to do some dance...

so back to goals:
In October I am going to....
1) Track my food!
2) Get 30 minutes of movement a day
3) Take my meds, vitamins and supplements DAILY, as they were intended....
4) Work on relaxation - doing something just for me every single day, even if it's just reading a book for a few minutes....
5) Drink more water!!!
6) Stop to think before I add things to my calender or to-do list!

Compared to my usual goals..these are pretty mild. I like to make big splashy goals then wonder why I burn out after a short time....trying to avoid that!

Good riddance September...welcome October!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DEGENNAN 9/29/2011 4:46PM

    I am going to use your goals as inspiration to make my own list. I will try to blog about it tomorrow if they are going to be October goals. Thank you for being an inspiration to me! And good riddance to the trials and tribulations of September, indeed.

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New Start....

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Results of my stress test came back...I had some sinus tachycardia during the treadmill portion of the test but the bottom line was "very low risk for hard cardiac event".


I'd put off doing C25K since the "heart attack" I can restart. I imagine after almost three weeks, I'll be starting right back at square one, but at least I CAN start again!

Stress management must be a priority...because obviously my stress/anxiety is getting to me if I end up in the ER thinking I'm having a heart attack!

To that end, I'm working on BALANCE...doing things I enjoy....Not sweating the small stuff...etc.

In weight news, I'm down to 246 again...and the again is important. Still messing around with essentially the same 5-10 pounds. I'm not getting excited till I can get under 240 and STAY there.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TERRYT55 9/28/2011 2:06PM

    Happy the stress test turned out well.........

I hope October treats you better than September did. Just hold on until Saturday emoticon

I have been playing with the same ten pounds's like I am afraid of getting to my goal weight. I know we can both get to our next goal.


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KELLYDRESCHER 9/28/2011 10:36AM

    Welcome to the 240s! I'm glad to hear things are looking a little better. I'm a stressed out person too, and I've been working on it my whole life. I've got no magic answers, but try everything they suggest.

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So...this is a stress test....

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

(yes, I had a LOVELY weekend away! More about that later perhaps....)

Today was my stress test. I arrived, they started an IV and injected a radioactive-type dye. I then waited for 45 minutes while I drank 16 oz of water. Then I had films taken of my heart over a 15 minute period where I lay as still as possible with my arms over my head. Back to waiting another 30 minutes and more water. Then I was called back for the treadmill portion. I was hooked up to numerous leads, a belt around my abdomen, and a blood pressure cuff. I got on the treadmill and the test began. 3 minutes at low incline, followed by three minutes at next level...and then 3 minutes at my target heart rate. Those last three minutes were HARD. I wasn't sure I could finish..and if I didn't finish, I'd have to go to a second type of test. So I was determined to finish! I did make it but wow, was I huffing and puffing! the last minute of the test, they injected a second dose of the dye. I then got to go out and wait about 30 minutes and finally have something to eat. Then back to the film room for another 15 minutes of films.

Nothing but the actual treadmill was hard. I fully expect I will hear back in a couple of days that my heart is fine and that my episode last week was likely brought on by stress and by the way, here's our bill......

I am, however, more committed to my health than ever I think because of this. Tomorrow, my friend will have a double mastectomy for treatment of her cancer. My other coworker has had 8 surgeries in 10 days and remains in critical condition. Health is a GIFT and one I want to cultivate to the best possible level for myself!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

3RDBABYWEIGHT 9/15/2011 10:16PM

    Wow! Sounds very interesting and I'm glad you got it done also.

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DEGENNAN 9/14/2011 3:04PM

    So glad you gave yourself this gift of the stress test and I hope you get the results soon. No matter what the result, if it has helped you make any positive changes in your life, then it was worth it. Hope you are still being good to yourself, making time to pamper and appreciate your gifts, and that you include healthy choices as part of that pampering.

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