NOREGRET2010   44,815
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Day in, and day out

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

In my inbox this a.m. was a Spark email about why sometimes we don't lose weight when we're doing all the right things....it talked about the perception you are burning more calories than you really are, or that you are eating within your calorie range when really perhaps you aren't, but it also mentioned various health issues and that sometimes, well, there doesn't seem to be a good reason why you aren't shedding the weight when your workout buddy is losing weight every week.

I haven't been on the scales in a week or so and I'm still not keen on the idea of weighing often - I've said it a hundred times here, I get too obsessed with the numbers and allow them to influence my mood, my feelings of success and unfortunately sometimes what I eat.

The weight is not falling off. It's quite stubbornly staying on. I have to say however, in the face of giving up a daily carb-loaded diet in favor of a wheat-free diet with an emphasis on trying to eat veggies instead of grains and staying the same weight, and doing a reasonable amount of exercise weekly....tells me I'm doing something right.

Wha? you may say, Huh? You aren't losing weight but you're doing something right?

Well, yeah. How do I know this? I know it because....I feel better. I'm smaller, even tho I'm not losing pounds on the scale. People are beginning to tell me I'm looking good. I'm feeling stronger. So, I know I'm doing something right....the scales are just a lousy way for me to measure that success. When I did my "bootcamp" class last night, in the face of about 9 million squats....I was able to do *almost* all of them. I made it through all of the crunches/ab work repetitions/sets. I was able to do 99% of the drill work of the dance portion.

I read a book this week by Bertrice Berry. I don't remember the exact name something like a Year to Wellness. It was provided to my job with some other leadership/motivational materials and I snagged it to read. She talks a lot about taking a year to get WELL...and in the course of that year, she shed an amazing amount of weight. The first and most important part of her process? Loving herself. Just as she was. Loving the fat thighs that have carried her where she wanted to go, etc.....followed by weeks of intentional choices, learning from mistakes, etc. It struck me because it was a very kind and gentle journey of one woman....and it made profound changes.

Right now, I feel good. My arthritis is lessened immensely after leaving wheat behind and I'm making progress, I know it, I feel it. What the scale says is irrelevant to that progress.

My, I'm all introspective today, eh? Lastly, let me leave you with an app suggestion. Now, I'm not an app person, LOL, even tho I have a SmartPhone. Believe me, the phone IS smart and it wins against me all the time, LOL. I have a dance coach client who has created (separate from dance) a wellness/fitness website. I won't tout it here, because frankly I prefer Sparkpeople and Spark is FREE and has community etc. BUT...one of the things they created in conjunction with their site is a FREE Water Coach App. I downloaded it to my phone and the little bugger, um, "tool for success" goes off from 8 a.m. to 8 pm to remind me to drink water. If I log water, it pushes the alarm back. I also have the option to not have the alarm and just track water there on my phone. Water is a huge difficulty for me, so having an annoying, um, helpful, reminder on my phone is helping me build that water habit. Again, it's free. You can search apps for "Woojabooty Water Coach". You can also check out the Woojabooty site, but I'll be frank, spark is better for me personally and free.

Have a great Tuesday...

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KATCHAGIRL 7/25/2012 1:12PM

    GREAT read! Thanks for posting. One of the things I try to keep in the top of my mind when I am working hard and the scale isn't showing it, is, at least I'm maintaining and not gaining 100's of pounds. It helps to keep me somewhat motivated.

I agree with you about not needing to actually loose the pounds on the scale to know you're doing something right. When I am on my exercise routine, I just FEEL soo much better, all the way around and I can tell that I am loosing inches. Ohhhh how I wish I could just STAY on the exercise routine! LOL

That's GREAT about that water app! I do hope it's helping you... I know you struggle with drinking water. Keep on tryin'! :)

Have a WONDERFUL rest of the week!

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TERRYT55 7/24/2012 9:59PM

    Terrific that you are feeling good and are on the right track. I agree about loving yourself ........warts & all, fat thighs & pendulous belly etc. When I started on my journey I didn't love myself but as the weight came off and I got stronger through exercise I found I was liking myself better. Eventually I even found I loved myself and it seems to help in keeping most of the weight off. I do keep gaining and losing the same ten pounds.......guess 10 is better than 100!

Happy things are looking up for you.......Take care, Terry

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MOLLYEEEEE 7/24/2012 1:02PM

    I've noticed I tend to lose better when I remember to drink water, altho that water coach could annoy me! You might be gaining muscle which weighs more than fat but keep up the good work & the lbs will eventually drop off.

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GOULDSGRANITE 7/24/2012 10:57AM

    You are on the right track!!! Keep up the marvelous work! I remember for like 50 years not tracking or caring about the nutrients in my food! Now I track, run reports, make small changes and KNOW that I am getting better everyday in spite of my stubborn scales! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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"Huge...just like YOU"

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Oh good grief.

I had to run to the store on my lunch for a couple of things I'll need for dinner tonight. Who do I run into, but woman associated with the local dance scene.

When she sees me, she grabs my arm and says "I had a dream about you the other night!! I dreamed you lost a lot of weight! You were so happy you had tears in your eyes and I was so happy for you I cried too!" (this from a woman who has been extremely snide to me more times than I can count).

I didn't know what to say to that, so I said "oh, well....hmm, sounds like a good dream!" She then says to me "Did you have that birth control they put in your arm and leave there? My daughter had that and she ballooned up, just HUUUUUGE, just like YOU. She could never lose the weight after that...she just got bigger and bigger, LIKE YOU".

I made my escape. Do I think she was being "ugly" to me? No. I think she was thoughtless and entertained by the sound of her own voice. It was just one of those interactions that obese people have...that make you sad, hurt you, make you angry....and always enforces to me just how helpless I feel at times.

Nope, not gonna jump off a bridge or anything, LOL, nor jump into a Twinkie truck....just had to get it off my chest so it wouldn't fester there and make me feel bad the rest of the day.

People. Sheesh.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TERRYT55 7/20/2012 3:44PM

    I read this blog a couple of days ago and it's been rattling around in my head ever since. It's hard to believe how insensitive and idiotic people can be. You handled it so well.....first in not decking this person, second in staying away from any bridges and third in avoiding the Twinkie truck.
Happy you got this off your chest and am hoping this woman never darkens your path again.

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EGALITAIRE 7/18/2012 1:25PM

    People can be insensitive.
I try to not take those things personally, with varying degrees of success.

When I do get upset about the comments of others, particularly from people who have no importance in my life, I have to ask myself why I would let someone else be in control of how I am feeling. Which leads me into an internal discussion about wanting to own my feelings.

Stay Strong

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SUSIEQ911 7/17/2012 9:08PM

    What a moron! I bet she has no inner monolgue either!


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CHRIS3874 7/17/2012 8:55PM

    Some people never bother to check if their BRAIN is engaged before putting their MOUTHS in gear. My MOM is like that - it used to drive my (departed) Dad crazy.

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BECKYSRN 7/17/2012 6:26PM

    What a friggin' idiot! Talk about extreme case of foot in mouth disease.... emoticon

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TRYAGIN 7/17/2012 4:40PM

    Wow, you handled that well to not let that get to you.


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MISSB8604 7/17/2012 4:29PM

    What in the world?!?!?!?!?!?

Idiots, IDIOTS.

Keep up your healthy lifestyle and ignore her comments!

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MOTTAMAMALOU 7/17/2012 4:21PM

    Now that was rude! But you endured with grace.



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ROCKINMOM776 7/17/2012 4:08PM

    'Wow, that's amazing... I had a dream I got skinny and became a fat-mouthed witch, JUST LIKE YOU!!'-- would've probably been what came out of my mouth... but you did the right thing. We usually regret the things we say without thinking (unless they're emotionally bankrupt, as crzyhkr81 said). You took the higher road, and that's awesome.

These people are just in our lives to remind us who NOT to become. You stay on track, you can do it!!

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CHEETARA79 7/17/2012 4:06PM

    Wow that is so rude. It sounds like you handled it really well! Maybe she only feels good about herself when she's putting down other people?

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CRZYHKR81 7/17/2012 4:03PM

    Wow I feel really sorry for her because she is either emotionally bankrupt or really dumb and either of those options are bad. First of all Huge and just like you should never ever go together. I am proud of you for sparking instead of eating a big mac! emoticon

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Friday Check In!

Friday, July 13, 2012

Well, let's see - wow time has passed quickly since my last journal post.

Remember when you were a kid and summer lasted FOREVER? Now I'm "old" and I'm having a hard time understanding how we got to July 13 SO FAST!!

Food:
All in all, been doing really well! Sort of been going with the concept of "replace carbs/starchs with veggies" and that's gone well. Overall, I'm wheat free with an occassional indulgence (which usually leads to gastric distress of some sort - so it's getting easier and easier to avoid the wheat completely!).

Working on adding veggies to every meal, even breakfast, which for me has been a bit of a challenge. Fruit? You betcha, happy to add fruit always, but veggies? um. Not so easy. So I've been focusing on that.

Exercise:
Adding in more activity on the weekends, and when it's not scorching, walks with my partner (gotta get ready for Disneyland in October!). Slowly working on adding up to 5 hours a week exercise. I can easily hit 3, consistently getting 5 in has been a problem.

Weight:
Pretty much stationary, lost about 2 pounds in the last few weeks. I haven't measured recently, but I am definitely noticing changes in my body, how it looks and how it feels. Nothing amazing - my pants aren't falling off, LOL, but I can SEE differences and that's pretty darn cool.

Overall, I feel so much better eating this way. Makes it much easier to do it!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GOGETFITJULIE 7/14/2012 1:32AM

    I love that: "replace carbs/starchs with veggies" -- never heard of it before. Just shared it with my wife. Thanks for the idea!

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TERRYT55 7/13/2012 5:56PM

    YAY for Disneyland in October! So looking forward to meeting you.

Veggies would be a breakfast challenge for me too. I usually start my day with plain Greek yogurt, berries and almonds. I like GRACEMCDOG's idea of the frittata.

Happy you can see differences and are feeling better!

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GRACEMCDOG 7/13/2012 4:30PM

    I made something for breakfast that turned out really good: slice up a zucchini and saute it in butter until it's golden on both sides, add some fresh chives or chopped basil. Using 1 or 2 eggs per person, stir them up with a fork, add your cheese of choice (I used cubed Gruyere). Slide the zucchini slices to the outer edge of the saute pan and pour the eggs and cheese in the middle. Cook for a couple minutes until the bottom of the frittata starts to solidify then pop it under the broiler until the top gets done and a little golden. Season with salt and pepper.

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DOLLFACEDX 7/13/2012 11:35AM

    Your last statement says it all - you're feeling much better overall. The weight loss, etc. will follow - keep up the good work!!
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And here it is Monday again....

Monday, July 02, 2012

I was thinking of Mondays. Of how my mom was on a perpetual diet - that would always begin on Monday. "Oh well, I'll start Monday...." was something I've heard not only from her but so many over the years..often being said on a Friday night...during a holiday etc.

What's one thing I've learned? Don't wait till Monday. Giving myself permission to pig out for 2 or 3 (or more!) days with the expectation that on Monday I would be magically motivated and able to jump right into whatever food plan I'd decided on...never benefited me in any way.

I've spent 3 of the last 4 weekends on the road at dance events. If I'd let those weekends "go" and planned on reigning myself in on Mondays I sort of shudder at the "cost".

Frankly I'm not losing weight right now for a multitude of reasons. But I'm not GAINING weight either. Run wild on the weekend and that might change, LOL!

Was I uber strict on my trips? Nope. I had an "adult beverage" on one of them, had a dessert on one or maybe two. Had drive thru coffee on all of them, LOL. But I didn't run wild. Each weekend, I used less and less wheat - until this weekend, I believe I was pretty much wheat free unless is was lurking someplace I didn't realize it.

And I didn't feel deprived or hungry. I enjoyed myself, I ate good food, and I didn't binge with the attitude "oh well, I'll start on Monday".

Sometimes, it's really tempting. Tempting to just let go and do whatever I want for a day or two...or three...or... yeah. I don't expect perfection out of myself, I've learned the hard way, it's not happening! I've been working on making conscious choices - and living with the consequences.

Today, I just don't like the consequences of waiting till Monday (or after the 4th, or whatever your thought process is). It's really just not worth it to me anymore.

I'd rather feel good....and not have the guilt, the bloat, the misery of waking up Monday hung over from binging or eating "food" that makes me sick.

But once again, I sure notice those mindsets haven't disappeared from my thinking, have they? or I probably wouldn't have written this post.....

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUSIEQ911 7/2/2012 1:59PM

    emoticon I completely agree with you.

Why do we keep waiting?

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MANDYLOVE_76 7/2/2012 12:12PM

    emoticon

I have to watch myself on the weekends too!

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Never Again!

Friday, June 29, 2012

I have a guilty pleasure - YouTube Makeup videos. I subscribe to a few "gurus" and enjoy watching them in the morning when I have my coffee.

Today, one of them lead to a YouTuber who was unpacking her first MediFast shipment. The thought processes that went through my head in just the 2 minutes of it that I watched were amazing.

"hmm. maybe I should try that again" (WTH??? WHERE DID THAT COME FROM? - but honestly, it DID go through my brain first thing).

then....

"Sigh. I've done that already. It was the same thing - I lost about 20 pounds then got stuck, then couldn't afford to keep going and ended up gaining it all back plus some."

Then.....

"Good grief, what am I thinking? Why am I even watching this? I know full well I don't EVER want to pay someone for fake food again. Just say no!!" and I ended the video.

This is not to say I don't respect people's choices to try this and I know it works for some folks. It didn't work for me. And the harder I tried, and the lack of weight loss made me feel really BAD about myself. I was spending $ I couldn't afford and I STILL wasn't losing weight.

But, isn't it funny that my first thought was "hmmm....."? I think that mentality (what can I try next?) is definitely somewhat responsible for the start/stop journey I've had.

What's my TRUTH? My truth is this: It's taken me about 12 years to get to this weight. My hormones are all effed up - and I know this from a lot of expensive testing, not guessing. I'm hitting that lovely menopause phase where losing weight can be a real booger anyway. I am insulin resistant. I work a very sedentary job.

Losing this belly is going to take time. It's going to take dedication and more good days than bad days. It's going to mean continuing to avoid the wheat/grains that puff me up like a balloon.

I've tried the quick fixes, and they didn't fix anything. I'm in this for my LIFE. My vitality my health my life. I will continue to enjoy REAL FOOD - fruits and veggies, hormone-free antibiotic-free meats and proteins.

Whew. I feel like I sort of dodged an emotional bullet this a.m. I could have chosen the fork in the road that said "Here for quick fix (and quick disappointment!)".

never again. Period.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LADYLARAN 7/1/2012 4:07AM

    Reading this reminded me of the "Road less traveled" by Robert Frost. So many people try the easy route, spending money and making other people rich, when the journey to weight loss isn't so much about losing weight as it is about finding yourself and creating healthy habits while building a positive self esteem.

We're taking the road less traveled and enjoying that journey.

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GOPINTOS 6/30/2012 9:01AM

    Fantastic decision for you & your journey! We can do this together!

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Smile and Enjoy the Rest of Your Day!
Melinda (gopintos)
Wheat Belly Team

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GRACEMCDOG 6/29/2012 1:44PM

    I can no longer remember when I finally, totally understood that

THERE ARE NO MAGIC BULLETS

It might have been when I was in my 30's watching one of my best friends try every external pressure available on the market (if you are interacting with anything 'marketed' you can expect to fail. Soon.) to quit smoking. She'd been smoking for over 50 years. She'd had to give up a brilliant career as a symphony bassoonist when she lost her teeth to gum disease and started developing emphysema. She nearly died during a 2 week battle with pneumonia complicated by lung damage in which she lived in an induced coma on a respirator. She tried hypnotherapy, revulsion therapy, and a number of other, expensive 'stop smoking' gimmicks. She was one of the smartest people I've ever met but even after nearly dying and swearing an oath to everyone in her family and group of friends that she'd never smoke again...she was asking me to go buy cigarettes for her within a week because she couldn't walk as far as the corner store. I wouldn't do it but she found people who would. She NEVER internalized the knowledge that until she really wanted to stop smoking more than she wanted to continue smoking, there was nothing on Earth...no externally imposed pressure...that would make her stop or make her want to stop. Two days without nicotine and she would always look at me and say "I feel like I've lost my best friend." You have to squarely face the fact that you are addicted and then decide if you want to continue to allow your life to be ruled and diminished by that addiction or if you would rather find the strength to kick the SOB out of your life forever and reclaim your body, your mind and your true spirit.

But you have to decide and, as you say, do the work. No one and nothing can do it for you. Once I found out about the addictive characteristics of sugar and wheat there was only one way forward for me. I will never look back. Even as a post menopausal female with thyroid disease the benefits have been enormous. You can do it. And when you're truly committed there is no longer any internal struggle. emoticon

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