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Perfectionism is Banned for December!

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Here's the deal: perfectionism is a set-up for feeling miserable and bad about oneself. Whether that perfectionism centers around making the holidays perfect, or perfectly sticking to a food and exercise plan, there is little chance of actually achieving the level of perfection.

There are goals that are SMART. SMART is talked about in success cultures everywhere, from management school to SparkPeople to whatever plan/program you happen to follow. The acronym varies, but these work for me "Specific", "Measurable", "Achievable", "Realistic" and "Time-bound".

Example:
During December I will stay on my food plan 6 out of 7 days each week.

See, specific, measurable, achievable and realistic (6 out of 7 allows for a little mess-up from time to time), and time-bound... during December, during each week.

I believe there is a place for aspirations that are not SMART. Example: During this day I will be kind to myself and nurture the needs of my body, soul and mind.

While time-bound (this day), it's not specific and measurable - "be kind" - what's that mean and how do you measure it? Still it's an aspiration, a hope, a desire - and desires are prayers.

May you all have a wonderful today, live in the moment, and be kind to yourselves... for you are worth it!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSLZZY 12/2/2009 2:19PM

    Excellent advice! Thanks for sharing! emoticon

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KALIGIRL 12/1/2009 4:07PM

    This is great - here's to SMART goals!

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NELLIEC 12/1/2009 2:00PM

    I used to be very perfectionistic -- and it didn't get me very far! I am now kinder and gentler with myself and others and am much happier for it!!!

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SMARTIEBEE 12/1/2009 10:47AM

    Wow Barb! That was a wonderful blog! Words I really needed to hear this time of year! I try to remind myself that I am not perfect, just human, but it is good to hear a way to make my goals more realistic and attainable!

Thanks Barb!


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DHENDLER 12/1/2009 9:25AM

    I love love love the SMART lesson! I added it to other wise words you shared.

emoticon Thank you for being a mentor and taking the time to thoughtfully share timely advice with all of us. I know I speak for others when I say it's been very appreciated.

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SUNNY332 12/1/2009 8:31AM

    That is why I love WW. It gives you a little extra for that one special day a week for a nice dinner out with DH or a holiday party. Knowing I have that extra helps me stay focused.

I am back on track today and not beating myself up. I do not expect to be perfect nor do I expect to get the results someone in their 30's might get from diet and exercise. I am content with doing what I can today on my quest of excellence for me. Today, I am healthier than I was a year ago and that is something to celebrate.

Have a Blessed day and thanks for a great blog.

Hugs, Sunny

Comment edited on: 12/1/2009 8:31:50 AM

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FIREBALL_V 12/1/2009 8:11AM

    Great idea!!

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SHIRLEYDILLARD 12/1/2009 8:06AM

    Thanks for the good reminders. Recently, I said to a friend, "That will be perfect". She immediately lectured me to throw that word out of my vocabulary!!

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Bubble, bubble, endorphin bubble!

Monday, November 30, 2009

Felt stronger and better on the treadmill today. Daughter in law is home safe, which is a good thing. Treating myself gently is the order of the week. Had my Jenny treat (a s'mores bar) after workout & savored every bite, sipping coffee. Tonight, life is good... now off to an early bedtime, trying to get my sleep schedule straightened out.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSLZZY 11/30/2009 10:16PM

    Hope your night is restful!

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SUNNY332 11/30/2009 9:50PM

    Way to go - keep up the good work.

Sunny

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NELLIEC 11/30/2009 9:00PM

    It is good that you are taking care of yourself!

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Back to strength training

Sunday, November 29, 2009

During the busy holiday week, I didn't get my strength training in. I did get yard work and housework done. I did get at least 30 minutes of walking a day, in, and I still count this as a win for the week. But when life gets busy, something has to give, and what gave for me at times was tracking the food.

I've been back on track since Friday with the tracking. Today I did a total body strength training session. Can't slack off now... got to keep up the routine.

Onward!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KALIGIRL 11/30/2009 4:57PM

    Great you're back on track.
PS - I think yard & housework can be just as good + you can see the results faster!

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CONCHA77 11/30/2009 9:16AM

    emoticon
Keep it up!
Hugs, Connie

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MSLZZY 11/30/2009 8:09AM

    Way to go! Back on track-good for you! emoticon

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SUNNY332 11/29/2009 8:31PM

    Good for you.

Keep up the good work.

Sunny

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NELLIEC 11/29/2009 7:47PM

    Well, once in a while I miss a strength training session. Thankfully, not too often!!!

It is good that you are back on track!!!

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Bunny Sitting and observing animals with food

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

The kids have two rabbits. I only have a photo of one. His name is Sir Angst. His younger companion, the one I don't have a photo of is Lady Ire. Proving that my son and daughter in law have a warped sense of humor and fit in with the rest of the family.



He's much bigger now, he was a little nipper when the skull picture was taken. Grandma (me) is taking in the mail and feeding the bunnies for the weekend. The first time I dropped in on them, they cowered in a corner of their cage. That was yesterday after work.

I wondered if they would warm up sometime over the course of the weekend. I left work early today and went over to check on them. This time I got the expected behavior, storming the food dish as soon as I cracked the cage door. My d-i-l forewarned me, they are not really starving, they just act like it. They seem to have little control, eating whatever is set in front of them.

Hmmmm... who does that remind me of?

My dog, on the other hand, an athletic breed, can take three days to empty her bowl of kibble. She self-regulates her food intake based on how her body tells her its needs.

Now which breed do I want to emulate?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LINDAJOYWK 11/28/2009 6:38PM

    Funny! I used to have a bunny,and a dashound-they played together-bunny would
growl at the dog-dog thought the bunny was her own personal "raisin"despenser!
By the way,love your pets!-Linda

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KALIGIRL 11/27/2009 9:03AM

    I'd say the dog - beautiful.

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VSWINGLE 11/26/2009 8:26AM

    Cute blog...thanks for giving me something to think about!

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SMARTIEBEE 11/25/2009 5:48PM

    Your dog is just beautiful! And she looks so very fit! My Sammy would eat anything left within reach (and often tries, even though some of it isn't really edible - Like tissues, I don't know what it is with him! I think it is the thrill of stealing it, and trying to get away with it!) I too, would rather be the self-regulator, It is a constant goal to strive for!

Have a Wonderful Thanksgiving!

Shirley


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NELLIEC 11/25/2009 4:45PM

    It is good that your dog is a self-regulator. Some dogs are piggies!!!

I definitely want to be a self-regulator!

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Holiday week

Monday, November 23, 2009

emoticon I imagine that many others, not just myself, will be posting a little less this week, being busy with the US Thanksgiving holiday.

My week will feature "Mom's Taxi Service". Tomorrow morning my daughter in law will show up at my doorstep at 3. Yes, 3 a.m. She will probably have been up all night. I'm a morning person, so my plan is to go to bed early tonight. I need to get D-I-L to an airport about an hour away for a 6 a.m. flight, and in the process, she's also delivering my son's car to me, to store in my garage while he's overseas. The extra time? Weather paranoia--there is a chance of rain/snow mix in the overnight hours.

Her trip is to spend my son's last leave before deployment with him. We have known this day was coming for a long time, and there were times when I could put my head in the sand and pretend it would not actually arrive, but here it is.

How does this affect a "healthy habits" progam? Hahahah! Yes, that's a hysterical laugh. I was asked about my motivation on Saturday: what is my motivation right now? I had to say, with a little tear growing in my eye - "My son. I want to be healthy and strong so that he doesn't need to worry about me."

That, my friends, is at least a portion of my truth: I need to stay strong, but I will also need safe times to feel weak and experience the sadness, the anxieties, and get past them. Stuffing them with excess food is not a solution, it merely transfers the bad feelings to the lapse, instead of dealing with them.

Here's to today. We can only live one day at a time. Let us make the most of it.

emoticon emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KALIGIRL 11/24/2009 4:57PM

    You will stay strong and become healthier every day. Our thoughts are with you.
emoticon

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MSLZZY 11/23/2009 2:30PM

    Only a mom knows the heartache of having a child so far from home and in harm's way.
Other family members, especially spouses, also feel the hurt but it is different, all the same.
Your son is doing what he feels is his duty and I would not subtract from that. Rather, I wish for you the comfort of knowing he has the opportunity to spend time with his wife before his
long deployment. It is their time now. Stay strong and lean on others if you need. We are here for you and I will keep you and your family in my prayers. emoticon

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SUNNY332 11/23/2009 8:34AM

    Bless your heart. Know that I will be thinking of you this week and praying as your
son deploys.

Huggers, Sunny
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