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High amplitude swings in self esteem

Friday, March 01, 2013

Figured THAT title would pull a few folks in. I pulled it, in fact, from a phrase the weatherman used back when I lived in New York State one year when we were under an icy freeze one day, then melt-induced flooding the next, rinse and repeat. He reference that as a "high amplitude weather pattern", wild swings in temperatures.

This week has my philosophical side stepping back and watching the variation in my image of myself as things change around me and as I respond wisely or unwisely. As I recognize the things I can control and the things I cannot control. And as I mentally, sanely process the factors, and re-discover what I really, really want, and keep working toward it.

Eat badly? Beat up on yourself? Or nurture yourself? Get anxious that you can't please everyone? Eat over it? Or step back and reason it through?

People pleasing is a habit from childhood, when one's survival depended on it. Even in adulthood, one has to practice a certain level of social / professional conduct for survival. It is a skill. A very necessary one. What gets out of hand is when one feels crushed by not being able to make everyone happy... i.e. when people pleasing and Polly Perfectionist start sitting in the same room and giving your self-image a going over!

So... here's to a balanced practice of people pleasing... yes, striving for excellence... yes, recognizing the position I am in... and communicating honestly with those who need to hear the message: i.e. speaking the truth to power? Ladies and Gentlemen, whatever you expect, this is what in my professional opinion you can get.

Life is good. And it continues. Spark on! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LILPAT3 3/4/2013 1:38PM

    Everything, I mean EVERYTHING, must be in moderation.

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WATERMELLEN 3/3/2013 4:52PM

    If fat is a feminist issue, so too is people-pleasing (I think) disproportionately socialized in women.

We gotta eat -- but not to excess.

We gotta people please -- it IS an essential skill -- but not to excess.

And we can't eat to excess to console ourselves for failing to people please perfectly!!

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ANDI571 3/2/2013 3:59PM

    People pleasing. Everytime you talk on that subject I hear you loud and clear. I can say I do much better with saying no, but can't always get the guilt that follows to stay away. Thanks again for such wisdom.

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_LINDA 3/2/2013 1:09AM

    Another very thoughtful blog. May you be able to reign in PP and think of pleasing yourself, by doing a job you know is good and can live with, no matter what anyone else may say or think. Its your opinion that matters!
Hope you can have a restful, re energizing weekend!

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PATRICIAAK 3/1/2013 11:47PM

    Love others AS yourself. This blog reminded me of how Biblical and necessary to love yourself/

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CASEYTALK 3/1/2013 11:15PM

    Balance in all things.


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-SHOREIDO- 3/1/2013 8:49PM

    emoticon I'm worried and wondering what's behind all this. Spring fever?winter blah,blah? Left over "flu blues" ?
Keep it coming because I know this is just the tip of the iceberg of your flowing wisdom.
Have a great week-end emoticon



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SLENDERELLA61 3/1/2013 8:03PM

    Yeah, great title. "Amplitude swings"captures something I suspect many of us who have battled obesity have experienced in regard to self esteem.

That philosophical observer side of you sounds very mature and very helpful. Perhaps I should try to find that side in me. People pleasing as a skill - essential especially for the child - I'd never thought of it that way, but yes, you are right.

What a great, respectful, self-respectful statement when in the midst of an impossible situation, a statement to power: "Ladies and Gentlemen, whatever you expect, this is what in my professional opinion you can get." Much better way to handle it than resorting to tears, resignation, or eating -- all of which I have done.

Another brillliant blog, Barb, with lots to think about. Wishing your difficult situation resolves.

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MIZCATHI 3/1/2013 3:15PM

    In the end, I have found that "truth" is not as important as being an authentic person who treats everyone with respect and dignity. Truth is in there somewhere, but can be spoken with sublime messages of action and kindness. Cat

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KALIGIRL 3/1/2013 1:27PM

    Not a people pleaser by nature, so can't relate to your struggle, but can (I think) understand it. We all have drivers, mine just happens to be internal. Internal or external - drivers can 'get out of control' - Here's to Balance!

Life indeed is GOOD - here's to LIVING it!
Lechaim.

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DLDMIL 3/1/2013 11:36AM

    Thank you for another great blog. You are doing an awesome job, keep up the great work mentally and physically. Spark on. Have a great weekend and hopefully the weather will cooperate for you to run outside in the sunshine.

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OVERWORKEDJANET 3/1/2013 11:10AM

    Hooray for people like us who share our "insides" and insights.

I swear it's the end-of-winter blues for me. I'm ready to cry one minute and all gung ho the next. I've recognized this and manage to take some kind of vacation, even a weekend, that involves bringing sunshine in some form to my life...even artifiical will do!
Here's to getting back, staying on or even walking next to track! emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 3/1/2013 10:03AM

    Perfectionism . . . a progress killer! Excellent blog.

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MEXGAL1 3/1/2013 9:50AM

    finding balance is so important. A lesson I must continue to revisit.
Thanks for sharing.
Have a terrific day!
Sallie

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DEBRITA01 3/1/2013 9:05AM

    It can be hard to find the balance when those self-esteem swings start...taming the old self-messages and behaviors that rear their ugly heads in times of stress, conflict, or change when Polly and PP come out to play. We just have to take it a day (or minute) at a time while doing the best we can with the given situation. Better days are ahead... emoticon

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HEALTHY4ME 3/1/2013 8:06AM

    PP is here too but I took a lonnnnng time to recognize her even though hubby and councelor said oh she is here. LOL But I don't find I have a problme with it cos dont see perfectionism as others do.

Hope you have a great friday and weekend!
HUGS

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MSLZZY 3/1/2013 7:50AM

    PP can go outside and play in the snow.Then I won't hear what she has to say LOL!

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MAGGIE101857 3/1/2013 7:28AM

    Some days I want to kick Polly Perfectionist to the curb! But then I feel bad and let her stay; and the vicious circle continues!! I'm still working on trying to find the balance; speaking the truth can be tricky, especially when the ones you are addressing don't want to hear it!

But yes, LIFE IS GOOD!!!

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1935MARY 3/1/2013 7:07AM

    Awesome! Gives me something to think about. All my life I have put everyone above me and tried to please everyone, except myself. Now I think about myself too. Have a great day.

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ELRIDDICK 3/1/2013 7:05AM

  Thanks for sharing

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Feel like I should defend my ex

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Because of course locking me away from my coat was just ONE argument. I stayed married to that man for 14 more years. And he really, really *did* like the end result of my getting healthier. He was proud of my running and was at the finish line of my first 5K, all the way through the last race I ran in that section of the country... which if I recall rightly, was an 8K in 1992.

Marriages are complex things, but the story does illustrate the need to put that oxygen mask on first before helping others. I never have been able to "help" him... and I still care deeply about him, while recognizing that the relationship in the end was not only not helping him, it was killing me, one pint of Ben & Jerry's or one bag of Lay's at a time.

Actually, this work project has made me feel a lot like that marriage made me feel: a paralysis, and as though everything I try to do is going to be slapped down by someone or another. Some folks are a lot tougher than me in the workplace.

I am a self-admitted people-pleaser: I want everyone to be happy. This project has a lot of nuances and strong personalities and missing decisions that aren't mine to make. In short, no control... responsibility without authority? You get the general idea. I won't do specifics, because face it, we all can relate to the generalities and fill in our own details.

So my mantra is to breathe, acknowledge the nasty ugly emotions that it all stirs up, and release them... let them fade... and get on that treadmill in judicious amounts, hopefully paying attention should a knee or an ankle require extra rest.

Draw that old line in the sand, and don't let my people-pleasing tendencies make me feel like a failure when not everybody is happy. Because when folks are diametrically opposed in their desires, chances are good that nobody is going to be thrilled with the end product. Hopefully, some compromise is possible, and I can stop myself from going to the extremes of being either crushed or apathetic... keep my resilience, keep up hope, a positive attitude, and keep my balance! Ah, yes! That's the ticket.

Keep my balance, remember that I am worth taking care of, whether people around me are happy with me or not. I'll never stop caring what folks think, in all likelihood... but I can stop beating up on myself if I am truly in an impossible position and have given it my best shot. emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KASEYCOFF 3/3/2013 4:00AM

    The wisdom the experience has brought you has been - even if it hasn't felt like it at times - well worth the journey, hon. We haven't any true ability to "make" people happy... or sad, or angry, or drive them to whatever behavioral excesses they may care to take up, or whatever.

Those are (thinks me) reactions to circumstances, and reactions can be vented in chosen methods - such as engaging in exercise and self-awareness and reflection.

By the same token, other people don't "make" us overeat - but our reactions to circumstances, whether those circumstances be relationships or the workplace or whathaveyou, might well result in some unhealthy choices.

Gah, Barb, you get me to thinking too early in the day!

Wonder if that means - you "make" me think? lol...
emoticon

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_LINDA 3/2/2013 1:03AM

    So very sorry you have to deal with such workplace stress, that is the worst kind, having no authority :(( You sure are dealing with it in a healthy way, venting with exercise and blogging with great self analysis. The main thing is coming out with your skin and waistline intact, and from this peanut gallery, looks like you have all the tools lined up to do so..
Give it your best, its all we can do, and you sure can't be faulted for that!!

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LESLIELENORE 3/1/2013 4:31PM

    emoticon

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DEBRITA01 3/1/2013 9:30AM

    Great blog, Barb. As much as we'd like to, often there are situations where we can't "help" or "please". Healthy for us to identify those times and accept that... emoticon

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SPARKLISE 3/1/2013 9:29AM

    Such wisdom. emoticon

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GABY1948 3/1/2013 8:09AM

    I think this was an outstanding blog, Barb! I also am a people-pleaser so can totally relate.

Hope you get past this project at work unscathed emoticon emoticon

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BLUENOSE63 3/1/2013 7:18AM

  Great blog

This is a huge life lesson that many women, in particular, need to learn...As natural caregivers we tend to put others first all the time which tends to lead to us being forgotten in the picture.

One of the best things we as women can do for ourselves is to put ourselves first when it involves our health no matter what

Sounds like you have it cased Barb!

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LEANJEAN6 3/1/2013 6:44AM

    Oh Barb---no--you can't please everyone--nor should yu try----People should accept youy the way you are--love yer comment about how yer "Ex"" was killing yu one bag of chips at a time---pretty true !--Somehow I missed your blog yesterday so didn't get the jest of your work being difficult----guess you can't please people there either---all in a day's work----Lynda emoticon

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MNTWINSGAL 2/28/2013 10:58PM

    We people-pleasers need to stick together....isn't Spark People a wonderful tool for doing just that?
emoticon

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MIZCATHI 2/28/2013 10:30PM

    I hope the situation works out. The problem with you being a people pleaser (and trust me, I can relate to that one) are the diametrically opposed people who could give a rat's ... about YOU.

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MSLZZY 2/28/2013 9:39PM

    You found a perfect outlet for the stress at work
by coming home and working out. I am sorry that
work is wearing on you. But as one people-pleaser
to another, you can't please everyone so you got
to please yourself. Find that happy place. HUGS!

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SAMI199 2/28/2013 9:03PM

    emoticon People-pleasing is a hard habit to break..but gets easier with practice.-sometimes...

emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 2/28/2013 8:54PM

    You are soooooo right! You cannot please everyone, so you have to please yourself! First, foremost and always we have to be true to ourselves and be happy with ourselves.

Wishing that things would be less stressful for you! HUGS

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DLDMIL 2/28/2013 8:52PM

    emoticon Keep up the attitude and remember you need to take care of yourself first before you can help someone else. Draw the line in the sand and do what you need to do for yourself first.

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DALID414 2/28/2013 8:45PM

    Responsibility without authority, sounds like my previous job. It's no fun.

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MJREIMERS 2/28/2013 8:38PM

    All you can do is your best and sometimes you just need to ignore those that aren't happy! I've learned not to sweat things that I have no control over!! You can't "make" someone happy, if they chose not to be. You can't "make" someone eater healthier if they don't want to. You can't "make" someone workout if they want to sit.

I like your new mantra! Do things that make you happy in all aspect of your life...work, your ex, etc. You are WORTH being happy and yes, emoticon

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HEALTHY4ME 2/28/2013 8:32PM

    I totally agree with PatricaAK reply ... we all see something or we wouldnt be married in the first place, and believe me there have been times in this marriage I have wondered LOl today for a while being one LOL
HUGS

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PATRICIAAK 2/28/2013 8:22PM

    As I say about my ex, if he didn'f have good points, I wouldn't have married him.

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ANDI571 2/28/2013 8:01PM

    I am a people pleaser, and even though it isn't affecting my marriage it has my friendships and other family relationships. In the past few years I have lost friendships because I learned the word NO! It's sad, but it had to be done for me.

Good work, you are doing awesome!

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JANEMARIE77 2/28/2013 7:54PM

    emoticon You are worth it and don't forget it

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SLENDERELLA61 2/28/2013 7:54PM

    Hoping that impossible situation calms -- that the decisions you need to go forward come -- and that your responsibility and authority match. I love your analysis, self knowledge, and plan. Yes, yes, yes. Take care of yourself. You can do it!! And yeah, a husband that comes to your races has his good points, for sure.

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PARKERB2 2/28/2013 7:44PM

    Remember to please yourself first and then you can please others.

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LIGHTHOUSE0403 2/28/2013 7:41PM

  emoticon

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This date in personal history

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

24 years ago this evening, my then husband locked me out of my room so I would not have access to my coat. This was because I proposed to go to a Weight Watchers at Work meeting to "do something" about my weight. I was so desperate that despite his disapproval at this "desertion" beyond my working all day... I swiped HIS coat from the closet and went to my first meeting.

My hair hung in greasy clumps. I weighed in at 224.5 pounds. Oh, Em, Gee! Talk about discouragement. But they gave me a program to follow, and I was determined to give it a fair try. I followed it to the letter for months and months, and managed to drop 80 pounds. Partway through the weight loss I knew I would need to add activity to keep losing. And in the time I was trying to maintain that loss, I discovered running.

Folks, I would like to say I stayed consistent for that whole 24 years. But NOT! Like folks who have tried to quit smoking multiple times, I fell backwards several times, even regained the whole lot once... BUT... I had learned what it felt like, and I had learned the process... and I never stopped wanting this active lifestyle.

Here I sit, on the 24th anniversary of deciding to "do something about it" and starting. I am at a healthy BMI. I am active nearly every day, even if it's "just a brisk walk". I am eating healthier, and while I still have my slips... I have been catching them sooner, and rejoicing on each return to what I now consider "normal" healthy behavior.

Here's to NEVER giving up hope, even during those slips. Life is too good to miss out: Spark on! Spark people didn't exist 24 years ago, but a spark did light inside me then.

emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CASEYTALK 3/1/2013 11:11PM

    You are such an inspiration.

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DOGLADY13 3/1/2013 8:46PM

    Happy Anniversary (a little late). Well... I guess it's happy. Certainly the journey deserves recognition and admiration. So yes, it is indeed a Happy Anniversary moment!

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MAGGIE101857 3/1/2013 7:34AM

    You've come so far and what a journey it has been! What a journey it promises to be!!! Hopefully we never stop learning, never stop moving, even it sometimes it's backwards!!!
You are an amazing lady!!!!

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BLUEANGELLK 3/1/2013 7:07AM

    Congratulations!!! You are an inspiration to us all!

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_LINDA 3/1/2013 1:59AM

    Taking that first huge step certainly was the start of your determination to better yourself! The fact that you never really gave up totally in spite of set backs shows that you are in this to stay. You do indeed have a great anniversary to celebrate!
Congratulations and very well done!!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SAMI199 2/28/2013 8:59PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MOBYCARP 2/28/2013 8:58PM

    Sometimes we have to remember those bad moments in life to appreciate how good it is right now. Enjoy your celebration of this non-conventional anniversary!

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SLENDERELLA61 2/28/2013 7:48PM

    Brilliant blog!! What a bold step. You've been amazing for a long, long time. And how great that you even know the date to celebrate. It is a milestone to be celebrated!! You have come so far. Healthy movement every day. So much healthy, normal eating. Wanting the healthy lifestyle so much!! -Marsha

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ALEXSGIRL1 2/28/2013 6:18PM

    happy anniversary a wonderful story of achievement you are a winner

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UNSWEETMAMA 2/28/2013 1:58PM

    emoticon emoticon
Thank you for sharing this story.

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DAWN14163 2/28/2013 1:40PM

    Great blog, lovely story! Thank you for sharing.

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SPARKLISE 2/28/2013 1:09PM

    What a great hopeful story!
I too started on Weight-Watchers 28 years ago,and I also regained,but I "knew" what being active and fit felt like, so I never gave up being there again!
I'm happy to say that I'm slowly finding myself out of this binging mess and finding the true meaning of happiness.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KALIGIRL 2/28/2013 12:47PM

    What obstacles you've had to overcome...
Lechaim my friend - you live it well!
emoticon

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LILPAT3 2/28/2013 12:14PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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GABY1948 2/28/2013 11:36AM

    What an inspirational blog! THANK you for being so inspirational! Hope you have as blessed of a day as you have made so many others' day!

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KRISKECK 2/28/2013 10:43AM

    I applaud your incredible determination!

emoticon

You rock!

Cheers,
Kristin

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MNTWINSGAL 2/28/2013 10:26AM

    I weep for the sad woman you were....but I cheer for the strong woman you've become. You have inspired so many other folks with your can-do attitude. Take a bow! That day 24 years ago really was the first day of the rest of your life. So glad you took the leap!

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JULESJET 2/28/2013 10:20AM

    Awesome! Thanks for sharing this!

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LESLIELENORE 2/28/2013 10:17AM

    emoticon

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LINDAKAY228 2/28/2013 9:56AM

    Congratulations on this awesome anniversary of taking the first step. There are lots of hills and valleys in the journey, and times we will do better than others. But that first step was so important! And you've come so far and are such an inspiration to others!

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MEXGAL1 2/28/2013 9:41AM

    Congrats to you! Woo hoo! What a terrific success story you are! I love too that you ditched that man! What on earth would make him not want you to be healthy. Talk about control.
You are such an inspiration.
Have a wonderful day!
Sallie

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MILLERGIRL719 2/28/2013 9:36AM

    emoticon

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BROOKLYN_BORN 2/28/2013 9:03AM

    Happy Anniversary! That's a wonderful story of achievement in the face of an obstinate obstacle (you know who).

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-STARRYEYED- 2/28/2013 8:41AM

    Thank you so much for sharing. I really, really, really needed to hear this story this morning. I love all your blogs, and thank you again for sharing.

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CONCHA77 2/28/2013 8:20AM

    Love to read your stories, Barb. You are a inspiration to all of us. Spark On! emoticon

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MSLZZY 2/28/2013 7:21AM

    You took the first step (and the coat) and walked out of a bad situation to a healthier life. Most journeys have some setbacks but you have still come out on top. WTG!

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HEALTHY4ME 2/28/2013 7:07AM

    Awesome and glad you thought to use his coat, HUGS and congrats and you do catch yourself now and are doing great!

Comment edited on: 2/28/2013 8:30:52 PM

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DEBRITA01 2/28/2013 7:01AM

    I also "liked this" b/c I know it will help so many others by your courage and commitment to yourself at a low point in your life. The most telling line for me is "I never stopped wanting this active lifestyle"....despite any setbacks, deep down you still had the desire and kept trying. You inspire me daily with your blogs emoticon

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DSSECRETS 2/28/2013 4:41AM

    Thanks for sharing this story, Barb. Your journey is very inspiring and you have accomplished so many wonderful things.
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MRS.DOYLE 2/28/2013 3:41AM

    Great blog. I voted to "like it" because lots of people will be inspired by it.
emoticon

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PATRICIAAK 2/28/2013 1:50AM

    super

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LJCANNON 2/28/2013 12:34AM

    emoticon How incredible that you have accomplished so much!! Congratulations & Happy Anniversary!!!

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DRB13_1 2/27/2013 11:55PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon for sharing your inspirational story! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MIZCATHI 2/27/2013 11:09PM

    Phenomenal! Love the story, and the action you take in loving yourself healthy. Cat

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DLDMIL 2/27/2013 11:08PM

    emoticon emoticon You are such an inspiration to all of us. Thank you for you blogging.

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ROXYZMOM 2/27/2013 11:00PM

    I love this blog!! Wow!! You did great!!

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BESTSUSIEYET 2/27/2013 10:56PM

    24 years!! Praising God for all He has enabled you to achieve! Keep it up! Thanks for encouraging us in so many ways!

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SANDYL54 2/27/2013 10:43PM

  You have a wonderful way of seeing the positive! Congrats on your success in caring for yourself and treating yourself with kindness and caring. You are an inspiration! Thanks for sharing, it is so helpful.


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JANEMARIE77 2/27/2013 10:32PM

    woohoo love the attitude

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DALID414 2/27/2013 9:59PM

    emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 2/27/2013 9:54PM

    That is so wonderful that you had the courage to do what you needed to do for yourself! And you STILL do. HUGS

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KIMBERLY19732 2/27/2013 9:35PM

    emoticon

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Celebrating streaks ONE day long

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Seriously, sometimes that's the bootstrap level one is at. Where making it through ONE day is celebration worthy. This morning, I updated my weight on Spark. That was my way of recognizing the reality of what's been happening in my world for the past month to six weeks.

I've had some serious attitude issues. Rebellion, anger, sadness, grouchies, guilt... oh, yeah... the self-sabotage was present.

Over this past weekend I managed to pull off a total of 7.88 miles, in little segments on the treadmill on Sunday... then I ate well over my range the tail of the day AND on Monday. Today, I looked at the number on the scale. And remembered that my "skinny" jeans were feeling snug on jeans day last week.

There are many keys to maintenance, but among them has to be recognition of a slip and actually DOING something about it. So I reset my Spark goal to re-lose this re-gain in the next 10 weeks, leading up to the Lincoln Marathon. Whether I do it as a half emoticon or not.

I pulled up my running shorts and signed on for the State Farm 10 mile. I will NOT sabotage beyond dropping back to the emoticon half marathon distance. And I will NOT injure myself. Allowing myself to continue eating junk is the path to injury... because extra pounds on the knees and ankles... NOT GOOD.

So... that's my pep talk for tonight... fed by the endorphins of ONE good day... today. May this fuel another, tomorrow!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

_LINDA 3/1/2013 2:03AM

    That is a very powerful tool, to be able to recognize you are in a slide and have the mental capacity to put the breaks on.
You are so mentally strong. You have got this!
Way to go signing up for the State Farm emoticon

emoticon emoticon

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CASEYTALK 2/27/2013 8:33PM

    Every streak begins as a streak of one. You can't get where you are going if you don't take that first step.

Congratulations!!!

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ANDI571 2/27/2013 7:25PM

    I'm 9 pounds up from this time last year. I've slipped, now to do something about it. I have finally gotten exercise in my head, now to get the good eating habits to join in.

We can do it, one day at a time! emoticon

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LINDAKAY228 2/27/2013 5:17PM

    I know what you mean. One day at a time is sometimes all I can pull together too.

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BBECKER1955 2/27/2013 5:16PM

    A streak is just one day after another. And you just got the first one!
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LESLIELENORE 2/27/2013 5:14PM

    One day at a time is an important concept!

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MOBYCARP 2/27/2013 5:07PM

    That's good for today. And tomorrow is another day to get through, one day at a time.



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KARIDIAN1 2/27/2013 4:35PM

    Sounds like a great day and good plan.

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1CRAZYDOG 2/27/2013 12:11PM

    Good job, Barb!!! No matter how many times we fall, the most important thing is getting back up! You're doing it. HUGS HUGS HUGS

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MEXGAL1 2/27/2013 10:40AM

    hope the fuel continues to help you have a terrific day today!

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MIZCATHI 2/27/2013 9:18AM

    We are human, no? And we can all do something about improving our situation if we are awake for it.

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KALIGIRL 2/27/2013 8:33AM

    Here's to your GOOD day!

So sorry for the stress the work project is adding + I can't imagine the disruption to your life with your SIL's passing and DS home.

I was commenting on CL's blog that life is full of serendipity and the snow (or lack thereof) has 'made' me change so many plans that I may finally be getting the message...

One GOOD day @ a time...
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Comment edited on: 2/27/2013 8:33:58 AM

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WATERMELLEN 2/27/2013 8:25AM

    Junk food in celebration. Junk food in sorrow. Junk food in boredom. Junk food in joy. Basically in sickness and in health and so long as we both shall live (yup: shortened life span for junk food consumers and thus reduced profits for junk food manufacturers might be the only motivation they'll have to reduce the addictive power of junk foods).

But: you are strong and determined. You have dealt, can deal, will deal.

I'm all for celebrating those short streaks: sometimes 10 minutes is a significant streak, actually!

Comment edited on: 2/27/2013 8:26:46 AM

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LEANJEAN6 2/27/2013 8:11AM

    You can do this------Blame it on yer son returning home--LOL--But---I know you will get back on track--You are trooper!----Lynda emoticon

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CELIAMINER 2/27/2013 8:10AM

    Great determination! I need to learn from your example and keep reminding myself "one day at a time." Sometimes it's even "one hour at a time."

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MIRAGE727 2/27/2013 8:07AM

    Strong, Barb, very strong!
emoticon
I feed on positive thinking! Thanks for sharing and keeping it real!
emoticon

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ROXYZMOM 2/27/2013 7:44AM

    Nice pep talk! Thanks!

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JANEMARIE77 2/27/2013 7:34AM

    woohoo way to go
http://www.sparkpeople.com/assets/q
uote_images/asetbackiswhen.jpg
this phrase says it all great job moving forward

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OVERWORKEDJANET 2/27/2013 6:28AM

    Yep, sometime the bear eats you.
Get a good noghts sleep and ponder a new day.

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DEBRITA01 2/27/2013 6:28AM

    Cheers to one good day and a continued streak. I'm right there with you! emoticon

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SLENDERELLA61 2/27/2013 4:00AM

    CONGRATS on one great day!! May it be followed by many, many more! The first day back on track is often the hardest. You are doing it now; keep it up!! I'm with you. Been experiencing a little rebellion and fatigue myself. Time to redouble efforts!! We can do it. Signing up for the 10 mile is great!! Dropping back to the half marathon sounds like a smart, smart idea to me. Hope that is challenging enough to keep your competitive juices flowing!!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LJCANNON 2/27/2013 12:32AM

    emoticon "You can't change what you don't acknowledge." I think maybe Dr Phil said that? Well, you have acknowledged it, put a Plan in place, and Addressed the Possible Attempted Interference by the Spoiled 2 Year Old that lives in your Sub Conscious (at least I have one! I assume all of us have the Little Voice/Brat in our Heads?)
emoticon You have this!!

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KARRENLYNN 2/26/2013 11:49PM

    I think we all stumble. I think you're on the right track.

Have a great week,

Karen

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DALID414 2/26/2013 11:42PM

    emoticon Barb. I've been struggling with myself too (serious attitude issues). Thanks for your honesty, I feel a bit more human.

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DLDMIL 2/26/2013 11:39PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MNTWINSGAL 2/26/2013 11:20PM

    You are human too, Barb. But you are now back on track, and with very little damage done. Think of the "old Barb," and what she would let a little backslide do to her. Then congratulate yourself on kicking her and her attitude to the curb!

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PATRICIAAK 2/26/2013 10:57PM

    Recognition is the first step to success.

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MSLZZY 2/26/2013 10:53PM

    If anyone can get it done, it is you! Keep pushing! HUGS!

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LANAHAUTH21 2/26/2013 10:49PM

  Good luck for tomorrow. A day at a time.

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Made it through today!

Saturday, February 23, 2013

I was starting down a dangerous path (with food) around mid-morning when my son called and suggested a visit. He brought over the Batman trilogy and the first season of Game of Thrones on DVD and the last tome of the Wheel of Time series book (hardcover). Oh, and some decaffeinated coffee he bought "by accident" not realizing it was decaf. LOL.

We have entered the phase of kids giving mom stuff! In any case, having a visit with son, going for a walk "to see how well the walks in the neighborhood have been cleared", as well as just getting through the week... set me up to finish the day well. Walked about an hour on the treadmill... OK, I maybe jogged about ten minutes off and on in that hour. But the important thing is I *did it*.

One decision at a time, folks. Remembering what is truly important - health. Gotta take care of the body so it's the great place to live it has become... and the habits I've been working so hard to establish... stay "normal".

Here's to the new normal. The Spark normal. Supported by logic and supported by Spark! Spark on! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DETERMINEDLOSER 2/24/2013 9:40PM

    Good choice-Health!

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BOOKAPHILE 2/24/2013 9:38PM

    One decision at a time is all any of us can move forward. Here's to your "Spark normal." I can hardly wait to figure out mine in the coming weeks after I reach my goal.

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DOGLADY13 2/24/2013 9:14PM

    Sounds like today was a victory, even if it included decaf coffee.



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LESLIELENORE 2/24/2013 7:17PM

    Glad you had a good day with your son!

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MJZHERE 2/24/2013 4:02PM

  How nice to have this time with your son. Glad the day turned out well for you.

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WATERMELLEN 2/24/2013 3:40PM

    So nice to be on the receiving end from our adult kids isn't it. Nurturing up: it's especially sweet!

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LINDAKAY228 2/24/2013 2:30PM

    Oh how sweet of him! Glad the day turned out so well!

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OVERWORKEDJANET 2/24/2013 1:35PM

    Have a great walk

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MEXGAL1 2/24/2013 9:21AM

    Kinda nice when the tables turn a bit and the "children" start giving us things or even pick up the tab occaisionally.
Have a terrific Sunday!

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KANOE10 2/24/2013 9:14AM

    Good for you making it through the day and even exercising. Your son sounds like a wonderful support. I love Game of Thrones.

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LEANJEAN6 2/24/2013 8:50AM

    It sounds like you are enjoying yer son#1----and that you are in charge of the healthy stuff in yer life Barb!!! emoticon

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KALIGIRL 2/24/2013 8:48AM

    emoticon NEW normal!

We went to the basketball game and jumped up and down so much the last half, I got my exercise for the day...
emoticon
So glad to hear of your success!

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GABY1948 2/24/2013 8:24AM

    I love this...one decision at a time...and the Spark Normal! THANKS emoticon

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MAGGIE101857 2/24/2013 8:22AM

    Funny I'm reading some organizing books that say give stuff to your kids NOW! Your som must be reading a different book!

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COMPUCATHY 2/24/2013 7:52AM

    emoticon Sounds like a nice visit. And I like this phase of motherhood...don't you...when our kids become our friends, and want to share things. It's nice. Glad you had a nice walk and did some time on the treadmill. It's those good decisions...one by one that make the difference of where we go from here. Keep up the good work! Thanks for the encouragement! Spark on! emoticon emoticon

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DEBRITA01 2/24/2013 7:50AM

    Your son must have sensed you needed some Mom & Son time....and don't you love when the kids bring us things (nice role reversal). Remaining Spark Normal will make this challenging time more manageable....hang in there. emoticon

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MOBYCARP 2/24/2013 7:45AM

    Hurray for the new normal! And hurray for a good relationship with an adult child, that's a gift!

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KELLIEBEAN 2/24/2013 7:29AM

    I like that, the Spark Normal! I'm going to keep that in mind... I'm living spark normal now. emoticon

I'm glad you had a nice time wtih your son.

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DEBRA0818 2/24/2013 5:54AM

    I missed your last blog about being in a rebellious frame of mind, but I thought when I went back and read it that your struggle may be an expression of your ambivalence about the marathon. It's hard to know if losing this pressure would free you to live your life in the new normal, but it's worth thinking about it. We're so used to "telling" ourselves things with our behavior it's sometimes difficult to give it a voice. Could your body be asking you to train for less miles?

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LJCANNON 2/24/2013 12:54AM

    emoticon Very Well Done, Barb!!

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DLDMIL 2/24/2013 12:18AM

    Glad that you and your son are spending time together and that he is there for you during this busy work schedule. Stay safe and warm.

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MNTWINSGAL 2/23/2013 10:47PM

    What a great day! I somehow feel that your son and Jeff would be great friends if thrown together -- I can totally see us in your day, if you know what I mean!

I've been missing your blogs, but I know how busy you've been at work, not to mention all the snow clearing that went on in your area these past few days. Glad you're back!

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SLENDERELLA61 2/23/2013 10:45PM

    That is great that you and your son walked together. And that he gave you decaf -- by accident or not! And he brought things for the two of you to enjoy together. That's just great, Barb!! Love your new normal. Take care.

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PATRICIAAK 2/23/2013 10:38PM

    great choice - health

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SUNNY1432 2/23/2013 10:25PM

    You got more done then I did today, so Way to Go! Have a good rest of your weekend.

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MSLZZY 2/23/2013 10:18PM

    DS knew you needed a little something. Sounds
like the Spark Normal is the way to go. HUGS!

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_LINDA 2/23/2013 10:08PM

    That is awesome your son stopped by bearing gifts -he must have a sixth senth for when he is needed -just the perk you needed :)))
Glad a bad start finished out beautifully :))


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1CRAZYDOG 2/23/2013 10:01PM

    So glad your son visited! HUGS You're right . . . one step-at-a-time, one day-at-a-time.

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DALID414 2/23/2013 9:53PM

    emoticon A girls' gotta do what a girls' gotta do.

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EBEAMS 2/23/2013 9:49PM

    Your blog made me smile cuz I have a son who is pushing things on me too! LOL ... It is so humbling and sweet! I keep telling him to not do it but he doesn't listen! Thank goodness for the rewards that come back around! Hang in there on the job front ... you can do this!

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OPTIMIST1948 2/23/2013 9:22PM

    Sounds terriffic. Made some "lemonade" instead of sucking lemons.

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