Saturday, June 29, 2013
Isn't that a Tim Gunn-ism, from Project Runway? "Make it work". Well, that's how I'm approaching this whole work/active life balance: "make it work." When you don't have control over much else, you STILL have control over your attitude. You can choose to be passive aggressive and do things that hurt YOU and do no good for anybody else... or you can choose to accept things on their terms, conserve your energy, and nourish yourself as best you can to get through it.
That said, I feel pretty worn out. I carefully planned MY overtime so that I didn't have over 9 hour days planned at work, leaving a 4 hour Saturday. OK, so I stayed a bit over, but that's fairly normal for me.
It was dark and quiet at work today. I got into my rhythm, and remembered to go to recess (and packed my healthy snacks). Early into my shift I heard another voice... one of our DBAs popped in to do a bit of work, too... he popped his head into my cubicle and said something teasing, just to acknowledge we were in the same boat, but left me alone to do my thing.
After my recess walk, I was really getting into my tunes, singing along with one of them, in fact. DBA had gone home, so it was again quiet, and I THOUGHT I was alone, then suddenly, there was another face at my cubicle door and I near jumped out of my skin! One of the newer guys was also there doing HIS OT bit... and he had come to see who was singing.
I must have blushed a million shades of red, because he then said, "no, no, it was good... my wife sings well, too". And I made headway, so I felt good at the end of the shift.
But I was tired. Grocery shopped after lunch. Nodded off on the couch. Opted on just an afternoon outdoor gentle walk, as a lovely front had come through, cooling it off. Clouds looked a little threatening and I opted against the pool for of all reasons because I didn't want my car out in it should it decide to drop hailstones. Tomorrow, I promise myself... the pool. And the laundry.
I remind myself how fortunate we are to have as short a work week as we do. It has not been THAT long since "the help" only got a half day a week off. I can certainly live through a few weeks like this.
Attitude, Sparklers. It is all in the attitude. This, too, is like being "in training".
Friday, June 28, 2013
This week it's all been about weather. The first day I backed out of... good call, I would have got rained on during the ride in. Yesterday I opted NOT to bike because of my sister's being in hospital, wanting to keep my options open... BUT, it was also a good call for weather on the morning commute... I got rained on between the car and the office.
So today, not in the forecast... figure I ride in today, and if I do it right, get a brick workout in with the ride home followed by a jog. Wish me the determination to get 'er done!
I did get by to visit my sis after work, to find her in good spirits and staying the extra night just to be monitored, but also because she's in the middle of painting at home. If she went home last night, she would have been pushing furniture around, knowing her! So, that, too was a good call on her part.
The Kelsey news, not as encouraging. They have gone back from sedation to paralysis meds, and an echocardiogram was "inconclusive". Prayers keeping up. I think I might need that jog.
The weekend ahead? I'll work a half day Saturday. Hope to get myself into a pool at least one day.
LIFE is good! What you bring to it is important: bring a good attitude, and the rest will work out. Spark on!
Thursday, June 27, 2013
My blogs are about me, and how I am dealing with life. They are NOT intended to be a critique of my workplace, any of the people I work with, my family members, or any of the other people in my life. They are truly "all about me", and dealing with the feelings that present themselves to me.
Some of the things I say *could* at times offend someone who is on the other side of my feelings, and *could* turn into a he-said, she-said flame war if it went that way (and the other person was aware I said them). When I wrote yesterday about a particular e-mail not being an apology, for example, could cause the writer of that e-mail to become defensive. And I'm not interested in a non-productive distraction.
I thought about this, and as a result, chose to take two of my blogs down, because they mentioned events at work and had a bit more "opining" than I am comfortable with, dancing a line. This is a fact: I've been mandated to work overtime. This is a perception: We are all under a lot of stress right now and I'm more sensitive to what I perceive as criticism when under stress.
What it's really all about is me... and what I do about my feelings. Because I am an emotionally-triggered overeater. So the rest, i.e. what I chose to do: take a walk, ride the bike to work, eat what's in the bag, write a blog, etc. are the relevant bits... not the internal "opining" that triggered the feelings to begin with.
That said: I'm having "a week". After the overnight duty on Friday-Saturday, my sleep schedule disrupted, I've been not at the top of my game.
Monday, I left my day planner at home. Fortunately, while at work, I operate off the computer version.
Tuesday, I managed to make it to work missing my wallet. Fortunately, I had everything I needed packed in the lunch bag. And my coffee card was in the desk drawer.
YESTERDAY... I managed to get to work on my bicycle... MISSING THE BAG! (Yes, the "eat what's in the" bag.) Fortunately, there are healthy options, including fruit and nuts and a salad option at the cafeteria in the basement of the work building... AND I didn't forget the same thing twice, i.e. my wallet was with me.
This morning, I awoke to find e-mail from my older sis... from the hospital. She's had a health flare up that has landed her there! And Kelsey has had an up and down week, still on life support, stable, now entering the third week.
So... that's life. For today:
* Remember to TAKE the bag. Eat what's in it.
* Drink your water... is good for you.
* No bike today... check in with sister after the mandatory OT and maybe swing by hospital to see her!
* It will NOT kill you to take a rest day from the other exercise, but don't forget to go to recess... walking breaks at work do help keep you sane-r. Or less in-sane.
LIFE is precious, and fragile. Savor it. Recognize moments of happiness. Be as kind as you can... to yourself as well as to others. And Spark on!
Monday, June 24, 2013
This morning something struck me in my Spark daily e-mail. It was the grin on the face of the "success story" featured blog. And it was MOBYCARP's blog about battling to maintain motivation. And it has been my own reaction (physical and mental) to the prospect of the overtime. It is the reminder of the JOY that comes with shedding weight and becoming active.
And it is the reminder of how much easier life is in the lower weight range than it was in the upper range! Not that life becomes perfect, it does not. All those things that drove you nuts at 225, still drive you nuts at 125.
BUT... you do different things with the nuts. And if you are wise, you pay attention to small details.
Last night, I got myself out the door. It was warm and the sun shone down, even though it was "late" in the day. It started out as a walk, just to get the 10,000 steps in. Moderate speed, I told myself. It's warm out here. I was wearing shorts, walking shorts, not running shorts. But I had on my Lincoln Marathon tech shirt, kind of my personal statement to myself that I'm NOT going to let this OT thing get me down.
I flipped on the Runkeeper app on my smart phone, as well as the tunes, and started down the sidewalk. I turned into the neighborhood park. When I got to the other side of the park, I had a choice to make. Loop back into the neighborhood, or cross the street and go "around the lake". Often this decision hinges on whether there is a break in traffic. It's a busy street.
There was a break, so I crossed the street. I was now committed to go by the golf course. I told myself I would go see the lake, but I could turn around after I had gone 15 minutes, to get my 30 minutes of walking, no matter what, in.
But something happened. I hit the ten minute mark and shortly thereafter made the turn into the walk-way between the golf course and the houses of the neighborhood. And my... legs... wanted... to jog. So... I... did. Intervals, right? 1 minute... then walk again?
You could almost see the stress get stripped away as this progressed. I stopped worrying about the time, and just jogged to the end of the lane where it would turn. I took a walk interval. I jogged slow and easy... and it came to me as the joy in motion grew... and as the stress melted away... that all those motivational speakers are right.
Right about what? That the hardest part of your workout is getting yourself to walk out the door to begin with. Once you start, the joy takes over. OK, this may not happen the very first time you work out (on the other hand, some people do become addicted at first outing)... BUT once you have done the hard work, this corner DOES turn... and you get to "here". Here, where the fit body has a mind of its own about what it wants to do.
If you have it with you, the music gets to you: Don't stop believing, the eye of the tiger, what makes you beautiful, walking on the sun, tubthumping, some nights... all the tunes I had downloaded as rewards for myself. They just pulled me along.
I finished that run/walk at 4.12 miles. "Just to get 10,000 steps in." But I got a whole lot more. Drenched in healthy sweat, I followed up with a shower and a proper bedtime.
Now it is Monday morning. I am armed for this work week. Let me savor and remember this workout. A good workout is a way to remind myself that fit is where I want to be... that for as long as I'm granted the ability to be active, I need this. Remember.
LIFE is good... Spark on!
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